Author's note 1: I do not own- or will ever own- Glee and I just like to play with their lovely characters. Authors note 2: Kurt's mom's name has not been mentioned on the show as far as I know (feel free to comment her real name if it has and I'll change it) so I just named her Linda. Hope it is not too distracting. Enjoy!
Linda had Kurt early, far too early. Linda was barely 32 weeks along when she started feeling uncomfortable during the evening, and by the early time that the early morning started she was full on screaming. Just a day before I was wondering if I was even ready to be a good father, but I figured I still had times to sort things out... it seems Kurt had other plans.
The ride to the hospital was stressful to say the least. Usually Linda was so calm and soothing when she was talking to the baby in her belly; she would talk about her day or even sing her favourite songs to it. Now she was crying and begging for the baby to stop. "Baby, please, "Linda gasped, "I understand your antsy but please just stop!" Then she started to cry.
I never drove so quickly in all my life.
Linda had made me watch many baby shows during her pregnancy. "Oh, but A Baby story is adorable!" But those shows were never like this. Those couples got to stay together. They got to discuss their last minute baby names, they got to be impatient as the slow dilation process was taking forever; the women got to scream at the doctor for a epidural while the husband got to stand by awkwardly.
These shows didn't show the doctors looking alarmed before they took the wife carrying their child away and leaving the husband out there in the cold before he even knew what was wrong.
I guess TLC just does not like to show those kind of moments- kind of a downer.
So I stayed in the waiting room, tapped my foot, looked at pamphlets which were about the rights things to do during a pregnancy as I tried to check list in my head if we did all those things. I couldn't even remember. My child was not even born yet and I was a crappy father already... if the baby even came. Don't think that just stop, stop, "STOP!"
Angry nurses and other bystanders looked in my direction, it looked like I had said that out loud. Oops.
Finally, after god knows how long, a doctor came by and said, "Mr Hummel?"
I quickly jogged in his direction and took of my cap; I didn't know the policy of hats in hospitals and asked "Where is my wife? And the baby?" I am not a person who usually panics but I figured this was a good time to do so. "Is everything okay?"
"Your wife was having complications, and we had to do an Emergency delivery." The doctor, whose name I never properly got, was looking seriously in my direction. "Your wife is sedated but stable."
"And the baby?"
The doctor smirked a little, "I was getting there," His smirk disappeared then. "Mr. Hummel, your baby was born sooner than we would have liked, and when this happens this can cause complications."
My whole body froze "Complications?"
Mr. Doctor nodded and said, "Your child has a condition called Apnea and it is fairly common in premature infants."
As if that was supposed to make me feel better.
"And what the hell is that?" I may had said that a bit louder than I would have liked, angry nurses had looked my way again.
To Mr. Doctor's credit he didn't seem fazed at all by my outburst. "Apnea is a condition in which the infant forgets to breathe for a certain period of time." My face must have looked horrific because the doctor raised his hand kindly and added "Don't worry, like I said this is common in immature infants and very treatable." Then he was back into business mode again. "This usually occurs because the infant's brain has not developed enough to remember to take breaths. But we have different ways to kick that into gear and I assure you after some time, if no other complications occur, everything should develop normally."
I rubbed the top of my head like I usually do when I get stressed. "When can we take the baby home?"
"It usually depends on how long the Apnea lasts. We do not release babies from the NICU until they breathe on their own without interruptions for at least 24 hours and sometimes even longer. "Mr. Doctor seemed to be used to stressed fathers and put a hand on my shoulder. "Your child is in good hands, Mr. Hummel. Your son is still being prepared in the NICU, but I assume you would like to see your wife?"
"Yes please," But then a sudden important thought came to me, "Wait- did you say son?"
The doctor smiled. "Yes, you have a baby boy. Congratulations."
For the first time that night my chest lightened a little. "Thank you."
"I'll go take you to see your wife."
o-o-o-o
The next few days passed like a blur. When Linda came to, I told her everything I could and I held her as she got upset. She somehow got it into her head she did something wrong while she was pregnant and this was all her fault and I wouldn't stand for it."
"Baby, you are the most responsible person I know," I whispered to her "these things just happen."
Linda sniffed and grabbed my hand. "We still need a name." Her blue eyes bored into mine.
"Didn't you say you liked Kurt?"
Linda then smiled as if that was the best name she ever heard. "I love Kurt."
I smiled and I hoped it even came close to match the beauty that was being portraying on her face.
"Then Kurt it is."
I kissed her and it occurred to me it was not just the name she had said she loved.
o-o-o-o-o
When Kurt was ready we finally got to meet him, and I don't think I could possibly describe how I felt. On one hand, he was so small and looked so vulnerable in his little unit. Linda had rightfully pointed out that there were babies around him who were even smaller that were hooked to so many machines that they couldn't find the poor child, so that out Burt a bit into perspective.
It was when Kurt opened his eyes fully that I got filled with feelings I didn't know I had. His eyes were Linda's, they were hers. They were big, they were blue and if Kurt was big enough to smile I am sure he would be smiling with his eyes like Linda does.
Suddenly I was a father. I knew that fact before, but it was only then that I truly felt it. This was my son. This was the boy I knew I would spend my life protecting until my last breath. Maybe I was right before when I thought I would not be a good father, but there wasn't a damn way I was not going to try my hardest.
When Kurt was well enough I was able to hold him and those fatherly feelings came back. I was filled with dreams of me and Kurt watching games together and playing together like a team. Maybe there was a tear in my eye or maybe there wasn't, but it looked like Kurt was trying to raise his little hand so I took it and wrapped his little fingers around one of mine. He was far too young, but I like to think that he smiled then.
At that moment there was nothing I loved more and that has not changed.
Hope you liked the first chapter! This will be a continuing series of moments in Burt's and Kurt's life so stayed tuned. Reviews make me feel happy and giddy inside!
