OK, this story makes no sense, but hopefully it makes you laugh and get scared at the same time.
Shaggy and his faithful dog Scooby-Doo were dashing at top speed away from the objects of their current fear, namely a werewolf that wanted to claw their heads off.
"S-scooby, why don't you go challenge that furball to a match? You're a dog, and you have claws, so go prove yourself!" Shaggy yelled. Shaggy had been running all his life, and his lungs had expanded to the point where he could yell and scream, and still have enough oxygen to run as fast as his legs would go.
Scooby gave his master a look of disgust. "Raggy, he's huge!" That was true enough; the werewolf likely had at least 40 pounds over Scooby. That aside, Shaggy had recently filed down Scooby's teeth and claws, like any good owner should. In hindsight, considering their profession, that may have been a huge mistake.
As the cowardly duo kept running, a loud rumbling noise ahead of them brought to their attention the fact that they were approaching a waterfall. In less than a minute, they would run right over it.
"Aw, man!" Shaggy complained. He and Scooby-Doo had the worst luck. Whenever they split up from the others, it was always them who found the monster, always them who ended up having to defend themselves when no one believed them, and always them who had to be the bait for one of Fred's overly-complicated plans.
"Scooby, you can swim, right?" Shaggy asked his dog. He honestly wasn't sure. Scooby-Doo's face scrunched up in concentration as he thought. Finally, he replied, "I can dog-paddle." Shaggy wasn't sure if Scooby was messing with him, but that would have to do.
With a final prayer, Shaggy picked up his dog, and jumped in the water with a cry of, "ZOINKS!" He had meant to say something more heroic, but panic caused his brain to shift gears.
With a splash, the two wimps found themselves in dark, murky water; the kind that every boy's mother would warn was unsanitary. Unfortunately, due to all the yelling and shrieking, the dirty water got inside Shaggy and Scooby's mouths.
The two sputtered as they treaded water, desperately hoping that there weren't any sharks in the water. On the cliff above them, the werewolf peered down, his yellow eyes like beacons in the dark. Feeling a bit braver now that there was some distance between them, Shaggy cupped his hands around his mouth to yell at the beast.
"Ha ha, you lose! I hear that werewolves can't swim, so I guess we'll be seeing you later. Or not!" The werewolf growled, and jumped off the cliff in a perfect diving pose. Shaggy and Scooby grabbed each other fearfully.
Luckily, as the brown wolf-creature was zooming towards the two, an almost invisible net suddenly tied around it. The werewolf snarled, and thrashed around, but it was no use. Fred, Daphne, and Velma could be seen high-fiving on the cliff.
"Scooby, Shaggy, great job! You did it! Thanks to you, we caught the mysterious wolf-man!" Shaggy didn't feel so proud, but at least this meant the Mystery Inc could have a dinner celebration.
About twelve minutes later, the whole gang met at the lighthouse near the cliff, with Shaggy only wearing a towel as his clothes dried near the fireplace. His teeth chattered from the cold, but he was used to his jaws doing that.
Velma was just winding down one of her long expositions. "With the clues we have gathered, I deduce that the wolf-man is actually old man Perkins!" With that, she ripped off the mask, and the withered old man inside scowled at everyone.
Shaggy tuned out the meddling kids routine. He had bigger concerns at the moment. Turning to Fred, the designated leader of the group, Shaggy asked, "So, like, why do we always have to be the bait?" Fred took it in stride.
"Because you're the fastest, of course, and I can't make the girls do it." Fred's answer was so annoyingly obvious, it hurt. Shaggy stomped out of the lighthouse, and got in the groovy psychedelic-colored van the gang used. He had hidden some Scooby-Snacks in the trunk, and some food would lift his mood.
Twenty minutes later, Fred drove the car towards the hotel they were staying at for the night, and Shaggy was sulking in the back, because it turned out that his Scooby-Snack stash had been eaten by the dog when Shaggy wasn't looking.
"Rorry, Raggy," Scooby whimpered, but Shaggy wasn't willing to forgive just yet. The downpour of rain that had suddenly begun a few minutes ago didn't help either, although it did perfectly capture Shaggy's current disposition.
"Here we are," Fred announced as he stopped the car. Daphne put down the handheld mirror she had been using to apply makeup to her face.
"The place looks pretty, uh, rustic," Daphne weakly complimented. Shaggy could see why she would have trouble saying something nice about it; the place looked more run-down than some of the "haunted" mansions the gang had visited.
"We're staying here?" Shaggy gulped. Fred nodded excitedly, and Shaggy grew suspicious.
"This place wouldn't happen to have a reputation for being….haunted, would it?" Shaggy asked. Hesitantly, Fred nodded. Shaggy's hair went all spiky, as it was apt to do at times, and the teenager fainted. Sighing, Fred slung the unconscious boy over his shoulder, and went inside.
When Shaggy woke up, he asked what day it was. Velma responded that it was October 31st, and Shaggy shot up like a lightning bolt.
Ever since he was a little kid, he always had the worst Halloweens! The single worst time was when he was around the age of fourteen, and his other dog, Scrappy, had been viciously killed by a serial dog killer. The killer had been caught, but Shaggy and Scooby-Doo had never been the same.
"Velma, tell Fred that I had to bounce. Halloween just isn't my scene." Velma looked at him strangely, and only then did Shaggy notice that Velma wasn't wearing her glasses.
"Uh, Velma, what happened to your glasses?" Shaggy asked, not sure he liked the look she was giving him. Velma fell to the wooden floor, and began to crawl towards him. Shaggy, who was plenty freaked out, jumped on his bed and scrunched himself against the wall.
Velma had started to grow horns, and her skin was chipping away like cheap paint. Her eyes were beginning to turn green, and Shaggy wondered if her need for glasses was that strong.
"Velma, listen, I have some contacts with me. Put them on!" and he threw the contacts in her eyes. Velma roared, and collapsed to the ground. Satisfied, Shaggy walked out the door, intending to find Fed and Daphne and explain to them what had happened.
Every step he took made the floor creak, and a plump rat even ran over Shaggy's foot. Shaggy yelped, and jumped on a chandelier. Unfortunately, his weight caused the chandelier to fall to the floor, where it crashed through the wood. Shaggy landed in the lobby, where a line of people had formed in front of the main desk.
"Dudes, something weird is happening at this hotel," Shaggy started, pausing when everyone in the lobby became deathly silent, and turned their heads to stare at Shaggy.
"My green shirt isn't that ugly," Shaggy muttered, running to the exit. Shaggy grabbed the golden handles to open the door, but it wouldn't open.
"I knew I should have taken that weight-lifting program," Shaggy huffed as he pulled on the door with all the might his skinny body had.
The people were starting to crowd around Shaggy, and no matter where he looked, there didn't seem to be any way out. Shaggy, deciding to man-up for once, punched one of the people in the face.
That person's head flew off. Shaggy paused, looked at his fist, looked back at the headless person, and screamed like a girl. As he screamed, everyone in the lobby began to wail an unearthly sound. It made Shaggy cold to the core of his being.
Shaggy put his hands over his ears, which didn't help to block the sounds at all, and ran for the stairs that led back to his room. He'd rather hang out with Velma than these weirdoes.
As he headed back to his room, he heard some soft music playing, and Daphne and Fred laughing. Opening the door to his room, Shaggy winced when his action made a loud creaking noise. Fred and Daphne were dancing around a glowing pumpkin, wearing only fig leaves.
"What the heck are you guys doing? That sure doesn't look like the boogie," Shaggy commented, flabbergasted. They didn't bother to answer, just started dancing faster. As Shaggy peered in to get a better look, he noticed that the pumpkin looked suspiciously like Velma's head.
As he leaned in, the pumpkin suddenly turned to face him, fire erupting from its carved mouth. Shaggy fell on his butt, but the spell had been ruined, and Fred and Daphne stopped dancing.
"We hunger," they said in unison. Shaggy was scared and insulted; hunger was his trademark. Suddenly losing his temper, Shaggy grabbed the flaming pumpkin and threw it at Daphne. The pumpkin hit her straight in the head, knocking her out. Fred, enraged, grabbed Shaggy with his suddenly black, gooey hands.
"What have you been touching?" Shaggy asked, feeling grossed out by the contact. Fred couldn't answer, as he was drooling some black liquid. He made a gurgling noise, like he was drowning, before collapsing, the black stuff coming out of his nose and eyes. Shaggy gagged at the sight.
He wished he had some Scooby-Snacks for bravery. As he wished for it, he noticed a box of the scrumptious snack on the dresser. Shaggy reached in the box, and stuffed some in his mouth. He chewed for a second, before spitting them out. They felt like they had been moving around in his mouth!
Shaggy looked in the box – and saw about two dozen cockroaches crawling around.
"That's it! I'm leaving this hotel, and I don't care who tells me not to leave!" With that, Shaggy jumped out the window. Luckily, he was on the first floor, so he only suffered grass stains on his already green shirt.
Shaggy, not seeing his jeep, ran into the nearby woods, which went against every fiber of his being. He didn't have a choice though; he just wanted to go home and watch some TV.
A few hours later, and Shaggy was forced to accept that he was lost. Being lost in a spooky forest ranked in his top ten scariest ways to die; number one for him was starvation.
An owl called to its mate somewhere in the trees, and Shaggy felt thankful that it wasn't a vulture. If he saw one, he would bolt.
A buzzing noise rang through the air, and Shaggy almost got a heart attack before he realized that it was his cell phone. Almost laughing at his own silly fear, Shaggy picked up. He heard heavy breathing, and Shaggy figured that it was some dirty phone line.
"Like, sorry man. I don't go for that stuff," Shaggy said apologetically. He knew that Daphne tried it, sometimes. The breathing got heavier and faster. Shaggy shook the phone to make sure that it wasn't damaged. The breathing on the phone stopped, and Shaggy listened closely, hoping the person would speak up.
The loudest scream Shaggy had ever heard rang from the phone, and Shaggy dropped it on the ground, startled. But the scream didn't stop; it now appeared to be coming from the trees. Shaggy couldn't see who was making the noise, as the sun had set long ago.
Shaggy tried to calm himself, but without his Scooby-Snacks, that was impossible. A warm gust of air hit the nape of Shaggy's neck, and the green-shirted teen felt goosebumps pop up along the length of his arm.
"Who's there?" Shaggy whispered. Someone giggled, and Shaggy felt himself sinking. Looking down, Shaggy only saw a thick black liquid.
"NOOOOOO!" Shaggy screamed as he went under and died.
Shaggy shot up in his bed, screaming. Fred, Daphne, and Velma all looked at him, concerned. Scooby was at the foot of his bed, and ran up to lick Shaggy.
"Shaggy, its ok. You must have had a nightmare," Daphne consoled, running a wet cloth over Shaggy's face.
"What the heck happened?" Shaggy asked, his voice drawling. Fred pat him on the back.
"You fainted after swallowing a bunch of that dirty water, and we brought you to this hotel to rest." Shaggy sighed, and lay back down on the soft pillow.
"Thank gosh!" Shaggy exclaimed to Scooby, who smiled knowingly. Shaggy was very happy to see that there was no black water in sight. He closed his eyes, waiting for sleep to claim him, and take him away to the land of sweets and sugar.
Just before he went out like a light, he felt something pierce his arm. Shaggy groaned as his head began to swim.
"Great, the drug seems to be working," Daphne cackled. Fred laughed too.
"He'll never know what hit him. This truly was his final Halloween."
