"No t-shirts, for heavens sake anyone can see your six pack."
"Try this sweater on. Lower your shoulders a little, don't stand up so straight."
"Now your voice. Try it lower. No, that's too low. Perfect."
"Now about your eyes… for the longest time I've been getting compliments on how unearthly of a blue they are. Wait, dear, can I have those?"
"Yes, that'll do. It cuts the color just a little. I think you're ready. Now remember, read up on those acting books and try not to bluster so much. We want to make sure that you get a good education and having your troubles come down on your head even for a year will be difficult."
"Right. Got it."
*
*
When Ranma Met Minako
Written by Shaun Garin
*
*
The clamour of the reporters was astounding as Minako pushed her way through them. It was one thing to bask in them, but it was another to be consistently accosted by them everywhere they went.
"Miss Aino! Your record sold twenty thousand volumes on the first day. How do you feel about that?"
"Miss Aino! Your friend Usagi Tsukino revealed herself to be Sailor Moon, is it true that you are one of the Senshi?"
"Miss Aino!"
"Miss Aino!"
With a final slam of the doors, Minako groaned. "Honestly Usagi, you just made life so much more difficult!"
"Are they gone?" asked Artemis, sticking his head out of the bag. Looking around, he sighed. "The rest of the senshi have yet to reveal themselves, huh?"
"I know. I have no idea how Usagi-chan's handling it," said Minako. "In fact I-oop!"
"Look out!"
The collision was inevitable. A young man coming from the library collided with Minako, sending the pair tumbling to the ground, spilling books and papers everywhere. "I-I'm sorry," stammered the young man as he scrambled to pick things up.
"N-no it's my fault, I wasn't paying attention," replied Minako as she set to picking up things, Artemis hanging his head. "Sorry."
The young man grinned, just a little and it was a nervous grin. "Sorry about that still. I'm uh, Ranma."
"Minako," replied Minako as she helped him gather everything up. He was okay, a little wimpy was her first impression, with the way he wore that sweater and suit jacket. He wore those big round glasses and his hair was tamed despite being in a ponytail. Classic nerd.
Likewise, Ranma's first assumption of her was interesting. Well made up, pretty, a little flighty but that's the only things he saw on the news. She looked a little tough, sort of rough around the edges but had a warm fuzzy feeling to her.
"Is that everything?" asked Minako as she heaped the books onto Ranma, having gathered the assorted papers and sandwiching them between the books.
"Yeah, that's everything," said Ranma, "Thank you for your help, Minako-san."
"Hey no problem; it's a welcome distraction from the reporters." Patting him, she added, "Later!" and headed away.
Ranma watched her go, and then let out a breath. "Dear momma, it worked."
*
*
"Psst, Mina."
Minako looked down at her bag as Artemis poked his head out. "Check it out, it's that Ranma guy over in the corner."
Minako looked up. "Where?"
"There! The hunched over guy."
Minako followed Artemis' directions and sure enough, there was Ranma, working on a paper while listening to the lecture. "Huh, I never saw him there before…"
"You're kidding right?" said Artemis. "He's been there since the beginning of your school year!"
"… no way," defended Minako. "I know everyone in this class and there's no way I could have missed him."
"Well you've got me. The guy's invisible. It's like he's going out of his way to do so. As if…. Mmm naw."
Minako rolled her eyes. "If you don't mind Artemis, I need to focus on the lecture."
"Right, right." Artemis however wasn't so easily convinced.
*
*
Ranma took a sip of coffee as he returned to his school work. While he didn't need it per say, it was good for temporary bursts of energy that didn't result in him engaging in a good fight. To be honest, he had been surprised; three months into college and he hadn't been attacked or ambushed or anything! Those acting classes really helped him out, as long as he didn't accidentally get splashed.
It had been a long debate that Ranma would have to find a secondary profession when he started teaching in the dojo; martial arts weren't as commonly taken and the amount of actual students had been low since then. As such, it was decided that Ranma would have to go to Azubu-Juuban's college in order to take something he liked.
That in a twist of irony happened to be journalism. While Akane took acting classes in another college, Ranma loved being in the thick of things, getting interviews. Cultivated with his "no need to stand out" personality that he had developed for just such an occasion, the famous Ranma Saotome had all but vanished from the district, replaced by the nervous, soft spoken Ranma. Not even his own classmates noticed he was in the room which was good for him. Of course it made things just a touch difficult to get group projects done, but he had a few friends, Umino and Naru. Fortunately Umino despite being a male Nabiki despite not charging for his information had yet to connect Ranma Saotome to Ranma.
"Saotome-kun," said the teacher and Ranma looked up. "Your partner for this project is Aino-kun. Please meet with her after class."
Ranma looked over at Minako who waved cheerily. Since when was she in this class?
*
*
"So we're partners," said Minako as they took their coffees from the barista. "I guess we should get to know each other."
"Sounds good," said Ranma, balancing his usual stack of books as he set them down on a nearby table and Minako set down her bag.
The bag oofed but otherwise didn't peep.
Ranma looked at the bag and asked, "Do you have something in there?"
"Huh? Oh, just my pet cat." Said Minako, and was completely floored when Ranma fell out of his chair twitching. "Huh? Something I said?"
Easing himself to a chair, Ranma stammered out, "I… I'm afraid of them. Childhood trauma."
"Ah." Minako shook her bag. "Hear that Artemis? Don't come out of there."
The bag seemed to grumble and Ranma blinked. That was some trained cat if it would groan on command.
"So, felines aside, what else is interesting?" asked Minako curiously.
"Well… I grew up in Nerima, went on a trip when I was little. For the longest time I had to deal with an engagement being pushed on Akane and I, but we decided that we needed space to go about our schooling first. We still like each other but we haven't really progressed in that way." Said Ranma. "I commute here every morning from my parents house on the edge of Nerima."
"So you're still engaged?" inquired Minako, obviously surprised. A nerdy guy like this managing to score a girl? Well then again there was Umino and Naru, and they were the most unlikely couple in the world.
"Yeah, of our own free will this time. But at the least, we call each other all the time. How about you Minako-san?"
"Oh well, I grew up here, spent a year in England, and I've got several good friends who are attending here as well," said Minako. "Mako-chan and Ami-chan are studying like crazy, Rei-chan as well who transferred here partway through the school year. It's Usagi-chan who has it tough. She completely swapped majors and is fast-tracked into the Military."
Ranma blinked rapidly. "Wait, you're friends with Usagi Tsukino? Sailor Moon?"
Minako grinned ruefully, rubbed her head and said, "Yeah. It was quite a shock when she revealed herself. I didn't think the girl had it in her to save all our asses."
"Huh, no kidding, but looks can be deceiving," said Ranma, hiding a smirk under his coffee cup.
"So, we should figure out a topic. So how does a rising Idol Singer wind up taking Journalism anyhow?"
"Blame that on my dad. He said that I need a background in media when my "shine" either fades or transcends from idol to international." Said Minako. "Not like I don't have faith in becoming a international sensation!"
Ranma could have sworn the bag muttered "Good going Mina, way to be modest."
*
*
After several hours of working out their project, Ranma and Minako as one, sat back and stretched, the sound of popping bones echoing in the nearly deserted study hall. "Wow, that was the longest study stretch ever," groaned Minako. "How do you do this all the time Ranma?"
"Lots of practice," replied Ranma with a rueful grin. "I was the world's worst student in high school. I had time to refine my technique since then." His mother was quite the motivator.
"No kidding." Looking at her watch, she whistled. "We've been at this for three hours now. But we got the first draft done and the second."
"I'll run it through a spellcheck, and then we'll type up the third," said Ranma. He swished his cup, finding the contents cold. "Blah, cold coffee."
Minako giggled at his expression. "You know Ranma, you're not half bad. When I first ran into you, you're such a wallflower. Kind of like Ami." A thought came to her and added, "You never took a mock exam before under the name Mercurius have you?"
Ranma blinked and thought back. "No, the one I used was Panda-smasher. Don't ask, it's a inside joke."
"I won't. Everyone's entitled to inside jokes." Minako thought it over and said, "Hey Ranma, you wanna come with me and get something to eat? Crown Fruit Parlour is still open."
"Really?" inquired Ranma. "Well sure! I'll just get these books put away in my locker and I'll be right with you."
As Ranma picked up his stuff and headed upstairs, Artemis poked his head out. "You're taking him to Crown? Mina, he doesn't seem like your type."
"He isn't," replied Minako. "But he's a nice guy and I'd like to make friends sometimes. I don't really go for nervous and shy types like him anyhow."
"If you say so. Are the rest of the girls meeting you there?"
"Mmmm, I'd have to ask."
Soon enough, Ranma returned, free of books. "All right, I'm ready to go."
*
*
"Who's the guy Mina?" asked Makoto as the pair sat down in what they unofficially termed the "Senshi Corner", a booth big enough to house several people at a time.
"Guys, this is Ranma, my partner for our Journalism project." Said Minako and the others waved. "Ranma, this is Ami-chan, Mako-chan, Rei-chan and Usagi-chan."
"Nice to meet you all," said Ranma, a hint of nervousness in his voice. "Minako-san's said a lot of nice things about you all."
"Oh? Sounds like Minako has a boyfriend," teased Rei. Minako sputtered her drink, as did Ranma who went further and knocked the salt over. "Kidding, kidding!"
"I'm, um, engaged," said Ranma with a shy expression.
"You're kidding!" exclaimed Makoto in surprise. "A guy like you? Who's the lucky girl?"
"Akane Tendo…"
Rei's eyes widened. "Akane Tendo? THE Akane Tendo? She's one of the rising stars of acting! Movie producers and talent agencies have been scouting her out for months now! Sister Angela from my old school has been raving about how good she is!"
"I um…" Ranma found it hard not to counter how good she was with one of his exploits, and the others took it as a bout of nervousness. Fortunately Ami came to his rescue with a statement of, "Congratuations, Ranma-san."
"T-thank you," stammered Ranma.
"So how did a lucky guy like you snag one of the newest actresses on the block?" inquired Usagi curiously. "Must have been interesting."
"Ah heh, well, I sort of walked off the street one day, into her family dojo and her dad said "These are my daughters, Kasumi 19, Nabiki 17, Akane 16. Pick one and she'll be your fiancée."
Silence. And then Makoto hung her head. "If only it was that easy in real life…"
*
*
"See you tomorrow, Ranma?" said Minako as she walked him to the train station.
"Yeah. And um, thanks. For being a friend and all. I don't have many in school and, well…" said Ranma, fidgeting.
Minako chuckled. "Well if anything you were able to get my studies done in time. And you made a few more friends too."
"That's true," laughed Ranma, and it was the first genuine sound he had produced in a while. "Well I suppose…"
"Give me your energy!"
The pair blinked as they turned towards a young man who was being strangled by a youma of all things.
Minako swore. "I thought…! Oh damnit. Ranma, let's get to cover and…!" She blinked at the empty space that used to be Ranma and sighed. "Easier for me!"
Ducking into an alcove, she threw up her hand. "Venus Crystal Power, Make Up!" In a blast of light, she had shifted from Minako to Sailor Venus and the girl was already out into the street. "Hey Youma!"
The youma looked over and paled. "Oh fudgebuckets," groaned the youma.
"Fudgebuckets?" inquired Venus, a moment before the youma who was made out of pencils hurled a volley of them at her which she swiftly dodged. "Didn't you know the Dark Kingdom's out of service?"
The youma glared as she topped off on the young man's power, dropping him to the ground. "You didn't get all of us sailor brat! Pencil Piercer!"
Venus found that pencils when thrown could really cause a girl to dodge. "Nuts… I can't get a moment to attack!"
The youma was sweating buckets. She knew it was only a matter of time till the rest of the senshi showed up. Hell, Venus was more than a match for her. Her power was out of date, she was weak, a straggling left over from what remained of the Dark Kingdom. "Giant Pencil of Doom!"
Venus yelped as the giant pencil soared down at her and braced for impact when suddenly a tall form stopped it cold. "Hey, youma-thing. Ya shouldn't be tryin' ta kill women you know."
"Who are you?" demanded the youma as fear-filled eyes met angry blue eyes.
The young man that stood there was dressed in Chinese clothing, wore bracers and his hair was in a pigtail. He smirked and with one hand, crushed the pencil. "Me? The name's Ranma Saotome, and I'm here to kick your ass."
'Ranma?' thought Venus as she looked up at her savour. No, this couldn't be the same Ranma. For one thing, Ranma was far different: he slouched; he was nervous; he wasn't this rugged handsome man who she could see the muscles coiling just by clenching his fingers. No, this was a living legend, the warrior of Nerima, the one who brought chaos everywhere he strode. He was a Godslayer, a powerful martial artist.
He was PERFECT.
"Well then Ranma Saotome, PREPARE TO DIE!"
"You have no idea how I missed that," laughed Ranma as the pencils blasted towards him as he cupped his hands and brilliant gold light spilled from the cracks in his fingers. "Moko Takabisha!"
The ball of chi rocketed forward, slamming through the attack and impacting on the youma who screamed in pain. "What?! What is this?!"
"Chi," said Ranma. "You youma drain energy which would be normally a bad thing for me to use against y'all. But pure confidence is like poison to you. Y'need fear, am I right, Venus?"
"Uh yeah," said Venus as she got to her feet to watch the youma scream at the douse of poisonous energy she received. "I'd better finish it off."
The youma didn't even bother to scream anything as it was blasted apart from a Love and Beauty Shock, as it was too busy screaming in pain from the acid-like burning sensation. Turning to Ranma, she said, "Thanks."
"Hey no problem. It's a martial artists duty to protect the weak, but ya ain't exactly weak. Just was off balance, right?" replied Ranma with that lady-killer smile of his.
Venus nearly swooned at that smile. And his eyes, and everything! "Y-yeah. You said your name was Ranma Saotome?"
"Yep," said Ranma, jerking a thumb towards himself. "Ranma Saotome, heir to the Saotome Anything Goes Martial Arts."
"Wow… Well I'm Sailor Venus and it's been a real pleasure. Perhaps we could get together some time and…"
"Venus-chan…!" Venus swivelled her head at the running up Sailor Moon. "Where's the youma?"
"Oh don't worry, it was killed by me and…" Venus looked at the young man who wasn't there anymore, but instead was grinning from a rooftop before he bounded away. "Wow…"
"Who was that?" asked Sailor Moon as she powered down.
"That? That was the most eligible bachelor in the world, Ranma Saotome."
"Wait, the nerd?"
"No! Ranma's nothing like this guy. There's got to be two of them." Venus laughed at the thought of the nerdy Ranma being the hunky Ranma Saotome.
*
*
"There you are!" exclaimed Minako as she found Ranma staggering out from behind a dumpster. "What happened?"
"I… I'm sorry Minako, I sort of panicked," stammered Ranma. "When I saw the youma, I thought it was going to come for me next and I ran and…!"
Minako sighed as she patted him on the shoulder. "It's okay Ranma, you didn't know it was a weak thing from the Dark Kingdom. Hell, you could have taken it!"
"I don't know about that," said Ranma. "But in any case, I'm sorry for running off like that."
"Oh it's okay," said Minako. "You're new here, so you're not used to the weirdness."
'If you only knew…' thought Ranma, grinning inside. Mom was right, a little acting, some different clothing… no one could play Connect the Dots.
