This story abruptly starts with Lincoln trying to survive the daily chaos of the Loud House. The duodecuple-voiced entity speaks distorted confabulations at him, sounding like eldritch black speech, we can hear only select parts of the being conversing over themselves. 12 bodies, 1 collective consciousness to get Lincoln to appease them…


"Poo-oops."

"Need to…Grecian…for your…cultural…"

"Lincoln! Choreograph…routine!"

"Will…help me…my pets?"

"I need…rhymes…orange, it's for…about…"

"You'll…training…today…need to kill…you…"

"How about this? What…call…Calgarian?"

"Dude, help me! British…"

"O-M-Gosh, Linky! I…help…new dress…mall."

"Promised…accompany me…see Bobby…Casagrande bodega..., don't you…see Ronnie Anne?"

"I have great news, Lincoln! A…story we co-wrote…make another one, …shadow you…new ideas…"

"Lincoln! Stop…lasagna…sister's plans…bribe Mr. Grouse! He…more than…"

Lincoln somehow managed to fulfill all of the requests today. Though it was extremely difficult to complete Luna and Lori's requests. He had to listen to the entire Beatles discography with Luna! Lori's took the longest to complete, as they had to drive outside of Michigan to visit Bobby and Ronnie Anne! Both of them had fun, although Lori spent the majority of the time trying a series of romantic escapades to further her relationship with Bobby, even though they're already a couple; While Lincoln just hung out with Ronnie Anne. After dealing with all the requests, a tired Lincoln retreats to his room and falls asleep.


"You better enjoy all of the attention you're getting because soon…they'll forget about you."


Author's Note: Here is what everyone is trying to say to Lincoln unscrambled.

Lily: "Poo-Poo."
Lisa: "I need to tutor you for your Grecian Language class for your 5th grade cultural extra credit."
Lola: "Lincoln! Help choreograph my new routine!"
Lana: "Will you help me take care of my pets?"
Lucy: "I need something that rhymes with orange, it's for a poem about you."
Lynn: "You'll be my training dummy for today. I need to kill our rival team and you're going to help me."
Luan: "How about this? What do you call a negatively charged Calgarian? A Proton!"
Luna: "Dude, help me! British invasion of music is happening today, and we were supposed to listen to them together!"
Leni: "O-M-Gosh, Linky! I need your help to pick a new dress for me at the mall."
Lori: "Promised to accompany me to see Bobby at the Casagrande bodega today, don't you want to see Ronnie Anne?"
Rita: "I have great news, Lincoln! A publisher saw the story we co-wrote and wants me to make another one, so I'm going to shadow you to get some new ideas."
Lynn Sr: "Lincoln! Stop using my lasagna for you and your sister's plans to bribe Mr. Grouse! He eats more lasagna than Garfield!"

Luan's joke is a subtle nod to everyone's favorite luckless, but skilled sane man, Proton Jon! Hilarious, considering Luan would learn her bad pun making from the king of bad puns himself, Chuggaaconroy! As if Jon dealing with Emile isn't bad enough, he has to deal with a female version of his annoying friend. I think Jon would call her Femile. Sadly, both Emile and Luan WOULD love that. Poor guy just can't catch a break...

Also it isn't feasible to listen to the entire Beatles discography in 1 day, they just made too many songs! At minimum, to listen to all 227 released Beatles tracks, it would take 11 hours and 35 minutes! And that's if all the songs were just 3 minutes! There's obviously songs that they've written that are longer than that!