Playing Doctors and Nurses
Disclaimer: I don't own Dr Who or any of its characters or trademarks etc. This work of fiction is written for entertainment. I do not intend to profit from this.
Warnings: Nightmares, general distress, implied eating disorder, implied depression, implied suicide thoughts. Probably set to increase in whumpness as the chapters go on...
Pairings: Rory/ Amy implied. Rory/ 11th Doctor friendship (though you can read into it as more if you want).
The timelords were a psychic race, try as he might avoid it but the Doctor felt all his companions emotions around him. Others too but it was easy to ignore a strangers pain. He knew exactly when his formers companions fell in love with him. Exactly when they felt in awe like he was a god...in both the amazed and later the frightened way. So he could feel Amy's joy and tiredness. Also her husbands complex mess of anger and guilt.
The Doctor didn't need to try read his mind. The thoughts came to him with ease.
I don't belong here. Not with the ever so amazing Doctor. Rory thought bitterly. If I could be less useless maybe...but what does a time travelling alien need with an ordinary nurse from Leadworth? I should join Amy so she doesn't ask too many questions.
Amy's laugh sounded close by and he put on a sheepish grin. Thats it Rory! Just look confused...maybe smile abit.
Amy takes the bait and grabs his hand pouting at him. Even upset Rory has to smile at her famous pout. She seems relieved "I was wondering about you! Beginning to look him most days. Not that you looked that bad...well come to bed" she says in a stern tone.
She is getting far too perceptive. Didn't think I looked as bad as him though. I swear his depressed at least. Not that he would tell us if he was. Rory thought as his wife pulled him away. Happy face. Happy face. For her. For your wife.
Doctor POV
I watch Rory struggle against his feelings as his wife...future wife or whatever it is in this time zone. Times funny like that. I get an idea. "Oh Mr Pond, care to join me for some tea before bed? I have something to show you."
He looks relieved. Almost thankful.
Amy lets go and shrugs "whatever you boys want to do, try not to wake me."
She trusts me too much. I just know one day it will kill her.
Rory joins me and we walk to the library. He doesn't hide his emotions in front of me. He knows better. Maybe even if I don't understand.
"So Rory, you have been feeling useless and don't even try deny it" I add giving him a stern look. "So I think I can help you" I say. For him and his future child. And myself.
He rolls his eyes at me "I know I have been off lately but I don't want to talk" he says sharply.
"You misunderstand me. If you want to talk I can listen...I'm actually surprisingly good at that if you can get me still that long" I say getting distracted. Back on point..."How would you like to become the first human expert on timelord biology?" I ask.
He looked shocked. "You'd trust me with that?" he asks.
I just grin back "Do you really think that a human nurse is useless in the universe? Humanoid creatures share some similar traits."
He just smiles back. A real honest smile. A feel a rush of determined joy. "Can we start now?"
I have given him his spark back. Amy will thank me later.
"I have some books you can read in your own time. Today is practical however." I throw a blank notebook and a pen at him. He manages to catch it and I see the determined bright eyes of his look back at me.
He silently wills me to continue.
Trying to relax I throw my jacket over the chair and announce "Basic biology. Lets start with hearts."
He doesn't seem surprised yet. "Amy told me you have two hearts" he says.
"Ahh but have you felt them?" I ask. He seems to hesitate. "Yes Pond you have permission and no its not even remotely sexual to touch another male in this context. Is there any better way to learn about me when I'm right here and out of harms way?" I say in reply to his unspoken thoughts.
He pauses again as if checking I'm certain but its only for a moment. His hands brush my shirt finding the location and settles. He seems calmer now. Nurse Rory I dub his new mood. "Amazing...same rhythm only two. How strong are they? I mean can one sorta compensate for the other?" he asks eagerly.
His nerves are gone now. "Err...can I touch your chest...I mean through your skin?" he says sheepishly.
I undo my shirt and that joins my jacket. His warm hands make me flinch slightly and I swallow nervously. "Yes I can live with one heart but its best avoided. For a few hours I'll be normal but more than a day and my healing is reduced. You never know when you need to heal fast or if healing slower will kill you" I explain.
Rory nods. Removing his hands he notices my slight trembling. "Are you nervous? Cold?"
"Its been a long time since I have been examined for want of a better word. Yes I'm slightly nervous" I respond. Rory looks guilty but I stop his thoughts. "I'm fine with this okay. Trust me when I say very little happens to me without my consent."
He seems placated.
"You might have noticed I have faster pulse than you" I start. "Quite normal."
He seems to understand. "Does that mean you can't have strong stimulants?"
I smile back "thats a smart boy! Yes over excitement of the hearts can be fatal. About half of what a human can handle is my limit. Double that and I'm pretty much dead".
He has his nurse face on again as feels my wrists. The human smiles softly.
"Now I have unique lungs...I can filter out most toxins without harm and I can not breath for hours safely. Not that it should come to that." I say.
He seems amazed "but same rate as a human right?"
I nod.
"What about toxins you can't handle? Or allergies?" he asks concerned.
"Well each timelord has personal ones but most human medicine is fatal. Aspirin will kill me. I've explained stimulants. Best be careful with depressants too. Bit more sensitive to that than most timelords were myself. So low level if at all. Human foods make me a bit sick too. Some not so much or not at all." I reply.
He looks in thought "but you heal faster right? Stronger immune system too?"
I nod.
He suddenly get a question "What about sleep and food?"
I tense up and he notices but waits for my response. "Sleep is not as needed. A few hours if in peak condition a night will do. Food is about the same as humans but we can survive longer without food so its not as bad to skip meals"
He glances at me warily "Skip?"
I hastily correct "forget. Yes I meant that..."I trail off.
Then he surprises me. With a boldness I don't expect he takes my hands and asks me in his calm nurse voice "So when was the last time you did either of those things?"
I don't know how to respond. Its too late to lie. My stunned look has given me away. "I ate a few days ago...well aside from tea and biscuits with you guys. I tried to sleep last night. I managed a few weeks ago without uh disturbance" I say nervously.
He doesn't look angry. Not even annoyed. He doesn't look at me like I'm a poor puppy that needs fixing.
Instead he looks relieved "well I'm glad you told me. Whats the issue with food? Lets start there okay?"
I try to look less stunned and more like the in control Doctor I am. "Most of the time I don't feel hungry. Its not the food. Sometimes I..." I have to stop. Am I really going to tell him this?
Concerned eyes lock with my scared ones and he squeezes my hands to reassure me. "I won't laugh or over react. I just want to help. You want to be helped right?"
Silly me. Of course I can tell him. "Don't make Amy worry right? Just between us. Some days I don't want to, even if my body wants to so badly"
Silence fills the room and I feel a warm human hug. Rory waits before responding. I look away before finishing the thought "Maybe if I just fade away, everyone will be okay" in a whisper. I notice how hard I'm shaking now yet Rory hasn't let go.
I can't look him in the eye. He grabs my shoulders and makes me look up. I can't hide the depth of my pain. "We will talk about that later" he announces "what about sleep?"
Another sore topic for me. "I try to sleep but I more often than not have disturbances. Nightmares. Always happened. I don't like sleeping very much. If I fall asleep by accident, I don't dream so much."
"How bad?" he asks softly.
I hesitate. Once again Rory just waits for me. I feel him pulling me into a chair and warm human arms around me.
"I scream loud enough to wake myself. The sheets are always so wet that I have to change them. I try get out of my dreams...nightmares but I usually can't. Its so vivid...so real." I stop suddenly. I can't stop shaking.
Rory pulls me closer and firmly holds me in a hug, supporting my weight. It takes some time before I can breath properly again and support my weight. He still waits till I am calm again. I feel wetness on my face...when did I start crying?
I relax and become aware of my surroundings. Tardis. Good. Safe.
The nurse looks more determined than ever. "If you want, I can try help you. Do you accept?"
I nod, not trusting my voice.
He looks satisfied "Are you okay now? I didn't realise the nightmares were so bad that you would react like that for just telling me they exist."
Concern laced his words and I tried to lie. "You've seen that before?"
He nods unhappily. "Its called shock. Usually a response to a severe experience or event. See it with loved ones all the time and in terminal patients that can't accept it. I noticed the signs yes but I didn't expect that bad."
I smile and let him check me over before relaxing himself. "Try sleep okay. Want me to stay with you?" he asks.
I don't want to move from his warm arms but he doesn't see yet how bad my nightmares are. I don't want to disturb him so against my better judgement I decline. He seems to assess me and I can tell he knows I am lying. But he lets me go and rejoins Amy who is probably asleep for now.
AN: As usual read and review. Next chapter up soon as I can in between Mea Culpa and My Gay Wedding...as well as my written Dr Who stuff that needs typing.
