Disclaimer: Only in my head and I don't even own that.

Warnings: Language mostly

Author's Idiocy: chases Zell with a tent pole -- Long Story

GET BACK HERE SO I CAN KILL YOU! DON'T EVER BE THAT DIFFICULT AGAIN!

-- 3 hours later --

It's taken me so very very long to finish this very simple oneshot, and it's pure crap. It started off as me wanting to put Squall on stage. And well I did do that. I blame that bunny on Britney Spears and her music video for "Gimmie More". Ya know, I just watched that vid and I couldn't see anybody but Squall. ponders and giggles

Please leave me a little note. They make me happy.

--

Zell wandered the hallways at Balamb Garden

Zell wandered the hallways at Balamb Garden. The party seemed to be going long into the night, the music from the great hall fading into the background with every step. He was quickly losing interest in the party since the face he wanted to see there had left long ago.

Many of the people Zell had asked had said they had seen him talking to Quistis. And when Zell had asked where Quistis had gone, they had said she had left for the secret place to meet someone. The thoughts flowing through his blonde head filled in the rest, and none of them were the most pleasant of thoughts, especially for what he had planned for this evening.

He just needed to get away now. He was a SeeD now so he didn't think that it would be too much of a problem if he went into town for the night. And he had just the place too.

There was this small bar just on the other side of town. He had heard of it a few times when he was younger but he had never been there before. It was about time that he checked it out. It catered to his tasted and he was old enough to drink, so why not.

He slipped into the parking garage and took his usual car from the parking lot. His car was small and red, not nearly a car that a sensible person would buy. But he didn't want to be sensible when it came to getting away. He passed a few monsters at the side of the road. Training forgotten in the need to get to his destination, not even the prospect of picking up some magic turned his head.

He was upset and didn't need a reminder of anything to do with his life right now.

He decided that he didn't want to go through town so he took a back road that would back trail around the small port. Balamb wasn't that big of a town and he was known there. His mother lived on Main Street after all. And everybody knew her. If they had seen him in town they would have told her, and she would have come looking for him.

And there was no way he wanted that.

If his mother even knew he was going to a place like this she would most likely tie him up, throw him in the basement and not let him out until he was fifty years old.

Just up ahead he could see the sign. A woman sat in a man's lap giving him a pair of blue balls. The name of the bar written in neon lettering below them, Boules Bleues it proudly stated.

Zell laughed at the veiled pun contained there in. But I guess the whole point to the sign and name was to be tasteful enough that the residents didn't close the place down.

Zell parked the car and remember to set the alarm, he was on the wrong side of the tracks, literally and figuratively, and didn't want to find out that he had to have to walk all the way back to garden.

From the outside the building looked rather run down, the bricks on the outside crumbling with age, but as soon as he walked in the door he knew that was just a cover.

Rich red carpet covered the floor, brass fixtures for everything, door handles, chairs, tables, small lamps. Red velvet covered the chairs and benches. The walls had red drapes hanging down them. What wasn't soft red fabric was shiny brass. It all just looked so expensive to him.

Looking around the room he saw a gentle mix of both genders, proof to him that things would be mixed on stage as well. As much as the woman on stage excited him he just wasn't in the mood for that.

Waving over a pretty little girl, who at first glance could have been that Selphie girl's twin, he ordered himself a drink. "Make it as strong as you can," he had told her. She nodded her head and moved off to talk to the bartender.

The music was soft and the women on stage twisted smoothly into positions that Zell wasn't entirely sure were possible.

When his drink arrived he just slowly sipped at it. Trying to figure out why anybody would want to touch their head to their feet.

"Ladies and Gentlemen!" A voice on a loud system said over the music. "We have a treat for you tonight. Although he had said that he was retiring, and that last night was to be his last performance on stage, our star has come back to us."

The crowd broke out into a great cheering roar as most of the woman moved toward the stools at center stage.

"Years and years he has been a highlight on this stage. Lighting our lives with his perfection and beauty. Our very first dancer when the doors opened.

"And without further ado I bring you on center stage, the one, the only, let's give him a big Boules Bleues welcome back, Leo DeShiva."

Zell tried to hear the music as the woman up front were screaming at the tops of their lungs, but soon gave that up when a large lion head parted the curtains at the back to the stage. The lion started to move onto the stage with a feline grace, trailing behind it what looked like a golden fur coat. The back of it tailing back and brushing the floor as the figure moved. Underneath he could see a nice set of long pale legs, a little too smooth to belong to a man, but far too thick and muscular to belong to any woman.

The figure lifted the lion head off their shoulders and let it fall to the ground beside the stage. Long orange hair was shook out falling over the fur coat and covering most of the figures face.

From this distance Zell could tell that yes, this person was definitely male, and far too good looking to be anything but dangerous.

Zell grabbed the arm of a passing waitress.

"Tell me," he started, he had to pause, swallow and lick his lips, "If that his stage name or real name?"

Zell's eyes were glued on the figure on stage. Bending in half with the aid of the brass poll.

"As far as we know that is his real name. He hasn't given us any other." She paused and looked up at the stage. The man was slowly removing the fur coat and letting it slide over his well formed body to the floor. "Would you like me to set you up with a one on one later?"

"You can do that here?"

"Hey, whatever those prudes up at Garden don't know can't hurt them."

"Garden? What about Garden?" Zell looked a little shocked to hear about it. But still didn't move his eyes from the beauty he was observing.

"They are the underlying law around here. Sure we have the town police, but they don't do anything. So we give them a little money each month and they keep the worst of the thugs away. All our bouncers are reject SeeD."

Zell was kind of shocked at that. He hadn't known what had happened to the people who never made SeeD. And in a way it was a good idea. "Thank you, and if it's not too much trouble I think I will."

She nodded and went on her way.

Zell looked back up to the stage to see the man wrapped around the brass pole slowly spinning his way down to the base ending on his knees.

The man dipped his head back letting the orange hair fall from his face.

And there, staring at Zell, were the stormiest grey-blue eyes he had ever know. A pair of eyes that haunted Zell to every breath he took. And a very unique scar that crossed between them.

"SQUALL!" Zell yelled at the top of his lungs standing up so quickly the chair behind him fell over in a clatter.

Squall stood up quickly and grabbed the fur coat that was lying not to far away.

"Zell," Squall glared at the blonde as Zell slowly moved forward pushing the woman out of his way. "You shouldn't be here. You should be over at Garden enjoying your graduation party."

"So should you!"

"Whatever."

"Come on Squall," Zell said as he gripped Squall by the upper arm successfully dragging the brunette off the stage. "I'm taking you back now!"

"Zell, would you stop!" Squall yanked his arm out of the martial artists grip. "If you haven't noticed, I'm working right now and half naked."

Zell did in fact at that moment realize that Squall was more then half naked. He was mostly naked. Only a very tight pair of leather shorts and the fur coat loosely flung over his shoulders. Squall wasn't even wearing his trademark Griever pendant. And he did have to admit that the long orange hair was erotic.

"Come on," Zell reached out again and tried to grab Squall's arm again. "Let's get you dressed and I'll take you home. You don't need to work here. You are a SeeD, besides you make more then even old man Cid."

"Leo, this guy bothering you?" A voice from behind Zell said. He could vaguely remember that voice form somewhere

"I can handle it Ares." Squall said as he waved on the bouncer. "Zell …"

"Chickenwuss?"

Zell spun on his heels too look into a pair of fiery green eyes with a scar matching the one he dreamed of, only this one he feared with all his being.

Immediately Zell's defenses sprung up. "Almasy," he growled.

"Now I know he's bugging you princess." Seifer picked Zell up by the back of the collar to escort him outside and dumped him on the curb. "A little word of advice Chickenwuss. Don't ever start dragging a guy around when his overprotective boyfriend is near, because next time you'll be leaving here without your blue balls."