This fanfic was written for the Prumano Secret Santa event. The recipient is sayaleigh, and the prompt I decided to use was an AU in which Lovino and Antonio are roommates.

A CAKE WORTH THE CANDLE

"You know, I think this would go faster if you helped me a little."

Lovino looked up from the magazine he was reading on the couch and regarded Antonio with an unimpressed glance.

"What for? It's your friends who are coming over. I'm not cleaning for them," he said and returned his attention to the pictures of first-class cooking utensils. Shit, it would be years before he'd be able to afford something like that, but dreams cost nothing.

"But these are your clothes on the floor! And I always clean everything anyway. It's not really fair."

"I gave you my conditions when you asked me to be your roommate. Decent meals and no cleaning duty were the bare minimum."

"Haha, yeah, but I thought you were just joking," Antonio said with a long-suffering smile on his face.

Lovino shifted his feet when Antonio came over to arrange the pillows on the couch and take away the old newspapers and dirty coffee cups. It wasn't that he enjoyed acting like a roommate from hell, but what else was he supposed to do when Antonio kept inviting his idiot friends over almost every night? Their apartment was small, so there was no place for Lovino to escape their loud conversation and laughter, and he refused to be chased out of his own home. Acting like a spoiled brat was the only way he knew how to let him know that he was unhappy.

Suddenly, Antonio froze in the middle of his work. "Oh, I forgot that I promised to make some coca de recapte! I have to hurry to the store or I won't get everything done! Keep an eye on the place, okay, Lovi?"

Lovino grunted a dismissive reply of agreement. After Antonio had left and he had waited a moment to make sure he wouldn't be coming back – he usually forgot something whenever he went out – he got off the couch and put his magazine away. He'd do some cleaning now that Antonio was gone. He liked helping Antonio; he just couldn't bring himself to do it right when he asked.

"I don't even know why he bothers to clean for those assholes," he muttered as he began to collect the dirty dishes in the sink.

He and Antonio had been rommates for a couple of months, but they had known each for much longer. Their families had lived in the same street, and they had spent so much time at each other's houses that they had practically grown up as brothers.

Antonio was a couple of years older than him and had gone to college first. He was studying Economics of all things, and while Lovino couldn't say he understood how he managed to keep any of it in his head, he supposed it made some sense. Antonio had always had a greedy side to balance his friendliness and would no doubt put his degree to an efficient use.

Lovino's field was Agriculture, which he was hoping would prove useful if he opened his own little wine farm one day. It was a big if as his family wasn't exactly swimming in money, but he needed to have some goal in his life or he'd just end up wasting his days doing nothing.

He was half-way through the dishes when there was a knock at the entrance So, Antonio had forgotten his keys after all. Typical. Lovino wiped his hands on a towel and went to the door.

However, it wasn't Antonio's face he saw when he opened it.

"Fuck!" Lovino swore and tried to shove the door shut, but the guest got his leg inside before he managed.

"Ow! Hey, what the hell? Are you trying to break my bones? Let me in!"

"No! Go away!"

"I was invited!"

They spent a moment struggling with the door, but it didn't take long before Lovino was overpowered and had to step back, allowing the intruder to enter. He huffed and pressed his lips into an irritated line. Gilbert Beilschmidt was the last person he wanted to see, for more than one reason.

Gilbert had started college together with Antonio, and from what Lovino could gather, they had become friends instantly. That was just one thing he didn't like about Gilbert – he and Antonio had had two years to get to know each other and get close without him. Perhaps it wasn't healthy, but since Lovino had such trouble making friends, he tended to be jealous of the few he actually had.

"You're early. Antonio isn't even here," he said.

"So? I can just hang around and wait for him."

"Ugh, whatever. Just don't bother me."

Another reason he didn't like Gilbert was that he actually did like him. He was obnoxious and full of himself, but Lovino couldn't hate him after he had fixed their shower when the hot water had stopped. One time he had dropped over and brought him food when he had been down with the flu and Antonio had been off visiting his family for the weekend. Lovino hated admitting it, but it was then that his stupid and pathetic crush had started developing.

That was why he didn't want to be alone with Gilbert. It was a constant battle between wanting to hit on him and hiding under his bed.

"Goddammit, I should have decided to live alone," he muttered as he returned to doing the dishes. He took his frustration out on them, so there was soon a soapy water all over the floor and his clothes. He was lucky most of the plates and cups were plastic because he had the feeling he would have broken a few otherwise.

"With what money?" Gilbert asked.

"I wasn't talking to you!"

"There's nobody here but me!"

"I can talk to myself if I want to, asshole! I told you not to bother me!"

"Fine, be like that. I'm just going to have an awesome time by myself and not pay any attention to you!" Gilbert huffed and took a more comfortable position on the couch. He lifted his feet up on the armrest, crossed his hands behind his head and closed his eyes, making a show of trying to fall asleep.

Lovino said nothing, already regretting his outburst. He didn't want to act like a dick to Gilbert. It was just that he didn't know what else he could do because if he was nice to him, Gilbert would be nice to him, too, and then he'd like him even more. Only rejection and embarrassment would follow, and he had had enough of both in his life.

For a while, the only sounds in the room were the splashing of water and utensils making noise in the sink. Lovino was determined to finish soon so that he could flee to the bedroom that he and Antonio shared and lock the door.

Despite his resolve, he found himself turning around to glance at Gilbert over his should in a regular pattern. He kept telling himself it was because he had every right to be suspicious of him. Maybe he'd sneak up on him and try something stupid as revenge for yelling at him.

However, nothing of the sort happened. Gilbert remained on the couch, unmoving. Maybe he'd fallen asleep for real. Dammit. That was Lovino's favourite spot, and now it was contaminated. He wouldn't be able to lie there without thinking that it was almost the same as lying on Gilbert, ugh, fuck.

He wiped his hands on a towel and walked over to get a better look at the other. Maybe he'd do something embarrassing to him while he slept, like draw a moustache on him with a permanent marker. Ha, that would teach him!

But when he got closer to Gilbert, he noticed that something was off. He was completely still. Not even his chest was moving in rhythm with his breathing. Hell, was he even breathing anymore?

"Hey, you okay?" Lovino asked and poked him with his foot. It got him no reaction, and suddenly he had no idea what to do. Had he had a stroke or something? He was pretty damn pale all the time, so maybe he was sick somehow.

"This isn't funny!" he snapped. What the fuck was he supposed to do? He didn't want a dead German in his hands! His potato-brained brother would blame him, and he'd go to jail and never have that farm of his dreams.

Lovino knelt by the couch and pressed his ear against Gilbert's chest to check if his heart was still beating. Immediately, he recognised the sound of it thumping, and there didn't seem to be anything wrong with it. In fact, it was getting louder and faster the longer he kept his head there.

What was he supposed to do? Give him CPR? He had no idea how. He had never bothered to learn, but he figured he couldn't just punch Gilbert in the face and hope for the best.

"Start breathing, dammit!" He grabbed a firm hold of Gilbert's nose and tilted his head backwards in an uncertain attempt to get started, but that was when the other let out a loud snorting sound and began to sit up.

"I can't believe you fell for that! Hahaha!"

"What?"

"Oh, look at your face! When you're all bewildered like that, you're actually pretty cute."

"You mean that whole thing was fake? You were awake the whole time?"

"Yeah! Like there could ever be anything wrong with me! I'm in perfect health!" Gilbert patted his chest for emphasis, but Lovino wasn't impressed. To show just how pissed off he was, he drove his fist into Gilbert's stomach and made him bend over on the couch.

"Ow, hey! What was that for?"

"You ask me that? What the fuck did you do that for? I thought you were dying on me! Fuck you!"

"Hey, I just wanted to see what you'd do! It's no fun when you ignore me all the time. Thanks for freaking out. It's nice to know you care."

Lovino gave Gilbert a hard shove. "I don't care about you! I care about not getting sued because you died and I was the only person around! And if that's your best shot at trying to get someone's attention, you're pretty damn pathetic!"

"I'm not!" Gilbert responded to his shove with one of his own that almost sent Lovino on his back to the floor.

"Normal people don't do things like that!"

There was a couch pillow on the floor, and Lovino grabbed it and threw it at Gilbert. The other caught it in his hands and tossed it back, and for a while they just kept flinging it back and forth and calling each other stupid. Lovino failed to catch Gilbert's latest throw, which sent the pillow further away on the floor. They both dashed after it in an effort to get it first, ending up trying to wrestle it out of each other's hands.

"It's my turn, dammit!"

"There are no rules in war!"

Gilbert was stronger, so it didn't take long before he had the pillow, but with them practically tangled in each other's limbs, there was little he could do with it. It was only now that they had stopped that Lovino realised how uncomfortably close they were.

"Move!" he whined and tried to push Gilbert away.

"Why me? You move!"

"I'm tired after you dragged me into that dumb fight!"

"Huh, that little fooling around was enough to squeeze the juice out of you? You must be really out of shape! Here, rest a bit."

Gilbert shoved the pillow under Lovino's head so that it was more comfortable for him to lie on the floor. Lovino thanked him with an angry pout but made no move to take the pillow away. It was nice, even if the gesture had come from a total asshole.

"But wow, I haven't played around like this in ages, either! Ludi never wants to do this with me anymore."

"Isn't he around Feliciano's age? Who the hells plays kids' games as an adult?"

"You're older than him, and you just did it."

"You made me!"

"And you're the one who started!"

"Only because you pulled that stupid stunt on me!"

Lovino glared at Gilbert to show just how much he was pissing him off, but it didn't look like the message was getting through. The idiot sat up and was grinning like he hadn't seen a happier day, and Lovino couldn't understand what was so great about fighting like two five-year-olds.

"Heh, finally I got you to do something other than sulk to yourself." Gilbert said.

"What do you mean finally?"

"What, you haven't even noticed?"

"Noticed what?"

Gilbert sat up, and he was suddenly a very different person. The smile was replaced by a grumpy pout, and for some reason his cheeks were developing a redder shade even though he couldn't be exhausted anymore.

"Hmph, I don't get why you've never noticed me before. Look at how great I am. And yet I had to almost die before you started paying attention to me."

"You weren't dying! And if you wanted my attention, you could have tried something normal. What are you, a little kid who pulls the hair of the girl he likes?"

Based on the irritated look on Gilbert's face, he had just delivered a fatal blow. Lovino was ready to roll his eyes and laugh at him, but then he realised that if his words were true, that meant –

"Fuck, are you serious?" Gilbert, interested in him? Since when? He hadn't even realised he was into guys since he was always talking about some Erzsébet whenever dating came up.

"What if I am?"

"Then I'm going to... uhh... goddammit!" His face felt like it was hot enough to fry an egg on. Despite his crush, he had never in a million years planned on acting on it. Lovino was great at flirting with people casually, but he didn't have much experience with taking it any further than that. And he had decided, five minutes into first meeting him, that he wouldn't start with Gilbert. He wanted his inevitable big screw-up in love to be with someone who wouldn't rub it in and laugh at him and tell his friends all about it.

"So, I bet you totally want a piece of me, huh?" Gilbert said. He paused, but when Lovino didn't confirm his words in any way, he hurried to continue. "But if you don't, I guess that just means that you have a totally shitty taste! And I'm fine with that! I wouldn't want to go out with someone like that in a million years, so either way, this is a win-win scenario for me!"

"Stop spewing all this bullshit! I can't think!"

"So you aren't into me at all? Haha, wow. You're worse than I thought. Good we got this out of the way. Looks like I avoided a total disaster here. Oh, man, I'm so lucky."

Lovino tossed the pillow at Gilbert's face. "I haven't said anything yet, so shut up!" He drew a deep breath and tried to gather his thoughts. "It's a real shitty of you to surprise me like that. You could at least give me a warning!"

"Like what?"

"I don't know! Set the mood first!"

"What, you want a candlelit dinner or something? That's not really my thing."

"No, dumbass." Lovino crossed his arms on his chest and huffed. "Anything's better than what you just did."

"Okay, so will I get a different reaction if I run out real quick and get some flowers or something?"

"Don't bother. It's not worth the effort."

Gilbert's face fell for a moment, but he was quick to hide it. He crossed his hands behind his head and fell on his back on the floor. "Oh. At least I tried. Onwards to find new conquests!"

"You give up that easily? You can't have even meant it, then. Loser." It made sense, Lovino guessed. Maybe Gilbert had just been testing the waters for the sake of trying. The possibility bothered him more than he wanted to admit and left him with a disappointed itch he wanted to claw at.

"I always mean what I say! It's just that I'm so popular that this doesn't even register as rejection on my radar, so I don't have to care about it."

Then again, this was Gilbert. Even though Lovino didn't know him that well yet, he had learned a long time ago that he was full of shit. In this situation, he could possibly assume the opposite of what he was saying. And that meant this was probably his only chance if he wanted anything to develop between them.

"I haven't said no yet." He sat up and crawled over to Gilbert so that he could glare down on him. "I've just been calling you out on your bullshit."

"So..."

"Dammit, get the hint! If you want to go out or something, let's just fucking go! But it had better not be a waste of my time."

"Pfft, like you have anything better to do than go on a date with me!"

"As if you do!"

"Anyway, if we're going out some time, that means I can get a kiss, right? Kiss me!" Gilbert's smile was back, wider and happier than before, reminding Lovino of a kid who had just been given the keys to a candy store. It was weird to see someone be so delighted entirely because of him, but he liked it.

"Dinner first," he said.

"Aww, you mean I have to wait until we've eaten?"

"No, I mean you have to wait until we've gone out, and if the date sucks, I won't kiss you."

"But I want a kiss now!"

"Tch! Like I'd ever kiss you here. Antonio could come in at any moment!"

"So? I like danger! And if he sees us, just tell him you're giving me some CPR. He'll buy it."

Yeah, Antonio probably would. He just wasn't sure if he was ready to kiss Gilbert. He had fantasized about it a few times, but that was entirely different from sitting on the floor by his side, so close. This was real. He could do it in a second if he wanted to.

"Fuck my life," he muttered leaned closer to press his lips against Gilbert's before he'd chicken out or throw up because he was so nervous.

Gilbert let out a shocked squeak and did nothing to respond to the kiss. Lovino withdrew, feeling disappointed. He had imagined Gilbert would be rough and hot, but this was like kissing a dead fish.

"You lazy turd, if this is what it's going to be like –"

"No! You surprised me! Not fair!"

"You're the one who was talking about kissing a moment ago!"

"Yeah, and you said you wouldn't do it! Give me another chance! I'll blow your mind to pieces!" Gilbert puckered his lips in a way that didn't make the prospect of kissing him very appetizing, but Lovino figured out couldn't get any worse, so he leaned closer again –

– only to jump to his feet as the sound of a key turning in a lock caught him by surprise.

"I'm back!" Antonio announced cheerfully and opened the door. "Oh, Gilbert is already here. What are you doing on the floor?"

"He slipped," Lovino said, retreating from Gilbert as fast as he could.

"I hope you didn't kick him while was down. You should help him up. I'd do it myself, but I've got the groceries."

"He can get up on his own."

"Yeah, I'm strong! Anyway, did you get anything for me?"

"No, since you don't live here. But you're staying for dinner, right?"

"That's why I'm here! You invited me!"

Antonio put the groceries on the kitchen counter and began to unload them into the fridge and the cupboards. "You're a little early, though. Usually you and Francis don't show up until seven."

"Yeah, well, I had some business to take care of with Lovino. No big deal."

Lovino made himself busy by helping Antonio cook dinner, claiming loudly that he was needed or they'd end up having to order take-out. It was an obvious lie – everybody knew that Antonio was a great cook. But he needed to distract his mind and hands so that they wouldn't start to miss Gilbert and get him into an embarrassing mess.

There was no logical reason to keep anything a secret from Antonio. They had been friends all their lives. Lovino had never told him that he liked guys and not just girls, but he couldn't imagine it being a problem for him since he was friends with Francis, who had a boyfriend. He had just never found a suitable moment to tell him, and now he felt a little guilty that Gilbert had learned it before his best friend.

He kept his back to Gilbert as he worked and tried not to imagine what the other was doing. Part of him wanted to run straight back to him and find out just where they stood with each other now, but another part was ready to hide in his bed and never come out. He'd been acting like an idiot all evening, and Gilbert had to think that way, too. He should have tried to act cool, like he usually managed with girls.

Ugh, dammit. Maybe it would be less embarrassing if he made his move first and told Gilbert to forget what had happened.

"When is Francis coming?" Gilbert called out from the couch.

"In an hour, like we agreed last night," Antonio said.

"Hehe, I guess you're lucky that you get to enjoy my company for longer."

"We have to be careful, though. It shouldn't turn into too much of a good thing."

Lovino snorted at the vegetables he was cutting. It was sometimes hard to tell when Antonio was being a friendly idiot and when a dick, but he was pretty sure he wasn't trying to get under Gilbert's skin. And that meant it was Lovino's job to do it.

"It's rude to come over earlier than planned! But I bet you were raised in a root cellar, so it's no surprise."

"And I bet you're secretly glad that I'm here!"

"Like hell!"

Antonio laughed. "Oh, I'm so glad you're starting to get along."

"Does this look like getting along with someone, idiot?"

"But you're talking! You used to just glare at him whenever he dropped by. I was starting to get worried you wouldn't find any friends in college."

"I'm going to be even more than that!" Gilbert cut in.

"Yeah, you're usually a pretty great friend," Antonio said, and Lovino didn't know which of the two was a bigger dumbass.

"Fine, whatever. This place is filled with dumbasses, so I guess I have to lower my standards to zero."

Unlike Lovino had expected, the evening passed without being unbearable. Francis showed up, everybody talked about their classes and plans for the weekend, and for a while Lovino felt like everything was back to normal. It was only when Gilbert was preparing to leave that he realised how much he needed some kind of resolution to their earlier business.

"Lovino, I'm going to give you the honour of walking me home!" Gilbert announced as he was putting on his jacket.

"W-what? Why would I want to?"

Francis leaned his chin on his palm and smiled at him. "You should go. You probably don't even realise how much courage it took for him to say that."

"Hahaha, wrong! This battle is long over! I've won! I'm not nervous!"

Lovino snorted and grabbed his jacket. "I'm surprised you haven't peed your pants yet. But okay, I'll come with you, but only because I have to grab something at the store on the way."

Getting into the elevator and waiting for it to get down was awkward. Even Gilbert didn't say anything even though it was normally impossible to make him shut up.

"So, what the hell did you want to talk about?" Lovino asked once they were outside the building.

Gilbert suddenly grabbed him by the shoulders, eyes shining and a mad grin splitting his face. "I want to talk about our date! When are we going?"

"What, you still want to go?"

"Yeah!"

Lovino couldn't help but be surprised. He had been wondering if the whole thing had been just a joke for Gilbert, or that he had acted in the spur of a moment and would regret his words, the kiss, everything. But he guessed that had been just his own insecurities talking. Gilbert was the kind of guy who threw himself head-first into everything that got him excited. He wouldn't ask him out if he didn't mean it.

He shrugged. "I don't know. Whenever's fine."

"You don't sound like someone who's planning an awesome date with me. You should be more excited!"

Yeah, he should be. He had been battling with his attraction to Gilbert for so long he had been sure he'd go crazy, and now all the obstacles were out of his way. He no longer had to worry about whether Gilbert was into guys and that even if he were, whether he was into him. He had never seriously though he would get to this point, and now he had no idea what to do.

"Do you even want this?" Gilbert asked, enthusiasm fading from his face.

"Of course I do! Why would I be here otherwise?"

"Then you could be a little nicer to me, right? I mean, I didn't get into this because I like to be yelled at."

Lovino had to wonder why he had got into it in the first place, then, since he couldn't remember many times he had talked to Gilbert without yelling at him. But he was sure he'd discover that and more about him if they could stop the relationship from crashing and burning before it had even started.

"I yell when I'm nervous. It's nothing personal," he admitted.

"Huh, yeah, then it makes sense. I guess you're worried that you won't measure up when you go out with me."

Lovino was about to point out that it wasn't really that simple, but then Gilbert's lips were already on his, and this time it was Lovino who was surprised. He realised too late that he was supposed to kiss him back and made an awkward plunge forwards when Gilbert retreated. Embarrassed, he grabbed Gilbert's hair with both of his hands and pulled him into another kiss, longer and rougher and more intense than before.

"Heh, I don't think you have any reason to be nervous..." Gilbert said when they broke apart. "Anyway, you free tomorrow? I know a great place you'll like."

"As long as it's not some dumb burger joint." To be honest, Lovino wouldn't have minded if they had gone out that very moment, or if they had skipped the date and gone to Gilbert's place right away instead. But the part of him that wasn't giddy with the tingling of his lips and the excitement of something going right for once knew that he didn't want to move quite that fast.

"I'll surprise you."

"Okay, I'll be counting on that."

There wasn't much else to do, so Lovino said it was time for him to get back home because he had to finish an essay. It wasn't even a lie, but he still felt a little guilty about it. Gilbert didn't seem to mind, though, and they said a quick goodbye.

Lovino left, but every time he turned back to look, he saw Gilbert standing at the same spot, waving at him.

"Dumbass, are you going to be there all night?" he called out.

"Only until I can't see you anymore!"

Ugh, that was so lame he felt like dying. But he had the feeling that he had better get used to that sort of cute idiocy in the near future, and that he might even grow to like it.