A long time ago, I started a humorous fic about a new student at Hogwarts who's a death metal head. I never finished it because it was quite horrible, but the idea of metal culture in HP somehow stayed with me — after all, the wizarding world seems to be stuck somewhere in the 80's, and it's the time where death metal reigned!
And so, inspired by real-world examples, I somehow came up with an idea of creating a parody: a wizarding metal band named Azkaban (of course, written with an appropriately indecipherable gothic font). This songfic is actually a collection of (appropriately cheesy) lyrics from their first album, Cacophonic Incantations — well, for now just the first half of it. This album would be something between black and death metal, with some epic and heavy thrown in for good measure.
I would like to thank J.K. Rowling (who owns the name Azkaban and other Harry Potter references that might appear here), and of course metal groups which Azkaban mocks: Asphyx, Behemoth, Dimmu Borgir, Kat, Lux Occulta, Manowar, Mörk Gryning, Therion, Vader, and similar true disciples of Satan. Hail to you all!
Rated T for content and language, it's fucking metal after all.
Side A
1. THE DARK LORD (THE AWAKENING) 3:43
2. THE SACRIFICE 4:17
3. DAYS OF THUNDER 4:01
4. AVADA KEDAVRA 3:22
5. SHREDS OF NOTHINGNESS (ballad) 6:20
6. SNAKE FROM BEYOND (THE RECRUITMENT) 4:31
THE DARK LORD (THE AWAKENING)
[instrumental]
THE SACRIFICE
Hanged by my grazed hands
Over the pool of seething blood
Where a hundred black candles burn
I felt my soul tremble and twitch
All my humanity I spat
OUT!
A thousand demons scream inside my body
They reap the fabric of reality
I hear myself speak all
All the languages of the world
Now I see
What mustn't be seen
The inevitable truth
Shadows behind the veil
I can feel their coldness
I can feel their alienation
I can hear their call
And suddenly
In a blink of a sightless eye
I am... re-bo-o-o-rn...
DAYS OF THUNDER
Thunderstruck by the Great Wild
Growling echoes in the night
Darkness' troops are to deploy
They know just one word -
- DESTROY!
Divine Riders of Seven Gates
Possessed by the Elements
The True Power, The Only One
Blood and despair on the run
Now the world is all on fire
Overpowered by the Mark
the everburning desire
Brings all things back to the Dark
AVADA KEDAVRA
The Killing Curse!
The Killing Curse!
The Killing Curse!
THE KILLING CURSE!
SHREDS OF NOTHINGNESS (ballad)
Your body, blown with the wind
Fallen leaves and dust within
In my heart, all hope lay slain...
Will your soul haunt me again?
On the lost road to nothingness
I only see my perishness
Lost for the world, lost for myself
Where only shadows dare to delve.
Please, join me in this astral void,
Among the falling asteroids,
No soul, no body, no mind at all...
To Hell together we shall fall.
SNAKE FROM BEYOND (THE RECRUITMENT)
I slither between her marble-white legs
I summon her spasmodic moans
I am the master of her body
But I am reaching for so much more
I kiss her innards with my tongue
I overwhelm all her desires
I make her beg, she's begging for more
But all of it's bound to return — to me...
Now I can taste her very soul
Now she is ready to take me inside
Her eyes are wide, she's trembling now
We are together — the snake and its prey
Tomorrow she will take a new way
Tomorrow she will be my slave
As from now on, we are one with the bond
The Witch and the Snake from Beyond.
If you people like this (or at least like to torment yourselves with this), I will complete Side B, but it depends on reception — I don't feel like doing it just for myself. So read and review, folks!
