~! MISS~KIREI !~
"Wildest Dreams"
This is a one-shot songfic based on the song Wildest Dreams, by Taylor Swift. Make sure you listen to it when you read it. This is basically a spin-off kind of story with an alternative ending to my on-going story "My Fucked Up Heart". The characters are the usual and the narrative belongs to my Original Character, Mia Kirei. I hope you enjoy the one-shot. I will try to make a comeback soon, until then I hope you will wait for me~!
Edit: Upon request, I have removed the copied lyrics from Wildest Dreams. All credits of the song go to Taylor Swift and I own nothing except the plot of this songfic, my fucked up heart, and my OC Mia Kirei.
I've always wanted to fall in love. Fall in love stupidly, idiotically, selflessly. Maybe it wasn't ever about falling in love, maybe it was just about the idea of being so devoted to someone, the idea of being one with someone else, the idea of being consumed by the passion, the lust, the affection,
By being screwed for the heck of it.
For I hadn't know what an aphrodisiac love was. I was stupid, and naïve. I did not realize what I was asking for, when I said I'd wanted to fall in love. I didn't know the promises I was making to myself, and to him…without knowing that he didn't want them.
It was all in my control at first, but then I guess I fell too hard, and didn't realize how the gravity of my feelings was sure to pull me down. I was falling hard, and fast. Maybe our worlds were two poles apart. I had always known that his world spun around faster than mine ever could, but I still wanted to be a part of it, even if it meant shining like a star too bright, and turning to the ashes too fast.
Nothing lasts forever
You pulled me towards yourself, you controlled my heart and soul and dragged it along with yourself with every step that you took away from me, and you kept walking...walking till my heart and soul became your own.
Maybe it was your eyes, the forest green pools that shone brighter than the moon that pulled me towards you. I could see the reflection of your enigma in them and couldn't help but feel the need to know more…to learn more than I could ever digest.
I mean, I had always known that we were never a match. You were the forbidden fruit I wasn't supposed to taste, but its how the saying goes, you always want what you can't have. Maybe it was the case with me too…maybe I just wanted to know what it would feel like—calling someone like you as my own. But really now, we can't put name tags on people, can we?
But I still let you have me, and god knows I'd hate myself forever, but I still would give myself up for you, if only you said you wanted me to. I would give myself up over and over again, but for something in return…
Say you'll see me again even if it's just in your wildest dreams
I remember losing myself in you. I remember feeling the ecstasy that would last for a fraction of seconds. I remember cherishing your warmth forever, I remember your scent that had started to feel a lot like home… but amidst all this, I remember the unforgettableness of you…I remember it too.
I knew what was to follow, I knew I was to fade away from your life without even a hint of my presence, I knew this was to happen even though I didn't want it to. I knew it all from the start.
But I still let it happen to me.
Does this make me a masochist? To hope for all this unrealistic things, feeling worthless? Did I purposely want to feel this?
I thought seeing you with another woman wouldn't hurt me much. I thought I would get over you within a couple of weeks. I thought I would be able to go on without the thought of you crossing my mind.
But I guess our fucked up hearts always find a way to surprise us all…
It broke me to see you with Misa.
Even though I had been to create distance between us, I was the one who took the first step towards breaking us off, I was the one who even attempted to make you hate me forever…
It still killed me.
I know I wasn't supposed to hate you for being in love with her. I knew that it was the both of our faults that this joke of our relationship happened in the first place. Maybe it happened because I knew too less and you knew too much. I wanted to learn and you wanted to forget.
I guess opposites don't always attract…huh.
But I guess its been too long, too long for me to think about these things again. I wanted to let you know that I had found a way to pick myself up from where you had left me. I worked hard on my dreams and goals and got what I wanted from my life. I travelled to so many places, I met so many people, I grew so much emotionally…
Although I had wanted to tell so much to you, but the moment you had looked at me, standing afar on the altar in a white blazer, shining like the sun, with a smile that brought salvation back into me, I forgot all about it.
All I remembered was your smile and your own way of telling me how thankful you were to me. I got what all you wanted to say to me with just a simple look. The orchestral music started to play and I wish I was the rose sitting peacefully in the breast-pocket of your blazer. The eyes turned to the centre of attention that was the bride. I knew this was my cue to look away, and wish you all the best.
She was beautiful, I thought when I saw her. Misaki was always a strong woman everyone would look at and be proud. She inspired me, even though she had the love of my life. He wasn't mine to begin with.
I smiled and clapped from the side-lines as I saw her walk towards you. I saw that unforgettable smile on your face and the glow in Misaki's face. I couldn't control my tears and my heart couldn't understand whether I was happy or sad. I turned around as I saw you both exchange rings and I knew I was too weak inside to see you both kiss…I just couldn't.
I walked away as fast as I could, trying my best to be happy, even though I failed. Undoubtedly, I was happy. If I didn't want any of this to happen I would have never stepped away from your way, but I still did.
I calmed myself down when I saw so many happy faces around me. I could feel that their happiness was contagious and I decided to be happy for the couple who had been apart for too long… I could do that. I also saw someone else standing by the door, glass of wine in his hand. I had never seen this man before but I could swear that the look I saw on his face was painstakingly similar to mine.
The look of a broken heart.
I realized I had been staring too long when he sent a small smile my way, his side teeth showed when he smiled, but it was rather a small smile—a fake one. I smiled back and he walked towards me, partly making me forget what I was thinking about. He told me his name and I think I had heard it before somewhere…
"Tora Igarashi"
Wildest Dreams.
~! MISS KIREI ~!
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