"I don't get you," Alfred sullenly shook his head.

"Я тоже" Ivan shrugged, then chuckled, "Я не могу уследить за ходом ваших мыслей."

"I thought you were going to be a good person, but then you have to go and attack those countries."

"Это не значит, что я ошибаюсь," he added austerely.

"And there is no way that I can understand what you are saying," sighed Alfred. "Why can't you learn English?"

"Почему вы не можете выучить русский язык?"

"See? There you go again." he paused for a second, glaring at Ivan. "Commie."

"Ах, вы оскорблял меня." Ivan mockingly pouted.

"Are you making fun of me?"

"Конечно, нет."

"Нет? That's no, right?"

"Да."

"Gah! Speak English! You irritate me, you know? Like, a lot. You act like you are so superior. Oh look at me, I'm Russia! I'm so much better than America because I beat up other countries. La-dee-dah."

Ivan said nothing for a few seconds. He stared at Alfred, all the while Alfred anticipated a stream of angry Russian cursing or getting punched. Yeah, he was probably going to get punched. Alfred waited for the blow. Instead, Ivan began to laugh.

"What? What are you laughing at?"

"Я смеялся над тобой. Вы смешной, вы знаете?"

"This is why I hate you," Alfred growled.

"Вот почему я люблю тебя," Ivan smiled.