What the fuck is going on? One second I was sleeping, the next I'm sitting here staring at an angel. Yeah, that sounds like some corny pick up line, but I mean LITERALLY. AN ANGEL.
"Cas, what the hell are you doing here so late?"
He looked confused. Come on Cas, it's 3 in the morning.
"I do not understand Dean. It is morning. Wouldn't it be early?"
I would punch him but I can't. I couldn't bring myself to do that.
"Cas, to humans, 3 am is late. You can't just show up at 3 am uninvited to someone's house. What if I was doing something else?"
"Something else..? Like, a woman..?"
"Cas that is not what I meant at all."
… This conversation is getting nowhere. Let's try changing the subject.
"Did you need something? Are you okay?"
He smiled an odd smile and just stared at me. Finally after long awkward minutes of that staring, he spoke.
"I just needed company is all."
"… Cas, you woke me up at 3 in the morning because you needed company?"
"Of course. Why wouldn't I? Don't you need company too?"
"Why would I need company? I was sleeping."
"But you were alone. Isn't sleeping with someone much less lonely?"
Please tell me you aren't offering to sleep with me.
"Um… I guess you could say for some people yes. I sleep alone every night and I have no problems with it, Cas. I'm fine."
His face changed to some weird half confused/half sad face. Do I wanna ask, or no?
Ugh… I'm feeling compassionate today.
"What's wrong?"
He walked to my bed and sat down, not asking as usual.
"I think you are lying."
"About what?"
What the hell is he talking about? Lying?
"I think you are lonely."
He looked sad when he spoke. I kind of feel bad. I don't know why he's so worried. I've been fine for months, why would he be so sad?
"Cas, it's only been months since the accident… You can't expect me to be happy or want to find someone else."
"Dean, you deserve to be happy."
Why is he telling me all this now? After not showing up since the accident, I thought he just didn't give a fuck anymore.
"Why did you leave after the accident? Friends don't usually leave friends. Especially when shit like that happens…"
He looked really sad again. Damn it, Dean, learn to control yourself.
"I wanted to give you space. I knew you were depressed, I could sense it. However, if you weren't, I'd be even more concerned. You loved her."
He was right about that… But she's gone now. It's been months since that god damn thing killed her, and I can't get over it. God damn it.
"I still am sometimes, Cas. A lot of the time. I do miss her. And I know I sound like a bitch, but sometimes I feel like one."
He stood up and walked over to right in front of me. After what seemed like decades, he slowly put his arms around me.
"Uh… what are you doing?"
"I believe this is called a hug. It is used to comfort or to show love."
"I know what a hug is used for…"
I guess this is his way of saying he's sorry for leaving after the accident. Any other person or creature and it would've been dead by now, but I'll give Cas a break. This time.
"Thanks Cas."
He stood straight up and walked to the other side of the bed. I was confused then, but when he started taking off his clothes… What the fuck?
"What the hell are you doing?!"
"I told you, it is better to sleep with someone than alone. I shall accompany you"
God damn it, Cas.
"Cas, I sleep naked. You can't sleep with me."
"Oh do not worry Dean, I do too."
GOD DAMN IT, CAS.
