Van: This is just a fun fic that I decided that I would make since I'm bored and waiting on people to comment on my other fics. Don't ask why the pairings. Don't flame either, because it's only for fun and if you don't likey, no reading, okies?

Deidara: You never even watched Shippuden! Why are you even making a fic with me in it, un?

Van: Hmph, Just cause!

Deidara: Why Iruka? I never even met him, un!

Van: Because, it's interesting! (claps in excitement)

Iruka: I have a bad feeling...

Kakashi: Is it really going to end up as D/I? I'm really curious.

Van: Well it really depends on the readers. And about age... XD Well, let's just say Deidara goes for older guys!

Deidara: I do WHAT, un?!

Disclaim: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!

Ch. 1 Art is a bang, yah?

Ohayo, minna-san! I am Umino Iruka, of Konohagure, and I'm a chuunin of great years. I specialize in teaching the future generation in order to prepare them to become full-fledged ninjas! And I don't mean people that dress in black and go "WHO-WAH!" and "HI-YAH!" and wave their arms like idiots. Anyway, I must be pretty lame, since I'm still a Chuunin after several years of experience and I should have become Jounin, but I simply choose not to take it. Little did I know that my troubles were REALLY beginning first off with a certain Jounin named Hatake Kakashi... Really should have avoided him.

He has this idea in his head that since I'm not really going out with any girl, I'm actually a gay! And what other guy could I ever want than him?! So he sent me flowers and poetry and even gave me a declaration of love. To which I had to avoid by going straight to the classroom to give lessons.

Alright so today was a pretty good day so far. I only recieved an Icha Icha Paradise book, which I kept in the deeeeeep corner of dooomm... I visited my parents' graves and gave my respect, wishing that they could help me.

"Oy, Iruka!"

Speak of the devil.

"Where have you been all my life? 3" Kakashi ran up to me and proceed to try to hug me, of which I dodge.

"Knock it off, we're in a cemetary!" I scold.

"Oh? So later then?" Kakashi said seriously.

"Huh?"

"You know... Us, alone, your place, my place." He shrug, but had a really scary glint in his visible eye.

"Oh no, Kakashi, I have to, uh, get going! Because you see, with the offering, I forgot it and- SEE YA!" I quickly ran away from the scary copy-nin. Oh my god, I could swear I hear his voice laughing from far away!


When I finally got the offering, the incense, and the match, everything was so peaceful, I didn't even realize God was going to drop a bomb on me. Literally.

From up above, a blond falls right on top of me. EVERYTHING SPILLS! The incense, the offering! How long did it took me to create that offering! The endless hours of hard work, gone in one blow! Just because of Naruto! Oh wait a minute... That's not Naruto.

"Uuuhh... I see stars, un."

Un? What is "un"?


Van: And cut! That's it so far! Ok, kidding.
I should have obeyed my first instinct and just let him there.

'He's going to cause you trouble! Blondes don't fall out of the sky every day you know!' My inner self scream.

But I lift him and carried him to my apartment.

'You're going to regret it!'

So now I have an unconcious boy that fell from the sky. Joy. In addition, he's in my bed, and further more, it's likely that he's an enemy. Housing him would make me an associate in the crime he may or may not have commited. Come to think of it, isn't it more logical to get him to the hospital, or report his presence? I rouse from my thoughts as he begin to awaken.

"U-uh, where am I, un?"

I try my best to smile. "Hey. You okay there?"

"I'm okay, yeah." He look around confused. "Where am I, hm?"

Oh yeah! "You're in my apartment room. You kind of... Fell. I found you and brought you here. Don't worry, I didn't do anything." I wave my arms in absolute desperation.

He grins at me. And laugh.

And laugh.

And laugh.

I glare at the boy. Didn't they teach him manners?! "Well, if you have that much energy, you must be okay, so up you go."

The boy seem a bit shocked. Haha, back to ya. "Hey, I'm still unwell, un." He pouts.

I sigh and decide to start over. "So. What's your name?"

He blinks. Twice. "My name, un?" He asks nevously.

"Yes." I grumble agitatedly. Hey, you try handling a hyperactive with a guy chasing after you and boys falling from the sky! You'll see what I mean! Unless your a female, but that's another thing.

"Oh, my name, yeah!" He says happily. He waved his hand at me to come closer.

I sigh and lean in my ear.

"It's BUBBA! (un) "

My ears are ringing! I swear they are!

He snickers at me.

Keep calm, he's an injured boy, keep calm... I keep telling myself in my mind. "So, your name's actually Bubba?" I ask trying to be friendly.

"No. It's BUBBA-un." He says grinning.

"Why do I get the feeling you're messing with my head?" I mutter. Unfortunately he catches it.

"Because I am, un."

I groan. Seriously, what is "un"?