Title: Conversations in a Park
Author: Fallenbelle
Rating: K+
Summary: "Julia, you'd allow our daughter to play as she wished wouldn't you? I mean, if we had one that is, well…," he trailed off, looking at her nervously.
Spoilers/Setting: Takes place sometime after 815-Shipwrecked. Mild spoilers for that episode and general season 8 knowledge.
Notes: I wanted to write a silly, fluffy fic that was a Murdochian take on #TheDress. Apparently, my mind is a strange place, because this is what happened instead. I'm starting to suspect that William's biological clock is ticking rather loudly, and this is my attempt to reconcile that with the distance we've seen between the couple for most of this season.
It was a lovely late autumn day, bright and sunny, yet there was a clean crispness to the air, and the trees were resplendent in their autumnal hues. It was a lovely afternoon to be at the park, and the Station House #4 fall picnic was in full swing. Wives, sweethearts, and children were all present, save for Julia, who would be arriving later from the asylum after she had checked in with her patients.
Content to merely observe, (and hopefully avoid being dragged into another sporting contest of dubious merit) William had offered to watch Constable Jones' young twins while their mother helped ready the meal that would soon be served.
Approximately 3 years old, and comprised of one girl and boy, not for the first time, William wished that such beautiful children were his.
He'd never admit it to anyone, but secretly, he longed for a son to whom he could be the father that he never had, a boy with whom he could enjoy the same sort of father-son activities that the Inspector enjoyed with his sons. He also wanted a daughter that looked like Julia, a little girl with her mother's laugh and golden curls. A little girl he would dote upon and cherish, while encouraging her to assume her rightful place in the world beside her brother. Physical, tangible representations of the love he and Julia shared-part him, part her.
However, he chided himself for these foolish thoughts and dreams, as they would never happen-they simply weren't meant to be.
He'd had the choice of Julia or biological children, and the decision had been easy-he wanted Julia by his side for the rest of his life-children of their own or adopted a mere detail. He would never trade Julia for another woman who could bear his natural children; rather he'd longed for an equal and a life-partner, someone to share all aspects of his life with, rather than simply a domestic servant with sexual benefits. He had that ideal relationship with Julia, and if biological children were the concession he had to make, then he made it happily.
Still, William nonetheless envied Constable Jones his beautiful children, who were happily getting themselves and one another quite dirty playing in the dirt. The little boy at that moment chose to dump a pail of dirt on his sister, who instead of fussing over her pretty dress getting dirty, instead giggled, throwing a handful of dirt right back at her brother. William laughed at their antics, envying the children their freedom to play without concerning themselves of propriety.
Or so he thought. At that moment, Mrs. Jones rushed over and scolded the little girl for getting dirty-as opposed to the boy who had actually been the one to pour dirt on his sister. Something about she should know better than to play like a little boy when there were girls and her dolls to play with-while scowling at William for allowing such a thing to happen.
Not for the first time William realized that the world held a double standard for females-Julia had taught him to see that. It wasn't fair, and he pitied the little girl for already having her freedom curtailed far earlier than her brother.
Doing his best not to roll his eyes at Mrs. Jones, he turned around, sensing someone behind him. It was Julia! Kissing her in greeting, he noticed that she looked rather fetching in a new white and gold dress that fit her beautifully. Not for the first, or even the last time, he was very glad that she was his wife. Now that they were married, he got to enjoy benefits like the privilege of removing said dress-something he was beginning to look forward to doing later that evening.
"Hello Mrs. Murdoch. You look most lovely as usual." William said before kissing her again, hands around her waist. He didn't care who could see his inappropriate actions-he couldn't help himself where she was concerned.
"Good Afternoon, Mr. Murdoch. I see you've been a most unsuitable chaperone for young Miss Jones, allowing her to play in a most scandalous and unacceptable manner," Julia mock scolded him in a whisper while taking his arm and leading him away from Mrs. Jones as she hurriedly cleaned up the little girl, scowl still firmly in place.
"Julia, you'd allow our daughter to play as she wished wouldn't you? I mean, if we had one that is, well…," he trailed off, looking at her nervously.
"That depends, William. Are you going to want to dress her in such a manner-making her a doll as opposed to a child?" Julia asked.
"Well, I suppose that I might want to dress her like a doll-it's just too pretty. But, I suppose we could agree not to fuss at her when she got dirty-at least no more than we would for her brother."
"My, my. Is that a man speaking out in favor of equality between the sexes?"
"Julia…" William looked at her pointedly.
"Relax, William, I'm having fun with you. I know you're in favor of equality-I wouldn't have married a man who thought himself superior to me."
"If anything, I married a woman superior to me. You're amazing, Julia you're…" William began.
"No, my husband is amazing, and accomplishes the greatest feats with remarkable ease," Julia interrupted.
Continuing their walk around the park, William's thoughts drifted back to children-a topic never far from his mind these days. After Julia, it was what he wanted most, and the logical next step in their relationship. But, they'd agreed to wait until their first anniversary before beginning the adoption process; this way they would have ample opportunity to get to know one another before assuming responsibility for another person. Plus, Julia's commitments to the campaign would be finished by then as well, and Julia would have more free time again.
At least that had been the discussion before the wedding. William had been somewhat reluctant to wait (he'd wanted kids right away), but he had to admit that taking the time to get to know one another as husband and wife and establishing their own traditions and routines had definitely been for the best. It was a reasonable request that made perfect sense, and William was enjoying getting to know his wife, but still, he looked forward to a time when he could enjoy a family with Julia.
He was ready to be a father. Turning to look at Julia, he couldn't help but think of what a wonderful mother she'd be-that is, if she even still wanted children. But, what if she'd changed her mind? He stopped and looked at her quizzically, noticing something new about her dress as well as her silence.
The dress now appeared to be black and blue, and he could have sworn that the dress had been white and gold when he'd first noticed it earlier. He furrowed his brow in confusion.
"Julia?" he asked.
Smiling, she cupped his cheek with her gloved palm, and traced the contours of his brow ridge with her thumb, smoothing out the puzzlement. She thought his expression was conveying concern, when in reality, he was just puzzled as to what the actual color of the dress was.
"William," she began, "I know you're ready for children, but I still want my husband for myself. I'm not ready to share him just yet-not even with my own child. I hope you understand that I want to be selfish for a bit longer, and that I'm not saying never, just not now," she assured him. "I look forward to raising a family with you, William Murdoch."
"I'm fine with waiting a while longer, and I must admit, that I'm somewhat pleased that you're still selfish in regards to me, but I'm also getting old enough to know that I can't really put it off much longer," William finished.
"Oh?" Julia countered.
"Yes, something Father Keegan said to me; something about young children and old men being a tiring equation. I'm not a young man anymore, Julia. He has a point. I just don't want to wait too long."
"Are you telling me you're old, Detective? Because I'm certain that you've been doing a most admirable job of keeping me up entirely too late each night, demonstrating your affections to me most convincingly," she countered, with one eyebrow suggestively raised while her hand stroked his bicep before giving it a squeeze. All of a sudden, she found herself anxiously awaiting the return to their suite so she could admire those biceps sans clothing.
Grabbing her around the waist and pulling her towards him, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in for another kiss. "Let's just say that I need to be young enough to appease my wife as well as keep up with a child, Julia."
"Indeed you do, William. An excellent point," she conceded with a laugh. "Additionally, as enjoyable as it has been, I'm not sure that our suite is the best place to raise a child, and as you haven't started building a house yet either, I don't suppose that we could start looking for a house now, so that we have a suitable place ready to bring our child home to? You could always make changes and improvements to it as your schedule allows," Julia countered.
"I've been thinking about that Julia, and you're right-between you and work and possibly a baby, I won't have time to build the house you deserve. But, I suspect you know the real reason why I wanted to build you a house in the first place, and that I needed time to come to terms with my new financial situation," William replied.
"Have you accepted that it's our money now, William?"
"I have. It's time to look at houses in which we're going to raise our family, Julia. The suite has been a wonderful experience, but it's time to start new memories."
"I'm glad that you see it that way, William. I'll contact a real estate broker Monday about finding some suitable houses for us to look at."
"Very good. But remember that we don't want our bedroom to be too close to theirs. I'd hate to wake the poor child with our nocturnal activities," he reminded her, pulling her in for yet another kiss before propriety demanded that they'd been scandalous enough for one afternoon. He pulled back and offered his arm, which she readily accepted, resuming their walk.
Besides, he had all the time he wanted later this evening to remover her fetching dress, which now seemed to appear purple and bronze in direct sunlight. He shook his head and blinked, as though he were trying to clear his mind and his senses. His normally reliable eyesight couldn't identify the color of the dress, and he wondered if he wasn't getting too old.
As they rounded a corner on the path, they ran into George and Edna, out on their own romantic stroll around the park.
"Good Afternoon, George. Mrs. Brooks. Fine day for a stroll, is it not?" William asked in greeting.
"It is indeed." George replied. "Detective, I hope you'll forgive me, but Dr. Ogden, I can't help but note that the color of that dress is most suited to you. I've always thought that particular shade of greeninsh blue -turquoise I believe it's called- with brown has always been a wonderful color combination. I don't understand why one doesn't see that pairing more often."
"Indeed, Constable. I saw it and knew I immediately had to have it at once. I've always been partial to the combination myself," Julia replied.
Wait, George and Julia thought the dress was turquoise and brown? William became even more concerned.
Perhaps he needed to sit down and rest; maybe he was aging quicker than he thought.
