Sesshomaru and the Tiger Woman
By ATG
Disclaimer: i don't own futurama or inuyasha
A long time ago there was a strange man who had white hair and weird markings on his face, his name was sesshomaru taisho, but he got really pissed if you don't call him lord sesshomaru. One day sesshy, jaken and rin were walking through the forest when a 16 year old girl with black hair and orange streaks that resembled a tiger fell out of the trees with 2 giant machine guns. Rin ran behind sesshomaru and grabbed his left leg, the girl then saw them and walked over to sesshy and grabbed his face and said to him in a low, creepy voice "you are covered in a very white fuzz" sesshomaru then reached for his sword but found nothing and once he looked up the girl was gone, 5 seconds later she reappeared behind him with his swords saying "looking for these?"A/N: from now on it's script format 'kay?.
Sesshy: gimme my swords!
Tiger: graaaaaar! NO!
Sesshy: this sesshomaru will not tolerate this behavior!
Tiger: shoots don't be a douchebag sesshy!
Sesshy: you're from that wench's era aren't you!
Tiger: a little further ahead
Sesshy: can i have my swords back?
Tiger: okay then, hey! since you like my era so much why don't you take a month off and stay with me?
Sesshy: why should i? i've been to modern day tokyo once, it's overrated
Tiger: i'm not from tokyo! i'm from america!
Sesshy: fine!
Rin: Yay! vacation!
Jaken: milord are you sure?
Sesshy: what's the worst that can happen?
Tiger then jumps toward the river and tells them that the entrance to america is underwater
Rin: why is it underwater?
Tiger: because nobody wants to go to the cesspool country
Rin: rin will be quiet now
Tiger: good idea
Once underwater they swim through a hole and end up in New New York's sewer system, The group wanders around aimlessly until a crocodile bites the living shit out of jaken, Tiger attemps to shoot the alligator but misses completely and shoots jaken, jaken's last words were "foolish human!" Sessh decides to ressurect jaken and stabs him with his sword. The group then climbs up the ladder to the manhole. Tiger then reaches for her crowbar and opens up the manhole.
Jaken: are you sure about this milord?
Sesshy: like i said what's the worst that can happen?
Sesshomaru is hit in the head by a hover-taxi
Taxi-Man: new york accent watch where you're going or i'll shove my foot up your wazoo!
Sesshy: i stand corrected
Tiger: you'd better watch that.
ON THE SIDEWALK SOMEWHERE
Rin: points to a whored-out passerby-robot what a pretty lady
Tiger: THAT'S NO LADY!
Robot Drag Queen: Damn, chico. One more upgrade and I'll be more lady than you can handle. Why you so stupid, stupid?
Tiger: hey,bite my shiny metal ass!
Robot Drag Queen: You couldn't afford it, honey.
Sesshy: O.O
Rin: O.O
Jaken: smelly human!
Tiger kicks jaken
And then out of nowhere bender appears
Bender: wow! a man who wears makeup!
Tiger: hey bender, i'd like you to meet sesshomaru
Sesshy growls at the robot
Bender: how's it going meatbag?
Tiger: well i'm gonna go get a pack of marlboros
Bender: how much did he cost?
Tiger: he's not a whore
Bender: well, nice meeting you sesshomaru, i'm gonna go kill myself
AT THE LOCAL 14-22
Sesshomaru is eyeballing cans of Slurm and Pepsi
Tiger: yea, 2 packs of marlboros
Clerk: that'll be $14.95
Tiger: ok then hands clerk a 20
Clerk: If for any reason you're not satisfied with our service, I hate you.
Rin: rin wants candy!
Tiger: here's a 5
Rin: Rin is happy
BACK IN NEW NEW NEW YORK
Sesshy: this isn't so bad and nothing horrible has happened yet
Suddenly a giant wormhole appears out of the sky and sucks everyone up in it causing everyone's limbs to fall off.
They end up in the dimension from treehouse of horror IV, Homer 3, A/N: green lines that cross and random shapes everywhere
Somewhere in Iowa, a diabetic goes into insulin shock
Sesshy: great, we're not in new new york anymore
Tiger: hey, who says we aren't...looks around...wow!
a weird metallic cone like thing bounces around in the backround, numbers float around, the group walks over to a small pool of fish
Tiger: mmm...unprocessed fishsticks
The group approaches a street sign made of metallic gold
Sesshy: where are we?
Tiger looks at street sign: well whatever the place is, it looks expensive
The metallic cone approaches the group and gets lodged in jaken's eye, tiger then rips the cone out of jaken's eye and spikes it into the ground, the dimension starts to collapse in itself.
Jaken: foolish human! look what you did!
Rin: and the door's on the other side, the only way out is to jump
Tiger then prepares to jump, grabbing sesshomaru in the process, Tiger: hey, if i'm going, then so are you!
Tiger and Sesshy jump and instantly fall into the black hole, cut to a dumpster on a sunny afternoon, screams are heard as Tiger and Sesshomaru are seen falling from the sky. Tiger and Sesshy fall into the dumpster and jump out, they walk to the street and continue down the sidewalk as everyone stares at them. Tiger spots a 7-11 and drags Sesshy in.
A/N: 14-11 is a parody of 7-11
Please R & R give me new ideas, THE KNOWLEDGE, IT FILLS ME! IT IS NEAT!
