A/N: well, this was the story that started it all. The series, I mean. It started when my "twin" and I were fooling around and this idea came to us. "What if, we ate dinner with the Akatsuki?" we came up with some pretty wild ideas. Next day, when I got home from school I started this story, and it became "Dinner with the Akatsuki". I think it's about 1 or 2 years old right now, and it had to go through some pretty hard core editing before I decided to re-post it on and DA so... And now, I present to you-
Dinner with the Akatsuki
It was 8 o' clock at night and the infamous members of the Akatsuki were sitting around an oval shaped table quietly, picking at the various foods on their plates.
Konan sighed uncomfortably as she began, "So, Sasori... Work up an appetite after today's mission?" She picked at the salmon on her plate, Kisame glaring at her.
"I might have, but then again, I don't know. I can't feel hunger. I haven't any emotions," he said monotonously.
"S- sorry, um.. Zetsu, could you pass the carrots?"
"No." Replied both sides of Zetsu's face in unison. "What did the poor carrots do to deserve being eaten?" asked the white face.
Itachi and Zetsu then glared at each other, Zetsu ate Itachi's least favorite food, steak,and Itachi was eating Zetsu's least favorite food which is salad with cabbage.
"Zetsu, it is ridiculous to eat another living thing..." Itachi said, trailing off and taking a large bite of cabbage.
"Itachi, if it is so ridiculous to eat another living thing, why eat a plant? It's living too." Zetsu's white side remarked.
"And anyways, I would much rather eat some nice fish, preferably soup... But it's been hiding from me," The black face said, as both eyes turned to look at Kisame, who gulped nervously.
Tobi was happily munching at some sweets in a bowl, watching Deidara as Deidara had both of his hands in bowls of soup, and Deidara's face dropped in a bowl of noodles as the mouths on his hands and face ate their food.
Hidan was violently stabbing at his beef, while Kakuzu tried to steal some French fries from him when Hidan exclaimed angrily, "Oh damn, who cooked this crappy meat? It's freaking raw. Who the hell made it? It's ridiculous." He dropped an f- bomb but stopped once he got a cold glare from Kakuzu.
"I made it, and I only made it 'cuz I was paid," Kakuzu muttered dangerously low.
Pain sat at the head of the table, just watching everyone quietly, "Who's idea was this again? To all "eat" together?"
"Oh oh! Tobi knows Tobi knows!" Tobi cheered.
"Um... okay.. Tobi."
"Yeah... who's stupid idea was it to do this?" Kisame grumbled to Tobi.
"Mine." Tobi said, grinning as if this were the best idea in the world.
"Oh.. uh... Sorry?" Kisame began to rapidly eat the small can of shrimp on his plate. As Tobi continued to munch happily at his "dinner", which was really a bowl of sweets.
"Deidara, Deiadara, wanna see a new trick I can do?" Tobi asked excitedly.
"No un." Deidara replied flatly. "And that's Deidara- SAMA to you!"
Tobi ignored him as he threw into the air one of Deidara's bombs shaped as a cat. Deidara jumped up, catching the bomb before it dropped to the floor, he sighed in relief; then sat down into his chair again, meeting the whoopee cushion sitting on his seat.
PFFFT! The prank toy made its usual farting noise and the room went silent.
Tobi was the first to start laughing madly; then the rest of the group joined in.
Deidara blushed as he said, "Why you cheeky little-" he jumped out of his seat, Tobi also rushing up, as Deidara began to chase Tobi around the dining room. Deidara began to screech various threats like "Once I catch you, so help me, I will set a bomb to explode in your bedroom while you sleep 'un!" or, "Better watch out you brat, or you're gonna wake up one day under water 'un!"
"Tobi is a good boy! Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi yelled as well.
And so ends the uncomfortable dinner, and hope fully a better relationship between the Akatsuki members. Although... Pain doubted that anything good would come from Tobi and Deidara.
