Arthur Dent shifted the object in his left hand to his right hand. "Ford?
The improbability drive is off, right?"
Once again, Ford was reminded of human beings' curious tendency to state the obvious. "Yes. Everything is off, you dope. Probably Zaphod's fault somehow. Why do you ask?"
"Only because this book just appeared in my hands a minute ago, and I started reading it. How improbable is that?"
Ford paused thinking. Five minutes later, Trillian waved a piece of paper from a corner seat with numerous scribbles on it. "1,890,754,071 to one."
"Hmm. Well, it's about this baby who destroys this rather evil wizard all by himself, and becomes famous. See?" He held a beaten up copy of a book titled "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone".
Ford snorted. "C'mon, Arthur, that could never happen. You know babies have no motivation at all. Why, I can barely think of something more improbable happening."
The hum of the computer suddenly started up, and Zaphod appeared. The computer's screen lit merrily, and it began to rapidly break the silence of the ship. "Hi there, guys! It's really great to be back with you again, I can tell you, and I want to say that."*
Suddenly, a boy dropped onto the computer's keyboard, completely interrupting what it was going to say next. He had messy black hair, bright green eyes and a rather nasty looking scar on his forehead. He stared around at the spaceship, passing over Zaphod and then going for a second look. After a second he shrugged him off and slid to the ground. "Hey, where am I?" he said, his voice cracking a bit.
"Probability 120,207,038,895,891 to one," the computer supplied helpfully, once the boy had climbed off of it.
Arthur's expert ears quickly picked up on the boy's voice, and smiled broadly at the boy, which gave the boy the adverse effect of shrinking back a bit. "You wouldn't happen to have any tea with you, possibly?"
The boy checked quickly in his pockets. "Not at the moment, no."
"Damn," Arthur whispered sadly, and walked out the door.
"It was a pleasure opening for you!" the door shouted. Arthur kicked the doorframe with his shoe before continuing away.
Trillian, Ford and Zaphod left the room, yelling at the door on the way. Marvin sat in a corner and wearily shut himself off. Harry Potter was confused.
"Probability of 8 to one," the computer added cheerily.
Fin.
* Pg 89 of "Life, the Universe and Everything."
Once again, Ford was reminded of human beings' curious tendency to state the obvious. "Yes. Everything is off, you dope. Probably Zaphod's fault somehow. Why do you ask?"
"Only because this book just appeared in my hands a minute ago, and I started reading it. How improbable is that?"
Ford paused thinking. Five minutes later, Trillian waved a piece of paper from a corner seat with numerous scribbles on it. "1,890,754,071 to one."
"Hmm. Well, it's about this baby who destroys this rather evil wizard all by himself, and becomes famous. See?" He held a beaten up copy of a book titled "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone".
Ford snorted. "C'mon, Arthur, that could never happen. You know babies have no motivation at all. Why, I can barely think of something more improbable happening."
The hum of the computer suddenly started up, and Zaphod appeared. The computer's screen lit merrily, and it began to rapidly break the silence of the ship. "Hi there, guys! It's really great to be back with you again, I can tell you, and I want to say that."*
Suddenly, a boy dropped onto the computer's keyboard, completely interrupting what it was going to say next. He had messy black hair, bright green eyes and a rather nasty looking scar on his forehead. He stared around at the spaceship, passing over Zaphod and then going for a second look. After a second he shrugged him off and slid to the ground. "Hey, where am I?" he said, his voice cracking a bit.
"Probability 120,207,038,895,891 to one," the computer supplied helpfully, once the boy had climbed off of it.
Arthur's expert ears quickly picked up on the boy's voice, and smiled broadly at the boy, which gave the boy the adverse effect of shrinking back a bit. "You wouldn't happen to have any tea with you, possibly?"
The boy checked quickly in his pockets. "Not at the moment, no."
"Damn," Arthur whispered sadly, and walked out the door.
"It was a pleasure opening for you!" the door shouted. Arthur kicked the doorframe with his shoe before continuing away.
Trillian, Ford and Zaphod left the room, yelling at the door on the way. Marvin sat in a corner and wearily shut himself off. Harry Potter was confused.
"Probability of 8 to one," the computer added cheerily.
Fin.
* Pg 89 of "Life, the Universe and Everything."
