It started after the first attempt. Inukai slammed the door hard behind her, I'd been listening to music on my bed, but the noise had me sitting up with a start, pulling the headphones from my ears.
"Someone's angry…"
"Shut up."
"What happened?"
"That little brat." The words seething, a strong kick sent a chair flying.
She paced angrily, I stood, putting my hands on her shoulders to cease the movement. "Quit banging shit around like a pouting toddler and answer me."
"Azuma interfered!" It came out as a huff.
A smirk crept onto my face as my arms fell to my side, "So, you're just a sore loser?"
"Shut up!"
"And if I don't?"
A flash of challenge arose in her eyes before her eyebrows lifted, seemingly with an idea.
A small, cocky grin of mischief grew in place of what was a frown. And as quickly as I could comprehend that I'd triggered something, Isuke pushed me backwards onto my mattress, sitting on top of me. I stuttered, "What the hell-"
She leaned over me, attacking my lips. I tried to push her off, but her insane leg power kept her rooted. I didn't know what to feel or think. "The fuck are you doing, Inukai!"
She eyed her pink fingernails as if they were interesting, answering in a bored manner. "I want sex."
Way to be blunt. "It doesn't have to be with me!"
"It's a matter of circumstantial availability. You're conveniently here, somewhat attractive, and I'm horny."
I propped my torso up with my elbows. "That's it?"
She rolled her eyes, "I'm offering a one time opportunity for hate sex. Do you want to fuck or not?"
A sigh of defeat escaped, "Whatever."
I kept my face calm despite my own thoughts. This spoiled little girl has not known struggle in years, it was a fact that made me bitter, but I hid the sour taste her tongue left in my mouth by gripping her hips & flipping us. I dedicated my attention to my own desires, for once, I wanted to be selfish like her. My hands worked on tossing my clothes to the side, Isuke did the same.
We didn't give room to argue, instead as soon as the barriers between us were gone, we devoured each other. I went for her neck, sucking on her skin, she pushed my pelvis down against her, grinding into me. My mouth worked its way to her breasts, I bit down on her pert nipple just enough to be painful and pleasurable at the same time, a gasp only encouraged me.
It was a hair pulling, borderline sadistic, demeaning involvement. Neither of us came. It almost seemed a form of debate, our bodies unsatisfied and frustrated. Eventually our hands had nothing left to say. We would be bruised, bitten, and covered in hickeys, but the pain was solidified outside ourselves. That's something we both needed.
We weren't lovers. We were strangers filled with angst & resentment.
After a what seemed like hours, we'd ground to a halt. Isuke on top of me, not looking at me but at the wall, I was counting the ceiling tiles trying to block out my own self-reproach. I guess she didn't have as difficult a time when it came to moving on because it was ten minutes before she left me to my thoughts, retreating to the bathroom.
Why did I go along with that?
It was a night we pretended never happened for weeks afterward. But it was always in the back of my mind, always in the way we avoided each other's gazes. Then my sister called.
"Haruki, mom got worse. She's in the ICU, you need to come home." I can't.
Is this karma? The weight of all the people I had murdered slammed into me. It doesn't hurt…after everything I've done…why can't I feel anything?
I want to experience guilt, pity, grief, rage. The last time I did was…with Inukai.
And suddenly, a switch flipped somewhere in me.
I waited until knob turned. Isuke's eyebrow raised at me. She could tell I was anticipating her.
The lock clicked into place, but I'd already jumped up, lust blocking out rational thought. Isuke's back slammed against the door, my body pressed against hers as our lips crashed together, teeth bumping. Pain registered as I was yanked back by my hair just enough to separate us.
She scowled at me, "I said once."
My scalp was on fire, despite it, I didn't flinch or struggle. This is what you wanted Haruki. "In your words, do you want to fuck or not?" You wanted someone to tell you what to do, to be brutally honest, maddeningly self-consumed. This way you don't have to pretend.
I don't have the answers. I'm not working part time to put that food on the table. I hate myself. Isuke is my counterpart. And she has all the money she'd ever need on top of it.
"I'll do anything you wish." "Really?" "Yes."
"Go down on me then." A glimmer of whimsy covered most of the inquisition. Not enough though. Inukai released me from her death grip. I kissed her roughly, unzipping her leather top for access.
I caressed her breast just long enough to tease before sliding down her pale, flat stomach, stopping at her purple patterned skirt. I dropped to my knees, moving to get rid of those ridiculously long boots. My teeth sunk into her porcelain thigh enough to draw blood, the metallic tang diluting the taste of her skin. My hands retreated under the fabric of her uniform, only leaving with the slightly older woman's thong, a shade to match her hair, one lost somewhere between cotton candy and hot pink.
"Put your leg over my shoulder." I moved closer to her, my eyes level with her adorable naval. Adorable?
Inukai didn't move so I did it for her, Isuke wasn't that heavy. Bracing her against the wall, I dove under the cotton hem, dragging my tongue across her clit. The moans that erupted were encouraging as I switched between tracing patterns into her skin.
Her hands searched for something to grab, only finding my head. That's when the scary ideas began.
Instead of fistfuls of locks, her fingers would be trailing the strands gingerly, and she would call me by my first name, begging to make it last. To never let it end, because in the morning we'd be far apart again.
Why do I have to like this so much?
Isuke's hands pushed me closer to her, I lapped her walls, feeling for that special spot. "Sagae, oh," a gasp, "Shit!" Foundit. I focused my assault.
Her hips rolled, pushing me deeper, her body started to convulse lightly, as if she were a shook up can of soda, pressurized and about to explode. I pulled back.
A whimper stirred something within me, Isuke didn't need me to get off, but she did want me. "What the fuck are you doing?" The words came between pants for air.
I moved her to the small table in the middle of the room, setting her bare ass on top. "Command me, princess."
Inukai likes to run things. That's fine by me, for once I don't have be the one making all the decisions.
For a second, Isuke seemed…flustered, almost. It was something of a surprise to me, but I suddenly felt that I wasn't meant to see it, that if I dwelt on it, I'd regret it. Then her cockiness resurfaced, covering up the speck of vulnerability.
I wish I hadn't seen it.
"Finish what you started!"
I parted her legs, stepping between them. Her small black hairs were lasered to a strip. "Cute," a chuckle escaped my grasp earning a kick to the shin. "Ow!"
Her patience was waning, "Don't gawk, snap to it if you ever want to do this again."
I pulled her hips forward, my left hand playing with her breast, the right reaching between us, my mouth went to work marking her collarbone. "Touch me." I responded like a well trained pup, my fingers curling inside her. She moved in rhythm with me, gripping the back of my shirt.
"Suc-," Not waiting for her to complete the demand, I already had her nipple rolling between my lips, "Ah, fuck!" I suppressed my smugness, quietly reprimanding my actions.
You're using each other. That's all this is and you shouldn't be proud of it.
She fell against the wood, unable to hold herself up anymore. "If you stop now," a breath was sucked in, "I will kill you."
My knuckle must've brushed something good because Isuke's back arched, eyes dazed, a loud moan ringing out, I did it again, her legs wrapped around my waist, the table rocked with us. I tasted sweat on her jawline as I kissed it. My heart felt like it contracted and time stopped there, just like that.
Her body craving mine, hair slightly matted, skin glistening, clothes tousled and half off, eyes shut, in pure ecstasy.
This narcissistic pink haired sadist can be really breathtaking.
She yelled out, "Oh, god!" Fluid washed over my palm signaling her orgasm, I slowed my pace, not in a hurry. After some recovery time, she propped herself onto her elbows, sight cloudy, looking at me as if there was something she wanted to say, but decided otherwise, changing whatever it was to, "Your turn, huh."
Her slender, manicured hands started fiddling with the buttons on my uniform…but now…I almost felt sick. I couldn't look at her. "No, stop."
"I'm not so pathetic as not to reward y-"
I grabbed her wrists gently. "It's okay. Just stop. I'm not really feeling it." A lie. Of course I lied. Stepping back, I couldn't meet her expression.
Shame. That was the word for it. I thought it wouldn't matter. That it wouldn't bother me as much because it's Inukai. I should've learned the first time because suddenly, there was another reason I didn't want to risk going further.
I didn't want to stop. I wanted to say, "You look stunning like this & I'm afraid to let myself feel anything positive towards you."
