I don't wanna know your name
'Cause you don't look the same
The way you did before
O.K. you think you got a pretty face
But the rest of you is out of place
You looked alright before
F-FOXY FOX ON THE RUN-
"Carrots, come on!" Nick groaned loudly over the hum of the vacuum cleaner he was pushing across the living room carpet. "We have an entire playlist full of songs, why do you have to keep playing that one?"
"What's the matter, Slick?" Judy replied from the kitchen, her big bunny feet tapping on the linoleum floor as she dragged a mop back and forth across the increasingly shiny surface. "Don't like a song that was written specifically for you?"
"Oooh, shots fired!" came the dim voice of the eighteen-year-old red fox from down the hall.
An imperceptible but playful growl emanated from Nick's throat at Joseph's comment. "Laugh it up, fuzzball!" he called back to his adopted son. "The song's as much about you as it is about me."
"You keep telling yourself that, Nick," the kit responded as he rounded the hallway corner, a feather duster in his paw and a wry smirk on his muzzle.
"And besides," the elder reynard continued as though Joseph hadn't spoken, "I like the song, just not fifteen times in a row."
"Fine, fine, I'll move to the next one," Judy said to her boyfriend, slipping her phone from her pocket and giving the screen a few quick taps. The sound of Sweet's Fox on the Run was abruptly cut off from where it emanated from the large Bluetooth speaker on the kitchen counter, and was promptly replaced by the opening chords of Redbone's Come and Get Your Love. "Is that better, you big dumb fox?" the bunny said as she slid the device back into the pocket of her ZPD sweatpants.
"Much better," Nick said to her, his big bushy tail almost involuntarily beginning to wag to the beat of the new song.
"Judy, I gotta say, you do have killer taste in music," said Joseph as he began to sweep the feather duster across the tops of the picture frames in the hallway. He gave a little sneeze as some of the dust particles found there way into his nostrils, and both Nick and Judy couldn't help but find the sound adorable. "That's a pretty awesome mix you've got there."
"Well, technically, it's my awesome mix," said Nick. "My mom actually made me a few mixtapes when I was little of a bunch of the music from my childhood and when she was young. That's what this playlist is."
"Oh, that's so sweet!" replied Joseph. "My mom liked classic rock alot. She'd always have it blasting when she was…" The kit's sentence trailed off abruptly into silence as a far-away look crossed his face.
"When she was what?" Judy asked curiously as she dug the mop into a large grease spot on the kitchen floor.
"When she was getting black-out drunk at home," Joseph finished, his voice deadpan. "I still can't listen to Air Supply without feeling anxious," he said, his words hardly audible.
"Oh," Judy replied, not sure how else to respond.
Nick felt his heart begin to ache at his son's words. "Jeez, buddy," he said to him, considering abandoning the vacuum where it stood and wrapping the kit in a hug. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."
"Nah, it's fine," Joseph said dismissively as he returned to his dusting with increased vigor. "The past is in the past. I'm just thankful that now I get to make some new memories with you guys. Better memories."
A warm smile spread across Nick's muzzle at the statement. He could have remained silent, but his sly jokester side forced him to make a comment. "And some pretty good memories with Jamie, am I right, bud?" he said to the kit, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.
"Nick," Judy interjected, a playful but stern edge to her voice, "remember, that's my sister you're talking about."
"What did I say?" Nick asked, a faux expression of defensiveness on his muzzle. "All I said was they were making some pretty good memories-"
"Ah, but the implication was there," Joseph said, wagging an orange-furred finger at his father. "Jamie and I aren't making...those kinds of memories."
"Not yet, anyway," Nick replied in a low voice-unfortunately for him, though, not low enough for Judy.
"Nicholas Piberius Wilde," the rabbit said dangerously, "one more innuendo out of you-"
"And I'll be sleeping on the couch, yeah, Carrots, I know the drill." With that, the fox clamped his muzzle shut and resumed his vacuuming.
It was a few minutes later, during the second verse of "Hooked on a Feeling", that Joseph spoke up again. His voice was a bit tired, his tongue flitting in and out of his mouth as he panted.
"Jeez, Judy, I know winter is coming, but could ya turn down the heat a little?" he asked of her. "I'm barely doing anything and I feel like I'm roasting over here."
"I've already got it at 62 degrees," the lagomorph replied, her gray-furred paws working to rinse out her mop. "If I turn it down any lower we might as well open the windows."
Nick put himself into the conversation as he unplugged the vacuum cleaner, his paws beginning to expertly wrap up the long black cord. "It's probably just your winter coat, Joseph," he said to the kit.
"My what now?" Joseph responded. "Nick, I'm wearing a t-shirt, not a coat."
A throaty chuckle emanated from Nick's muzzle at his son's words. "No, buddy, your winter coat of fur. It's November so that means your fur is starting to come in thicker and faster for winter. We mammals might have evolved enough to start wearing clothes, but our bodies still seem to act otherwise."
"Oh," Joseph replied, wondering why he hadn't realized that sooner. "Well, it looks like I'm gonna be having a warm winter, then."
"Well, we could always trim you down," Judy offered.
"Very funny, Jude," Joseph replied jokingly.
"No, I'm serious, Joseph," the bunny said. "Most mammals do it around this time anyway."
"Yeah, didn't you guys do that where you come from, buddy?" Nick asked.
"Uh, no," the kit replied. "Humans really only have hair on the tops of their heads. Males usually have more, especially on their face, but nowhere near as much as animals do."
"So you never learned to trim your fur?" Nick inquired.
Joseph shook his head. "Nope," he said. "Didn't have any fur to trim, except on my face."
A sly but simultaneously loving smile lit up Nick's face. "Well," he said, slowly walking up to his adopted son and clapping a paw on his shoulder, "we'll have to remedy that, won't we? Can't have you go walking around with twelve inches of super-soft fur on you-no matter how much Jamie might like it."
"Nick-" Judy began to say.
"Oh, don't pretend you're not all about the fox floof, Carrots," the fox said teasingly. "You've been cuddling my tail every night for the last two weeks." The blush that roared through his girlfriend's ears told Nick that he would get no more lip from her on the matter. "C'mon buddy," he said to Joseph, wrapping his arm around his shoulders and guiding him towards the apartment's bathroom, "let's get that fluff of yours trimmed down."
"Uh, can't we go to a barber for that?" the kit said, a little awkwardly.
"Not for the first time, you can't," Nick replied, pulling his razor set from underneath the bathroom sink and beginning to assemble it. "It's a right of passage, trimming your coat for the first time, especially among predators." His paws slowed for a moment in their assembly of his fur trimmer as he thought back to the first time he had trimmed his own fur, his father's strong paws guiding his own as he slid the razor over the fur of his chest. "My dad, uh...my dad always said that it was a kind of, uh, bonding moment. Y'know, between a father and his son."
Joseph blinked, a little surprised at the sudden tenderness in Nick's voice. "Really?" he asked him.
"Yeah," Nick said as he plugged the razor in. Not hearing a response from Joseph, he lifted his emerald eyes to his son's amber ones, suddenly worried that he was being too pushy. "This-this isn't weird, is it, Joe?" he asked him, a little nervously. "I mean, I'm not making you uncomfortable, am I? 'Cause, if you'd rather just go to a barber, we could totally-"
"No," Joseph said abruptly, his voice set like stone. "No, I...I wanna do this with you, Nick," he said. A glowing smile split the kit's face as looked at his father. "You are my dad, after all."
Nick had to shut his eyes for a moment and collect himself when Joseph said that, doing his best not to let the flood of emotion surging through him show on his face. "That...that means a lot to me, buddy," was all he could say. Joseph simply smiled back at him. After a few seconds, Nick cleared his throat. "Okay," he said. "So, you're gonna wanna take your shirt off, 'cause that's where the fur is thickest, on your chest and back and shoulders."
"Sure," Joseph said, quickly slipping the red t-shirt over his head and hanging it on the back of the door. His sensitive hearing caught the change of songs from the kitchen, the gentle strum of guitar strings resounding through the apartment as a new tune began.
It's not time to make a change,
Just relax, take it easy
You're still young, that's your fault,
There's so much you have to know
Find a girl, settle down,
If you want you can marry
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy
"So, you've never done anything like this before, then?" Nick asked his son as he positioned the kit in front of the bathroom mirror, standing behind him and looking over his shoulder.
"Not really, no," Joseph replied. "I mean, I've shaved before, but that's not much compared to having a whole body full of fur."
"You shaved? You mean, like, right down to the skin?"
"Yep," the kit replied, a small laugh escaping his lips at Nick's apparent amazement. "Just my face, though. It's kind of similar, actually. Shaving for the first time in the human world is a kind of rite of passage, too. A special day between a father and his son."
I was once like you are now, and I know that it's not easy,
To be calm when you've found something going on
But take your time, think a lot,
Why, think of everything you've got
For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not
"Huh," Nick replied as he turned on the razor. "So, did your dad-
"No," Joseph interrupted, a bitter edge to his voice. "No, my dad-well, my male parent, really, since he didn't do anything a dad was supposed to do-he never taught me how to shave. Was never around enough to do anything a dad should do."
"Oh," said Nick sadly. "God, Joseph, I'm...I'm so sorry. I...don't suppose you mom helped out that much either, huh?"
"Not really, no. Pretty much every day after work she'd get too drunk or high or whatever to know which way was up let alone help me with stuff like that."
How can I try to explain, when I do he turns away again
It's always been the same, same old story
From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away
I know I have to go
Nick couldn't stop a tear from rolling down his cheek at his son's heartbreaking words. "Joe, I-"
"It's fine, Nick," the kit said, not unkindly. "I'm just glad that I have you and Judy now. You two are more than I ever could have hoped for."
Nick smiled warmly at the young fox in the mirror. "Thanks, buddy," he said to him. "Now, let's get this party started, shall we?"
"Let's do it," Joseph said with a smirk.
Nick trimmed the bright orange fur on Joseph's back and shoulders to get started, since most mammals had to have someone else do that anyway. Once the fluff of Joseph's back had been reduced to about a third of its former length, Nick handed the razor to his son.
"Now, it's more than likely you're gonna end up a little uneven in spots," he explained, "especially on your first try, and that's perfectly okay. I still have trouble getting everything looking smooth and sleek sometimes."
"Okay," Joseph replied, turning the razor in his paws so that it was pointed towards the thick white tuft of his chest. "So, I just…?"
"Be careful, now," Nick chided his son as the kit slowly guided the device towards his fur. "You don't wanna go too far down, otherwise you'll end up bald, and trust me, that's very uncomfortable. Just do a little off the top at first in one space, and then keep going until you've got it at the length you're comfortable with."
"Alright," the young reynard said, his voice slightly nervous as he glided the razor across a few centimeters of his chest fur. White fluff immediately began to pile onto the plastic guard on the razor, and Joseph found that he had to brush it off almost every five seconds.
"See, you're doing good, buddy!" Nick said happily. "Just take it slow, don't rush yourself."
It's not time to make a change,
Just sit down, take it slowly
You're still young, that's your fault,
There's so much you have to go through
Find a girl, settle down,
If you want you can marry
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy
Almost half an hour later, the bathroom floor was almost completely obscured by piles of orange and white fur that had fallen from Joseph's upper body. When all the fur above his waist had been trimmed down to about an inch and a half, Joseph switched off the razor and laid it on the sink as Nick playfully grabbed his shoulders, their eyes meeting in the mirror.
"Great job, buddy!" Nick congratulated him. "You did awesome, especially for a first timer. I had flyaways and random tufts all over the place the first time I trimmed my coat."
"Thanks," Joseph said sheepishly as Nick grabbed a brush from beneath the sink, gently beginning to draw it across the now thinner fur of his son's back. "Hey, uh, Nick?"
"Yeah?" the elder vulpine said to him.
"Thank you," Joseph said, his voice quiet. He turned around to face Nick even as he continued to brush him, wanting to look directly into his father's eyes. "Thank you for helping me with this. It...you don't know how much it means to me."
A warm smile spread across Nick's face once more as he set the brush, now forgotten, on the sink. "I'm happy to do it, buddy," Nick replied, laying his paw on Joseph's shoulder. "Happier than you could ever know."
The young fox could feel a lump forming in his throat and tears pressing against the backs of his eyes as he spoke the next words, words that came from the depths of his heart and soul, full to bursting with love and gratitude. "Thank you for being my dad, Nick."
All the times that I cried, keeping all the things I knew inside,
It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it
If they were right, I'd agree, but it's them you know not me
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away
I know I have to go
Fast as lightning, Nick grabbed the freshly-trimmed shoulders of the kit before him and wrapped him in a warm, fuzzy, fatherly hug that nearly knocked the wind out of Joseph. "Always, buddy," Nick told him, beginning to choke up himself. "You remember what I said to you before? You're mine. Mine to me." He gave Joseph a quick, fatherly kiss on the cheek, then pulled back from him to look into his son's tear-filled eyes as paws clasped the kit's face. "No matter where you go, no matter what they may call you, you will always be my son."
A sob tore itself from Joseph's muzzle at the love in Nick's voice, and he couldn't stop himself from pulling his father into yet another hug, letting all the pain and abandonment that he'd felt in his life from his own parents' failing finally slip through his paws like water. Because none of that mattered anymore. All the hurt, all the tears, all the pain he had felt in his whole life meant nothing at all anymore, because Joseph Wilde had found his father. His real father, and the only one he would ever need.
"I love you, Dad," Joseph whispered in Nick's ear, barely able to speak through the happy tears in his eyes. And they both knew in that moment that truer words had never been spoken.
