CHAPTER ONE
Hallo readers! My name is Myna (aka Missy-Dedodakes) and here with me is TB (aka Senom.) Out of boredom, and an intense desire to torment our characters (boreDOOM?) we decided to throw them onto Total Drama Island's Camp Wawanakwa and see what happens, with ourselves as the sadistic hosts…
Senom's characters are—
Ayna; a sweet angel girl who has a knack for using frying pans as weapons,
Sayble; a shadow princess who has a penchant for air vents and explosives,
Xan; a little boy who's also a cyborg-angel,
Ceris; a teenage girl who, like Xan, is a cyborg-angel and also a cunning killer when it's necessary, and
Lilac; a Guardian of the Crystal who practically looks like a cosplayer, with hair the same color as her namesake.
My own characters—
Spencer; a electrokinetic bounty hunter for an evil mad science Company,
Razi; a scientist from that Company who also happens to be a psychotic loon,
Nolan; one of the cyborg angels who's the oldest, possibly wisest, and most depressing of them all,
Keres; an eight-year-old cyborg angel with an addiction to SunnyD and Prozac, and
Malcolm; a random kid from an island who kinda got caught up in this entire mess. Poor Malcolm.
All of the stories around these ten characters are ours alone, and in the grand nature of fanfiction, disclaimer goes out to the guys who made the original TDI, because YOU'RE FRICKIN' AWESOME 8D
CHAPTER ONE: THE BEGINNING OF THE END, AND ALSO A BIT OF CHAOS AS WELL
X
With Spencer and Razi
It was a quiet day on the docks of Camp Wawanakwa. The sea was breezy, the beaches were warm and seaweed was being dumped onto the sand in massive amounts. A few pelicans were flying about in the air, waiting for helpless civilians to wander into their zone of attack. (Their target would be old ladies with bread crumbs, or children small enough to eat. Thank god no one under the age of five is coming here—EXCEPT XAN! OH GOD, XAN! RUN WHILE YOU CAN!—)
Anyway, a ship was coming towards the island. On it were two people; a tall, blue-haired man who for once was not wearing a thick green winter jacket but a black t-shirt, and a slender woman with jet-black hair and a tank-top. Both of their exposed arms showed long barcodes, as if they were property. Only Spencer, the blue-haired one, seemed uncomfortable about people being able to see those. Razi, it seemed, was in a completely different world.
"—and at the rate this boat is going, if we don't start to stop now, we'll crash right into the dock~" she was saying with a kind of childish fervor for destruction.
Unfortunately for Raz, while this was happening their boat just docked awkwardly, tilted sideways so that only a corner of the boat actually attached to the dock. Spencer stepped out, almost tripping over himself as he did. "Who docked this thing?"
"That would be me!" Myna, one of the authors and co-hosts, vaulted out of the ship and landed on the dock. "Hmmm, I seemed to have almost missed it completely... well at least I'm not as bad at this as parallel parking..." She pointed out cheerfully. Spencer sighed.
"And how bad at you at parallel parking?"
Myna frowned. "Well, remember that building on 81st that a car crashed into and destroyed the entire back entrance?"
"...but the back entrance wasn't on the street." Spencer said slowly. Myna gave him a look. "Oh, GOD..."
X
With Keres, Ceris and Lilac
On a ship fairly close by, there were two—what the heck WERE they, anyway? Cosplayers of angels with tech pads on the back of their necks?—people, we'll settle for people by the way, arguing their throats out. Or something.
"For the last freaking time, NO GIVING PROZAC TO XAN." Ceris snapped at the eight year old girl before her. Ceris was waving a bottle of pills in Keres's face, bright red hair getting in her eyes.
Keres waved a fist at Cer. "I didn't GIVE them to him, I was gonna give 'em to Nol, but Xan went through the box and thought it was candy!" she yelled furiously. Her voice was so loud that even Spencer and Razi on the dock could hear her yelling "AND NOW WE'LL HAVE TO PUT UP WITH XAN FOR THE REST OF THE CAMP, TOO—"
"KERES, SHADDAP." Ceris prepared to throw her into the water—
—and a purple haired girl who looked oddly like a Final Fantasy cosplayer stepped out onto the boat's deck.
"Both of you shut up, some of us are TRYING to get some sleep." Lilac snapped, rubbing her eyes.
Keres ducked out of the way and shoved Ceris towards the waves. "Sharks're looking hungry, Cer!"
X
With Nolan and Xan
Meanwhile, another ship, this one much smaller, was plodding along behind Keres' and Ceris' ship.
"You think they've killed each other yet?" Nolan mused, grabbing his bag and turning to Xan. "Say, you seem unusually hyper today, Ker didn't drug you or something, did she?" he started to ask suspiciously.
"Ummmm... nooooo..." Xan replied. "Hey, look! It's a dock! A dock! C'mon, Nolan, let's SWIM to the dock! The water's great!" The four year old prepared to jump into the ocean.
"Do NOT go in there." Nolan told Xan firmly.
Xan then started complaining loudly to Nolan about wanting cookies, and how Kerebear was a meanie and why do sharks eat people, do we taste good? He then proceeded to nibble on his arm.
"Tastes like metal." He frowned. "It's hard, isn't flesh squishy-squashy?"
"…"
X
With Ayna, Sayble and Malcolm
Meanwhile, on another boat way ahead that had just docked, a blue haired girl in a kimono stopped the boat a few feet from the dock.
"Alright, Sayble, Ayna, you two are gonna have to make the jump. If you land in the water, don't worry, Myna's got the sharks locked up... Oh hey Myna!" Senom waved cheerfully. "The sharks ARE locked up, aren't they?"
"I thought YOU were gonna lock up the sharks." Myna said in dead seriousness.
Ayna glanced across the water hopelessly and watched as Sayble ran and dove for the dock, just barely managing to get onto it without drowning. "... I'm not crossing that."
Malcolm had stowed away on Sayble and Ayna's boat and looked out over the water. "That's not too bad, but SHARKS? C'mon, why try to kill us before we've even stepped ashore?" he groaned and went looking for a gun onboard.
"... Well, this makes the first challenge all the easier." Senom whispered to Myna. "Who'll we use as bait to get em in the right spot, th—KERES I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, IF YOU THROW HER IN THE WATER I'LL MAKE SURE YOU'RE FIRST ELIMINATED." She yelled upon seeing the fight taking place on a nearby boat.
"You can't do that!" Lilac called.
"We're the authoresses, sweetheart, of course we can." Senom yelled back. Ayna groaned.
"Look, let's just get this stupid competition over with..."
"And no killing the sharks. We need them for the challenges, just get out of the boats and we'll start the whole 'break the fourth wall and introduce to the readers' thing." Senom rolled her eyes. At that point, Keres and Ceris's boat teleported to the dock, along with another containing two other people that the joint author here will leave to Myna...
"Sorry, Xan, Nolan, but you said you'd fly here!" Senom called, smiling. Ceris just jumped off of the boat and thrust Keres at Myna.
"She has drugs on hand."
Nolan rolled his eyes and stepped out of the boat. "Well, we WERE gonna fly," he grumbled, folding his wings back up. Perhaps all he'd really wanted was to show off to the others.
Keres, meanwhile, was defiant. "I have no drugs! XAN took all my Prozac!"
"Ooooh, do you know what'll happen to your kidneys if you take too much of that Prozac~?" Razi asked, and Spencer was inclined to whack her.
"No one CARES, Raz. It's gonna be bad enough here without you spreading horror stories around." He muttered and walked towards the others. Malcolm pocketed the gun and just walked onshore.
"Sooooo, uh—"
"FIRST THINGS FIRST!" Myna blew a whistle, which was so shrill several people almost fell off the docks from the shock alone. She on the other hand was merely contemplating the redundancy of a sentence 'first things first.' "How many of you are carrying weapons?"
There was a dead silence.
"C'mon seriously you guys, I'm not an idiot."
"I'd venture to doubt that—" Spencer began before Myna snatched a gun from him.
"Mmmm, nice make, what else've you got on you? Blades, anything? Keres, no hiding the SunnyD!" She snapped, spinning around to find the brunette shoving yellow drinks in her purse.
"SunnyD's not a weapon!" The girl shot back furiously, her face red already from yelling. Myna scoffed.
"I don't CARE! Give it up, sucker!"
"I'm keeping this." Malcolm said quietly, hiding the gun. I'm probably gonna need it, with these people...
"Ayna, frying pan. Sayble, all the dynamite. AND the knives in your boot." Senom demanded. "Lilac, I'm gonna have to confiscate the crystal."
Ayna whistled. "Ummm, what frying pan?" She asked sweetly, hiding one behind her back. Sayble whacked her with the flat end of one of her knives before handing them to Senom and thrusting a bag of explosives at her. Lilac gave up her crystal, but not without swearing under her breath. "You do realize that's the one thing keeping me from shriveling up and becoming a mound of dust, right?"
"Whatever, you'll be fine. Author powers." Senom muttered, snapping her fingers once she had a free hand. "Mal, give the gun to Myna."
"What're you talking about—" Mal began before his gun was confiscated. "Oh, come on..."
"Keres, SunnyD, Prozac and any other drugs... Nolan... how many knifes do you have with you?" Myna asked sternly. Not willing to start a fight, Nolan just sighed and handed over a rather large collection of knives and little daggers. Next up was Spencer, who was loaded with enough weapons to slaughter an entire office building twice over. Myna stopped at Razi. "Ohhh boy..."
"The chloroform is for special purposes, and the cyanide might come in handy you know~" Razi, a twenty-six year old woman who was older than everyone else in age, (but younger than them all when it came to nonviolent problem-solving) began in defense.
Senom rolled her eyes and gave Razi a death glare. "Give her the syringes, the chemicals, the knives, anything else that's sharp, and anything else involved with your happy fun time. You'll get your fill later, but for now..."
Razi hissed but handed over everything. After she did, Myna tossed the bag full of weapons, syringes and SunnyD into the air, snapped her fingers, and it disappeared.
"You'll get this back later. For now, we go to the campfire, where we will determine your teams!" she cackled like a maniac.
Senom skipped alongside Myna. "Umm, this does count as basically i— wait a minute." Her eyes narrowed at Myna. "We agreed five each, right? You only brought... hang on..." She counted. "—ah, never mind. I forgot to count Keres and Nolan... but yeah, does this count as the introduction of characters?"
"Yep, guess so." Myna shrugged, leading them all to the campfire. Nolan sat on the log furthest away from Keres, and Malcolm lingered near Nolan as well, figuring Nol was the only sane one around here besides himself. Little electric sparks came off Spencer's fingers, and he sat down as well. Razi lingered off to the side.
Ayna chose a seat across from Spencer, and Xan sat down next to Keres, chattering away. Ceris snuck over next to Nolan. Sayble hung around Lilac, who was a little closer to where Razi was than she would have liked (if she had known just what the woman did for a living, but to Li had the impression that Raz was just a little scatterbrained.).
"Alright, for our first team, the Jumping Jellyfish..." she began, and several people almost vomited.
"Quit throwing up on the fire, vomit can put those out, you know. Or make them bigger, can't remember which." Senom muttered crossly. "Anyway, in the Jumping Jellyfish team, we have Lilac, Ayna, Nolan, Spencer and... ergh... Razi... STOP STARING AT ME LIKE THAT, I'm your joint authoress, not a Project." She directed this last comment to the scientist she had called last. "As for the Carebear Clan..."
Several more people started losing whatever they ate for breakfast. Or lunch. Or brunch.
Myna unrolled a sheet of papyrus. (As much as she liked to believe she'd gotten this from the Nile, it was actually from a Wal-Mart, and it was so fake that the sheet itself was starting to fall apart.) "On the Carebear Clan, we got Ceris, Xan, Malcolm, Sayble, and Keerress!"
"I'm on a team with HER?" Ker demanded, pointing at Ceris, before realizing something else. "Wait... CAREBEAR CLAN? YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE, YOU NO GOOD— [censored] [censored]..."
"Oh my." Malcolm grumbled sarcastically, realizing he was stuck on the team with Keres. "Myna, can I have my gun back?"
"Actually, I did it on purpose." Senom grinned. "I got the idea for that name, Jumping Jellyfish can file complaints to Myna later."
"And let the horrible ratings for team names roll in..." Ceris muttered sarcastically.
"Yaaaay! Everyone's on a team together, except Nolan but he never liked being around people anyway, hey what's thaaaaaaaaaaaattt..." Xan muttered before hitting the ground with a thud. Ayna stood behind him, hand against his OFF switch.
"You're welcome." The angel muttered before stalking back to her seat.
Keres defensively put her hand up, covering the switch on the back of her neck. "Why do we have off switches...?" She began to ask with a raised eyebrow.
Spencer looked up. "Off switches? You mean you guys are robots?" He asked, and his eyes suddenly lit up, literally. Myna gave him a death glare.
"Boy, you do anything to those cyborg angels and I'll make your codes burn so bad HELL will seem cooler." She hissed. Spencer groaned in annoyance, going back to normal, and Nolan and Keres both moved several feet away very, very fast.
"Well, they're useful, that's for sure!" Senom said cheerfully. "Also, in the next few minutes, we'll leave you guys alone to get some planning done. Get to know each other or something." Senom dragged Myna off into the woods towards the base of operations for hosts.
Ceris leaned back. "Ooooooh boy, we're REALLY screwed now..."
"Y'think?"
Sayble twirled a stick in one hand while holding the other over the fire for warmth. "So, here we begin this little fraction of hell, eh..."
X
With the Jumping Jellyfish...
Nolan sighed. He wandered over to his team in a state of pre-battle defeat. "You're Lilac, and you're... Ayna, right?"
"That would be correct." Lilac glanced over Nolan, taking into consideration what she could steal from her opponents—or in this case, her allies. "You need someone to exact revenge on someone for any reason, I'm your girl. If that person happens to be me, I'll most likely find a way out of whatever you pin down on me." She grinned. "Careful with your wallet, all I'll tell you."
Ayna slowly moved away from the Selkie girl. "You've got it right, emo buddy." She leaned in. "I can tell you're of our kind... but.. err... the metal flesh thing's a dead giveaway that you're not really angels..."
Nolan shifted uncomfortably. "Long story behind the metal flesh thing. Um, my name's Nolan. Please don't make me get rid of you. That's all I got." He muttered, sitting down and unzipping his dark hoodie. Islands were hot, he realized. "Are we gonna have any kind of strategy?"
Spencer wandered over. "Considering three of your robot-people are on the other team, I've got a good enough plan." He said with a little smirk. Razi came up and hit him over the head with a pout.
"You need to play fair, Inoue-dear~! How about we just gas them?"
"How is that FAIR?" Both Spencer and Nolan demanded.
Lilac glanced up in interest. "Cheating is a proud tradition that's in everyone's blood. Fairness doesn't exist, you know. As they say, life's not fair."
"Remind me why I thought coming here was a good plan?" Ayna muttered.
"Cause the authors forced us into it." Li replied. "Wish they hadn't taken my racket, could've kept that for special purposes..."
The angel girl scooted away from her.
More sparks came off of Spencers' fingers. Nolan stood up abruptly.
"Quit DOING that, we're not cheating and I don't want you messing around with any of our circuits!" He yelled. Spencer only laughed, rather amused by this. It was rare he came across full-on cyborgs.
Razi sighed. "Hmmm... maybe we could sabotage them someway else~ can we flood the cabins?"
"STOP TALKING ABOUT CHEATING!" Senom's voice blasted through the area. It seemed the authors knew where to find megaphones.
"SHUT UP!" Spencer yelled back. Myna made a mental note to make the first challenge especially difficult for him...
X
With the Carebear Clan...Keres sat down far away from Ceris and Xan. They're so annoying, she thought to herself, hoping they'd get eliminated first. "Great, what NOW?"
Malcolm leaned against a tree. "Well I suppose if you're Keres you could just complain all day." He muttered sarcastically.
X
With the insane authors Senom and Myna…
"How exactly are our cyborg angels gonna do in water?" Myna asked Senom all of a sudden with a worried look.
"Ummm... Oh, I know! We'll give em cosplay outfits! Heavy duty, full body, not metal... Where do you think Chris left the cosplay outfits? I think he mentioned some made of a crapload of bubblewrap in his tutorial notes..." Senom glanced around the makeshift 'base', which was really a tree house she and Myna had built in about ten minutes. Due to having author powers, however, they had made certain that it wouldn't fall apart and was slightly bigger on the inside than it should have been.
... it also had electricity and running water.
"Hmm..." Myna poked through the treehouse. "I was more referring to their electrical and metal circuits? I mean can they get wet?" she asked with a small frown.
"Get wet? Yes. Although with the metal covering, hopefully they'll only start to rust. The bubblewrap'll protect em though, we'll be fine..." Senom threw open the doors to a random closet and moved aside all the normal outfits. "Bubblewrap, bubblewrap... Here we are!" She held out a full-body suit of bubblewrap. "Four, right? He's got over twenty in there... Hmm. Maybe Chris almost decided to have mercy..."
"Rust?" Myna asked in disbelief. "They can't RUST! Ooooh wow... why's he got all this bubblewrap?" she asked worriedly. "Was he planning to bungee jump someone off the side of the island with nothing but that as protection?" Knowing Chris, though, that's EXACTLY what he'd do... she realized with wide eyes.
"Ooooh, write that one down, we should add that in as a challenge." Senom grinned. "Anyway, with these in tow, might as well show 'em to their cabins, right? I mean, before Sayble gets her dynamite somehow and blows them up..."
Back at the campfire, Sayble sneezed.
"Alright!" Myna vaulted from the treehouse, and came back over to the campers surprisingly uninjured. Damn authors. She found the two teams on different sides of the clearing, with Razi and Nolan arguing about something that seemed to involve nuclear weapons. "Um, okay you guys! Time to see the cabins!" she yelled in a chipper tone.
Senom lead the hike through the woods, constantly rousing complaints when she burst randomly into song.
"If she starts with Resonance one more time, I'm finding a tree branch. Thick one." Ayna muttered.
"Great idea, give her a concussion. You'll be off the show in five seconds." Ceris told her.
Sayble hung back around Spencer. "So, eh... how's the work been going, Inoue?"
Spencer shrugged. "Decent. More people each mission. Not as much trouble with Chance when I do that. You?" He asked, looking up at her.
"Egh. Don't remind me. Got chewed out by the Council as soon as I got back to the Shadow World." Sayble spat in disgust. "It's as if I wasn't a threat to my people before the whole Organization Rebels thing went down."
Senom sent a magical hand to go smack Sayble. "No fourth wall breaking unless you're in the confessional! Which reminds me, that's the outhouse if anyone's interested in whining to the viewers."
"Ahhh, well that kinda sucks. And here I was thinking they'd love you for 'protecting' them by exploding anyone against you." Spencer laughed wryly when suddenly Keres let out a bloodcurdling scream. "—god, what's the MATTER with he—"
"LOOK!" The girl shrieked, pointing angrily at the cabins they were supposed to stay in. Or really, trailers. If they could even be called that, because one was so worn-down it lacked an entire side, the rooms just visible to the entire left half of the camp. Blankets were billowing in the wind. There was graffiti all over the second trailer and it was so dirty it was more brown than white.
Myna giggled, enjoying Keres' pain the way Keres enjoyed the pain of others. "Now this will be a lot of fun, won't it you guys? WELCOME TO CAMP WAWANAKWA!"
The stunned silence from the campers was a reply in itself.
X
Hope it's not too confusing. If y'got this far, go ahead and review, and let us know which character you think should be eliminated first! xD
-Myna and Senom
