Percceptions
"Please Sam, considering where you got them from, using these powers even for good can't be…well good…you know?" Dean was pacing again…it seemed that talking to Sam about his curse as Dean saw it or his gift as Sam was coming to see it, caused him to want to destroy carpeting. Lots of carpeting.
"Dean, it's not where they come from, it's how I use them. Please you have to see that. I mean take for example."…Dean stopped pacing and rolled his eyes, knowing that a Sam moment was on the way. Sam glared at him…"Sorry. Continue."…Sam sighed " take for example Victor Hendrickson."
"What the hell has he got to do with anything?" Dean crossed his arms defensively, suddenly knowing where his brother was taking this argument.
"He thought you were a monster, Dean. He thought you were some, what was his exact words…"….Sam wracked his brain… "oh yeah, a Satan-worshiping nutbag killer, if I remember correctly. Someone that murdered people and mutilated their corpses. You aren't but he isn't far wrong though is he, that line that we walk between being us and ending up a Gordon, it's pretty fine. I mean Dean how many people have we killed getting the demon out of them huh?"
"Low blow little brother, these people would have ended up dead anyway…we just put them out of their misery. You know what these demons do to people they possess." Dean turned away from his brother but Sam spun him back to face him.
"But I know that that isn't right anymore Dean 'cos I saved every single one that I exorcised using this evil power and they all recovered…every. single. last. one. of. them." Sam drove his point home and then had to step back as his brother got right up in his face.
"Yeah? But I bet their dreams are sweet." Dean pulled away from him, the look in Dean's eye and something in his brother's voice stopping Sam's attack on him, leaving him watching as Dean threw himself down on the bed and tried to re-group his thoughts.
Finally Dean spoke. "So you think this power is neutral then…that depending on what you decided to use it for alters it rather than you….that you won't at some point give into it and let it out to bite you on the ass like that chick…what was her name…Ava did?"
"It won't happen." Sam sat down beside his brother.
"You sounds pretty sure there little brother. How can you be that sure?" Dean turned his head to look at him.
"'Cos I have something that all the others didn't have." Sam smiled at him.
"Yeah what?"
"You Dean. I've got my big brother to watch out for me."…. Sam looked down at his hands..."my brother that promised me that he wouldn't let that happen."
Dean sat for a moment and then sighed. "Me and my big mouth eh?"
Sam smiled. "Look, why don't we just take each day as it comes…instead of never, how about only if necessary?"
Dean sighed again. "I'm not going to win on this one am I?" He tried hard not to think about the double edge to that statement.
"Nope."
Dean voiced his fear. "What about the angels?"
"They don't scare me."
"Really…'cos you can just feel the love from the big guy Uriel." Dean paused. "Why couldn't God have sent me girl angels you know…some real heavenly bodies." He lost his train of thought for a moment. "Now that I coulda worked with."
Sam laughed at his brother's dreamy smile. "God's not stupid you know."
"Can't have all his bolts tightened…he chose me for…well whatever he did choose me for."
"Yeah, I see what you mean…maybe he felt sorry for the rest of them down there."
"Huh?"
"Well eternal damnation must be bad enough…but spending it with Dean Winchester? I mean its hell even sharing a car with you for eight hours."
Dean laughed as his brother threw his own words back at him.
"Funny…really…well maybe be he didn't save me to spare all the others down there from my wonderful presence."
"Really…why then?"
Dean stood, picked up his car keys and opened the room door. "Maybe he did it 'cos he just doesn't like you."
Dean snorted as he walked through the door…Sam smiled then let it fade from his lips.
"Maybe he did at that."
