X File 999: A Visit To The Haunted Mansion

(The sceptic, and the true believer visit the mansion. Bit sentimental.. the Haunted Mansion, and the X Files are owned by Disney )

Scully tred lightly through the Seance Room. Mulder had wandered off like a child in a candy shop in search of the Hatbox Ghost; and for the last several hours, she had had to contend with all manner of star- struck revenants asking for intimate details about her work.

Hands on hips, she paused,and sighed quietly, considering her next move.

"Attend to me foolish mortal!"

She spun around to see Madam Leota grinning at her rapturously. "Big Fan! Big Fan!" the fortune teller piped gleefully before recovering herself . "There is a spirit here, who wishes to communicate with you. It is Constance Hatchaway."

"The Black Widow Bride?" asked Scully.

"She wishes to go with you when you leave," said Leota. "She wishes to do what you do."

"What I do ?" Scully asked.

"She wants to know if you cut the people you deal with into very little pieces..."

Scully was pinching the bridge of her nose. "Well, that's not really ..."

"Because she has only a hatchet, you see.. and it might take her a bit longer," said Leota.

"Mulder!" Scully shouted.

An invisible arm wrapped itself gently around her waist, and in an instant, she found herself floating down the hallway . The Ghost Host appeared, smiling, at her side. "Beauregard Air.. it's the only way to fly. Top floor..Habidashery ."

Mulder fairly skipped into the attic, and stopped in the middle of the floor.

"Anyone home?" he called. Just then, a ray of sunlight broke through the clouds, bathing him in a golden glow.

Constance took one look, and dropped her hatchet.

"You're Constance Hatchaway," Mulder said, with an impish grin . "You're awesome!"

And the fearsom Black Widow Bride blushed bright blue, and hiccuped.

"Well, look who's finally come to visit," said a voice from the other side of the attic.

Fox looked stricken , as he walked reverantly to where the voice had come from . A chair appeared for him. "Sit down, Fox..and do close your mouth, you're catching flies."

The Hatbox Ghost was busily working on one of his hats, he paused, and looked over at Mulder, who was looking shell- shocked. "Are you alright, Fox, ?" the old ghoul asked.

"It's been a long time," Fox finally whispered . He looked at a scribbled crayon drawing of Hattie that had been carefully hung on the wall. "You kept my picture ."

"Well, of course," said Hattie, "you were the first to ever have the temerity to say 'I love you'. My how time does fly..you've turned into quite the young man."

Fox was overcome, and had fallen silent. Hattie cocked his head in bemusement. "Well, what is it?" he growled with fake irritaion.

"You got me started, you know," said Fox quietly. "Got me thinking that there might be something more than reality..something magic."

Hattie had stopped working, and was smoothing the brim of the hat. Both men fell silent.

"That's a beautiful hat," Fox finally offered.

"It ought to be, it's for you," said Hattie, handing it to him.

"A fedora?" asked Fox, accepting it gently.

"You know your hats. Try it on," said the old ghoul.

Fox read the label, "Hatties Haunted Hat Shop."

"They will persist in calling me that," growled Hattie.

"I want to believe," Fox read further, "You know."

"Just because I'm dead, that doesn't mean I'm 'out of the loop' as you young people say. Well, try it on," Hattie waved.

"Fits perfectly," beamed Fox.

"Of course," said Hattie.

"Now I look as good as you," Fox smiled.

"Never," said Hattie, smoothing the brim of his top hat.

And for a moment, Fox was ten again, seeing Hattie for the very first time.

A floorboard creaked in back of them, and broke the spell.

"Took you long enough," Fox smiled, as he turned to Scully.

"My apologies," said the Ghost Host, "I wanted to take Miss Scully by the scenic route."

"Hattie.." Fox said, turning back to an empty chair .

Hattie had wasted no time. He was patting Scullys hand, which he held gently in his. "If I was still mortal, my dear.." Scully smiled shyly, and blushed. Well, Hattie was magic after all.

"Ok, you two.." grinned Fox.

"Oh, yes.." Scully started. "Fox, we've been here for hours, and I'm exhausted."

A crowd of ghosts assembled in the main hall to see them off.

"Now, you mustn't be strangers," said the Ghost Host to Scully . Scully extended her hand, which he lifted, and kissed.

Fox reached over with one, finger, and closed her open mouth. "You're catching flies. I'll bring the car around." He turned, and gave a quick wink to Constance.

Clatter..hic.

Scully walked quiety to the gate, and leaned against it waiting.

"Ahem..Oh, I was trying not to startle you," said Hattie, at her flinch. He looked at her sadly. "You see, but you still don't believe."

"I'm a scientist," she smiled, " I'm not supposed to believe in fairy stories."

"Do I look like Tinkerbell to you?" he mock- growled . "There, I got you to smile..there's the magic."

When Scully turned back to him, he was gone.

She got into the car, and settled herself. "Why are you grinning at me, Fox?" she said, exasperated.

"NOW do you believe in ghosts?" he grinned.

"I believe in science," she smiled looking back at the mansion. "And magic," she said quietly to herself.

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