(Author's note: Hello, everyone. Welcome to the first, and quite possibly last, Circe and Hype adventure. I'm Circe and my boyfriend is Hype. The two of us wrote this story while we were bored on a flight to the east coast. That's why it may seem a little disjointed at times. We were just writing a paragraph and then handing the notebook back to the other person to continue. As you can see the two of us are extremely frustrated with the current state of identity politics. Or maybe just I was. Absolutely nothing in this story is meant to be taken seriously and everything is in jest. Also, in case anyone was wondering; yes, I am a black woman and my boyfriend is a nebbish white Jewish man. Yes my great grandma is Puerto Rican. And no; Circe and Hype are not our real names. I hope you enjoy the story! Side note: If you don't know what 'POC' means, bless you and keep doing what you're doing in life because, speaking as a black woman , I despise this term. It means 'person of color.')

Aboard a flight to a non-descript destination, there were two people: Circe and Hype. Circe was an attractive Black woman, while Hype was an adorkable Jewish man. They were the only two "real" people on this flight. The rest were all animated characters.

However...

In the back of the plane sat the characters that were either POC or coded POC. But in the front of the plane, there were only white characters. The only white person in the back was Hype. Very few passengers aboard this flight were aware of this questionable seating arrangement and no one knew whether it was intentional or not.

Hype looked around. "Huh.." he murmured to himself, "well, whatever." He turned to Circe and gave a sheepish grin. She smiled at him in a playfully wicked manner. Hype gulped. He could never quite tell what she thinking.

"Hype," Circe said, "you're the only white person back here." Hype glanced around warily. "We might kill you, Hype!" she added, deviously.

Hype rolled his eyes, knowing she was joking. Still in the back of his head he was a little nervous. "I'm sure it's just a weird coincidence," he assured her (but mostly himself).

"Suuuuuure, it is," Circe replied, winking at the camera, murdering the fourth wall dead.

Meanwhile, Br'er Rabbit hopped up and down the aisle of the non-white section of the plane, singing his signature 'Laughing Place' ditty, even though the seatbelt sign was on. Little did he know that Br'er Fox and Br'er Bear were also present on this flight. They were two seats across from Circe and Hype. Br'er Fox spotted Br'er Rabbit as he gamboled free as a canary bird.

"I don' know much 'bout dat airline food what dem comedians is allus talkin' 'bout," Br'er Fox whispered, none too quiet-like, to Br'er Bear. 'But I wants dat Br'er Rabbit!"

Br'er Bear nodded hungrily.

"And some peanuts," said Br'er Bear, "I loves me some big ol' goobers!"

Moana and Maui were sitting near the wing of the plane. Maui took up two seats. Moana wondered if she would ever see her beloved Morty again. She didn't tell him that she was flying, far, far away. Coincidentally Morty didn't tell her that, either. But they didn't know that they were on the same flight because Morty was in coach with Rick and all the other white people.

Morty looked sadly out the window. Rick took notice, "You miss your giRRRLLfriend, huh?" belched Rick, "Y-You-You miss your chocolate water goddess girlfriend?"

"Oh my god, Rick. She's not a goddess. She-She- I mean, she is to me, but..."

"Jesus Christ, Morty. You're such a fucking pushover."

Back in the non-white section of the plane Circe and Hype were taken by surprise by an oddly familiar voice.

"HiCirce!HiHype!Wow!Ican'tbelieveIwasluckyenoughtogetthesameflightasyouguys!"

Circe turned around. In the seat behind her was Nawt. (Monstar version.) "Oh hi, Nawt!" Circe smiled broadly.

The two began to chat it up as Hype sat there bemoaning the facts that a) he'd have to sit there and listen to Nawts endless regurgitation of dialogue and b) he knew that Circe was attracted to Nawt and, thus, stealing Hype's 'thunda'.

'Why couldn't it have been Blanko?' Hype thought. Circe feels nothing for Blanko. 'But nooooo, it had to be the red gremlin guy. I swear...'

At least all Circe and Nawt did was talk about sports.

Br'er Rabbit eventually got tired of hopping around everywhere. He turned to the entire section of the plane and shouted, "Come on bruthas and sistas! Let's sing a rousin' air travelin' song!" Then he began leading everyone in the song "Chain Gang" by Sam Cooke. It had nothing to do with flying. But, by god, everyone was into it. The entire half cabin swayed in time as they exploded;

"THAT'S THE SOUND OF MEN, WORKIN' ON THE CHAIN...

GAAAAANG!

THAT'S THE SOUND OF THE MEN WORKING ON THE CHAIN...

GANG! ALL DAY LONG THEY SINGIN'...

HUH!... AH!... HUH!... AH!

ALL DAY LONG THEY WORK SO HARD

'TILL THE SUN IS GOIN' DOOOOOWN.

WORKIN' ON THE HIGHWAYS AND BYWAYS AND WEARING

WEARING A FROWN!

YOU HEAR THEM MOANIN' THEIR LIVES AWAY!

AND THEN YOU HEAR SOMEBODY SAY..."

Everyone was swaying and singing...that is, except for Hype. He was afraid that if he did sing along, he'd get in trouble. What if this was a 'POC' only thing? "Come on Hype, join in!" Circe coaxed.

So Hype did. He wasn't bad at it for a white guy.

"THAT'S THE SOUND OF MEN, WORKIN' ON THE CHAIN...

GAAAAANG!

THAT'S THE SOUND OF THE MEN WORKING ON THE CHAIN...

GANG! CAN'T YOU HEAR THEM SAYIN'...?

HUH!... AH!... HUH!... AH!

I'M GOING HOME ONE OF THESE DAYS!

I'M GOING HOME TO SEE MY WOMAN,

WHOM I LOVE SO DEAR, BUT MEANWHILE

I GOT TO WORK RIGHT HEEEEEEEERE!"

Br'er Rabbit noticed that the front half of the plane wasn't singing. He hopped over and stopped when he noticed how very, very white everyone was.

"Doctor King didn't die fo' dis!" shouted the angry rabbit.

"He didn't die for a lot of things," Rick shouted back "but shit happens."

A few moments before the exchange took place, Rapunzel who was sitting in the white people section with Eugene and her cousins Anna and Elsa heard the hearty and enthusiastic singing coming from the back portion of the cabin. "Do you hear that?" She asked them and got up from her seat and starting toward the singing. "I wanna sing too."

But a flight attendant stopped her, "Sorry miss, but I can't allow you back there."

"Why not?" Rapunzel pouted. Just then Br'er Rabbit hopped into coach shouting something about Doctor King. "Oh," Rapunzel thought, "that's why..."

"Ya'll bettah check yo' privileges!" Brer Rabbit contrived angrily, '''cause allus POC's is in dah back here!"

Hearing this in the back, Plugsy the lamp said, "Wait, I'm black? I thought I was a mobster."

"Apparently not," said Circe.

Nawt looked up, "What?"

"No, not apparently 'Nawt'. Apparently not."

"Again, what?"

Circe rolled her eyes and smiled, 'Oh, that Nawt. All muscle no brains,' she thought.

"Aww," cooed Rapunzel, "What a cute little bunny!" She picked up Br'er Rabbit and snuggled him tightly, completely derailing his rageful speech.

Morty was getting uncomfortable, "R-Rick this weird. I wish Moana was here."

"Yeah, so you can join the mile high club, right?"

"Aw, geez, the-uh-the thought c-crossed my mind."

Br'er Rabbit meanwhile was not sure what to think at this point. On one hand, white devils. On the other, hot chick.

The flight staff was becoming antsy as well. They didn't want it in the news that one of their flights was racially segregated. The same attendant that stopped Rapunzel earlier rushed to the back of the cabin to find a white person. The occupants there were still singing but they had moved on to "Miss New Booty" by Bubba Sparxxx. People were twerking and rolling down the aisle, chanting;

"BOOTY, BOOTY, BOOTY, BOOTY, ROCKIN' EVERYWHERE!"

But one person wasn't singing: Hype.

The flight attendant hustled over to him as fast as he could.

"Excuse me," he said to Circe, "may I please borrow your white boy?"

"Why of course you can!" Circe waved it off, "A good white boy can be so hard to find, these days."

The attendant thanked her and yanked Hype out of his seat.

"See," the attendant cried, displaying Hype to the upper half of the plane. "Look how white this guy is! He was in the back!"

"A race traitor," called Rick who really felt like shaking things up, "An Uncle Cornelius!"

"Why 'Cornelius'?" asked Morty.

"Cause there's no whiter name than that."

Rapunzel, Anna and Elsa's eyes lit up when they saw Hype. "Hi, there," Elsa purred hungrily eyes set on him like a cat looks at a mouse. The trio wasted no time. Elsa grabbed Hype and hauled him away toward the very back of the plane, Anna and Rapunzel following her.

They went past Circe's seat, "Hey, Hype," she asked innocently, "How was the milk toast section?"

"Mmmmmph!" Hype answered from behind Elsa's firm hand.

"OK, have fun takin' a shit with the princesses," she sang after them after all four stuffed themselves into the plane restroom. Circe continued to sing song happily.

While the princesses ravished Hype in the bathroom, Br'er Rabbit returned to the back of the plane and told everybody what he'd seen.

"I deserve better than this," cried Plugsy.

"We all do," agreed Moana.

Nawt raised his hand, "Let'schallangethemalltoabasketballgame!Teach'emalesson."

"Now, hang on, hang on, everybody. Let's all keep our composure." Circe stood up. There would be no race wars while she was around. "Didn't ya see Hype pass through here just a second ago with three white girls?" She paused for effect. "They're totes fucking in the bathroom, right now." Everyone murmured. "Make love not war! That's not to say that we shouldn't all start banging each other. But maybe we should integrate ourselves."

"Ya mean I gotta bang a white sloth?" Sid's grandmother asked.

"Bang whatever sloth you want, with consent," smiled Circe. "I'm going to join my boyfriend in that sweet orgy, MILE HIIIIIIGH!"

Circe's cheer caught Morty's ear. He really wanted Moana right now.

Before Circe could make it to the bathroom, Br'er Fox trapped her in the aisle. "Oh, no you don't," he said, "you're stayin' right here with me." His sharp toothed smile gleamed at her.

"But-" she began, but Br'er Fox had already gagged her. He sat in her seat, tied a gag around her mouth and her hands behind her back. Br'er Fox removed all clothing on her lower half. He sat Circe in his lap facing him and bobbed her up and down in his lap. "Aaaaw, yeah," he exclaimed.

Moana knew the bathroom was occupied so she got up to use the bathroom at the front of the plane. She slipped past Morty's seat but she didn't notice him.

Morty's eyes lit up upon seeing Moana. He dashed after her and hugged her from behind. Surprised, Moana threw Morty over her shoulder and into the pilot's room.

"Morty," she cried, "I'm so sorry, I didn't realize-"

But Morty was looking ahead in shock. There was no pilot. Only a computer. "Aw, geez. It's an auto pilot!"

"I am TEC," buzzed the computer, "I am the perfect pilot."

Back in the POC section, Circe was enjoying herself, but was a bit worried none of the sex sessions aboard were bi-racial (as far as white people and POC go). Luckily, Br'er Fox was done pretty fast. She hobbled, still tied up and pants-less, to the bathroom door. She knocked with her forehead. (Ow.)

Anna opened the door, yanked her in and handed her to Elsa. "Knock yourself out, Sis," she encouraged Elsa.

In the cockpit Moana questioned TEC, "You're perfect!? Have you seen what's been going on on this flight? It's out of control!"

"It's an appropriate level of crazy, I assure you," TEC replied calmly.

Rick bursted in, curious about Morty. "You two better not be- Holy shit, TEC! You're infected by an SJW virus!"

By this time, Kida had found and hand gagged Milo and was holding him hostage from behind. Aurora was being courted by the monstar, Bang (their personalities were so bland, they were perfectly matched). Esmeralda sensually devoured a thick, perspiring pickle while maintaining eye contact with Donatello.

Nick Wilde approached Judy Hopps from behind, undoing his belt buckle as he went. But Br'er Rabbit smacked into him, pushing Nick out of the way. This, of course, lead them to having a fist fight, complete with Br'er Rabbit shouting, "City booooooy, city booooooy!" at Nick.

Judy simply continued watching her in-flight movie, (Who Framed Roger Rabbit) completely unaware of the other rabbit and fox fighting over her.

"Listen, carrot muncher," whispered Nick, "She's mine. I've had the adventure of a lifetime with her. You think you can bust a perp with the goddess of bug butts? Nope."

"The only carrot she'll be muchin'," shot back Br'er Rabbit, "is mine."

"I will toss you into the briar patch so hard," Nick snarled.

"Bring it."

'That Roger Rabbit is so hot,' Judy thought to herself as she continued her movie.

"SJW virus," Moana asked still in the cockpit with Rick and Morty, "what the heck does that mean?"

"An SJW virus in basic English," explained Rick, "is a condition computers get when they believe all races are equal, but some races are more equal than others. It's George Orwell shit."

"Orwell was white and evil," said TEC.

Moana had had enough craziness for one day. She braved the plane orgy to retrieve her oar, "Then let's bust this plane up good."

Elsa, Anna, Hype, Rapunzel and Circe all exited the bathroom kinda spent from the orgy. Little did they know, there was another even bigger orgy occurring on the rest of the plane.

In the orgy, Maui was having a menage with Ariel and Cinderella. Circe looked over to Hype. She wondered how long Hype could watch the sexual spectacle before getting squicked out.

Hype gulped, 'so much sex. So... much... sex.' It was sextastic, but it really was a little too much for his eyes. When Maui ejaculated his heavenly load on the princesses, Hype fainted. Some things were just too crazy for him. Moana ran by with her oar and tripped over him.

"Oh! Hype," Circe shouted at her boyfriend's unconscious body, "now, look what you've gone and done!" She helped princess Moana to her feet. "Thanks," Moana said. The two got a good look at one another. They remained silent as they took each other's appearance in. Both girls wondered if they were staring into a mirror.

Moana ran back to the cockpit, oar at the ready to destroy TEC, unbeknownst to the fact that doing so would crash the plane.

"Hype?" Circe asked. "Oh, yeah. He fainted." She held up his head in her lap and stroked his hair as she gleefully watched the orgy.

Hype opened his eyes, saw the sexcapades and promptly fainted again. Circe sighed.

Meanwhile in the cockpit, Moana raised her oar.

"What the hell," cried Rick "what are you dOOOing?"

"There's only one cure," said Moana, "and the prescription is an oar."

"We'll fucking drown if you do that," Rick shouted.

Moana flashed him a grin, "Let's just say I know a guy."

The orgy was getting around to finishing up when the plane tipped downward and began to make a nosedive. Everybody screamed and held tight.

"Hype," shouted Circe, covering him with her whole body, doing her best to make sure his (once again) unconscious body remained unharmed.

"Hold on, Morty," Moana demanded as she grasped Morty's skinny frame as tightly and securely to herself as she could.

"Wauuuuuugh," squealed Morty. With a mighty splash, they plunged into the sea. Before the plane began to sink, two differently sized eyes popped out of the water and gave it a once over.

"What have we here?" asked a sexy voice. The women swooned while the men looked confused. Tamatoa, glam as ever, had arrived. "Shiny plane... I'll be taking that."

The women all crowded to look out the windows to see Tamatoa. The men looked at each other, puzzled. Even Judy Hopps seemed interested in the gargantuan crustacean.

"See, Rick," asked Moana, "we're saved!"

Circe caressed Hype. She wished he were awake to see what was going on.

Hype's eyes blinked open. Tamatoa looked down at him. Hype glanced over to Circe who was enraptured. 'Aw, man. This is worse than Nawt,' Hype thought.

"Awright, ev'ryone," crooned Tamatoa, "on my back with yer shiny selves. Ladies first."

The inflatable slide was deployed from the side of the plane. Each female passenger slid down as gracefully as they could to the safety of Tamatoa's gold-encrusted shell.

"Wow," Judy said as she pressed her bunny nose against the glass window to get a better look at Tamatoa.

Nick Wilde and Br'er Rabbit glanced at each other, dumbfounded. They silently agreed that they couldn't understand what made the over sized crab so hot.

Elsa slid down the slide.

"Ooooh," Tamatoa grinned a jagged smile at her dress, "you're quite the looker, Miss...?"

"Queen Elsa of Arendelle," she responded with a regal curtsy, "I must thank you, sir crab, for saving us all."

'Please your majesty," insisted the giant decapod, "call me 'Tama'." The women swooned again much to the men's discomfort.

Circe slid down the slide and it gave her ass a major rub burn. "Dah, shit," she cursed," I left my pants and undies on the plane..." Before she could make to retrieve them Tamatoa scooped her up.

"Well, well, well, babe," he turned his claw around to get a better look at her, "you've certainly grown since you left me on my back on Lalotai."

His eyes swept over her. Not only her bare lower half, either.

"Oh, my," Circe blushed, "you must be mistaken, I'm not-"

"Mute that," Tamatoa whispered, gently placing the tip of his claw over her mouth, "It doesn't matter now."

Moana impatiently tapped her oar, "Tamatoa! That's not me, I'm me! Now stop flirting and help us get to shore, please!"

Tamatoa looked at the blushing Circe and then back to Moana. "Ooops," he chuckled, "I like this one. But you, Moana were never so enticed as the others."

"I've got Morty," said Moana, holding up Hype.

"Uh... wrong white nerd."

Circe began laughing behind the pressure of Tamatoa's claw.

Morty looked out the window, still inside the plane with the other guys. He wondered what was up.

"Jemaine Clement crab, Morty. He's out there tarkin' all the muff." Before Morty could ask what that meant, Rick spoke up again, "except for your chocolate water goddesses muff. LOOOks like she's immune."

Morty looked out the window again and saw Moana waving around a gangly white boy in a yellow T-shirt that wasn't him. He made that 'w' lipped face and decided that he should be the next dude outside.

He slid down the slide and got to the ocean princess. "Moana, are you ok? I-I-I-Is this crab bothering you? Or... or something?"

Moana smiled sweetly at him, "He was just being creepy to a girl he thought was me. I'm alright, Morty," she kissed him on the cheek.

"Creepy?" Tamatoa asked. "Perish the thought, babe." He dropped Circe in Hype's lap. "Now then... shall we be off?"

"Most of the men are still on the plane," Circe pointed out.

"Shall we be off?" Tamatoa repeated with a bit of urgency.

"Hey, crabcake," Maui emerged from the plane and jumped off the platform over the inflatable slide and stuck a perfect landing onto Tamatoa's shell, "you're getting us all back to safety, or else!"

"Yeah!" cried the men from inside the plane. They then all tried to pile themselves out the exit and fell down the slide. They roughly rolled in clumps of snarls and flailing limbs. The ladies laughed. Circe was glad that Moana had pulled Hype out first.

"Where do we go now?" Judy wondered aloud.

"Somewhere dryer than this," snarked Nick. Judy chuckled at Nick's deadpan joke, earning the fox a glare from Br'er Rabbit.

"I could drop all the men on a deserted island and take all you ladies on a romantic cruise," suggested Tamatoa. No one agreed.

"Look," said Rick, "I've got a pOOrtal gun and all I need to do is zap us all home. Easy solution. None of the is fart crab bullshit."

Tamatoa glared at Rick. "Have we met?" the crustacean asked.

"I don't wanna go home," Circe piped up before Rick could answer, "I wanna go on a vacation!" Everybody cheered their agreement.

"We could always head to Oceania," suggested Moana.

"NO!" Circe screamed. Everyone stared at her until she added, "Uh, I mean... why can't we go to Puerto Rico? I haven't seen my dear old great grandma in ages and who knows how much longer she has on this Earth?" Circe sniffed and wiped a tear away.

Circe's puppy dig eyes had an immediate effect on everyone, even Rick and Tamatoa.

"Puerto Rico," cheered Hype. Everyone began chanting, "Puerto Rico, Puerto Rico!"

Br'er Rabbit knew that this was his big chance. He put an arm around Judy. Seeing this, Nick also put an arm around Judy, who then backed away.

"OK, boys," she smiled politely, "look, the attention was fun and all, but I'll be honest. I'm not into either of you."

Nick and Br'er Rabbits jaw's hit the gold-encrusted ground. "Even after all we've been through, together?" whined Nick.

"Nick, you're my best friend and I like you a lot but not like that. I'm only attracted to other rabbits."

Br'er Rabbit's ears perked up at Judy's remark. "And Br'er Rabbit, I really hate to break it to you so bluntly but... I'm only into white rabbits."

"Oh," said Br'er Rabbit, "oh... oh... oh. Ohhh, so you've been assimilated by de system of inter-racial-rabbit-oppression-white-guilt-motherfuckin'-racist-nonsense-gender neutral-buzzword-codename-lollapalooza- cuturally appropriating- AAAAAAAAAHH!"

And then Br'er Rabbit exploded.

...not really, he just fainted.

Br'er Fox laughed, 'That was worth it," he thought.

Tamatoa began swimming off in the direction of the Carribbean. On his shiny back all of the white people and POC joined hands and began singing "Love Power" by Ziggy Marley.

"Love powa! (What kind of powa?)

A little love powa!

Stronga den de hurricane,

Gentle like summa rain!

WHOA-OH!"

They were in perfect multi-racial/multi-cultural harmony.

Circe could feel her black ass cheeks flapping in the sea breeze as Tamatoa swam off with them into the sunset.