Summary: Hinata has been abused all her life. It's tiring living like that: weak, trying to be better, trying to get better, but nothing has or ever will work with her father. Deciding this was her last beating, she ends it all. In her life though, she never knew someone cared and wanted to do something for her. Now that someone is distraught and nonfunctional, until a friend helps him. Takes place during the original series.
Warning: Abuse and Suicide


'He hates me. They all hate me. What's my use? That's right, I-I-I have no purpose...' Hinata said to herself hugging her legs as she sat on the floor of her spacious room. Her walls were dabbed a light-purple all around, but her heart had become as black as her closet. She couldn't even look around to her pictures that covered her desk. Pictures of Naruto, Ino, TenTen, Team 11, and so many of her other friends. But she had to have one that made her tear up every time. It was from nearly twelve years ago right in the Hyuga compound's family garden. Standing on the edge of the pool were her demanding father and her gentle mother as she hugged her first daughter. Her eyes were closed with joy while wearing a wide smile unlike her unkindly husband with focused eyes that were as menacing as a wild boar's. He didn't even wear some type of smile for the family picture of the year. Oh, the memories...

'Mama, why did you have to leave? Why? The man you called a husband is not a lover. After you, his love was the younger child while the eldest was made the laughing stock. You haven't seen what he does. I-I can't even start to describe it...' Tears were rolling down the innocent girl's smooth, white cheeks. Her head was still caressed in her hands before she heard a bellow from below. "Hyuga girl! Get down here immediately!"

"Coming father!" She shouted almost screaming it to the village. She quickly wiped her tears and covered her face with her hair so that it wasn't obvious she had been crying. If her father saw...

She made it to the bottom three stairs before she jumped to make sure she would not be yelled at for being slow, but it didn't help that her ankle twisted and she fell sideways and made a small crash in the floor. "Scum! Stop playing around!"

"I'm coming father!" She tried to stand up as quickly as possible, but fell again. She saw her sister come through the door in he room. Hanabi saw her sister on the floor, considered to help her, but then walked away not wanting to be scolded by the strictness of their father.

"YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING GIRL! YOU BETTER BE HERE IN FIVE SECONDS OR IT WILL BE ANOTHER FIFTY!"

"I'm coming father!" She pulled herself against the wall and limped to the parlor as quickly as she could. She got to the doorway and leaned against the frame.

"Do you have a valid explanation for your lateness?"

She wanted to explain it, or lie about doing homework or something, but no matter what she'd say, she knew he wouldn't accept it. "No, I don't. I'm sorry for making you wait, father."

"You better be. That's at least twenty lashes there after you run these to Ms. Yamanaka. BUT, you better not get caught talking with her daughter again because if you take too long, a hundred."

She bowed quickly, "Yes sir!" She stiffly crossed to the basket of herbs and other beautiful smells and picked up the basket as normally as possible even though it was light but her foot wanted to say otherwise. She covered up her pain and started to turn around. "One second, girl. Here are some rocks to help with strength training," and he put three big rocks against the sides of the woven basket. "If you forget to take these out and actually give them to Ms. Yamanaka, another fifty."

"Yes sir!" 'Quick bow, quick exit,' she thought to herself and performed before finally leaving the room.


Hinata stumbled down the street to the Yamanaka flower shop as quickly as she could. She didn't want any more lashes today, or much less, insults. During her beatings, he'd always scorn and mock her, telling her the inevitable truth that she was pathetic, useless, and weak.

"Hey Hinata!" She looked up and saw Shikamaru wave as he walked by and came up to her side. She nodded in response. 'I have to get to the shop quickly.'

"Hey Hinata, do you need some help with that?" She nodded. He grabbed the heavy basket and Hinata started to run as fast as she could.

"Wait up Hinata! Yikes, what do you even have in this."

"Please Shikamaru, I need to get to Ino's house as quickly as possible," and he knew what she meant. Everyone knew about Hiashi, the head of the Hyuga clan. Seen as one of the most powerful ninja in the Leaf, everyone loved him. Therefore, everyone he hated, everyone hated as well. Hinata was then an outcast while it had been decided that Hanabi would be the next leader of the clan instead of her. But to Hinata, it was just proof that she was useless and weak, unwanted and uninvited. Thankfully, she had met a few people that disagreed with Hiashi and accepted Hinata, but being partners with them made her feel weak again. 'There's no balance. All of them are great at their own family jutsu whereas I don't understand my own clan. What is my use if I can't do anything to help others?'

She slowed her speed as she came to the flower shop of the Yamanaka clan. Ino saw Hinata and immediately dropped what she was doing to go meet her friend. "Hey Hinata! How're you doing? Oh Shikamaru! Nice to see you as well." Hinata didn't reply though, she just looked down at her feet, then quickly see where Shikamaru was. He had just pulled up right besides her, a little exhausted from carrying what he didn't realize were really rocks. He handed the basket off to Hinata who quickly turned around to remove the rocks, putting them on the side of the road. She stood up and turned around to hand the basket to her friend before she quickly turned around and fled.

"What was that about Nara?"

He had seen Hinata take out actual rocks from such an easily light basket, and he knew exactly why they were in there. "Hiashi..." Ino understood from just the one word, then her anger started to boil up. "Why the hell does he have to be so cruel to her! I saw her -at the beginning of training with Kiba and Shino one time and she was already exhausted from getting there. Then in the evening, I saw her in the Hyuga garden training her butt off with Hiashi. He was so cruel. He eventually got tired of her and called on Neji to train her. Oh goodness, I love Neji for what he did for her compared to Hiashi. He was so much more gentle to her than in the chunin exams." She went into a daze when telling her partner everything. She was staring to the clouds, and her eyes eventually wondered back down to earth and asked Shikamaru, "Isn't there anything we can do?"

Shikamaru mumbled the worst but what would've been in Hinata's best interest: "We could kill Hiashi." As soon as he said that, he felt a smack right across his face from his partner. "Hey! You know it's the truth," he verbally replied to the action, caressing his cheek while speaking.

"Yes, I know, but you can't say such thing in the wide open. Someone could hear you and pulverize her."

"She's right Nara." The two members of Team 10 heard from across the street. They were shocked to have heard anything from anyone at all. They turned and saw the speaker, tensing up at realizing who it was. "But I have to agree with you Nara, it would be for the better of all of us. It's not as bad with Hanabi and I, but it's nothing compared to sweet Hinata. I've even often times tried to get her out of training with her dad because it's so gruesome. And you know me and training, how it must be constant and pushing, but hers with Hiashi is pure torture.

Shikamaru was feeling even worse about Hinata's whole situation. Ino was even on the verge of tears. "I-I d-don't know how she does it. She's so... p-precious a-a-and g-gentle... She's nothing less than an angel to us all..."

"Living under the custody of Hiashi Hyuga!" Neji practically yelled from half-way across the street as he had started walking over. "And there's nothing we can do about it. Hiashi Hyuga has become gruesome because of lose, and he doesn't cope with any sort of change at all. He has always been one to be angered easily, my father even told me so as a young child. His anger and lake-of-coping all goes out on her. And now, and trust me when I say I've observed and seen it, she's losing her own coping abilities. Her body has been in detrimental health and it continues to fall by the day. And I can't imagine what runs through her head now..." Neji had to stop to think for even himself. Ino collapsed as her own thoughts whirled at high speeds inside her head.

Shikamaru's head was an entirely different universe to even begin describing. He had also watched her as she trained in the fields with her team and he saw her stay even afterwards to train herself more while bug-boy and dog-runner went for refreshments. He had tried to bring her food on occasions for after those practices, but failed as she said she had to go home for dinner. She would always turn and sprint back to that Hyuga compound. But he could never see what happened inside those walls. 'Custody... Gruesome... Anger... Coping... Health... Running though her head...'

"Neji..." Hinata's lover spoke in a low voice, "Hinata couldn't be..." 'No, she is strong, she's lived with it, tolerated it, kept up with it all, and still has a few people...'

"Shikamaru, I'm sorry, I heard it for myself. She's alone... Or so she feels like it. I hear her, every night, as I pass to my own room. Rocking back and forth but I didn't realize it until she started voicing it aloud (and thank Kami Hiashi doesn't go up until much later in the night). The first time I heard it, I went into her room and tried to help her but..." Neji, the Neji Hyuga, fell to his knees with a low head to cover his teared face and tight, white fists on his knees. It took him a while to compose himself, but after some help from Ino's comforting hand on his shoulder, he began speaking again. "She hates it... hates everything..., hates herself, her life... she regrets everything... even her friends. I hate seeing her pain compared to bearing my own." He spoke from true experience. A few times he had angered Hiashi and the curse of the Hyuga side branch had been used on him. He hated it, and it was why he always kept himself strictly composed. But he hated Hinata's situation more because her pain seemed never ending compared to his hope light at the end of the tunnel. She had none.