Chapter One
Hawke looked over at Varric from across the table, trying and failing to read his face. "Ugh, fold. I fold." Varric laughed and threw his cards on the table, displaying a winning hand for the third time this evening. "I'm beginning to think you've somehow gotten better at cheating," Hawke observed, taking a sip of her ale.
"You know this is starting to feel like old times again, " Varric sad, collecting his winnings from the center of the table. "Yes, I mean, if you take away the giant green hole in the sky, the world falling apart and the fact that we aren't currently surrounded by sneering templars in The Hanged Man."
Varric laughed and she noticed it wasn't the carefree laugh he had sported in Kirkwall but one that had a deep feeling of worry in it. Hawke observed her friend again, this time noticing the influx of weight his face held, the way his smile had lost some of it's spark. Times had indeed changed.
"We've been through a lot together Hawke, and I'm not saying our time in Kirkwall was always easy, but damned if I don't sometimes miss it. Isabela flirting with poor oblivious Merril, Anders and Fenris arguing about mages." At the mention of Fenris Hawke winced, feeling a ping of pain in her chest. Varric noticed the change and sighed, he was always highly perceptive.
"He needs to know you're here Hawke. He's written me several times, I don't like lying to my friends." Hawke ran her fingers through her blonde hair, "Then don't. A lack of response isn't an answer...or a lie." Varric shuffled the deck, "At least tell him you are alive, and heading to Weisshaupt." Hawke slammed her head against the table, "I miss him."
"Miss who?" Hawke looked up to see the Inquisitor standing in the door way, arms crossed and leaning against the wall. "Inquisitor," Varric said, suddenly smiling again and waving his cards in the air, "Care for a game?" The inquisitor walked towards the table, taking a seat next to Hawke, "No thank you, I'd like to keep some piece of my dignity, and not end up running back to my quarters in the nude like a certain commander I know."
Varric laughed, "Very well then. What are you doing up so late?" She suddenly turned a bright shade of red and started to attempt to explain herself, tripping over her words as she did so, "Well you see..I was...inquisition buisness." Hawke laughed, recognizing the embarrassment on her face, she had seen it on Aveline's when she was started courting her now husband.
Varric held out his hand, "So, visiting Chuckles then." The inquisitor turned even more red, "I guess there's no point in lying to you." Hawke chuckled, good to know that Varric was still the most well informed person she knew, especially on those close to him. "And which one of her companions is Chuckles?" Hawke asked.
"Solas. Bald, Quiet, Solemn. In Sera's words the 'elfiest elf that has ever elfed," Varric explained, dawning an accent for the last part of it. "Ah, yes," Hawke said, "congratulations." The Inquisitor sighed and looked at her feet. "Something wrong?" Varric asked, "I'm always here to listen."
The inquisitor shifted in her seat," I just, don't understand him sometimes. It feels like he's holding back or pulling away from me. We haven't really defined our relationship and I guess I'm just confused. I care for him, and I know he cares for me but there's just something missing."
Hawke frowned, "I've been through a similar circumstance. Fenris," she steeled herself against her pain and resolved herself not to cry, "Fenris was a slave for most of his life, to a magistar. So being a mage myself, our relationship was...complicated for a while. Still is sometimes. I don't know anything about Solas, but sometimes being patient and being in the moment are all you can do. Life is short, be happy in the time you have, in what is yours now, and let the rest fall where it may." Hawke took a sip of ale and patted the inquisitor on the back, "That's my advice at least."
She stood to leave and Varric called after her, "Hawke? Done losing all your money?" Hawke placed her empty mug on the table, "I have someone to write."
