Title: If The Sun Comes Up
Author: sylvanelfqueen
Fandom: Hawaii Five-0
Pairing: Steve/Danny; Grace
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: All Hawaii Five-0 characters herein are the property of CBS. No copyright infringement is intended
Word Count: 1360 words
Summary: "See you soon, kiddo," he whispered, then turned away, striding out of her rom, out of the house, and out of their lives as quickly as he could. If he lingered any longer, he knew he wouldn't ever be able to leave.
Author's note: The words used in the letters are the lyrics from the song "If The Sun Comes Up" by Trace Adkins. LYRICS || SONG
Also, I owe a huge thank you to the wonderful and amazing betty_mraz who created the gorgeous banner you see above. I love you, babe. Thank you so much for extending your wonderful graphics skills to my little fic. You are the best!
Steve stood there and just counted each breath that sighed passed her lips. He knew he needed to leave, he should have left a few minutes ago, but he just couldn't make himself walk away. Grace looked so peaceful in her sleep, so young and innocent. But when he looked closer, he could see the dried tear tracks on her face. She cried herself to sleep, he realized, and it killed him just a little bit more to know he was the reason. Grace is the strongest, most resilient ten-year-old he knows. It took a lot to break her down, and yet with a few words, that's exactly what he'd done.
"Oh, Gracie," he whispered and took that last final step to her bed. He stroked a finger softly down her cheek and watched with bated breath as she stirred but doesn't wake. He already said goodbye to her once, he couldn't bear to do it again.
When she stirred, the blankets shifted revealing a stuffed animal tucked under her arm. It's a seal with the Superman logo sewn onto the front of his chest. Grace had shown up one weekend with it, despite Rachel's protests, and he had become a regular among her treasured stuffed animals. She named him Super Seal and told Steve that it was named after him. She hadn't slept with him in over a year though.
Steve swallowed thickly and tucked the blanket back up around her shoulders. A soft beep from his pocket pulled him back to reality and reminded him that he needed to go. With a soft sigh, Steve slipped a small white envelope into Grace's lax hand and brushed a kiss over Grace's forehead.
"See you soon, kiddo," he whispered, then turned away, striding out of her rom, out of the house, and out of their lives as quickly as he could. If he lingered any longer, he knew he wouldn't ever be able to leave.
When Grace opened her eyes, it took her a minute to remember why her heart was so heavy, why even though it looked like any normal day, it wasn't. It was only when she glanced down and saw an envelope on her bed that she remembered. She sighed heavily and picked up the envelope. She'd know Steve's writing anywhere after seeing it on so many permission slips and notes and birthday cards for the last three years, with it's sharp lines and all capital letters. It used to drive her dad nuts, she remembered fondly, but eventually he realized it was just one of those little things that you'd never change about a person. She liked it, personally; it was so Steve.
She hugged Super Seal closer to her chest and contemplated whether or not she should open it. They'd said their goodbyes last night, she thought. She'd hugged Steve so hard, burying her face into his neck for the longest time. Then she had ripped herself away and run to her room, barely closing the door before the tears had started. She wasn't sure she could handle a written goodbye as well, but after a moment she thought better of it. Steve wouldn't leave her a note unless there was something important he wanted to her to know.
With shaky fingers, Grace broke the seal on the envelope and slowly unfolded the letter inside.
Gracie,
If the sun comes up without me tomorrow, if I leave this world tonight, would you really know how much I care about you, or the way you've changed my life?
I know there would be tears and I hope you'd get past it. And when you think of me, you'll think of me laughing.
Go on living. Don't stop loving. Please find something you can put your heart into. And if the sun comes up, without me tomorrow, you'll be fine. Just let it shine on you.
Love you always,
Steve
A sob tore its way out of her throat as she stared down at the words he'd written. Her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest. The only thing she wanted was to open her door and find Steve waiting down on the lanai in the morning sun, but she knew that wouldn't happen. Steve was being shipped off to war and she may never see him again. It wasn't until she was halfway down the stairs and heard a muffled sob that she realized her father might just be feeling the same way.
Danny stared at the note for the longest time, trying to decide if he really wanted to read those words. Steve, the sneaky bastard, had left the envelope on Danny's nightstand, right under his cellphone. When he'd found it, Danny had wanted to drop it in the trashcan. He didn't want to read Steve's goodbye, he didn't want to see those words written in black ink on paper. It would make the possibility of them never seeing Steve again too real.
So instead, Danny had carried the note downstairs with him while he started the coffeepot. He watched the sun finish rising over the ocean and listened to the coffee perk and just held the letter in his hand. After two cups of coffee, he decided it was now or never. Grace would be getting up soon and he didn't want to upset her. Tearing open the letter quickly, he started to read the short note.
Danny,
If the sun comes up and I'm not there to hold you, don't you let it cloud your faith.
Never lose your smile and hold on to your passion. Make the world a better place.
I know you won't forget the life we had together and more than anything, I hope you'll remember.
I believe you'll watch the sun rise with me for years to come, but if it turns out this morning's our last one, baby, go on living. Don't stop loving. Please find something you can put your heart into. And if the sun comes up without me tomorrow, you'll be fine. Just let it shine on you.
Love you always,
Steve
Danny dropped the note back onto the counter like it had burned him and turned to face the window as the first tears fell. It didn't take long for those few tears to turn into sobs. He pressed his hand against his mouth to stifle them so he wouldn't wake Grace, but a moment later he heard her footsteps on the stairs. He tried so hard to rein it in, wiping uselessly as his face as he heard her come into the kitchen. It was only her choked out "Danno" that had him spinning around to face her.
Seeing his baby girl standing in the middle of their kitchen, tears streaming down her face as she clutched a note to her chest, broke Danny the rest of the way. He stumbled the few steps to her, picking her up and wrapping her shaking, sobbing form in his arms. He tucked his face against her neck and held her close as his own sobs tore through him.
"We'll be okay, Gracie. It's okay. It's all going to be okay," he whispered to her, desperately hoping that it was the truth.
Steve stared down at the picture in his hands. It was a picture Kono had taken last year of the three of them. He and Danny were sitting in the sand off the back of the house, Steve had one arm wrapped around Danny while Danny's hand lingered on Steve's thigh. And right between them, Grace had poked her head between theirs as she clung to the both of them. It was his favorite picture of them, his family. As the engines stared, Steve felt a tear slip down his cheek that he hastily wiped away. It was the hardest thing he'd ever done, leaving his family behind to fight in another war. He was going to do everything in his power to make sure they never had to follow the words he'd written to them. He was going to come home to them.
END.
