Author notes: Hey guys, fortifiedfiction here, this is my first published fanfic, so be sure to leave PLENTY of reviews, if you catch an error, or have suggestions just write me a review. Remember, the more you review the better my stories get. Oh, and I plan for this to be a 3 part story, this is only part 1. If I feel like I get enough positive feedback I might post the second. Oh well, remember this is my first and just enjoy. (Warning, there is a lot of POV switching :P). Yeah ik the name is stupid, my friend came up with it... let's just say i lost a bet.
Prologue/Overview:
Ever since the games had ended, and everyone had been returned the RG, Neku's life had been changed, not dramatically, but it was a change nonetheless. He still wasn't a social butterfly, but he wasn't an introverted social outcast anymore, and there were only 3 people he could thank for that, his best, and only friends in this world. Beat, Shiki and Rhyme were all waiting for him by the time he had arrived at Hachiko.
"Heh, look who's late to the party again." Beat was smirking, by the look on his face, Neku could tell that they hadn't been here all that long.
"Beat stop it, you know that we just got here from 104 not more than a minute ago." Rhyme was the brains in their pair, literally all the brains, I mean, Beat still thinks that Brawns meant that he was in third place in the group.
Chapter 1: Neku
I couldn't see there was the one most important to me. Shiki Misaki, my first partner. Although I often considered Shiki a stalker, I could not deny the fact that I was somewhat drawn to the girl, in the end at least. While in the UG she had pretended to be her friend Eri, a cute, bubbly, outgoing type person. I hated it, why should I have to believe something just because someone else did, it wasn't till the end when I saw Shiki for who she really was. Where is she? Maybe she forgot maybe she didn't want to see me. Maybe… my thoughts were interrupted by a tap on his shoulder, I turned to say "Oh, excuse me." When suddenly I heard a very familiar voice… "Go Mr. Mew!" and at that moment a fluffy pig type animal was shoved in my face, and I heard laughter all around me. When the piggy was finally removed from my face I saw a brown haired girl with glasses, wearing just a simple white shirt and a green jacket covering it,
"Shiki!" I shouted with more excitement than per usual.
"Hee hee, I didn't think you'd be so happy to see me." Shiki giggled and greeted everyone else.
"Yo Phones, what's wrong? You too hot or something? Why's yo face all red?" Beat look confused, as if he had never seen someone blush before, or perhaps… he just didn't understand why I was blushing. I pulled his jacket up a little higher, just high enough to cover his rosy cheeks.
I cleared my throat, "So are we going to get Ramen or not?"
We sat down at their favorite ramen joint Ramen Don, and as usual, the line was long. That didn't matter to us, we walked right in and greeted the owner, Ken Doi.
"ahhh if it isn't the people who helped me become so popular in the first place." He smiled and waved us in.
"Hey pops, we're starved, can we save the chit chat till after we get our grub?"
Sigh, just like Beat, his brain in his stomach, thank god he had Rhyme with him, and speaking of which, at that moment, Rhyme jumped up and snatched Beats ear,
"Daisukenojo Bito! Where are your manners, Neku treats us to ramen, and Mr. Ken give us seats, and you can't show either of them any appreciation?" She had an angry scolding look on her face, like a mother punishing a child. I saw Beat wince, not from the pinch, Rhyme wasn't all that strong, but from hearing his full name. We were all laughing at Beat when suddenly I froze.
"Wait! Who said I was treating for ramen?!" I was standing there with my mouth agape as my friends stood there with mischievous smiles.
"Well Neku, we've been back in the RG for almost a month now, and you still don't seem to have changed a bit! We all thought it would be nice of you to show some care for us!"
"Yeah!" Beat and Rhyme declared in unison. I stood there dumbfounded and hurt. I felt conned.
"Hey! I've changed a lot since the UG! I mean… I'm talking to people now, like you guys… and… and…" I stuttered, they were right, I hadn't changed all that much. Sure I talked to these guys, but it was almost like I had to. I mean, without them I probably would be dead by now, I mean dead again.
"awwww come on Neku, so you're not going to pay for our meal?" Shiki was hugging my arm kneeling on the ground like a puppy or something. She was looking up at me trying her best to hide her smile. When she hugged me though, I got some weird sensation, what was this? A little greater than happiness
"Neku?"
But it wasn't lust either, I don't know, was this emotion…. Was it… L
"Hey Phones! FOOD!" Beat shouted as loud as he could into my ear, and I fell on the floor. After the fit of laughing we all sat down, I sat down with a heavy heart, having lost the fight. After the meal (which was delicious) we all left with full stomachs, and I, with an empty wallet.
"Well Neku, Shiki, I think Beat and I ought to get home, our parents haven't let us out of their sights much since we, well, died."
After some quick goodbyes it was just me and Shiki. Suddenly Shiki turned to me,
"Hey Neku, come with me." Before I even had a chance to respond, Shiki was pulling me towards 104, what have I gotten myself into.
It seemed like this was going to take forever, Shiki had dragged me into a shopping spree with her at 104 again at my expense.
"Hey, a woman shouldn't have to pay while a gentleman is around." She had said with her head held high. I sat there for what seemed like hours. Finally we walked out of the store empty handed, not because of Shiki not wanting any items, but for the sheer fact that I had no money left on me.
"I can't believe you did that to me Neku!" Shiki refused to look at me the entire walk home. I looked at Shiki and started to say something but stopped. Shiki was holding piggy with both arms, cuddling it as if it were a precious item. Her hair blew softly in the wind. The sun was just setting, and it cast a sort of glow on Shiki, and there it was again. That feeling, it couldn't be. Luckily at that moment Shiki chose to forgive me.
"Hey it's alright I guess, can't blame you for being poor," She laughed quietly.
"Yeah… Hey!" I turned to Shiki to see her holding a hand to her face to stop the laughing.
"You should see the look on your face right now, I'm only teasing." We kept walking for a while but it started getting dark. The street lights came on and it was nearly pitch black.
"I..I…It's c…c…cold out here Neku!" Shiki was shivering, I guess the whole fashion world doesn't concern much about someone's health. Her jacket was thin and seemed to retain little to no heat, her shirt seemed to be made of some thin material too.
"*sigh.* Here." I took off my jacket and handed it to Shiki. She looked stunned. "What? You don't want it?" I asked giving a playful smile, and began to pretend to put my jacket back on.
"No, that's not it. It's just… nothing" Shiki looked down, and it was hard to tell in the dark, but was she blushing? And what had she said earlier? I could have sworn I heard her say "cute", what was I ruining her cute outfit? Nonethe less she took the jacket and seemed to be doing much better.
"Thanks Neku… Neku?" It was really cold out here, and as chivalrous as giving my jacket away was, it still left me freezing. "Are you okay Neku?" Shiki looked genuinely concerned.
"Hey, im fine, didn't you want me to start caring for you guys more?" I laughed quietly at my own joke, but Shiki didn't seem to find it funny. You know, she actually is cute when she looks so concerned.
"Neku you look cold, are you sure you're okay?" she began to move closer to me, "I heard that you can actually share body heat, so do you want to… um…" She couldn't seem to get the right words out of her mouth, and I was about to decline when she suddenly blurted out "I think he should hug!" and instantly she seemed to regret it, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry Neku, I didn't know what I was thinking!" She seemed so embarrassed, and for whatever reason, I found it cute. She ran ahead and stopped at the next streetlight. I caught up and put an arm on her shoulder. I was about to pull her around when I heard some soft whimpering, was she, crying?
"Shiki, are you, okay?" I didn't know what to say.
"I…I'm fine Neku. Thanks for caring." She got up, and seemed to have recovered from whatever had made her sad earlier. Her cheery smile returned, but there was a hint of deception in her words when she said, "I'm sure I'm fine, lets get home already." We walked the rest of the way home in silence.
I definitely got an earful from Mr. Misaki upon entering Shiki's house. I turned on my music without him noticing and began playing some music, just loud enough to tone out his nagging. I caught some of the things he said like "worthless" and "garbage" but just kept nodding my head. Eventually he went inside and left me and Shiki to our goodbye.
"Um, Neku, thanks for your jacket. Here." She handed me the jacket and I took it in my hand. I thought of something cool to say like No problem, or it was no big deal, I wasn't cold anyway, but my brain failed me and all that came out of my mouth was a "mhm" type sound. Shiki stood at the door looking like she expected something, but almost seemed disappointed when I began to walk away. I didn't hear from her the next day. The next time we decided to meet up, was a week later. Beat and Rhyme had already said that they couldn't go, their grandmother was in town and they had to spend time with her. So it was just Shiki Eri and me for the day. Eri was just as outgoing as Shiki had portrayed, if not worse. She constantly went on about how much she loved design, but how her creations were only mediocre, a level of modesty I guess. She and Shiki seemed to be having a great time, spending my money, using me as a pack horse, yay great fun. Towards the end of the day I was still lagging behind a bit, with the weight of all the bags I had to carry when I caught just a word or two of what Shiki and Eri were saying
"Come on Shiki, cheer up!" I picked the perfect time to walk up, Shiki turned to see me, and began to run.
"Shiki wait!" and Eri was gone too. Here I was standing in the middle of the street, with bags full of women's clothing, and two girls running away from me. It only took me an hour to get to Shiki's house (a 20 min detour to drop off Eri's clothes) and luckily for me, her parents weren't home this time.
"Shiki! It's me Neku! Open up please." No response. Her front door was slightly open, so I let myself in. I don't know why I did it, but I acted on impulse, something was wrong with my friend, and I wanted to help. Woah, that was new, did I just show… compassion? What is happening to me?
I found Shiki lying on her bed, with her head buried in a pillow, hugging her piggy tight. I didn't know what to do, but my brain did. I knocked on the open door three times.
"Neku!" Shiki looked surprised and… was that happiness? But it was gone right away. "did you really carry all those bags here?" I looked down and saw that I was in fact still carrying her clothing.
"Well yeah, I mean I did pay for them." She looked disappointed at that response Nice one brain.
"Well you can just drop them off there I guess." She looked down and played a little with the pig. I needed to say something, but what?
"Piggy is looking good." I said
"He's a cat!" she shouted indignantly, but laughed, it was a little running joke we had I guess.
"Look," I started, I didn't know where I was going with this, but I was going through with it. Sorry Beat but I'm going to have to borrow your line here.
"Look Shiki, I heard what you said the other day," She gasped,
"Neku look, I didn't mean it. I only meant like a brother!" she was so red in the face that I thought she was going to faint.
"What? No I just… I just need to get something out. Look I have learned to trust my partners since the UG, but I need you to know that, Shiki, you're not my partner." She seemed heartbroken, uh oh, what did I do? I think I saw tears forming in her eyes, "wait Shiki! Let me finish, you're not my partner, you're more than that, you're my friend. And I can't bear to see anything bad happen to you. So could you just tell me what's wr…" I was cut off Shiki had lunged towards me and had me in a full embrace.
"Neku… I…" I was dumbfounded, what was going on? I didn't know what I was doing, but I subconsciously placed one arm around Shiki and returned her hug. Suddenly she began to cry.
"Shiki, what's wrong? Did I do something wrong?" I let go because I thought I had hit her or something but she only pulled me in closer,
"No, Neku, it's just that… I…. I love…" What was she going to say? Why is my heart racing so fast right now? "I love….d Don Kai's ramen so much… can… we get another…" She said that last part so slowly, and with so much disappointment, that I knew it was a lie. She seemed near tears though, so I decided not to push it too hard.
"Well I guess we're going to Ramen Don then." I smiled, if anything to encourage Shiki. I think I finally understand what was happening… to me, and with Shiki.
Chapter 3: Shiki
Why why why! Why couldn't I tell Neku? Why did I stop. Why am I making him walk me all the way back to Ramen Don?! Shiki loved Ramen don's ramen, but she didn't have much of an appetite tonight, and Neku seemed to notice it.
"Shiki something wrong?" he hadn't eaten much either, I noted, but was it out of sympathy for me, or was something wrong with him too. I didn't know what to say, but apparently Ken did,
"Hey you two, you haven't touched your ramen yet, is something wrong?" Neither of us spoke, I played with my hair and Neku adjusted his headphones. Leave it to Ken to make an awkward situation even worse. "You know, you two would make a cute couple!" He exclaimed and laughed at his own joke. I laughed along quietly and turned to see Neku. He had pulled his collar up all the way so you couldn't even see his eyes now. I had to leave. With no warning I just got up and ran.
"Shiki! Where are you going?!" I heard Neku yell, and I just ran faster and faster till I saw it, the statue of Hachiko, I'd hide out there for a while, collect my thoughts, then make up a story about how my parents needed me. I was just crossing the street when I heard a loud screech and a horn. The world stopped, or at least was in slow motion for me. I turned to see a white car speeding towards me, desperately trying to stop, I closed my eyes and waited for the impact and then… huh, I thought a car hitting me would hurt more I felt a firm shove come from my side… but… the car was in front of me. Then a crunch and a scream. "Neku!"
Neku:
Shiki, you dumb girl, where are you going? I swear, if this is some scheme to get me to go shopping again… huh.
"Shiki! Look out!... Damn it, she can't hear me." The car, she's stunned, she can't move. I don't know what came over me, but all I knew was at this moment, at that second, I had one thought in my mind. CRASH
Chapter 2: Shiki
"N…Neku? NEKU!" I was bawling, in the middle of a public place, but it didn't matter to me right now. The only thing that mattered was the seemingly lifeless body in front of me. It amazed me, Neku was a fighter, even with a direct impact from a car, he seemed fine. That was the problem, not external blood, but a small stream of blood began to fall from his mouth. I was in the middle of wiping the blood when he started to speak.
"Shiki… I…" his voice was raspy and weak. He seemed to be hurting just trying to form the words, "Ironic, huh, this is, where, met, me, you." He coughed violently, blood splattered over the sidewalk.
"Someone call the paramedics!" I called desperately, why was everyone just standing there? "Please someone help!" then I saw a familiar face in the crowd. "Beat! Please, call the police, its… it's Neku!"
"Hm? What's wrong with…. PHONES?! Who the hell did this to you? I swear, I'll beat the living…"
"Beat! Not the time! He was hit by a car, please call someone!" I was desperate, I don't know what I was thinking, all I know is that I had so many regrets at this time. It should have been me, why did I run, why didn't I tell Neku sooner? Neku coughed one more time and began to speak once more,
"Shiki, I.. I" more violent coughing, "I learned so much in my time with you, you taught me compassion, to see past someone's appearances." I was near tears, was he trying to thank me? "I didn't have any friends, and in the UG you came to me and asked to be my partner, I acted all tough, but I think… I think deep down, I knew you were my friend." He smiled a weak smile
"Neku, please, stay with me! Beat is calling the hospital, they'll be here any second now.
"No, Shiki, I, if, die, I need you to know…" He began to say something in such a low tone that I could hardly make it out when,
"Move move move! Paramedics!" They began to wheel Neku out on a stretcher into the ambulance, the sight was awful, Neku, bleeding from his mouth, probably internally too, hopefully he was just unconscious, but the Neku I once knew, the strong, introverted Neku, now lay helpless. I didn't get any sleep that night. Beat, Rhyme, even Eri tried consoling me, they visited me often with gifts, that I accepted and thanked them half-heartedly. I visited Neku every day. They say he had slipped into a deep sleep, and should make a full recovery within a week or two. Hah! A week or two. The sheer irony in that statement made me laugh a sad sad laugh. 2 weeks… the reapers game all over again. For now I would just have to wait. Those 2 weeks were longer than the reapers game, longer than a school week I don't know, I couldn't put it in words. The day Neku finally was due to get out, I waited with Mr. Mew, I had it all set out in my mind, Neku would come out fully recovered and would probably say hmph! You brought the piggy with you? And I would just react normally. But I would tell him everything, and I mean everything, it was now or never I guess. How wrong I could have been, how wrong, how late. The nurse came out with a sad look on her face. My smile instantly faded, she came over and asked if I was Shiki Misaki, I didn't know what to say. I must have stammered out a yes, because she had me sit down. The news hit me like a bullet. Neku Sakuraba had died over the night. His brain died sometime around 10:34 apparently. The doctor gave me some more details but I didn't want to hear it. I was on my way out when she called after me.
"Oh yeah, he was writing something in his last few days, when he could finally move. He seemed to be in so much pain, but he said it was important. And, it's for you."
She handed me the note, it was small, written on one of the hospitals papers. On it were scrawled just a short note, a note that would break my heart. Hey, Shiki, Doc says I'll be out tomorrow, pain hurts like hell, but I can't wait to see you… There's something I gotta tell you. Sorry this note is so short, but lights out it at 10, sorry. But I'll see you tomorrow anyway, so I don't know why I'm even writing this out. Oh well. That day I found something out, I found out Neku Sakuraba was dead, and he wasn't coming back. He had broken the rules during the game and was banned from playing ever again. What could I do.
There was no words to describe what happened to me. I guess you could say, Shiki Misaki died, and in her place, I was left. A hollow empty skeleton of who I used to be. I no longer helped Eri with her designs, I didn't talk to Rhyme or Beat, not that they were talking either. None of us seemed to take Neku dying very lightly. The only comfort I had was with Mr. Mew whenever I saw him, I thought of Neku calling him piggy, and it almost brought I smile to my face, almost. Weeks went by, and I had no hopes of seeing Neku again, my life was pretty much an empty shell. Beat Rhyme and I went down the Neku's grave to pay our respects. Who knew Beat could give such a heartwarming speech. "He was just such a good friend, y'know" Beat was trying 110% to try not to cry, and constantly had to hug Rhyme. After they left, I stood by the grave, and planted my flowers. Then I made a very hard decision. I put Mr. Mew down on the grave, "I put my heart and soul into Mr. Mew, Neku, if you can hear me… it belongs to you now." I left Mr. Mew in a special spot. When he was buried, Beat had placed Neku's old headphones next to his grave "As a reminder, ya' know?" And we all understood, it was what Neku would have wanted. I put Mr. Mew down and left. I didn't think I would be going back. How wrong I was. I found myself addicted to the spot. For some reason, I felt like Neku was there with me. Every Friday, after school, I would go to the graveyard, and just talk. I would clean his headphones and Mr. Mew, I would plant new flowers and clean the grave. I would talk to no one about how much Neku meant to me, how much I missed him, how much… I loved him. I went back every week and before I knew it, it was the one year anniversary of Neku's death. I went back with no special plans in mind. But I was shocked at what I saw. Neku's headphones… Mr. Mew they were gone! I fell onto my knees and burst into tears. How could someone do this! To rob a grave was a terrible thing to do. I was crying for what seemed like hours when suddenly a gruff voice spoke. "You okay there?" the voice was soft and caring, it seemed somewhat familiar but I didn't care.
"Look, I just want to be alone right now, okay?" I assumed it was someone from school who recognized me, and to be honest, I really just wanted to be left alone.
"But Shiki… I" the voice sounded a little desperate, or was it sad?
"Look! Just leave me alone will you!" I screamed, maybe a little to harshly. But the reaction I got was nothing I would ever have expected.
"Jeez! Shiki! I don't see you for a year and when I return this is what I get? I even go out to get Piggy cleaned for you." The voice was teasing me, I looked up, and nearly fainted.
"Neku! Neku!" I was crying for the first time in a year, out of happiness instead of sadness.
"Hey there." His voice was so soft, so kind, how I missed it. I guess while crying I had thrown myself into his arms, and had begun to sob into his chest. Neku was back!
"Sorry about your jacket." I said kind of embarrassed. Then I realized something, "How are you back?! You can't play the game anymore!" Was this Neku fake? No, he couldn't be, that hug was way too real. Maybe… he was a ghost? No, that couldn't be it either. Seeing the confusion on my face Neku laughed.
"Well, it's kind of a long story." I don't know what it was, but something about Neku had changed, he was stronger, more confident, and definitely a lot more open.
"It's actually a really long story, like about a year long."
Neku POV:
"I… I died…. Again… WHAT THE HELL!? But I guess its okay. I saved Shiki at least. So im in the UG again huh? Hmph, hasn't changed. No reapers though, I guess no games have started then." I took a quick look around and no players, only people from the RG.
"You were right Neku, no games." I spun around and saw Joshua. Oh no, not Joshua! Was this going to turn into some sort of gay love story? As if sensing my skepticism Joshua looked disgusted.
"Neku, don't even flatter yourself. I have a girlfriend to let you know." Well that was one problem solved.
"Joshua, why am I here? Where is everyone?" He gave me a smile and a laugh
"Neku, you were banned from the official games alright? You CAN'T play." I drooped my head, there was no hope, I guess I would never see Beat or Rhyme again, not even… Shiki.
"Ugh… Neku Neku Neku still as clueless as ever I see. You obviously didn't hear me. You were banned from the OFFICIAL games." I was lost, "I am the conductor Neku, and you happened to make a pretty strong friend. How about this, I take the Shiki girl as your fee and you play through a week?" No I thought, absolutely no! I would not put Shiki through that again.
"No deal Josh, I don't even have any pins." He laughed.
"Fine, then how about this, you can play for a whole year, no tasks with noise, just simple things like, oh I don't know, do my laundry, pick up my mail." He was enjoying this way to much, a whole year! I didn't know if I could do it. Joshua seemed to sense the doubt in me and added, "Oh, and you can have Fridays off, you may want to go to your grave on those days. So I went on with Joshua's little game and come Friday I went to my grave. It was awkward at first, seeing my grave. And I saw my headphones, they were slightly cracked from the crash, but fine nonetheless. Beat's idea obviously to put the headphones there. How nice of him. Suddenly I hear footsteps behind me and turn to see my friends walking in. "Guys! I shout out and run towards them. I am about an inch away when woosh they walk right through me. "Right… I'm dead" the realization hurt, but all I could do is watch. I saw Beat's speech and it brought a tear to my eyes. Rhyme, such a small girl, and yet so brave. She was not crying, but the quivering of her lower lip told a different story. I was paralyzed, I couldn't move. Then they left. I wanted to say something, to do something, but what could I do? Then I saw Shiki put Pig… Mr. Mew down, "I put my heart and soul into Mr. Mew, Neku, if you can hear me… it belongs to you now." I couldn't help it anymore, I began to tear up a little.
"Shiki, that's such a cheesy line." I told myself in between eye wipes. Suddenly she turned around and looked straight at me. Could she see me? I got my hopes up too high. "Neku… I… I almost feel like he's here with me right now." I wanted to scream out I'm here! But she couldn't hear me. Instead I found myself going back every Friday to hear Shiki talk, and with her, I would tell her how I was doing, and how I was counting the days till I could see her again. Although we were a dimension apart, I felt like, at that moment, with Shiki, we were together again.
After being away from Shiki for so long made me think, I… I think that I loved her, but I didn't know how to tell her. It had been She wouldn't let me out of her sights. She visited my house frequently which my parents found cute. They asked if we were going out after Shiki left, which left me embarrassed for I was without an answer. Then, everything would change, change for the worst. A change that would make me wish I was back in the UG wish that I really was dead. It all started with that one phone call.
"Hey Shiki…"
"Oh Neku! How're you felling? I was just going to come visit you!"
"Uhh yeah, about that, I was wondering… Could you meet me at Ramen Don, say an hour from now?"
"Um, sure Neku. That'll give me enough time to get ready." I couldn't be sure, but I swear Shiki was hiding the excitement in her voice.
An hour from then, I was sitting at our usual table thinking, thinking about, how to tell Shiki. We were both well over 18 now, one more year, college, real life, we couldn't be sure that we'd ever see her again. I had to do this now. I was still deep in thought when Shiki sat down.
"Hey Neku." Her voice startled me, and I began to say something completely intelligent, like Hi, or sup. But then I saw her. She looked gorgeous today, her hair was down, but slightly curled, She was wearing her usual green jacket with a white blouse underneath it. She was wearing some light makeup, nothing major, just some blush… or was she really just blushing.
"Well are you going to say something or just stare?" She giggled and seemed to find the look on my face funny. I wanted to say something like I you're beautiful, or I LOVE YOU! But all that came out was
"Wow…" and continued to stare. Shiki laughed for a while, and we eventually ordered. We had barely started eating when Shiki noticed that I hadn't eaten yet.
"This again Neku?" She put her chopsticks down and looked at me.
"No, this time it's different. Shiki, I need you to know…" My voice trailed off, my throat felt dry.
"What is it Neku?" Shiki looked very interested in what I had to say, and if anything, her support was down right intimidating.
"Um, you were just so kind to me, for this past year you've… always been here for me." I felt the blood rushing to my face, I suddenly began to sweat. "And, I was really starting to think… you know… about us." Shiki's eyes seemed to light up. I swallowed what was left of my pride and continued to speak. "Yeah, I want to thank you for that, but I want you to know. That we're not friends." Suddenly, all the blood drained from Shiki's face. Oh crap, what had I done? "No, no, no Shiki you don't understand, I don't mean it like that, I'm just trying to say that I don't think you're pretty…"
"Just stop Neku!" Her voice was harsh and biting, but very sad. She seemed near tears. "If you came here just to insult me, make fun of me… then you might as well leave." She began to cry, I felt awful"I finally get it okay?" Did she really? My heart lightened up a little. " I understand that you will never love me! You haven't changed at all Neku Sakuraba, I… I hate you!" She screamed the word hate so loudly, so powerfully, and so truthfully, that there was no doubt that she meant it with all her heart. She stormed out of the restaurant without a word, her hands to her face trying to shield her eyes, streaming with tears. I felt awful, and held the little black box in my hand… I played with it a little in my hand and eventually opened it. A single ring, meant for a single person. Gah I hated myself. Even worse, I noticed that Shiki had left a little black bad next to her seat. I picked it up and looked inside. At first I had thought that she left Piggy here, but what I saw made my heart sink into my stomach. It was a custom made Mr. Mew with a purple jacket, and spiky… orange… hair was it supposed to be me? She… she had made a present for me, why was I so bad with words? I had tried my best to confess to Shiki, but… but… Nothing, I had no one to blame for this but me.
I spent the next week or so not seeing Shiki, her parents hadn't seen her either. Beat and Rhyme hadn't seen her in weeks, but said that they think Eri had seen her. I visited Eri and she seemed as mad at me as Shiki was. She let me in, but let me in anyway. "Shiki is really mad you know. She came to me crying about how you broke her heart." I didn't have the time or patience to put up with Eri right now.
"Where did she go?" I asked snappily, apparently Eri didn't like that.
"You show up here, having hurt my best friend, and now you're rude to me?" Eri seemed more hurt than anything. I guess I had to take this from a different angle.
"I'm sorry, I just have to make things right with her right now." Eri didn't seem too sure what to think. She started at me for a while, and I guess she decided that I was being honest.
"I don't know where she went, she just said something about saying goodbye." She sighed and walked out of the room. It was obvious that I wasn't going to get any more information from Eri. But that was fine, I got all that I needed for today. I left Eri's house and headed for the cemetery. I guess my hunch was right, because I found Shiki sitting by my grave crying softly. She hadn't seen me yet, so this was my chance to start this off right.
"Hi," I stammered, nice one… Shiki turned around surprised and darted off.
"Shiki wait!" I chased after her but she was pretty fast, she managed to run all the way into 104 before I finally caught up. "Shiki just listen!"
"No Neku, I get it, you will never love me okay!" I let go of her and let her run. I was so hurt. Did she really feel that way? Why was I so bad with words. I felt so angry with myself, how could I let Shiki feel like this? I followed her a little farther but she noticed I was following.
"Just leave me alone!" she started walking a little more briskly, but I could tell she almost wanted me to catch up.
"You're having too much fun with this!" I yelled after her. What was that? A smile? "Look Shiki, about the other day, I didn't mean it. I mean I did, but it came out wrong, and I just freaked, and I didn't know what to say, and I saw you're present and I felt awful and… and…" I was at a loss for words, there was so much that I wanted to say, so much I had to say. So much I didn't know how to say. I calmed myself down. Shiki was still looking at me quizzically, but I could tell that I had her attention. " Look, Shiki. What I said the other day, I meant it." She looked disheartened.
"Oh… I had figured as much, you don't seem the type to lie. I guess I'll just leave you alone then." She began to walk away looking sadder than ever. I grabbed her arm and spun her around. She seemed shocked, almost scared. We stood there staring at each other for a while; I figured if something was going to be done, it had to be done now. I pulled Shiki in close, and kissed her. I didn't have much experience with kissing anyone, let me change that statement, it was my first kiss ever. Her lips were soft, and somewhat sweet. I saw the look on Shiki's face, a mixture of surprise and happiness, but she closed her eyes and returned the kiss anyway. When we pulled away, Shiki's face was bright red.
"Neku… I…" But I cut her off. I had to say something here.
"Shiki look, about what I said earlier, you're not my friend, you are so much more than that to me. I… I'm not really good with words so… um." Shiki smiled and stopped me halfway.
"I know, I realized a while ago, that you were trying to compliment me… and I realize that I'm not as pretty as Eri, or other people…" She seemed so unsure about herself, I had to do something.
"I know Shiki, you have to know, you're not pretty, you're beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful." Shiki looked surprised, I guess she wasn't used to hearing things like that, or maybe, she wasn't used to hearing me say nice things. I couldn't just let up here.
"And when I saw the present you had left me, I was heartbroken. It was so nice, so thoughtful. I honestly hated myself for it. Shiki we graduated last summer… err, at least you did, I was dead… but that's besides the point. Shiki, I… well… you know… kinda… love you… I guess…" At the end my voice trailed off, and I said it so softly that I almost hoped she didn't hear it. But it was so obvious that she did. She lunged at me and managed to tackle me to the ground.
"Neku! That was so sweet!" she seemed so happy at that moment, but I wasn't done there.
"Look Shiki, we're going off to college soon, and we might lose contact… but, I don't want that to happen. You're important to me." I didn't know what I was doing, we were still young, but she was special to me, she was the only girl I have ever really liked. Sigh. "Look, here." I looked away, and held my hand out, she took the box, and I turned completely around, my face was burning. What am I doing? I heard Shiki, gasp, and let out a happy joyful scream.
"Neku, does this mean what I think it does?" She seemed so happy, she was practically jumping with joy. "But wait." She seemed to realize what the problem is. "We're too young to get married Neku." She almost sounded disappointed.
"Yeah… I know Shiki, but, I was thinking, after college… will you take the ring, just as insurance?" Shiki looked somewhat confused.
"Insurance for what Neku?" She tilted her head to one side when asking the question. It was cute, when she tilted her head, her hair sort of fell to one side, and her glasses were somewhat sat crooked on her face.
"Insurance… that you'll marry me?" I couldn't look her straight in the face when asking her, my face was too red anyways. Shiki stood there stunned, staring at me, analyzing my face, trying to tell if I was being serious.
"I'm serious you know. I really love you…" Shiki still looked somewhat stunned, but regained her regular composure.
"You know what Neku, I don't think I'm ready for marriage just yet." She said handing me the small black box back. I was horrified, I guess she still didn't love me after all. I began to walk away, but heard Shiki laugh. When I turned around, she jumped on me and gave me a kiss.
"But that doesn't mean that I don't love you." She gave a mischievous wink and said, "why don't we just take things slow at first… boyfriend?" She smiled and extended her hand. I looked down, smiled, and took her hand. We had just begun walking when Shiki began to laugh.
"You know my parents aren't home." She started furiously giggling, "Maybe you want to come over tonight?" She was giggling, and blushing but I almost feel like she was being serious. Oh god this is going to be interesting. But that was a story for another day.
END
