Emmett's list of things he can't do
Pat Jacob on the head a go "good doggy"
Or any one in a wolf pack for that matter
Dance to Akon "smack that" while wearing a mini skirt and rose's stripper high heels
Give any sort of energy drink or candy to Alice
Or Bella
And the excuse "I gave that to her so u guys could have hyper sex" after u give them sugar wouldn't work (jasper might be happy with the Idea but not Edward)
Do not jump on Bella's bed when she is a sleep and say " wake up call belly"
Tell Renesme about the birds and the bees
Go up to Aro and say "Sup my homey" in a gangster voice.
Though a surprise birthday for Marcus
Go to Bella's Hens party and be the male striper
Trick Mike Newton into being Edwards best friend
And say "I only did that so he could have a friend"
Play 7 mins in heaven with Nessie and Jacob
Or blow and suck
Or spin the bottle
Create a sex room for Bella and Edward
Or Nessie and Jacob
Create an army of vampire bunnies and name them all fluffy 1,2,3,4,ect
Give Edward a pamphlet saying "how to come out of the closet"
Give Edward a talk about performance problems
