"You know, if you're lonely, you can talk to me..." Alfred said, looking over at the boy with interest.
It came out more of a question, less of the empathetic voice he was looking for. He had been watching this curious boy for years upon years, months upon months, weeks upon weeks. He was a very quiet boy who didn't speak unless spoken to, and hardly lifted his head up unless to answer the teacher. And even that was seldom.
He jumped up from his book, staring at Alfred with shaky eyes. Alfred was taken aback- the boy, Kiku Honda, seemed so scared by such a suggestion. But why, he didn't know. Didn't everyone want to talk to friends about their problems? Questions that kept them up at night, dreams that caused them to toss and turn in their sleep, didn't they report it to their friends? Did... Did Kiku even have any?
Kiku had been in the majority of Alfred's classes for years. They both seemed fond of each other- and even more fond of badgering one another, silently one upping the other's actions- testing each other. Who would crack first? Who would talk to the other first? The tension between them couldn't be deciphered even by the most seasoned fox- who knew what they were thinking? Was the tension a question, much like the ones that kept Alfred up at night? A simultaneous nod that went both ways, a mutual Why do I always find your eyes on me? kind of stare. A stare, a nod of the head, a competition. An, I know you find me interesting, too. A pleasant thing. Or, was it more of, Why the hell are you always looking at me? kind of tension that could very well go both ways?
After what could've been one minute, or ten, Alfred didn't think Kiku would answer him. And after all the thinking Alfred had done under what could've been a minute (that could make up for fifteen years of dilly dallying), he didn't think he'd pry. But Kiku looked down at the ground, an unsure look on his rather perfect face.
"Who... Who said I was lonely?"
He looked up to face Alfred with dull eyes through shaggy hair, taking his stand. The possible start of another longer, much bigger competition?
Alfred did not want to be rude. He didn't want to see the boy he'd been watching for years driven away. But this one really was too much.
"Well, dude, I mean... You're always in that isolation of yours. You never look up, nothing. You never speak unless spoken to, and I never see you with people," He said, shaking his head. He could've honestly rattled off more things that described the boy, but for now, he left it at that.
"I... I don't know what you mean..." He said unevenly, turning his head away. After all these years, after all of his well thought out yet simultaneously impulsive comebacks, had just been blown over by a cold gust, a gentle wind that spoke louder than words ever could. The mound of words that this so called 'King' stood on had been knocked over, precariously built by Alfred. It was no wonder, seeing how haphazardly he had stacked them, but he wasn't going to give up very easily.
"Hey- Sorry to make you uncomfortable, really. I just wanted- want to be your friend!" He exclaimed, putting his unfamiliar hand on the boy's shoulder. Kiku turned to face him immediately, staring at his hand. But- it was gentle. And Alfred felt that his touch was not unwelcomed.
"R-Really? Me? Friends with zipperhead?" He asked, looking at Alfred with truly shocked eyes. They were no longer scared. The statement said was not meant to be self depreciating. It was real, true surprise at such a thing. His eyes looked wavering- much different than that regular dulled appearance. Almost as if he was going to cry from something Alfred could not place. Alfred looked at him in shock- what did he mean?
"Wha- Of course! I'm not gonna hate you like everyone else because your skin is a bit different than mine," He said, smiling at the boy, showing him all his pearly white teeth. Alfred was not going to let war stand in his way. Kiku again looked taken aback- even a little scared. But he nodded nonetheless, sweeping his hair out of his eyes.
"So, wanna hang out after school? At the park?" He said, jerking his head in the direction of the window. Kiku looked out to see the sunny state of California, a clear day. But weren't all days clear? That's what Kiku missed the most about New York, the rain. But they had to leave- his father said it wouldn't be good for them to live there anymore. Three years he had been here, Orange County- and even after three years of adjusting, he was still the new kid. Still looked over if not unaccepted by most.
"U-Uh... Sure... Where to?" He asked, looking at Alfred again. Did he already tell him? Who knew? He was much too lost in his thoughts.
"The park, man. Are you sure you can go?" He asked, slightly concerned. Kiku was spacing out big time. But Kikunodded eagerly. "Of course! I can go wherever I want!" He said, looking defiantly at Alfred. It was amusing- he had just come out of his three year long shell, only to make quite an abrasive comeback. Alfred admired and smiled at the pluckiness he was expecting come.
"Mr. Jones? Mr. Honda? Would you like to share with the class, since it seems far too urgent to wait after the lesson?" The teacher asked, dropping his piece of chalk in irritation. Yes, geez, his teaching skills could be questionable, but they should try to be quieter. Damn.
Kiku shrunk immediately. It seemed he had never gotten in trouble before, let alone being called out on something bad, a small, mindless mistake. Had Kiku Honda ever lived?
"Uh, we're very sorry, I-"
"Sure! Okay, so, I wanted to be friends with him, right? Well I invited him to the park, and guess what? He said yes!" He said brightly, as if he had done this every day. Kiku looked up at him and could've strangled him. One should never mess with teachers!
"That's very nice and well Alfred, but couldn't that wait? I'm sure Kiku wouldn't want to be annoyed by you all lesson. I feel bad for even putting him next to you."
Kiku raised his eyebrows. He didn't know what he was feeling more- indignation, anger, or pressure? Embarrassment? Wait... Anger, for Alfred? Why should he feel such a strong word, such a strong emotion for someone either than himself? Whatever he was feeling, he tried to hide it the best he could. Well, at least he didn't have to think too hard on what they would talk about at the park.
"...Aw, Mr. Kirkland. Are you lonely? I would say you can talk to me, but... I wouldn't want that. I'm sorry you annoy your friends, but I don't annoy mine."
That was how Kiku and Alfred spent their first few hours being 'friends' in detention. Alfred was happy he gave the teacher what he deserved though- he didn't deserve to be talked to in such a way. Yes, he should've waited until after class, but he didn't deserve his teacher's asshole behaviour.
He sighed as he titled his paper 'Lines'. He leaned into his hand- it had only been about five minutes since detention started.
Lines
Alfred F. Jones
April 3, 1969
Man, his dad would kill him. But what would kill him more? His father, or his hand cramps? He looked over to Kiku's paper, seeing fifty lines already there. In five minutes.
Well, at least Mr. Kirkland had gone easy on them. Only three hundred fifty lines, and an easy sentence, too.
I will not disrespect the teacher, he wrote, sighing. Man, one down, three hundred forty nine to go.
"H-Hey, Kiku! I know my smart mouth got us both in trouble, but... Can you still come to the park? It's only three thirty," He said, panting after him. He had run to catch up with Kiku, who seemed to be on the verge of tears. Alfred tried not to stare- Damn, what kind of a sheltered life does he live? He thought, looking away, poorly covering his actions. He didn't want Kiku to know he had seen how much it had meant to him. But Kiku knew- and somehow, it didn't bother him. He simply wiped at his eyes, and looked down at his bent down form. He knew he was making the right choice.
"Of course, Alfred F. Jones," He said gently. When Alfred looked up to him from his hands and knees, he was found with a rare, possibly impossible sight- Kiku's smile. It was soft- a soft smile, conjured by beautiful, soft lips. Do they feel as soft as they look? Woah. He looked down, unable to face him. Did he really just think that?
Looking at his round, innocent, kind face, Kiku knew it was impossible for any threat to lie there.
"Get up, Alfred F. Jones," Kiku said, reaching out his hand. Alfred immediately stood up, both confused and oddly drawn in by the sudden commanding voice- and that welcoming hand. He immediately took his dainty hand, and started running, letting Kiku's short lived lead die.
Nearly tripping in surprise, he struggled to keep up, not being very active.
He panted with the strain of running to an unfamiliar place.
"A-Alfred F. Jones! Slow down a little...!"
"It's just Alfred!"
They sat on the swings, swinging back and forth modestly. For the most part, Alfred didn't know what to say. For the first time in his life, he was truly rendered speechless.
Kids from their school walked close by, suddenly sporadically yelling when they saw the two together.
"Al! Get away from zipperhead! He doesn't know Engrish very well yet!" They yelled over waving to him with one, outstretched arm. Alfred almost yelled back a retort, but it seemed Kiku could handle himself, even if it was just a weak little retaliation.
"You guys, stop...! I don't even know Japanese!" He yelled, a sour look on his face. Alfred couldn't tell if it was a lie or not, but he definitely sounded California.
He shook his head as they walked away, laughing and shoving one another. Alfred looked at him, eyeing Kiku's expression which plainly stated, "Don't worry, I'm used to it."
But Alfred was curious, and cocked his head as a small puppy would.
"So... You're Japanese?"
Kiku shot him a look, swinging his legs back and forth. "I'm American, Jones," He said, fumbling with his sweater. Alfred stared back in a very confused manner.
"But, your blood-"
"It's American, Alfred, just as your is."
Alfred shut up for the time being, staring at a tuft of grass before him, letting that sickeningly sweet warm feeling spread into his chest.
Did he just call him 'Alfred'?
Why was he getting so excited over that? Perhaps it was because Alfred didn't have many real real friends? After three years, this was still the first time they had ever talked. Alfred would always want to pair with him for projects, but couldn't find the courage in his heart to ask him. Kiku always ended up being paired with the teacher, much to his dismay.
"So... Now I see why you always stick to your sweet solitude.." Alfred said, still watching the boys play around with watchful eyes. Next time round that happened, he was definitely giving them a what-for.
Kiku glanced at him through his squinted eyes and chuckled knowingly, shaking his head in a nonchalant fashion.
"Oh, believe me. You'd think you know, but you haven't got a clue!" He said, shaking his head as he kicked a piece of Earth. It flew a surprising distance, landing near the dirty lake. "You know, it wasn't like this back in New York. But... The riots and protesters were too much, and we moved. Don't have to see constant marches anymore," He said, shrugging a bit. Multiple thoughts flew through Alfred's mind at once. New York? Where was his accent?
Alfred didn't know how he could make it seem like no big deal...! I mean, this was war they were talking about!
"But I have to say... Not much teasing went on over there," He said, bowing his head, defeated. Alfred almost wanted to reach over and hug him, but decided against it. Kiku already had enough on his plate, and probably wasn't... Probably wasn't like Alfred.
Alfred looked at him thoughtfully, his blue eyes sparking with interest. Kiku Honda had piqued it to the point that he couldn't ignore it.
"You know... It's okay, though. I can tell you didn't really have friends there. And I know you can miss it, but... It's good here. We would've never met, and you'd never find another me," He said, winking at him jokingly. Kiku stared at the boy through shaggy hair, his interest also piqued. He knew Alfred to be right, but... He didn't know if the fact was a positive or negative one.
He didn't quite know how to deal with him. So, he tested the waters.
"Alfred F. Jones, I barely even know you," He said shortly. Kiku licked his lips subconsciously, hungrily waiting for his answer.
"Haha! Not yet, anyways. Just you wait! We'll be inseparable!" He said, pumping his fist in the air. He seemed so excited to become his friend, Kiku didn't know whether to be pleased or to recoil. But barely getting any friends, he smiled, surprising himself. Too bad Alfred wasn't looking. He knew the way Alfred looked at him despite only speaking him today, and he knew how he lit up and stared at his lips as he smiled- and he loved that attention, especially from such a handsome boy.
"Alfred F. Jones." Alfred jumped as Kiku's voice was suddenly a bit deeper, and gave Kiku his undivided attention. He liked the way his voice sounded. Kiku regained his sentence immediately after pausing, as if he hasn't stopped in the first place.
"Do you got a girlfriend?" He said casually, looking up from his shoes to Alfred's face. He wanted to see how red he would get.
"I-It's just Alfred. And, uh... A-Ahaha! No. I... I'm not really into that," He said, scratching his neck. He felt his face go red with embarrassment, having such a question sprung on him without warning. Well, he wasn't lying; but it wasn't the whole truth, either.
Kiku shrugged, a miniscule smile resting upon his glowing face.
"Yeah, me neither."
If the tingling feeling Kiku had wasn't lying, Alfred had been staring at his lips, probably subconsciously.
"Ok, Just Alfred."
Alfred squinted at him, a playful look that made Kiku chuckle a little.
Looking into Alfred's clear eyes, he knew it to be impossible for any threat to lie there.
"May I call you Fred?"
Alfred smiled down at his feet, kicking the ground lightly. He didn't look up to greet Kiku's light smile with his own, instead marveling in his little victory for the time being. He had finally became friends with Kiku Honda. His grin almost turned mischievous; it seemed apparent to the both of them that Alfred had won this three year war.
"Of course, Kiku Honda." He looked up as he said it, unable to look away anymore. Goddamn. Even if this war was over, he could still feel that tingling in his bones- is this what it felt like to finally make a friend, to let it happen naturally? All of Alfred's friendships felt forced, but... This was new. Alfred liked new. That old tingling feeling inside had soon begun to blossom, into something that felt more... Magnetic? He was sure it was mutual, it didn't need to be said.
For what seemed to be a lifetime, Alfred had been so drawn to Kiku in more aspects than one. He could say it went both ways. But for the three years they've had their eyes on each other, not saying any words, Alfred felt inside he was yelling- if only he could speak his thoughts!
Kiku was the first boy, the first person to ever cause him trouble speaking. But his head was just full of little lines- things like, "Be my friend, please!" and "You can talk to me! You can talk to me!" Would roll around, making him dizzy. But all they had ever shared before today were small inclines of the head, nodding, and some eye contact. That was all. And Alfred was hungry for more. He knew Kiku was, too. For the first time in his life, it was Alfred who was desperate for a friend. For one boy in particular.
The next few days were filled with learning new things about each other- favourite colors, favourite songs, favourite movies. Little things like how Kiku could tie a cherry stem with his tongue, or how Alfred could move his ears. How Kiku loved to eat pepperoni pizza but how he liked hot dogs the most, or how Alfred could eat ten slices in ten minutes. Things that excited Kiku and Alfred, things that told them their friendship was real. Three weeks into everything, Alfred decided it was finally time to let Kiku have some real fun.
"Hey, Kiku, you wanna go somewhere with me?" Alfred said one day at the park. He looked up from his milk box, turning to face Kiku. He was staring at him, something Alfred couldn't make out mingled in his expression.
"Well, we are right now, Fred," He said, gesturing in front of them smartly. He took the milk box from Alfred's hand, sipping a bit without asking. How terrible. Milk on a hot day. Already inseparable after three weeks. What was worse?
Alfred shot him a look. "You know what I mean! I mean like, out out," He said, elbowing him in the side. Kiku looked at him. Even he wasn't brave enough yet to ask Alfred out. But he wasn't one to back down. But suddenly the old, shy Kiku was back. "U-Uh.. Sure.. Where to?" He stuttered, looking at him. His face was dusted pink with embarrassment. Alfred looked at him with a shit eating grin, startling Kiku a bit.
"Ok... Meet me here at ten. I have something to show you," He said, smiling a genuine smile, acting as if he wasn't planning anything. Despite being shy just a few moments ago, Kiku took some time to process this. Out? At ten? Late? He almost wanted to protest, but looking Alfred over, finally resting his gaze on those startlingly blue eyes, he nodded.
"I'll be there."
Alfred sighed in relief. It seemed as if he would run if Kiku denied him.
Walking side by side, shoulders brushing, hands close enough to touch, they sat by the pond.
Kiku was on edge. He had never snuck out- never. Now that he thought of it, he had never gotten in trouble before. Well, besides from the detention from Mr. Kirkland, in English class. Whatever, he didn't mind, the guy was a jerk anyways.
He looked at his watch- nine sixteen. He had to leave now if he wanted to meet him.
Knowing his father was already asleep, as he always was by eight, he opened his window. Heart rushing with excitement, he climbed out of the windows, actions rushed with anticipation.
Meeting Alfred was a hassle- they could barely even see, and meeting one another consisted of bumping foreheads and nearly shouting.
"Uh... We have to do a little walking to get there... But uh, be ready to beat feet if something happens, okay?"
"W-What? Alfred F. Jones, are we breaking in somewhere?" He asked, stomping on his foot. His head jerked down, grimacing in a way he didn't know possible.
"Well... Not exactly... But, you'll see, don't flip your wig! And it's Fred! Remember?"
"Fine."
Wait! No! Not fine! Trespassing was a crime!
Kiku couldn't tell if it was a lie or not. Shaking his head, he sat and wondered how he got into all of this. Why did he agree to this? Three weeks, and he had already gone soft, not able to deny him. But... Not really three weeks. More like three years.
He smiled at the thought of that. He couldn't wait until they were already together for three more years. And after that, too.
Wait.
He was planning on staying with him? For a long time? That long?
He smiled, looking at the street lamps reflecting in Alfred's eyes.
Good.
"H-Here, we better get jamming! Also, we can't be loud..." He suddenly took hold of Kiku's hand, make him blush once more, running in the direction in which he was taking him. Kiku was finding it easier and easier to keep up with him after these three long weeks- both mentally and physically.
Kiku felt that after these three years, he was finally breaking out of that shell of his- because of Alfred. He was finally getting better at talking, standing up for himself, and having fun, only after a little over three weeks. Twenty four days. Would he still be having this kind of fun twenty four years from now? Even in the tenth grade, at age sixteen, he hadn't had any public speaking skills. No friends, either. The cruel remarks all due to his blood and a bloody war had been enough to keep him up at night- his worries could be drowned out with only the record player some nights, but now, that didn't have to happen.
Not only did Kiku have someone to defend him now, he could now stand up for himself. Or, he knew at least how to retort now. Silence was no longer his go-to.
After running for fifteen minutes, they reached a chain linked fenced area. It wasn't very tall at all, and very easy to 'climb'. Once Kiku had entered, he could already feel his blood boil. And with what? Fear? Anger? Confusion? Either way, he walked close to Alfred, restraining from holding his hand. It wasn't out of fear, either- it was such a beautiful night, with a nice breeze. Kiku breathed a big, pleasing breath, taking in the scents. He was so glad it was Friday night, and that he could spend it with Alfred. It almost made him sad to think about- was he humoring himself? Kiku had never found another with the same kind of preferences. But even if Alfred took his hand as it was nothing, and pointed it to the sky, he knew. He felt his heart leap into his throat, and he didn't need telling; His feelings were requited.
They laid down in a spot near a small pond, heads dangerously close to touching. Alfred pointed to the sky with an excited finger. "See...? This is what I wanted to show you... The sky is so beautiful here... And the pond? Look at it, Kiku," He said, sitting up. He put his hand on Kiku's back, giving him that help both of them knew Kiku didn't need. It was nice to do little things for your favourite person. Kiku might've gasped when he registered what he saw- all of the sky's stars reflected in the black pond, making it seem as of they were out of the world.
"Y-Yeah... Far out, Fred," He said, chuckling weakly. God, it was all too much. The beautiful scenery with Alfred, the most beautiful person he's ever seen. The kindest person he's ever known. It was much too surreal to take in- he had snuck out, just to see this with a boy he liked. It... It was honestly such an accomplishment, such a happy thought he started to laugh aloud.
"K-Kiku... You okay?"
He shook his head, wiping away happy tears he was relieved Alfred couldn't see.
"Yes, Fred, I'm just happy... Anyways, where are we?" He said, still chuckling a little. How'd he get stuck with such a stud like Alfred?
"Oh," He started sheepishly. Would this disappoint Kiku?
"We... We're actually at a strawberry field... But every time I see it, the pond makes me feel... So good," He said, slowly shaking his head.
"And I was like, 'I have to share this with Kiku!'" He said, plopping back down. Kiku laid down next to him, his alert face a couple inches from Alfred's- he could feel his light breath.
"Maybe... Maybe I'll take you here for your sixteenth birthday," He said, slightly chuckling. Oh no, he couldn't seem to stop smiling that day.
"Oh, totally! But... Where would you want to go for your sixteenth birthday?" He asked, sighing in content. Honestly, he could die happy right now. His homework was done, he was with Kiku, and they were talking about the future. How could he get any happier? He felt as if his heart could melt right there, staring at Kiku, feeling his breath on his chin.
His breathing quickened with small giggles, and Alfred could tell he was smiling with his teeth. "Fred, I'm already sixteen," He said, moving his hair out of his eyes. He wanted to see the way the pale glow of the moons reflected upon his fair skin, bouncing off his blond hair in the most attractive way. Little did he know, Alfred was doing the same.
Alfred smiled, direction his attention from the stars to the boy laying two inches away from him.
"I hope we get to spend our seventeenth birthdays together..." He said, cutting himself off, even if he had more to say. He refrained from saying 'I want to spend many others together, too' and just settled on watching Kiku for the time being.
Just as Kiku was about to say 'me, too', he was cut off as both boys looked in the opposite direction. All the lights had gone on in a small cabin, not very far from their spot, and they both stood, mirroring each others actions.
"K-Kiku? We... We should get out of here," He said hurriedly, looking around him. But Kiku was one step ahead of him; taking Alfred and his hand by surprise, he sped off, dragging Alfred behind. Another victory.
Even as Alfred walked Kiku back to his window, even if he simply patted his shoulder, even if he was just itching to reach over and kiss him, he had that light, airy feeling. The winded feeling in his chest never subsided, and for the first time, Kiku Honda felt... Alive. He had never had so much fun.
Closing his window and soon his eyes, he smiled through the darkness, unable to sleep. He kept thinking of the way Alfred's eyes glittered outside his window as he bid him goodnight.
Man, he thought,
I am so gone for him.
_
Haha, I got the idea of this from a line in a song. But anyways, this is only gonna be like, four chapters.
