In the beginning, there was nothing. Then God created light, and synonymous with light was Jerovary.

Jerovary was God's first creation, and God was filled to the brim with lust over the nine pack and smooth skin of his perfect handicraft.

However, God was omniscient, and so accepted that life together with Jerovary was impossible and inhumane. Jerovary was still lonely however, and God wanted only to please his finest creation, with a flick of God's wrist, Jerovary felt a pulsing in his stomach. It was to be his father.

Jerovary's nine pack made way for the expansion of his bellybutton nine seconds later. He watched with mild interest as his father's bald head peeked out from the hole in his stomach. At the sight of the first ear, Jerovary had taken such a liking to his newborn father that at least one of his ovaries exploded.

As soon as his father was out of the womb, he was a fully grown and generously aged sex god, and Jerovary could not help but admire the wrinkles on his fingers and a round head that looked at him with love and experience.

His dad smiled at him, and his smile started widening. Jerovary was concerned, he would not wish harm to come to his father.

"omg dad wtf ar u all right?" His dad said nothing.

"omg wtf wtf omg." Jerovary continued.

Soon however, he noticed that his father was actually practising mitosis.

"wow gr8 biology knoladge dad"

"no prob son"

Jerovary examined the scene playing out before him, to notice that his father was in fact reproducing to create his mother. The family was together. God was present.

"jerovary come join us." His father had spoken, and Jerovary watched as his parents were now practising meiosis, and urged Jerovary to join them. To encourage him, his father approached his front and his mother teleported to the back, and started fingered his entrance, while his dad engaged his tongue around his winkie.

He was in bliss, for the full ten days, until everyone was impregnated. They all carried the child for a full two minutes until he came out like water, seeping from their cells and morphing together like the most ethereal of play doughs into...

Another Jerovary.

"omg wtf r u doin ur stealin my originial swag liek wtf"

Jerovary 2 could not speak. He was too scared from the glory of his original.

"u kno wha i'm just gon hang myself coz there is just no point". The original Jerovary spoke and followed it by actually hanging himself for real.

His parents weeped.

"guys it a-okey bcoz i can be ur new jerovary."

His parents could be happy again.

God was not present, because his timetable was busy making out with the original Jerovary's sweet nine pack up in heaven.