A/N: This was written straight after we heard that Lisbon would have a boyfriend but we didn't know a name yet... I changed it now since we know a name now but okay. Just posting this because I haven't been posting much lately and I don't want to lose any more followers by not posting anything. Again, not my best work.

Disclaimer: Nothing is mine.


'Don't forget about me'

He had been too late – or a complete coward. Probably both.

Lisbon had moved on, long before he had been ready for it. She had found another man to love her and it was pretty obvious she liked that guy too. Of course she did, he had everything she ever looked for in a man – good sense of humor, good morals and a nice smile. Jane hated him with his guts.

But, Jane also had to admit defeat. He'd had his moments, lots of them even. She had been right in moving on without him. He'd had his shot, he blew it, and it was only fair that he didn't get another chance. That didn't mean that he was happy about it, though. Because he wasn't. But he wasn't going to destroy her happiness – at the end of the day, all he wanted to see in his life was Lisbon happy. And Jane had to give it to the guy – he could make Lisbon happy.

He downed another mouthful of scorching hot tea. It didn't hurt as much as his broken heart.

~...~

It felt as though he hadn't taken a breath for the past hour. His heart was in his throat and all he wanted to do was run for his life, run to the moon and back just to check whether she was okay.

Damnit! How could that driver not have seen her? She'd taken the team's car, for god's sake, how was it possible for anyone to overlook that monster?!

When he arrived at the room a nurse had pointed him to, he stopped dead in his tracks. Lisbon's... boyfriend had beaten him. Jane had been too late. His heart dropped and he felt tears in his eyes. Why did this even hurt this much? It wouldn't make a difference if he was the second person next to her bed.

Except it would. He knew it would. The second person didn't matter, the second person was the person who didn't bother rushing to come first. The second person lost.

He would have to find peace with always being second.

~...~

It had been days now and she was still in the hospital. She couldn't remember who she was anymore, or who the people around her were. With what had happened to her, it was a small miracle she was still alive.

Since her boyfriend Pike had been the first one beside her bed, Jane didn't get the chance to help her remember who she was. Pike had told her all about their relationship and even though she didn't remember a lot about it anymore, it did influence the way she behaved. She didn't remember Pike being her boyfriend but she still treated him as such. She accepted his hands on her cheeks and his lips on hers, as though she thought that by him doing that, she would remember again.

Jane hadn't gone inside the room once. He didn't see the use in it anyway, he wouldn't matter to her anymore. He had pondered leaving, since she wouldn't remember anything about him and it was best if he left her life once and for all. But a tiny part of his heart just wouldn't allow him, that part of him still hoped she would remember him one day. But then again, if he would never make an appearance, the chance of her ever remembering him would be very small.

The entire team had at least once gone into her room. They had all forced him to go inside and talk to her but he couldn't cope doing so. She didn't remember him and she did remember her boyfriend. He didn't exist in her life anymore, and it was better that way. He had always known she was better off without him.

~...~

Pike looked at Jane for the first time since Lisbon had ended up in the hospital, as he was about to enter her room.

"Why are you still here?" Pike asked. Jane shrugged.

"I honestly don't know."

"Then leave. Go home. Start a new life. You know you can't have one with Teresa."

Jane looked at Pike for a long time, then nodded and turned around. Pike was right. He needed to go. Lisbon was happy now, with the man who made her feel loved and with no trace of Patrick Jane in her memories.

It was the least – and last – thing Jane could do for her.

~...~

He couldn't leave. He was endlessly wandering around the hospital, occasionally looking at the window he knew connected with her room. Sometimes, he could swear he saw someone looking at him, but it always turned out to be Pike.

A hand roughly pushed against him and he startled out of his thoughts.

"You're an idiot," he heard Cho's voice. Jane sighed sadly and lowered his head.

"I know."

He shook his head and walked away. A hand stopped him.

"Jerk. Go to her. Talk to her. Geez, Jane."

"No, Grace. It won't change anything. She doesn't remember me. And anyway, she has someone who'll take care of her now. She'll do fine."

"No she won't. Because he's not you."

Jane still walked away, after successfully claiming his hand back. He heard Van Pelt screaming behind him, and Rigsby trying to control her but failing.

"Just walk into that room! Talk to her! You're the only one she ever really cared about!" When he didn't respond to her or even stopped to listen to her, he heard her running after him. But he never turned around.

~...~

It had been months since he had last seen anyone of the team. He had left them behind, but more importantly, he had left Lisbon behind. For her own good, he had tried to convince himself but he couldn't stop thinking about her. There hadn't been one day that had passed in which he hadn't thought about her. And for that reason alone, he had to see her again. One last time. He had to tell her goodbye, just to close this chapter of his life for good. To be honest, it would be the last chapter of his life, because without her, he was dead. But she was better off with Pike, he told himself again. Pike was a better man.

He had wanted to buy her something but it would only make this moment worse. So he eventually came into the bullpen bearing nothing but his heavy decision. This was the last time he would see her. He better not ruin this.

Fischer jumped up instantly when she saw him entering and instead of cursing at him, she smiled softly at him and left them alone.

He looked at Lisbon. She looked beautiful, more beautiful than his memories would allow. Heavenly.

No. He had to go through with this. This had to be a goodbye.

She frowned at him. Brushed a strand of hair out of her face. That's when he saw – she was engaged. His heart broke into a million small pieces, but on the outside, he remained calm.

"Can I help you?" she asked. So she still didn't remember him. This really wasn't a-

"Yes. You... you can't remember me, and I'm to blame for that. But... we used to know each other. And I've misused your trust... so I'm taking responsibility for that now and I'm leaving forever. But I... couldn't leave without a final hug. Just one hug, just a short one. I know this sounds really weird, considering you're engaged and all..."

She stood and nodded. "Alright," she answered, though he could hear in her voice she was still doubting. If anything, Pike had made her accept much more things than she would before.

He walked over to her and hesitated, too long, for she stepped towards him and wrapped her arms around him. He felt tears burning in his eyes as he buried his face in her hair. She still smelled like she used to, the same cinnamon scent hit his nostrils. He was shaking when he closed her inside his arms, feeling her fragile body with his hands.

"Lisbon, I-" a voice destroyed the perfect moment and she unfortunately jerked away from him. Jane didn't turn around, as he realized that was the last time he would ever hold her in his arms. His body was still tingling from the sensation.

"Oh, hey Jane," he heard Wiley say, his voice laced with mild anger for leaving them for so many months. Although Jane had never expected the man to be this angry since they hadn't been working together for so long.

That's when Jane realized the penny had dropped for Lisbon. He didn't know how or when, but he knew it had when he saw her face went pale and she stared at him, for longer than he would have wanted.

Eventually, she could only whisper her thoughts.

"Jane..."

Jane lowered his head and sighed. This would only make things harder, because he was still determined to leave.

"I remember now... Jane."

"I noticed. And I'm sorry for that."

He still didn't meet her eyes, but soon, he didn't need to anymore, as he felt the burning sensation before he realized she had slapped him in the face.

"You jerk," she breathed, but pulled him close to her by the lapels of his jacket. "You stupid jerk."

Jane was paralyzed with shock but he still somehow managed to wrap his arms around her.

"Where were you? I needed you."

"I... I..."

She pulled away from him and he was still unable to move. When she moved closer again but towards his lips with hers, he all but startled awake with his statue-like stance and closed the distance before realizing what he was doing, what they were doing. Her lips felt amazing under his but they couldn't do this! He reared back with a slight gasp and put some distance between them.

"Lisbon... you're... you're engaged."

He really had to get away from here. He had made things only worse for both of them, especially for her. For a moment, he wondered what her reaction would be if she had learned about his death. Having seen her reaction to remembering him, he still wasn't sure.

He closed his eyes and turned around.

"Just a hug," he whispered.

"Jane-"

"No," he said as he turned back towards her. He saw she was getting desperate now, but he couldn't change anything about that. Once again, he was telling himself that she was better off without him, and she was. She looked better than she had ever looked before and it was all because of her perfect fiancé. "You're happy now. I only hurt you, you're not going to be any happier with me in your life. This is all I can do for you, Teresa, don't you understand? I can't give you much, my whole life has been torn away from me years ago, I genuinely have nothing to give. But I can give you this chance at happiness, because I know Pike can make you happy. Just... give me the satisfaction of leaving you behind a happier woman. You made my life so much better but now it's my turn to make yours better, and the only way of doing that is leaving you."

He saw she was searching for words to say but nothing came out of her mouth as he left the bullpen and her life.

~...~

He watched as wave after wave crashed against the bottom of the cliff, creating foam that covered the water surface. He would soon be drifting there, his body slowly decaying until there was nothing left of him. It was rather typical, as there was nothing left of his soul any longer anyway. His heart had been ripped out of his body the moment Lisbon ignored him completely without realizing it – she had been too busy chatting with her boyfriend. The moment he realized he didn't mean anything to her anymore, while she still meant the world to him.

He felt a tear streaming down his cheeks. This was the moment to end it all, end his misery. He took a step towards the edge of the cliff and got a clearer look of the water underneath it. Just a step away from peace in his mind. He took another step...

...and that's when he heard a voice calling him.

"Jane, don't you dare!"

It wasn't a voice he had wanted to hear in this moment – it was Pike – but he really didn't care.

"It's the only way," Jane answered.

"No, it's not. Step away from the edge and you'll see, there's another way."

He didn't listen but lifted a leg to cross it over the edge, his heart beating frantically in his chest. No. This was the only way.

Suddenly, he felt small arms wrapping around him from behind and he froze.

"Put down your foot, now," her voice ordered him and he obeyed her instantly, putting down his foot and turning around towards her. She pulled him away from the edge of the cliff and he saw she was crying, her eyes filled with unnecessary worry for him. Instead of him being the one shaking since he had almost killed himself, she was shaking.

"God dammit," she breathed and pulled him towards her, kissing him. This time, he didn't push her away from him but instead pulled her closer to him, until she was completely pressed against him. It felt so marvelous that right in that moment, he couldn't think of the reason why he had almost killed himself a few seconds ago.

She was the one to pull away. She put her forehead against his and let out a breath of relief. "I hate you so much."

Her hand reached up to brush his cheek.

"What about Pike?"

She rolled her eyes, causing a tear to fall down from her eyes. "He knew I didn't love him. When he met you, all the pieces fell together and he merely proposed to me because he was sure you wouldn't come back any longer. He knew deep down, I was in love with you instead of him but because he was afraid I wouldn't open up to anybody anymore, he was willing to sacrifice himself for my sake to make me happy." She huffed softly. "The idiot."

Jane couldn't believe his ears. Was everything she was telling him now true?

"You're an idiot too, by the way." She kissed his lips softly. "But I love you. It has always been you. Before the car crash, I started dating Pike for obvious reasons you couldn't see, it even took a while for me to realize them. But then I couldn't remember anything anymore, and I was suddenly left with a huge hole in my heart. Pike filled it only for a bit, but I still didn't feel complete. When he told me that he and I were dating I just assumed that that was the path I had chosen for myself so I didn't stray from it. I think that... if I would've seen you in the hospital, I might have realized. But you never visited. So there was always this nagging feeling remaining that something was missing. Something very big and important."

"I was there," he whispered. "I was sitting on the hallway for days on end."

"Why didn't you come inside my room?"

"For the same reason that we're standing here now. I'm not the right man for you-"

"Shut up. You've always been the right man for me."

She kept looking at him but then grabbed his arm, softly. "I, uh... I think I need to sit down for a moment."

He wrapped his arms around her and carried her to the car he saw standing on the road. Pike was awaiting them, a slight smile on his face. Jane realized the man must know that his time with Lisbon had ended and she was now somebody else's. Then again, hearing her explanation, she had always been Jane's. Something Jane still couldn't fathom.

Pike opened the door and Jane made her sit down on the seat, kneeling down in front of her.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, worried something was wrong with her now.

"Are you for real?" she countered. "You almost killed yourself. I almost lost you. I need a moment to realize you're still here."

She touched his cheeks and smiled softly, looking into his eyes.

"Don't ever leave me again, okay? I swear, I won't survive the next time."

He nodded and leaned close enough so that he could hug her, her legs preventing him from pulling her close to his chest but she helped him by spreading her knees. He gratefully took up the now empty space in between them and cradled her head against his shoulder.

Life was at its finest now.


A/N: Meh. Let me know anyway. And sorry again for any mistakes or things, my mind isn't that clear right now.