Emmett's list of things he can't do

Pat Jacob on the head a go "good doggy"

Or any one in a wolf pack for that matter

Dance to Akon "smack that" while wearing a mini skirt and rose's stripper high heels

Give any sort of energy drink or candy to Alice

Or Bella

And the excuse "I gave that to her so u guys could have hyper sex" after u give them sugar wouldn't work (jasper might be happy with the Idea but not Edward)

Do not jump on Bella's bed when she is a sleep and say " wake up call belly"

Tell Renesme about the birds and the bees

Go up to Aro and say "Sup my homey" in a gangster voice.

Though a surprise birthday for Marcus

Go to Bella's Hens party and be the male striper

Trick Mike Newton into being Edwards best friend

And say "I only did that so he could have a friend"

Play 7 mins in heaven with Nessie and Jacob

Or blow and suck

Or spin the bottle

Create a sex room for Bella and Edward

Or Nessie and Jacob

Create an army of vampire bunnies and name them all fluffy 1,2,3,4,ect

Give Edward a pamphlet saying "how to come out of the closet"

Give Edward a talk about performance problems