A/N: Hello there! It's been a long long time since my last long story, probably long enough for you to forget me altogether, but, here I am again, with this new summer story! Apparently, I can only write long stuff when I have holidays)

This is going to be dark, very dark sometimes, but I'll throw in a good fluffy scene here and there, because even after the fabulous finale, we, Chairleaders, still need it.
Consider the story to be more or less AU since 5.18 - Bart's still dead, Lily and Rufus are very much married and B/S have the most beautiful friendship ever. However, Blair has the Waldorf Designs, as I really really liked that idea.

I'd like to thank the amazing suspensegirl who did a hell of a job beta-reading this! She writes wonderful fanfiction too, so if you haven't seen it yet - go and check!

WARNING: This story is rated 'M' for a reason - it deals with quite mature subjects, along with some mature language.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own this, all rights to to the CW and Cecily von Ziegesar.

Enjoy reading and remember that this is done for entertainment purposes only and by no means is supposed to offend anybody.


"Mrs. Bass," he murmurs softly and she giggles lightly at the sound of her new name. "I love you."

He is smiling.

Not smirking, like Chuck Bass usually does, but smiling, genuinely, wholeheartedly, happily.
That wide, radiant smile of his that reaches his piercing deep brown eyes and makes her heart race.

"I love you too," she confesses, her voice thick with emotion.

It rings in his ears, the happiest sound in his universe.

The best one along with her light laughter.

They waltz through the ballroom, silent for a couple of minutes, just enjoying the rhythm of the dance and the way their bodies move in sync so well. It feels like they are made for each other, the way her petite figure fits perfectly into his arms, the way they perform the most difficult steps so easily. They twirl around and don't even notice when one dance ends and another one starts.

Because they are Chuck and Blair.

Blair and Chuck.

Married.

It's beautiful.

As they dance, Chuck watches Blair. To say that she is a beauty queen is to say nothing. She is ravishing, exquisite, heavenly gorgeous. Her chestnut curls bounce slightly, her delicate porcelain skin glows, her doe eyes glitter, and then, suddenly, she mouths "I love you" at him.

Her full red ruby lips are so tempting that he can't help himself but break the dancing pattern and pull her in for a kiss. It's sweet, soft and short, because their parents are watching, but nevertheless it takes his breath away and he doesn't notice how she stiffens for a split second when his body presses against hers and there is a strange tense feeling in her left breast.


It's two weeks later that he starts to worry.

He can't quite figure it out yet, but he knows that something is wrong.

She is different.

She doesn't look carnival grade happy like he expects her to anymore. It's not like she's unhappy though - it's their honeymoon and it's perfect. He just wishes she would be less tense.

"Hey, Beautiful, is there anything bothering you?" he asks her uneasily at dinner one night.

"Well, the lamb is a tad too dry, but I think I'll survive that," she chuckles lightly.

"No, Blair, seriously," he says softly, shifting his weight uncomfortably.

"With all the seriousness, Bass, everything is amazing, I'm wonderful. So stop sending me these worried looks!" She smiles brightly and turns her attention back to delicious lamb ribs cooked with rosemary and thyme.

He watches her for a moment and sighs – he won't be able to get anything out of her tonight.


They are back in Manhattan, and he forgets his worries for a couple of days – it just feels too good, being there, at home, with Blair. He cannot even start describing the fluttering warmth that is in his chest every time his secretary tells him that his wife is calling.

He is so happy and so proud of them.

They made it. They fixed all their mistakes; they overcame all their insecurities: the pressure of Gossip Girl, the scandal that Blair's divorce with Louis had evoked, the default that had threatened to destroy his business, her father's death…(the father is Harold, of course.)

It was a long and bumpy road for them, and sometimes they couldn't even see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But in the end, love made everything simple.

Because they are Chuck and Blair.

Blair and Chuck.

And one day, May 15 2017 to be precise, he felt that they were ready. That is when he dropped to one knee and proposed to her. That is why now, 12 month later, he calls her his wife.

It's beautiful.


Still, he cannot hide in their happy bubble forever. No matter how bad he wants to live in a fairytale.

The one she invented, the one she had shown him. He can't.

There is that tension in her shoulders that doesn't go away even afterhours of Thai massage, that flicker of thought in her deep amber eyes that sends chills up his spine when she is staring into the same spot on the wall for ten minutes before he calls her, that way she locks herself in the bathroom and stays completely quiet for half an hour – he can't see through the walls, but he doesn't need to in order to know that she's meticulously studying her mirror reflection. The whole thing is worsened by the bright sugary smile that appears on her face every time he asks her about her day.

He knows that she is not fine like she claims to be.

"Baby, is everything alright at the Waldorf Designs?" he murmurs into her ear a couple of minutes after she collapses on top of him with a mind-blowing orgasm. If he wants to find out the truth, he has to act when she is the most relaxed.

"Of course. Why?" she whispers back, slightly surprised by his choice of post coital talk.
"I can feel that something is wrong, Blair. Talk to me", he almost pleads, pressing his lips against the base of her neck tenderly. "Please."
"I'm okay, Chuck. I'm just a bit nervous about closing that deal on Monday. I don't like negotiating abroad - I don't really know why they couldn't come to New York", she admits defeated, running her hand through her chocolate brown curls slowly.
"I'm sorry I can't come to Paris with you", he sighs. "But you'll do perfect, I'm sure. You are Blair Bass, the strongest woman I've ever met, remember? You will win their hearts in a second," he muses reassuringly, hoping to ease her worries. He knows she hasn't told him all the truth, but nevertheless she's opened up a little and that's a good start.

Perhaps she really just has problems at work.


When he meets her at the airport a week later with a bouquet of peonies, she looks exhausted and strangely pale, and when he outstretches his hand to help her off the boarding ramp, she leans on him somewhat too much.

"Are you okay, Blair?" he asks instead of saying hello. Worried, he presses his hand against her forehead gently. Thankfully, it doesn't feel hot.

"Yes, Chuck", she smiles weakly. "I caught a stomach flu in Paris. I'm much better now, but not perfect yet," she explains as he leads her to the limo.

"Ohh, beautiful, I'm so sorry," he says, kissing her on the cheek tenderly.

When he helps her in the car, he once again notices that she's weaker the usual.

Not perfect yet.

The words run through his head.

Blair Bass (ex-Waldorf) confessing health problems?

She must be feeling really shitty. But a stomach flu is something they can overcome. That's for sure. They are Chuck and Blair. Blair and Chuck. They've seen worse.

"Let's get you home, to rest, then." He wraps his arms around her frame and then, all of a sudden, her shoulders start trembling slightly.

"Blair, what's wrong?" he panics as she breaks into a fit of sobs.

Her whole body is shaking.

Violently.

She doesn't answer, just tugs on the lapel of his jacket, buries her head in his chest. Lets the tears overpower her. She cries like she does only with Chuck or Serena, cries sincerely, honestly. It's not like shedding a tear when it's appropriate and awaited by the society. She wails ungracefully, she weeps, sobs wrenching her petite frame. It's bad.

But they'll sort it out.

It's just one more obstacle.

They can overcome it.

That's for sure.

He knows better than to ask what's wrong - something is, but he'll find out later. Tomorrow. When she's ready.

Right now, she needs him, needs him not to talk, but to hold her and be there. And so he folds her in his arms securely, rubbing soothing circles into her back and smoothing her hair until her breathing evens out and she falls asleep, run down, on his shoulder.


Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

Don't be shy and leave your lovely reviews!

xoxo :***