A/N: I have recently fallen in love with the musical Aida. It is, in my opinion, one of the saddest stories I've ever heard, and the music is wonderful. As soon as I heard "Radames' Song," I knew it was a perfect song to write a fanfic around. I chose Roger/Mimi as the ship because I can't imagine anyone but Adam Pascal singing it. As I wrote, I found myself also sticking part of "How I Know You (Reprise)" into the plot line. The last bit of that is my own personal revision to make the end fit. So this is a double-Aida songfic, in a way. Oh, and the last line is from "Written in the Stars." Also Aida.
Disclaimer: Don't own RENT. And Tim Rice and Elton John own Aida.
The Letter
"Fine, Roger!" Mimi screamed, shoving her arms into her coat as angry tears splashed down her face. "You think I'm not good enough for you, I'll leave!"
"Fine!" Roger shouted back, clenching his fists. "I don't need you!" Mimi slammed her way out of the apartment and clattered down the stairs. "I don't need you," he repeated softly, before collapsing on the couch and burying his head in his hands.
Things for the couple had been spiraling downward for nearly two months, ever since Roger caught Mimi using again after weeks of being clean. The dancer begged for forgiveness and promised she wouldn't do it again - but a week later Mark found needles in her coat pocket. For the past month and more, it did appear that Mimi had stopped again, but Roger no longer trusted her and she constantly saw him conducting searches of her things. He also treated her coldly and suspiciously, no matter how many times she asked him to stop. Finally, the situation had erupted into the heated fight that sent Mimi storming out of the Loft.
Roger sighed heavily as tears leaked through his fingers. Thinking back on it all, he wished he hadn't been so hard on the Latina. He remembered that his own withdrawal had been close to unbearable, and that he had cheated several times as well. Mimi was even younger than he had been, and deep inside he knew his recent distant nature had only made her pain worse. He loved Mimi, and he had never meant to hurt her.
Eventually, when he was cramping from huddling in the same position for so long, Roger decided that, first thing in the morning, he would pay the dancer a visit.
--
But Mimi wasn't in her apartment all through the next morning. In the afternoon, Mark persuaded his friend to accompany him to the park. Roger was reluctant to leave in case Mimi returned, but no sooner had the pair reached their destination before he saw her walking down the street. His heart leapt…until he saw who was at her side. Benny.
Anger boiled in his chest, and he almost approached them, except Mimi looked up just then and met his gaze. Her stare was cold, and she turned away before he could speak.
It was the same for the next three days. Mimi always managed to be out when Roger sought her. At one point, Roger decided he didn't care – if Mimi was going to be nasty to him, he would be nasty right back to her. But then he remembered her hurt face, her sad eyes…and he kept trying.
Finally, he decided the only way he was going to get through to Mimi was to write her a letter, since she didn't have a telephone. It seemed so impersonal, but perhaps it would make a mark when nothing else could. So he took a pen and a (relatively) clean piece of paper and sat down to write.
Dear Mimi…
Such a cliché salutation. But it was the only one he deemed suitable for this shaky relationship.
Dear Mimi…
The next hour was spent writing and discarding many drafts of the letter. One was too informal, the next too informal, the next too judging…and so on and so forth.
Finally, Roger began singing softly to himself, pouring his feelings out onto paper without even realizing he was writing.
Dear Mimi,
I'm sorry for everything I've said
And for anything I forgot to say, too
When things get so complicated
I stumble
At best, muddle through
I wish that our lives could be simple
I don't want the world - only you
Oh, I wish I could tell you this face to face
But there's never the time…never the place
So this letter will have to do
I love you...
Before he could change his mind, Roger ran downstairs and slipped the note under Mimi's door. Then he retreated to the Loft to wait.
It was much later when a rustling noise alerted Roger to the small, folded piece of paper slowly sliding through the crack under his own door. Slowly, he unfolded his legs and crept over, unfolding the paper with trembling fingers.
Dear Roger,
There is a time
There is a place
When love should conquer all
The rest of life is pushed aside
As truth and reason fall
I've reached that time and place, and now
I've come to understand
Loving you has never been
Exactly what I'd planned
But I love you
Yes, I love you...
Roger stood, just as the door slid open to reveal a smiling Mimi.
"Mimi…" Roger breathed, reaching forward hopefully. She took his hand and stepped inside. "I'm sorry-"
"Shh…" she whispered, wrapping her arms around him. She kissed him gently. "Apology accepted."
"I love you," he murmured into her hair.
"Love you more," she whispered.
What it is to be in love, and have that love returned…
A/N: So...review.
