a/n: Hey, Hey! Thanks for stopping by and reading this. This is going to be the first story I've posted on here, so don't forget to review and tell me how I'm doing, kay-kay?
Oh, and FTR, I can only wish that I owned all the sexy superstars in this story, but sadly, all I own is this blue candy cane:c...
Ooh, wait, I have a white pitbull puppy named sheamus, does that count for anything?...What? Nothing AT ALL?
Damnit, well then he can carry his lil old shitty ass back where he came from...
I sit staring into my binder, a pen in my hand pressed to the lined paper. Have I mentioned I've been sitting here like this for at least 20 minutes? Do you know how hard it is to sit still for that long? I sigh and for what feels like the billionth time, I reread the first paragraph of "New Adventures, Old Surrendered", if I even leave that as the title.
"You know for words to appear, your hand has to move across the page, right?"
I groan at the sudden voice and the person who's hot breath is wetting my ear as they lean over my shoulder.
"And you know that for your breath not to stink, the toothbrush has to move across your teeth, right?"
"Hmphf. You're a mean little shit,"
"So I've been told. Now, what the hell do you want, Christina?" I ask turning to face my oldest Canadian blonde, not shocked to find him glaring me.
"It's Chris, and I actually came up here to try and help your lazy ass with the story,"
"I am not lazy,"I scoff,"I just can't think of anything fot this story in particular..."
"What are you talking about? This is the only story you're working on!" Chris says motioning tot the ahem...one page I have written for 'New Adventures, Old Surrendered'.
"Not true!" I deny. Chris puts his hand on his hip and rolls his eyes at me. Sweet. Now even my musi give me attitude.
I narrow my eyes and my lips pirse into a thin line as I grab my other full 2 inch binder and chuck it at his head, hoping I catch him in the temple.
Of course though, he catches it.
That bastard.
"What the hell' this?" He asks, quickly leafing through the binder.
"That is the nearly completed 23 chapters of book two of the Jojo and Danny adventure series, five christmas oneshots featuring you, Evan, Mike,
Jomo, Kane,Big show, and more; the first three chapters of a story I have going for John, and Randy, and more! Bouche!" I brag snapping my fingers in Chris' face.
He furrows his brow at me and starts skimming some of the stories.
"So, basically what you're saying is that you have the second book of a series finished, yet you haven't even gotten halfway done with the first chapter of the first book, and you've finished several other stories, yet you haven't posted ANY of them?"
"Correct,"
"And you don't see any holes in the fashion in which you're posting these stories?"
"Why should she? The stories are awesome, everything's already done. I mean, who really reads the first book anyway? It's just like an instruction manual anyway-and evryone knows no one reads instruction manuals," Jojo, my oc blabs as she walks in, reddish brown hair tied back in a side ponytail.
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't you the same person who ran away from home in the middle of the night, caught several busses to get to Florida so that you and your cousin, Danny, could crash summerslam in an attempt to score jobs in the WWE's main roster?" Chris asks her,
plopping down next to me on the bed, his head in my lap.
I wait for Jojo's reaction as she sits in my vanity ,going through several drawers, pulling out green eye shadow and other cosmetics.
"Yeah, that was me, and your point is?"
"You don't exactly think things through too much, do you?"
"I do too! I'll have you know, I thought out every last detail of that plan, from departure to arrival, all the way to break in!"
"I higly doubt that," Chris says as he tries his hardest to surl into a damned ball like an armadillo and fit into my lap.
"Creepily enough, Jojo did actually plot out everything before we left. Sure, she might have written out this whole elaborate plan on a restaurant napkin in about 15 minutes the day before we left, but the obsessive little chick did indeed plot out every detail. Except for what would happen after we invade the ppv," Danny interrupts as she just strolls on into my room and begins digging through my vanity alongside her cousin.
" Yeah, can't really predict that type of thing exactly. We'll either get hired on the spot, sent back to the foster homes, or get sent to jail for disrupting one of a million dollar company's prime events of the year, breaking and entering, assaulting several of their workers-"
"Don't forget theft," Chris interjects, finally satisfied with his position on my lap: his arms wrapped around my neck, head wresting on ,my shoulder, and his legs dangling over my knee.
"Well, that one wasn't exactly theft. They did return the car...even if it wasn't in previous condition," I correct. Chris looks up at me dumbfounded.
"You let them steal a car? I was just talking about the backstage passes!"
"Hey, We found those passes!" Danny shouts over her shoulder, still gathering stuff from my vanity.
""Yeah...in Vince Mcmahon's office..." I can just hear the smirk in Jojo's voice as she continues to go through drawers.
"Besides, the car was for Del Rio. I figured that since he was so damn rich he could afford to let my girls borrow just one of his cars for a little while," I reason. Chris just shrugs.
I look over to Danny and Jojo and Danny is whispering in into Jojo's while Jojo finally finishes gathering stuff from my vanity. They turn around and start to leave and I see all that they have: Danny has about eight cans of colored hair spray; some of them orange, brown, yellow,
but most green; some eyeliner pencils and styling gel. Jojo has an orange head scarf, some scissors, a large cardboard box, and what scares me, a razor. Jojo looks up at me.
"Hey, do you have a hot glue gun?"
"Now you know damn well that you ain't getting anything with the words "hot" or "gun" in it. And what for, and why do you have that razor?"
"I'm gonna shave my legs and Can we get a Sheamus muse?" This bitch just changed the subject on me. That means...Damnit!
They're conspiring again!
"Great, they're conspiring, as if we weren't all traumatized enough from Brittany Spears,"
"Hey! I happen to like Brittany Spears! Now get your big 6 something, 200 whatever pound ass off my lap!" I scold, puching Chris off my lap and flailing onto the floor.
"Yeah, I know this fact all too damn well," Chris growls from the floor. I poke my tongue out at him before looking back at Jojo.
"Why do you want a sheamus muse?"
"Because, that's a huge, SEXY, white man,"
"But you two are constantly at each other's throats in your story,"
"We've got a love-hate relationship,"
"That explains why even though you mess with him every chance you get, and he won't hesitate to whoop your ass, if anyone else lays a finger on you outside of a match, he's on 'em like herpes on a ho,"
"...0.o..."
"...0_0..."
"You can't have a Sheamus muse,"
"Wha-Why not? You let Marisol have Randy!"
"No I didn't. I needed Orton for YOUR story and this other one I have going for him and John. She just so happens to have claimed and ensalved him, and BESIDES that, you're conspiring. Conspiring musi don't get large, sexy, white men,"
"Well, then can I get a large, sexy, black man?"
"Jojo, where are you going with that razor?"
"I tolds you, I'm gonna shave my legs," Damnit, she's good at this game.
"Jojo, you better not shave anyone's head with that and you DEFINATLEY BETTER NOT HURT ANYONE! I can't handle anymore injuries or social workers coming to my door demanding why all my musi have deep gashes and broken bones!"
" I'm not shaving anyone's head, Mickey, I promise,"
"Fine. I'll let you do whatever the hell it is you're plotting so long as you don't replace anything in the fridge, molest Cody, interfere in one of my stories or shave anyone's head. Especially, that last one, got it?"
"Yup"
"Un-huh,"
"Alright, then get!"
The two of them shuffle on out of my room smirking. I hate it when my musi smirk. It means they're up to something completely retarded that only someone under the influence, or them would do. That also means, I'm gonna have to play gown up and clean up their mess and pull out the bandaids and extra strength tylenol.
"You're really goiing to let them go without even tryimg to find out what it is they're planning?"
"So long as they follow the five simple rules I gave them, I honestly don't give a shit until I can finish this chapter,"
"That's reasonable, but you do realize that you already have a Sheamus muse, right,"
"Of course I do. how could I not realize that big sexy thing was in my house? But, I do plan on keeping Jojo ignorant to this little detail for as long as possible,"
"That won't be too long,"
"Oh, trust me, it will be a long time, before she finds him,"
"How do you figure,"
"Come with me, we'll go and see a place called Barrett's closet!"
We step into Wade's small compact closet and close the door.
"Why are we in Wade's closet?"
"Because this is where Sheamus' room is!" I inform, feeling around the back wall for the doorknob.
"Why is Sheamus' room in a closet, and in this douchebag's no less?"
"You're so mean. You do realize that this is your former protege your calling a douchebag, right?" Chris just shrugs.
"His room is in here because Jojo would never look in here,"
"Pssht, yeah right. Jojo's nosy as hell, this'd probably be the first place she'd look,"
"Not necessarily, You see, Jojo's convinced that Wade's clothes are covered in poisonous evil squirrel piss that'll melt her insides and leave just a pile of skin,"
"0.o"
My hand brushes over the knob and I push open the door. I see Sheamus lying in his bed, typing on his laptop.
"Hey Stephen," I smile walking in.
"Hey, Princess, come here," He smiles at me and schooches over for me to lay down next to him. I crawl in and snuggle up next to him as he wraps an arm around me.
"Whatchya working on?"
"It' s a secret,"
"Friends don't keep secrets,"
"Well this secret is a surprise for you,"
"Ooh...can I see?"
"But then it won't be a surprise!"
"Sure it will,just give her a few days and she'll forget she ever even came in here," Chris says plopping down on the other side of me, squishing me between him and Sheamus.
"Nah, I have a feeling she'll remember this one,"
"Hm, well let me see and I'll tell you,"
"Kay," Sheamus places one of his meaty hands over my eyes and it's so big it covers my whole face, so there's no damn way I'll see what's on that laptop as he passes it over my lap to Chris. There's a few minutes of silence as Chris reads whatever Sheamus had done and he passe it back over my lap to Sheamus.
"Oh, you're right, she's definately not going to forget that one antyime soon!"
"See what I mean?"
"Yeah, man, that was great,"
I growl, pissed that neither chris or Sheamus will tell me what's going on. The dirty bastards.
Sheamus finally takes his hand off my face as he shuts his laptop and staresd at me grining. I glare at him.
"I don't like my musi being secretive. It leads me to believe that they're conspiring. I've already got Danny and Jojo conspiring, I don't need the two of you conspiring too!"
Sheamus barks out a laugh.
"Don't worry, we're not conspiring. And besides, I'll show you when it's done, and I promise you, you'll love it. Okay, princess?" He asks me.
I look back and forth between him and Chris. These bastards are smirking at me. They're either amused or planning to molest me. Either way,I don't like something occurs to me...
"Looky! We make an inside out oreo!:3"
"0_o"
"o_0"
Sheamus furrows his brow and opens his mouth to say something but instead of his accent and calm voice, we hear a loud shriek.
"Jojo, Danny, I'm going to MAIM the both of you!"
"Mike, don't you lay a hand on them, I need those two for my story!" I yell through the open door.
I hear several loud footsteps running through the house before Danny and Jojo burst through the open door, Mike hot on their tails.
He's seething as he glares down at Danny and Jojo who are giggling on the side of me.
"I really don't give a shit, they screwed up big this time!" He growls.
"What did they do, and what's up with the hat? I don't think Shawn'll like that you took his cowboy ha-"
My words fail me as he throws away the hat.
"They shaved my head!"
My gaze turns from shocked as I stare at Mike's head, to killer as I glare over at the culprits. Jojo smiles sheepishly.
"Oh...look..hehe..a Sheamus muse?" Again, she tries to change the subject and my eyes double in size as I glare at them.
The room is quiet and filled with a tense air as I glare them down and they try their damndest to torn invisible. Danny decides to test her luck.
"Umm, sorr-"
"YOUR ASSES ARE MINE YOU DIRTY BITCHES!"
"RUN!"
Okey Smokes! Thanks again for reading, and you know what? To make me reaaal happy...press that lil button down there that says review and I'll send you all a bag of bag of boiled crawfish! Just give me a place to meet you, and I promise I'll make you reeeaall satisfied...with the crawfish I mean...:p!
