Disclaimer: Yuugiou is the intellectual property of Kazuki Takahashi.
Note: When it comes to important days in Japan, New Years Eve is second only to New Years day. To this end, I am hoping that I decided to try to capture that feeling of preparing to start off the new year with a fresh, clean slate, bringing in a new beginning for that new year. Besides, everyone does Christmas stories, so why not bring out a different sort of celebration?
Final Minute
by Josie
Waking was a strange sensation, he decided, not so much for what it was, but for what it meant, especially for him. It wasn't waking in a normal sense, not for him; he hadn't had that in far too long. But neither was it a startlingly new sensation for him; he'd dealt with it once before, and previously it had been from a far longer period of time. It was an aching that pierced through every last piece of his being, sending fiery signals through his body that he was, in fact, alive.
Alive. That was a strange idea in and of itself, he concluded, and he was fairly certain that he probably shouldn't have even considered himself alive at all, nor should he have considered that he truly was alive previously, either. Regardless, there was a fine line between existence and life, and he had certainly crossed over it more than once.
Not that he'd been given much time to dwell on the idea. One hour. He had exactly one hour to get from where he was to where he needed to be, and, unfortunately, he hadn't the faintest idea of just where that was. Around him, he heard the shuffling of feet as children dragged behind their parents on the way to the nearest temple, and he couldn't help but smile at that. He'd only been through it once before, of course. The way that Japan celebrated the new year, the country's whole idea of how to do out with the old and in with the new. He liked it, though. It had that sense of purpose - of order - to it that just couldn't be replicated in any other way.
He paused, considering fondly just what it must have been like that day for those he knew, lamenting faintly over the fact that he hadn't been there to witness as they went about clearing things from rooms and scrubbing down floors and walls. He'd enjoyed it the last time he had seen it, of course, although he wasn't entirely certain of just why he had. It was just, he supposed, one of those things. Shaking his head, he started to walk again, glancing at the passersby at intervals.
Where do I even begin? he wondered. There was, of course, the obvious choice of the Kame Game Shop, although he wasn't certain of if he would find anyone there at this hour any longer. After all, it was just past eleven o'clock, and there was that tradition of finding one's way to the temples for the start of the year. Still, it was better than any other idea he might have had.
Burrowing his hands - nearly frozen now from the cold that he knew he logically shouldn't have been unable to feel - into the pockets of the ivory, knee-length wool coat that he wore, he dropped his head down, doing his level best to avoid any gazes as he walked determinedly towards the game shop. Towards home. He smiled to himself at the thought, feeling his feet move faster almost of their own accord along the pavement. A quick step to the left to stay out of the way of a couple of children running to catch up to their parents, who were scarcely three steps ahead of them. Not that it was really necessary for him to step aside in the first place. But that was, after all, what came with the territory.
Out with the old, he considered, pausing again in his steps, even as minutes ticked by faster than he would have liked, and his time was so short to begin with. Just what old would he do away with? And would he ever accept it back?
But questions, like most things, did nothing; the answers were what was important.
- - -
There were few things that Yuugi couldn't get himself comfortable in. Leather pants, collars ... practically a second skin to him, as much as it had raised eyebrows when people had learned of that, and as much as he had been self-conscious about them at first. And it said something that he could relax, even lounge, in something so largely constrictive as leather. Of course, that made it even more bizarre that one of those few things that he was completely uncomfortable in was the kimono that his grandfather insisted he wear every single New Years Eve. That in itself was more amusing than it should have been, of course. His grandfather, who could not be any more unconventional than he was, insisted on ringing in the new year in as traditional way as possible. Which, of course, meant a visit to the temple stemming from either shortly before midnight or even more shortly after; the visit would be repeated in the morning.
Not that Yuugi particularly minded. Or, rather, he usually didn't mind in the slightest. But, this year, just this once, he wasn't very certain of if he wanted to let go of, well, anything.
Last year had been perfect. He was able to look forward to spending time with his friends, and he'd had his other there with him. Right beside him. Sure, he'd been laughing the whole day about their traditions, but he'd been there, and that was what mattered. But now, just one year later, he was gone. In one year, everything had changed so drastically, and now he was down to the final hour of the year that he'd lost it all. His other wasn't coming back, and there was nothing that he could do about it. He knew that.
So, maybe it was better. Maybe doing out with the old would be a good thing, even though he wanted to just hold on and try to stop time until he managed to find some way to reverse it. He couldn't reverse it, he knew that. There simply was no way. So he'd sat with his mother and his grandfather to have toshikoshi as the last hour of the year began, listening only faintly as his mother told him about his father calling earlier that day to wish them health and happiness in the new year and tell them that he was sorry he couldn't manage to get home for the holiday. Not that he'd been home for New Years anytime recently; Yuugi's last recollection of the man being there for the day was when he was eleven. Not that it was his fault. His job just didn't afford for all that much family time.
He shifted uncomfortably for a moment, tugging at the left sleeve of his kimono before settling down again. His attention drifted to the television, where Kōhaku was still ongoing, and he shook his head at the costume of the latest singer to perform. It wasn't that the whole thing didn't amuse him; it amused him greatly, in fact. It was simply that so many of the costumes - especially this year - seemed far too overdone. It was strange that he thought that, though; really, they weren't that different from what any of the performers would usually wear, and he'd never once considered any of it overdone before. It was clearly a sign of his frame of mind that night.
But, even so, everything began to tick down, and he shivered, excusing himself and making his way to the next room. He was melancholy, and he didn't know how to deal with it. He had no idea how to put a stop to it at all. Sighing softly, he walked to the window and just stared outside. His neighbors' children were running around outside, excited in much the same way that he had been at their age on this night. Their parents were just coming outside to walk with them; Yuugi couldn't help but smile at the sight.
Do you remember, other me? It snowed last year for New Years Eve; it was the first time you had seen it, and you were so amazed by the sight. You were just as excited as those kids are tonight. It was ... cute. It had been the first time that Yuugi had ever been able to actually associate the term with the spirit, as he stared in wonder at the flakes falling from the sky, asking question after curious question about just what they were and where they had come from. It had been the first time that he'd found something that he both didn't know and couldn't immediately understand.
I miss you. Yuugi frowned, placing one hand against the glass and leaning closer to it, forehead resting against the cool surface; normally, he would have jumped back immediately, but, right then, it felt just right. It was real, the first real thing he'd truly felt the entire, surreal night. I miss you, he thought again, closing his eyes. He sighed, breath fogging up the window slightly. But I can't do this anymore. I can't keep thinking about you, and I can't keep holding on. You've gone, and you're where you need to be. I'm sorry, other me. I'm so sorry. I have to let you go, for both of us.
- - -
He hadn't realized just how far he was from the Kame Game Shop and how long he had been walking until he passed by a clock and had the presence of mind to actually look up to see what time it was. Somehow, he realized, forty-five minutes had passed by without his notice, and now he was stuck with only fifteen minutes left to find the one person that he needed to in order to set things right. His last chance - his one chance - and he was apparently going to waste it.
Shaking his head, he quickened his pace. There was only so much that he could do to get there, but the streets had started to turn more familiar and he knew this place almost as though it were his very own hand.
He broke into a jog, head turning left and then right to check that he was clear to cross the street, but on this night, he really shouldn't have had to; not many people in Domino City were driving that night, and it wouldn't have mattered even if they were. A quick look into a window could tell him that.
Window.
He stopped dead, staring ahead of himself as he was suddenly face-to-face with a very familiar sight, and he smiled gently at it. A jade building, fairly oddly shaped and standing out from all of its neighbors; it was the place that he had called home for a year and a half. He walked around it slowly, moving towards the side, eyes never leaving its walls, gaze flicking to the windows as he came to them, hoping to find some kind of sign. His heart leapt into this throat with each glance, thumping heavily. His fears were starting to become realized as window after window yielded dark rooms. He had gotten there too late.
Partner ... Stepping forward, he placed one hand on the rough, outer wall, shaking his head before retracting his hand and wrapping his arms around his body, almost as though to ward off the bitter cold that had overtaken the city. I didn't mean to miss you, or for it to be like this.
Shaking his head again, his eyes narrowed as he looked around. It couldn't have been that far past eleven forty-five, though, and that meant that Yuugi and his family couldn't possibly have left that long ago. He still had time; he still had a chance to find him.
Like a shot from a gun, he took off, feet hitting the ground with an almost angry-sounding, yet light, thump as he raced through the street, making his way to the temple that he remembered having visited just one year earlier with Yuugi. It was the only place that he could think of, the only place that the boy could possibly be headed to. He didn't have time for doubts. He had to get there, and get there fast. A quick jump left to avoid another family, a duck under the hanging sign of a nearby shop; everything and anything, it seemed, was working against him, forming some kind of barricade for him to get through in order to reach his destination. But even that would not deter him as he continued to race forward. Even as he ran, he looked, hoping to find him. Hoping to find the one person who he needed to see again so achingly with every last portion of his being.
Please be waiting for me. It was a naïve wish, he knew, but he couldn't help but wish it all the same. Yuugi was somewhere out there, and all he had to do was find out just where that somewhere happened to be. But hadn't that been his exact purpose from the moment he'd woken up?
Time ticked past, and if he'd looked at a clock, he would have seen that it was almost over. Eleven fifty-nine had come, and all he had was one minute. Just that one, final minute. If he didn't find Yuugi by the time it had passed, it was over.
He might have given up if he'd known that. Even with as confident as he was, even with the fact that giving up had not once before been part of his personality, he might have given up if he knew that his chance was running so short. Around him, people were bustling with excitement as the seconds ticked away, young ladies practically bouncing with each step and children giggling with their innocent joy. Oblivious to the despair that he felt, to that rushing need that coursed through his body, and to the way he had begun to fade further still. They couldn't know; they had never been able to see him to begin with.
But, then, there it was; a familiar shock of hair in the crowd, standing out from all of the rest as only one other person's could, barely centimeters away.
Thirty seconds remained.
"Partner!" The word ripped out of him desperately, and it seemed to have no effect until the other boy turned, blinking but seeing nothing. Still, he was not deterred as he grabbed onto his arms. Yuugi gasped at the contact, but still saw nothing. "Partner, I ..." But he saw it then, with his hands on Yuugi's biceps; he saw how he had begun to fade.
Ten seconds.
He couldn't bring himself to talk, and in that silence, Yuugi shook himself from what anyone else might have called a daze and started to step back, ready to turn around and continue on his way.
He wasn't sure just what possessed him to move. He would never be able to explain what it was that even made him do what he did right then. All that he knew was that he did it, and there was no way to take it back.
At the very last moment that he possibly could, the final second of the final minute, he pushed forward and pressed his lips to Yuugi's, arms immediately wrapping around the smaller boy as he pulled him as close as possible, and time froze. It wasn't one of those moments that just seemed like everything was going slower, and it wasn't anything like in the movies; just as the new year was about to begin, everything just simply stopped.
What he knew should have been minutes turned out to be no time at all as he pulled back. Yuugi was there, wrapped up in his arms, but not moving; the people around them were similarly petrified, mid-step, mid-word, mid-turn. Fear set in; it was over, and all in vain. He'd managed to do the one thing that he had even gone there for, but had been unsuccessful; he was leaving again, and he had no choice. There was simply no way around it anymore. He wanted to scream at the heavens, to demand for another chance, but what could he possibly do to deserve one? He'd been given his chance and he'd failed. That was that.
And, yet, it wasn't. Even as he was in the midst of his misery, behind him there was that gentle hum of conversation that he didn't recognize for what it was at first. A bell sounded in the distance, coming from the temple as the first of their one hundred eight tolls to cast out the earthly passions and begin the year fresh. Around him, people had begun to continue on their way: to temples, to home, to see their friends. And, in his arms, Yuugi stirred, blinking once, twice, before staring in shock.
"O-Other ... no ... A-Atemu ...?" he whispered in disbelief, trying to pull back as he shook himself. But the arms around him tightened, and he was pulled closer.
"I'm sorry," he whispered into Yuugi's ear, closing his eyes and catching his breath finally. "I'm sorry," he whispered again. "I could not stay away from you, partner."
- - -
Atemu had walked with them to the temple after that. No one seemed to even question the fact that he just happened to appear out of nowhere, although he wasn't sure just why. He'd expected, at least, for Yuugi's mother to bring it up and be suspicious, but nothing was said. Instead, he'd just simply taken Yuugi's hand in his own, smiling at the other boy as they walked. Yuugi, for his part, had remained silent the entire way.
It was nearly one o'clock before either of them said a word, in fact, and it was Yuugi who broke the silence just after the latest toll of the bell had begun to die down. The low reverberations from its ring gave Yuugi's words a gentle lull.
"How did you get here?" he asked simply; his other squeezed his hand once before glancing at him, but his gaze quickly returned to the stars as a small smile tilted his lips.
He didn't answer for a short time; another toll of the bell, and he waited for the sound to dissipate enough to be heard over easily. When he spoke, his voice was barely above a whisper as he answered even more simply, "I walked." Yuugi laughed softly at that, leaning against his side companionably as his eyes closed, and Atemu shook his head. "But, beyond that, I am unsure. All I know is that I wanted to see you again, and I was given the chance." He felt the smaller boy's nod against his shoulder and smiled again, resting his cheek against the other's hair. They remained in silence again for the next sounding of the bell, both with their eyes closed; the sound had almost completely died away before Atemu spoke again. "This is nicer than I remembered. Gentler, I guess. I like that."
"Yeah ..."
The bell rang out again.
"Out with the old ..." Atemu offered up, squeezing Yuugi's hand lightly.
A soft chuckle at that as his partner pushed up against him. "Well, not all of the old." His other laughed at that, and he smiled. "But, yes. In with the new."
Atemu frowned after a few minutes of complete silence before realizing just why there was no sound forthcoming: the final toll of the bell had already rung. He nudged Yuugi gently, barely suppressing a laugh as the boy backed away, startled out of his reverie and blinking to clear his head before smiling brightly. Tilting his head back slightly, Atemu smiled as well, not once releasing his hold on Yuugi's hand. Their eyes met for an instant before both looked away almost shyly.
And then they began the trek back home, conducted once again in complete, but not uncomfortable, silence as they followed behind Yuugi's mother and Sugoroku. It was a relaxing walk, not unlike the rest of the night had been since midnight had come, and Atemu was glad for that after his earlier panic. He glanced at Yuugi once or twice as they walked, but never once thought to say a word. It was almost as though speaking would break some sort of spell that had weaved around them with every passing moment and every step that they took.
Walking into the house, they both stopped short at the same time, looking at each other and laughing softly; neither adult stopped to look at the two of them, but instead continued to head to their bedrooms. Something unspoken seemed to dictate that the two simply needed some time to themselves.
"I almost gave up on you," Yuugi admitted after a few minutes of continued silence, eyes downcast. Atemu stepped forward and simply hugged him.
"I wouldn't have blamed you," he said softly. "But I would always have come back." Then silence again. Not because there was nothing to say, but simply because nothing else needed to be said.
