Forever Unkind
I run my hands up his tight little tummy. The muscles twitch and he giggles. "Stop it that tickles." He wraps his arms in the way. I stop and watch his cheerful face. That smiling is never fading I don't care what I have to do to keep it. Before I would have wiped it clean with one single word, "loser," but now I tiptoe around moments like this making certain my cynical nature doesn't disturb his bliss.
"Hey, Naruto," I think carefully about my next line. Naruto's expression becomes blank. He could be very attentive when he wanted. "Do I make you happy? Am I really important to you?" I feel exposed. I feel vulnerable. I'm not used to feeling this way. I don't like it, yet I cannot escape it.
That serious expression doesn't suit him. His sunflower hair and soft face doesn't allow it. When he wears such a face it's as if the entire world shifts shades to fit that mood. He stares at the ceiling for a moment as I search through every thread of fabric of the bed as I lay on my side. "Sasuke," he extends my name when he speaks it so that every syllable is heard. I adore the way he speaks my name. "I really enjoy being around you. You make me happy. You help me to become greater and you've become the most important person in my life. Even when we were kids I looked to you so I could be like you and be better than you. Now we're here like this and I couldn't be happier." He's spared my heart, but he's acting more insecure than I was. "The only thing is do I make you happy? Am I good enough for you, someone of the Uchiha Clan? The whole village loves you and every girl who sees you follows you around. Even Sakura-chan. Why would you want to be with someone like me?"
"I don't know." I confess. "Maybe because you don't see me as a member of the Uchiha Clan. Or maybe it's because you always somehow manage to make me smile. Maybe you make me feel accepted." It was all true and more. Naruto's eyes welt up. Tears of happiness? "OR maybe it's because you're just good at sucking my cock."
"What did you say?!" Naruto screeches right in my face. It's the one of the only faces I enjoy more than his "happy" one.
"Shut up," I grab the pillow behind me, "dork," and smack him in the face. He pops right back up armed and ready. I sit up. He hauls back and throws with all his might. A lean to the right avoids the might of the fluff. As if. He throws himself at me. We lock hands and struggle back and forth. The little blonde is much stronger than I anticipate, but I'm not surprised. Every time he should be down, out, and outshined he manages to rise up greater than any shinobe. I guess that's another reason why I like him so much. He overpowers me and lays on me. I give up.
"You think I'm good at sucking cock? I'll show you who's good." It's a peculiar threat to be making. He releases my hands and slides down between my knees. I watch as he unzips my shorts and pulls out my already semi-hard member that lengthens in his hand. "We'll see who the dork is when you're screaming my name."
"I'd like to see that." I play along to further encourage him. Determined he pops his mouth right over it as if it were a Popsicle. It makes me jump. One long, hard suck from base to head has me clenching the bed and gritting my teeth. How someone who was so shy when it first came to exploring his sexuality became an expert on oral sex I'll never know. Maybe I was a better teacher than I meant to be? He runs hit tongue up and over the opening then dances it over the crest of the head. He knew just how to drive me wild. I had let it slip one night while he was performing. A man is driven to say anything without thinking at moments like that. That second brain takes complete control. I could now see how some female kunoichi gained such "status" and took overnight missions. My brain drifts up into space as I throbbed in that juicy and dedicated mouth. I had to think of something-anything to keep from calling out and bursting. The warmth of mouth is a comfort to the intensity and his spit tickles as it runs down. Since when was this room so small and blurry and hot? I must focus, but all my senses are set on him and that soft hair that I grab and pull on. His diabolical chuckle vibrates all the way up my spine. I have to come up with someone to think about someone that isn't sexy, but won't emotionally scar me. Sakura? With her hair short like that she's cute. She won't due. Kakashi-sensei? He wears so many layers it's hard to see that built slender frame underneath, but when he's stripped down his body is lined with that skin tight black material that accents every angle. SHIT! That's even worse than thinking about Sakura! I can see Naruto now blushing and touching himself as sweat forms along his brow. He moves rhythmically up and down so I'm making love to his greedy mouth. I can't hold it in any longer. I have to, no, need to explode!
Naruto pulls up in time so only a little of me is dripping from his mouth, but the rest is clinging to his flushed cheek. I snicker then laugh out loud as I relax. "You did that on purpose!" He accuses me.
"Idiot, you're the one with who put his face in the way. What was I supposed to do?" I can't stop chuckling.
"WARN ME!" He makes a good point, but if I would have tried to open my mouth I would have screamed every dirty word circulating in my mind. "You do this all the time. It's not fair!"
"A shinobe must expect the unexpected and learn to anticipate the expected." I don't know if that's the correct saying, but it sounded right so Naruto would believe it. He wipes my cum on his sleeve, folds his arms, and pouts at the edge of the bed. I concede and crawl up behind him. Putting one arm around him I rest my head on his shoulder. "You're right. I'm sorry." He huffs and turns his heads away. "Don't be a big baby." It seems that he's about to throw a tantrum. He really does something to me like sunshine on a cloudy day or fireflies at night. I don't ever see a world without him in it. I should acknowledge the dangers of being a shinobe and realize that many die young, but I can't with him. I wrap my arms around him and press myself close. I don't ever what to see my world without him.
"Sasuke, are you okay?" Naruto coos. I must have left him in silence for a while now.
I move so that my whispers will be muffled by his shoulder. "Naruto, I think that I might be. . . That is I'm in love. . ." The door creaks open slowly. My confession will have to wait. There in the doorway stands a man cast in shadows from the blinding light outside. It's familiar. I know this man. There's a glint in his hand. "Naruto, get down!" You shove him off the bed and fall back on the bed. A piercing pain strikes through my chest and it takes me a moment to breathe. My hand finds solid metal stuck in where my heart should be. The irregular pumps of a muscle trying to work blind me with agony that shoots through every nerve in my chest.
"Sasuke!" Naruto's voice is strained and choking him. He leaps from the floor to my side. "Sasuke." He whispers as his hand finds the bloody object. He's confused as to what to do I know, because I am as well. "Don't worry; I'll get you out of here. I won't let you die. I won't let you die!" His voice warps. The demon inside him, Kyuubi, has been excited. Naruto is about to lose it. I wish I could tell him to stop; calm down, but little grunts are all I can manage. I smell blood from outside and inside of me. Naruto's warmth leaves my side. I can hear him screaming in anger. "How dare you do that to Sasuke! You're supposed to watch over him! What's wrong with you?!" I want him to come back. I want him to help me and bring his warmth to me, but things get quiet. I don't know if it's my body shutting down that causes the quiet or if something has happened to Naruto, but the darker the world gets the quieter it is. Soon there is no sound at all it has all become a void.
Naruto, I think that, no, I know that I'm in love with you.
* 8 * 8 * 8 *
I walk alone at dusk with a heavy backpack slung over my shoulder. Only the necessities build up so fast. It is all mostly weapons. I am an expert at them all. I could kill a man with a chopstick if I wanted, but it doesn't mean I'd enjoy it. Killing becomes a heartless way of life, but I'm not void of a heart as much as I pretend I don't have one. I can never let others know of it. I am a ninja of the Hidden Leaf Village of the Land of Fire. I am a fan to help full the flames. I am a tool.
"Sasuke Uchiha!" An annoying voice calls out from behind me. It disrupts the calm of a perfect night. I don't have time for this fool I have a mission to get to. "I'm calling you out, Sasuke." He's pointing at me I can tell even though my back is to him.
"Why bother? I'm just going to kick your ass. You would have been better off trying to sneak up on me then ambushing me with your shadow clone jutsu, idiot." I explain so that maybe in the future he'll know better. Not like I want my old team member dead.
Naruto sneers and retracts his finger. "Ah, yeah, I was going to do that, but it seemed too obvious." His excuse is lame and as transparent as rice paper just like his brain. "So?"
"So what?" I'm not about to play his immature games.
"Are you going to fight me or are you going to walk away like a coward."
What was this guy talking about? I was already on my way out so how does going to my mission instead of wasting time with him make me a coward? "I don't have time for you Naruto. Nobody does. I have a mission with the ANBU to do. If I'm late they're going to think that Kakashi is rubbing off on me." I dismiss him. There's a pained look in his eyes even though he's enraged. I forget about the feelings of others. I see Naruto all the time running around becoming a closer member of the village. Since being on a team he had become a hidden idle of popularity. He didn't know it, but to those like me who are used to the constant attention it is noticeable. "I'm leaving."
"You think you're so cool, Sasuke! Well, you're not! You don't intimidate me with your "I don't care" attitude and family status. I'm just as good as you. No, I'm better just you see!" He's pushing it.
"You bark loudly for such a little dog. What is it you really want?" My sharingon gleams in the streetlight at him as I peek over my shoulder. It makes his blood chill. It makes the blood chill of everyone who sees it.
"What do I want?" He asks himself caught in my hypnotic eye. He glances down and I know he's not caught in anything, but his own thoughts. Had I hurt him with such a simple question? "I want you. . ." He begins to say and that absent space in my chest skips a beat. "I want you to fight me. I want you to acknowledge me! I will not be ignored, Sasuke." He regains his nerve. No matter how many times he falls down in the race he always manages to bounce back up and keep running even if it means he's going to run right into a brick wall.
In an instant I'm next to him; shoulders practically touching. "So you want me? What makes you think you deserve me? You want my attention just like everyone else in this village, but do you want my attention or the attention of everyone who follows me around?" It's easy to see through people even without these eyes.
Then his answer stuns me. "I want you to acknowledge me. I spent my childhood alone, watching and envying you. I wanted to be just like you, but I'm my own person and I want everyone to know that I'm here because I'm going to become the next hokage." I've heard that last part enough times, but the middle is new. I don't disrupt him. "Even if no one else really respects me I still want the respect of the one person who has pushed me so far. You better come back home, Sasuke, or else you'll miss me exceeding you."
"All that just so you can be better than me?" I scoff at him. "You'll never be better than me, Naruto. But don't worry I will be back. I wouldn't miss a fool like you falling flat on his face." That's right, I'll keep a safe distance. If I didn't come back it would hurt my friend less. "Although, I might not be back for a long while so you'll have to find someone else to pay attention to you."
"I don't need your attention. I'm not one of your fangirls. I probably won't even notice you're gone." Naruto is lying to save face. That would be him to admit something personal then try to cover it up with his dorky, self assured attitude. I wonder how easy it would be to shake that foundation.
"We'll see." I turn my face towards him. He's holding his breath. My lips press against his and though I don't know what I'm doing or why I don't stop. He doesn't try to stop me either. He stands there and feels me once again. That first time at the academy was a clumsy accident, but this time is a conscious enjoyment. To connect this way with another human being makes me never want to let go. I pull away. His expression is of someone who just wet their pants; all blushing and wide eyes. I smirk and turn away. I play with him as if he were a puppet. It's so easy.
"Sasuke," he whispers just loud enough, "You better come back." I pause. I hadn't left him speechless. I left him the same way I just left the shadow of my emotions: longing. I don't answer him. I walk away into the night.
