Seriously, these things just come at the worst moments. I bring you this instead of writing an essay for school. What am I doing with my life?

Disclaimer: I just love writing A for effort Fiyero.

"I don't want to grade these upcoming exams anymore than you want to take them."

I liked to think that my run-ins with Nikidik had aided to him coming to this conclusion.

"The exam will be less than ten questions." At the front of the room, Elphaba was the only one with a blank expression. "It will be cumlative. You'll have the entire time to complete it, and it is my hope that each and everyone of you will pass it."

Elphaba's hand shot up. I'm sure she had a list of complaints, but I had a list of things I could use that free time for. And by free time, I mean time I would have used to try and study. I could run miles and miles. Or stroll around campus. Or start my weekend early. Avaric would like that. Elphaba wouldn't. She would mention something about how I should really take that time to make sure I know the material. Last week, though, she told me that she was worried we weren't seeing enough of our friends. In all seriousness, I knew that it was Nessarose guilt tripping my Jolly Green Goddess into saying that, but where's the harm in holding her to that? I really hadn't been out drinking with Avaric in Oz knows how long. Not to mention my other friends. It's been so long I couldn't even tell you their names. Vacko? Baako? Dakoda? Takoda? I don't even know anymore. This new midterm idea would help me get in touch with my friends again, so while Elphaba stayed after class to talk to Nikidik about doing extra work for her midterm, I went in search of Avaric and company.

Of course, when Monday rolled around, I thought a few times that going out each night this weekend may have been one of my less than bright ideas. The smug smirk on Elphaba's face when Nikidik tossed a ten page packet on my desk made all my nightmares come true.

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All answers must be in Academic Exposition in Ozian Utterance format.

All answers must be roughly words in length.

All answers MUST pertain to the question.

Name: The Winkie

Class: Royalty

Date: Monday

1. List the three states of matter and briefly describe one property from each.

The Vinkus: Kiamo Ko is the castle in which the ruling family lives in. The village surrounding it is responsible for its financing, and in return, the ruling family ordains a special protection over the village's inhabitants. This is because the people living in the village do not belong to any of the three major tribes of the state (although, for future, reference, we prefer to be called a country), so we make sure no one snags them for their lack of identity.

Muchkinland: They have a lot of cornfields. They are well known for their agriculture and livestock. They have really good corn.

Gillikin: Galinda's closet. It deserves its own post office.

2. Briefly describe cell division.

There is a wall, and it divides cells among each other. There is another wall, and it divides all the cells from the outside world. Finally, there is a cell with a gated door on each remaining side of each cell, and that divides the cells from the people in charge.

3. Discuss the laws of segregation and independent assortment.

Way back in the day, citizens of each providence in Oz weren't allowed to settle anywhere but their homeland, consort with anyone but their fellow countrymen, and really weren't allowed to do anything but be stuck up regionalists. But now it's illegal to keep them for doing what they please and mingling. Those who assort independently are technically called 'nomads'.

4. Discuss the processes of cleavage, gastrulation, and neurulation in the frog embryo; tell what each process accomplishes.

This is a trick question. Frogs are flat-chested.

5. What environmental conditions would favor sexual reproduction? Explain.

With the intent of producing a little baby Fiyero: A bedroom. A bedroom is the most comfortable option for both involved parties considering the nine months that follow. She'll be carrying around my heir for nine months, and I'll have to put up with her carrying around my heir. So a bedroom would be the best environment for sexual reproduction with the intent of a baby.

6. What environmental conditions would favor asexual reproduction? Explain.

It depends on the asexual. What if they have no desire to carry on their genes? Then no environment. If they do, you have to consider what they want and what will make them feel comfortable. The act of sexual reproduction is already something that they have no drive for, so for the reproduction of an asexual, their desires are the most important environment.

7. Describe the light reactions of photosynthesis and, for both a C3 and a C4 plant, trace the path of a carbon dioxide molecule from the point at which it enters a plant to its incorporation into a glucose molecule. Include leaf anatomy and biochemical pathways in your discussion of each type of plant.

No.

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"I bet you wish you would have stayed in this weekend." Elphaba smirked as I walked out of the classroom frowning.

"No," I told her as I took her satchel and slung it over my shoulder. "I wish I would have never signed up for this class."

She laughed at me, "Why did you enroll in it to begin with? Science isn't exactly your area of expertise."

"You'd be surprised how influential you are."

"No, not really." She laughed again and took her satchel back, "Afterall, I'm the one who convinced Nikidik to make it an essay exam."

I groaned as she kissed my cheek and hurried off to her next class.

I should have played sick.

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