"And I'm not alone...With the touch of your hand, I am whole again."

- Not Alone, All That Remains

~0~

After three long years of solitary confinement, freedom from her Vessel had not come at all in the way that Paimon had imagined it would.

For instance, she had not expected that she would only be freed after all the fighting was over: all the fury of the storm that had been pent up over so long was now left with no place to be unleashed. Neither had she expected that she would awake to see the system she had been fairly comfortably placed in for a thousand years completely torn to shreds. And the world with it, though to be fair she'd never seen quite enough of it to be too fussed over its entirely swapped locations. It had been both thrilling and frightening, yes, to walk out from the ruins of Alma Torran into this new place. But she had known full well that that was what had to be, and it was a world of all their creation to boot.

This? This was entirely unfamiliar; even the original form she'd reverted back to felt too small and too flimsy. Too powerless. Unused to the earth beneath her feet again, unused to standing on her own two legs, skittering around as she got her balance...She wasn't sure she liked it at all.

But then she lifted her head, and froze when she saw the one person that sent all the fear and doubt flying out of her body just as fast as they'd set in. Then all at once, she was sprinting as fast as these legs could carry her, at that spot of clarity in this mess of color and sound -

"Hakuei-chan!"

There was just enough time for Hakuei's head to turn and her eyes to widen before impact. In immediate hindsight, Paimon thought maybe she should have slowed down a bit, feeling Hakuei nearly buckle and fall under the force of her embrace, emitting a distinct "Oof!" sound as the breath was knocked from her. But she couldn't help it. The feeling of her queen at last, at last, safe in her arms again, was too overwhelming...She was safe, right?!

She pulled back just as quickly as she had come in, holding Hakuei by her shoulders and looking her up and down. Her mouth was moving without her thinking about it. "Are you all right? Are you hurt?! I don't know how I ended up all that way away from you!"

Hakuei was blinking up at her, with more surprise and wonder in her eyes than there'd been the first time she'd seen Paimon, all those years ago in her treasure room. "It's all right, Paimon, I'm fine. Don't panic."

Her voice was somewhat faint, but other than that, she seemed mostly undamaged. Which left room for something else to catch Paimon's attention. She glanced down at herself: only an inch or three taller than Hakuei instead of towering over her, tan skin and brown hair instead of deep blue, and...Oh, thank heaven, she was wearing clothes. But still!

"You...You know who I am?" she blurted.

Hakuei smiled, albeit weakly. "Of course I do. Who else has ever called me Hakuei-chan?"

That sent a pleasant chill over Paimon's newly thin skin. She was all ready to say more - perhaps to address the worn and tired look she saw around her queen's eyes - but then Seishun and the Kouga clan, shaking off their surprise, had crowded around them, and she was quickly occupied with getting acquainted with them. Of course she knew all her sweet children, even if they were not technically her Household anymore, but they were not quite as familiar with her.

The Djinn were no longer Djinn, but they of course did not cease to exist when their Vessels were rendered powerless, instead were merely ejected from them and reverted to their original states. The majority, as she heard, elected to stay with their former masters, their bonds still holding strong. All of the Ren family's had, anyway, as they returned to Rakushou together, even if there was some confusion in figuring out where they would belong from now on.

(The palace rumor mill informed her that all of Sinbad's seven had, as well, lingering in Sindria and waiting for the return of their vanished master. She couldn't say she understood them, but she did find herself pitying them, still holding a candle for a fickle, traitorous thing like Sinbad.)

Vinea now resided in a lake that had conveniently sprung up near the shaken palace grounds, where she was happy to provide Empress Kougyoku with advice as needed - very proud, she said, of how her little fledgling had grown. Zagan could usually be found annoying Prince Hakuryuu and his ex-Magi partner, contrasting Belial, who tended to keep his distance from the pair. Leraje still hung around Prince Kouha and his girls, smoking and scoping out potential mates, just like the old days. Kouha, as she'd heard, had been more than happy to officially add her to his loyal band of outcasts. Phenex spent her time fussing over Prince Kouen, trying to see what she could do to help him recover, while Agares and Astaroth joined Dantalion in helping the royal family with their efforts to restructure the country's military and bureaucracy.

And here Paimon was, lingering around the palace with no clear purpose, not having spoken to Hakuei in weeks.

It wasn't that she didn't want to, not at all! She would spend every waking minute by her queen's side if she could, it was just...she wasn't certain if Hakuei felt the same way anymore. Not only had she made no effort to seek out Paimon, she seemed to be actively avoiding her, ducking out of the room and avoiding eye contact whenever they came close. She hadn't heard the princess speak another word to anyone since her return, and the pallor of her face and the dark shadows under her eyes concerned Paimon deeply.

She had a decidedly unsettling suspicion of what could be causing her distress, so much so that she had felt the need to go get some confirmation.

"Seishuuuuun, what's the matter with her? Have I done something wrong? Won't she talk to anybody?"

"Well," said Seishun, who was quite quickly getting used to Paimon flopping down on top of him. "I don't think it's about you, exactly. She'll talk to us and to Hakuryuu a little, but she won't really look us in the eye. After, um...everything that happened with her, I think she's ashamed. And confused, probably. I think...Maybe just give her a little time? I'd go talk to her but I don't want to hurt her or scare her any worse."

Paimon sighed. That had sounded fair enough, though she did tell herself that if Hakuei did not respond within a week or if she started to look any worse, she would step in. But as it happened, she didn't have to. That very night, she turned the corner to the branch family's rooms (where she and Zagan had been situated as well) and there was Hakuei, dressed for bed but leaning against the wall beside her door, arms crossed and head turned down to the floor. She glanced up at the soft sound of Paimon's footsteps, and Paimon stopped in her tracks, heart sinking at how utterly miserable the poor woman looked.

"Paimon." Her voice was still so quiet. "May I talk to you?"

Paimon blinked. "Yes...Yes, of course you can, what is it?"

"I..."

Hakuei trailed off. She turned around and went into her bedroom, gesturing to Paimon to come with her. Paimon followed her in and across the candlelit room, sitting down on the bed next to her. Hakuei looked determinedly down at the floor again, hands folded in her lap. She swallowed hard and bit her lip, as if trying to say something but not finding the words.

It cut Paimon down to the bone to see her like this: worn, exhausted, afraid, as if she'd been through an endless war with no respite. And she had, hadn't she? Arba's laugh echoed in her head, and brought her own burning hate back with it. It was that witch's darkness that had done this, forced itself inside Hakuei and drained her dry, with no one to protect her - !

Another second and Paimon might have blurted something out, but Hakuei beat her to it. "Did you...know what happened to me? Before they told you."

"...Yes, I did."

"And you knew who it was."

"Yes," Paimon answered, with some surprise and more than a little dread. "Did...you?"

"No. I didn't know anything until she told me. She was all too happy to boast."

Paimon swore she felt herself go pale as she realized what that meant, and was too horrified by it to respond right away. So Hakuei continued, and with her next words, might as well have stabbed Paimon directly in the heart.

"Paimon, I'm sorry..." Hakuei's head twitched, as if she wanted to look at Paimon but couldn't make herself do it. "Were you angry at me? Do you hate me?"

She felt very abruptly as if she'd been dunked bodily into cold bile, and hoped that the slack-jawed stare she was giving Hakuei now wasn't too off-putting.

"You thought...No!" Her sudden shout made Hakuei jump and look her her in shock, and she immediately regretted it but couldn't stop the words spilling out of her mouth. "No, of course I'm not angry at you! And of course I don't hate you! Wh-Why would you think that?!"

"I...She...She said you knew her. And because I was her daughter, y-you'd think I - "

"No, no, no, you stop right there." Paimon scooted closer to Hakuei until their knees brushed together, looking directly into the younger woman's eyes. "Listen to me. Whatever she told you, it was a lie, all right? Just a cruel, petty lie meant only to hurt you."

"She said you felt it happen, when she took me. She felt your anger..." A sardonic huff came up from her throat. "You should have heard her screaming in rage, she said. About how I must have tricked you, I didn't believe her but she said things like that over and over, for so long, I - "

"I said stop! Right now!" Paimon reached out to take Hakuei's shoulders in her hands, gripping her tight, not bothering to hide the desperation on her face. "Yes, I did feel her take you, and yes, you should have heard me, because I was terrified out of my mind for you! All this time, she was right there next to you, right under all our noses planning to do those awful things to you, and I never knew until I heard you crying out and felt her forcing her way in, washing you away with all her - "

She choked on that, on the memory of that ice-cold evil overwhelming her. Before she knew it, her throat was closing up and Hakuei's image was blurred by stinging tears. The only thing keeping her from breaking down was the feeling of Hakuei's shoulders under her fingers.

"I wanted to come and save you, I swear to you, I did! But she, she threw my Vessel away, and I couldn't get out, I tried so hard, but I couldn't feel you at all, and I - !"

She flinched in spite of herself when Hakuei's hands flashed up to grab her wrists, holding on just as desperately as she was.

"It's okay! It's okay. I understand, I was just being paranoid, I-I...I was fighting too."

It took Paimon a few tries to swallow the lump in her throat. "Y-You...were?"

"Yes. I...It was...so strange. In that place...And it was a place. Even Arba wasn't sure where exactly. But I...She was in control, always. I was either someplace between asleep and awake, or awake but not able to do anything. I couldn't see or hear outside for so much of the time, I could never move, but I...I..." Hakuei looked down at Paimon's lap, and mumbled the next words. "In any case, it was Arba's domain, that much she made clear. I was..."

Every word did things to Paimon's insides she hadn't thought possible, but she still found it in herself to speak. "You were awake, this whole time. I was praying that you were asleep, that you weren't afraid or in any pain. But she hurt you."

It wasn't a question. Hakuei's fingers trembled, and she clung tighter to still them. She took a deep, slow breath before answering. "Yes. She did, she was...doing everything she could to make me stop fighting for control back. To make me lie down and die, in other words. But I couldn't do that to any of you, I couldn't! Even if...Sometimes..."

Hakuei tried to go on, but only a shaky, nervous noise came out instead, that told Paimon very clearly that the conversation needed to veer in a completely different direction.

So, driven by her gut instinct, she threw her arms completely around Hakuei and pull her in close for a hug. From the way Hakuei only stiffened in surprise for a second before relaxing into Paimon's touch, giving a contented hum as she sank her head onto her chest...She knew that that must have been the exact right thing to do.

"You can tell me anything, you know," she said softly. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, but...You've been so brave and so strong, but you've been all alone. I'm here for you now, is all I'm trying to say. Even if I can't lend you any more power."

"It did feel wonderful, to be bonded with you that way. I never felt more powerful in my life. But...If I'm really being honest, I think I prefer you this way." Hakuei lifted her head slightly to look up at Paimon's face, with a hesitant little smile as she took it in. "I never noticed until just now, but...Do you know, you have the most beautiful brown eyes I've ever seen?"

"O...Oh?" A startled Paimon blinked them several times, her stomach performing a series of impromptu backflips. She couldn't tell whether it felt good or not, she reflected, as she ran a tentative hand over Hakuei's loose hair. "Well...I never thought about that. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen is you, after all."

Hakuei laughed, but there was something hollow in it. The princess rolled over in Paimon's arms, and she laid back against the pile of pillows to accommodate the new position. She looked down at her own robe-clad body with an an expression that Paimon couldn't place, but that worried her.

"I don't feel beautiful. When I look at myself, after everything she did, I...I expect to see myself...mangled. Torn apart. Stained with her handprints, everywhere she..." Hakuei gulped, turning her face back to Paimon's shoulder. Paimon, for her part, thought she knew exactly what Hakuei was so unwilling to say, and it boiled her blood, but she forced herself to stay calm and attentive as Hakuei pressed her fingertips to her cheek...her now smooth and perfect cheek. "But there's nothing, no proof I was ever hurt at all. And I can't even say I'm exactly the way I used to be, either. My scars, she erased me, she took away my scars - !"

She choked on the beginnings of a sob.

"A puppet. That's what she called me. Not a soldier, she said, I was never born to be a soldier, just a pretty little puppet for her to use. She didn't just take three years of my life. She didn't just take my father, and my brothers! She took hold of me and tried to rip out and throw away everything I made of myself, a-and now I'm...I'm just this blank shell that's rotten and empty on the inside, and there was nothing I could do to stop her, I couldn't even free myself in the end - !"

Hakuei broke off into tears, and Paimon held her closer, as if just holding her tight enough could extinguish every bit of her pain. "Shhh, shhh...It's all right now. You are a warrior, with the strongest heart I've ever known. You fought her as hard and as long as you could, and you're safe now, that's what matters."

"It's...Everything she did, it's all my fault...!"

"No, no, it's not! It's not. Hakuei-chan, believe me, if you fall into that trap of blaming yourself, you'll never come back out. All of Alma Torran was tricked by her and ruined by her, and there was nothing any of us could do about it until it was too late!" Paimon bit her lip. These were not exactly memories she wanted to be reliving, either. "It's shame and anger and betrayal that never leaves you, I'm sorry to say. What you've lost, you're not going to get back. But you've got your life back now, even if it's not what you knew before. So now you pick yourself back up and move on with it. You do whatever you can. And you can do it with the people who love you."

"You make that sound so easy."

"...No one blames you for what happened, you know. They understand. They know it wasn't you doing any of it."

Hakuei sighed, deep and weary. "Yes, I'm sure that, 'she's possessed by her ancient body-stealing mother who technically isn't really her mother,' was the first conclusion everyone reached when I started doing such terrible things."

"But that wasn't you."

"No, it wasn't. But it was my voice and my face and my form, and that's just as bad. Seishun and Doruji told me, while they were explaining how long I was out, that it took a full year before Aladdin realized that I wasn't me anymore. All of them felt that pain of someone they loved and trusted turning around and treating them like trash, for no reason at all. There's no way around it, and I...I haven't been able to face any of them yet. How can I?"

"Well, you just ask!" If the situation weren't so serious, Paimon would have giggled. "You've done all right with me tonight, haven't you?"

"Do you think so?"

"Of course I do! If you need me to be with you while you go to them, then I'll be right there by your side. But it is something you need to do. You can't keep avoiding your family forever. You want to be with them again, don't you?"

"Yes...Yes, I absolutely do, I love them all more than anything, but I...I don't know whether it can be the same anymore. They've kept me in the dark about so many things, for so long. I don't know what Kouen or any of them really thought of me, and Hakuryuu..." She snorted. "Hakuryuu acts like everything's just perfect now. But the last time we talked...He made it clear that he never fully trusted me, that there's plenty he blames me for. He's had time to move on from the way he used to be, that much is clear. And it makes me happy to see him, and proud, but...That was time that I lost. I'm still lost. And I don't know where I am in my own family and my own home anymore."

Paimon nodding, continuing to stroke Hakuei's hair as she explained. "That's not something I have an easy answer for, I'm afraid. The only thing to do for it is to brace yourself and take the plunge."

"...Yes, I figured as much," Hakuei admitted. "I suppose it is the obvious answer. But still...It scares me, more than it should."

"To tell you the truth, they're just as nervous to talk to you. They're worried they'll accidentally hurt you more. They don't know how you're feeling, and they should. You'll all feel better once you've got everything out in the open."

"It won't be a one-and-done thing. This...This is going to take time."

"That's right. No one's going to rush you." Paimon paused. "I'll make sure of it."

"Arba told me so many things over the past three years. She had so many stories, so many tricks, it's going to take so long just to parse out what was the truth and what was just another lie." Hakuei swallowed hard. "I need to talk to Hakuryuu, if no one else. She taunted me about what she did to him, but she'd also laugh about how she could be lying about the...the worst things she talked about, and I...I just have to know what was going on. What nobody thought I could know."

Paimon nodded, wishing fervently that she'd been paying more attention herself. Family discord, especially on the degree that royal families' tended to escalate to, was not something she was well versed in. "We'll put together what you want to ask about, and go from there, all right? We've got time now, no one's going to hurt us anymore. The world's feeling like a pretty friendly place lately, after all."

Hakuei smiled at that, resting her head on Paimon's shoulder. "That has been a relief. You know, I think that's the part of all this that I'd like in my head before I go to sleep tonight."

"Yeah, this seems like a nice place to break for the night," Paimon agreed, glancing out the bedroom window at the golden full moon and stars. Those, at least, were still perfectly intact. She rolled over onto her side, taking an unresisting Hakuei with her. For a moment, she allowed herself to bask in the peace of the moment: in the dark and the quiet, wrapped in cool, soft silks and satins, with her beautiful queen safe and soothed in her arms. She would protect this peace, Paimon swore to herself, she would protect her queen with her own life.

"I've always found it best to sleep on things like this, anyway," Hakuei murmured, snuggling up closer to Paimon, who wondered if Hakuei knew exactly how quickly that made her heart melt. "If you don't mind...Would you keep doing that with my hair? It feels so nice."

"Oh, I absolutely would not mind," Paimon assured, stroking from the top of her head down to the back of her neck, slow and rhythmic.

"You know..." Hakuei smiled against Paimon's collarbone, looking as if she'd like to laugh. "I used to keep you under my pillow. Your Vessel, I mean."

At that, Paimon really did giggle. "Is that so?"

"Yes. If I'd wake up in the middle of the night, I'd just reach under and feel the feathers, the gold trim, and it would help me fall back to sleep. It was nice, knowing you were there even if I couldn't talk to you."

"Glad to be of service. Then and now." With her free hand, Paimon gently traced the bruise-like shadows under Hakuei's eyes. "You haven't been getting much sleep lately, have you?"

Hakuei's smiled faded, and she pressed her forehead against Paimon's shoulder. "I...I dream of her. Every night I think I'm back with her. It's...suffocating."

Paimon leaned down to kiss Hakuei's forehead, as she had the first time they'd met, without thinking. It felt like the most natural thing in the world to do, and Hakuei seemed to calm immediately. "It'll be okay. I'll keep every nightmare away from you. I'm here now, I'll be here with you as long as you'll have me."

And just like that, the smile returned to Hakuei's face. Her answer did not come in words; at least, not right away. Instead, she wrapped a hand around the back of Paimon's head, and moved to close the short distance between them and press her lips softly against Paimon's. Letting out a surprised and excited "Mmf?!" was pure reflex on Paimon's part, but then again, so was kissing back, deeply and lovingly.

When after what felt like forever and at the same time, nowhere near long enough, Hakuei pulled back and looked up at Paimon, her eyes shone. "Then I suppose you'll be staying forever, then?"

In answer, Paimon turned around to blow out the single candle on the nightstand, and tugged the blankets over the two of them as she laid back down. She cuddled Hakuei close, their legs entwining under the thick, soft fabric, basking in the pure sensation of each other's bodies. How long, she wondered, had she dreamed of this?

"That sounds just perfect to me."