Chapter 1
Name it Nipples
There's a little mountain town called South Park. You can find it sitting happily with many friendly mountain folk, especially for the four the little boys living in this family oriented little town. A lot of crazy things happens here in South Park, but the citizens always find a way to be happy through it. I guess that's one of the best things about South Park. In this story, I'd like to sway a bit from the little boy's lives for a while, and talk about four little girls who had just moved to South Park not very long ago. These little girls are cute, funny, and sweet. They are the role models for typical little girls. Charlie, Chile Dog, Matty, and Nola. They all have a story to tell. Here is one of their best, about a world dangling on the edge of imagination and reality. This is a story about a great firebreathing dragon, a gallant griffon, a monkey with oodles of swagger, the coolest unicron a person could want, and a wild dream.
An orange butterfly floated gracefully across the sky. It glided over the snow covered ground, the grass not covered by snow was shiny with dew. The air smelled sweetly of the aroma you observe that follows a storm. The sun happily pushed through the clouds as the day opened, a new chapter to the story of the world. Something malevolent stepped forward blocking the sun. His bald head glistened, thefew sprigs of hair that stood up looking like freshly shaved pubic hair loomed over his scalp. "A new day, a new day," the man repeated. "A new day to find that girl, that girl who will foil my plans, and her little friends!" The man began to wring his hands, he then shook them up in the air, "I! Dick Penor, will be the end of you all, Chile Dog!" His laughter echoed into the dawn.
Matty pulled the brush through her hair one last time, carefully she fixed the streaks of blue to lay nicely with her natural brown hair. Once everything checked out alright, Matty situated her large DJ style headphones onto her head. She plugged them into her iPod and turned up loudly Super Freak by Rick James. She spun around twirling the bathroom rug around her socks, did a little finger gun at her reflection in the mirror and clucked her tongue. "And we're off," Matty said proudly as she hopped out of the bathroom. As unbelievable as it seems, this was a normal day, for Matty of course. Matty ran happily to the kitchen, to pick up some brain food. Charlie sat at the wooden table in the dining room, reading the newspaper with squinted eyes. Matty loved Charlie and all, but sometimes she was too nerdy to bear. Matty giggled softly as she took her seat at the table. A plate of hot pancakes was sitting on the table, Matty held back drool. She picked up one, then two, then three, and after she finished three, why not four? "These are delicious," Matty exclaimed.
"Dad made them," Charlie said, setting the paper down for a moment. Matty then realized that Charlie was reading comics, not current events. Names like, The Foxtrots, Garfield, and Beatle Bailey lined the page. Charlie looked pointedly at Matty, she picked up her bookbag and smiled. "C'mon, slowpoke! I thought with your doddling we would never make it to school!" Matty couldn't help but laugh with her. What a great day today was turning out to be.
At the school Chile Dog and Nola were making chimp noises loudly, scaring many of the other fourth graders away. Matty and Charlie decided to walk to school that day, it was of course so beautiful and fresh outside. Why not? Walking up to Chile Dog and Nola, they both pondered whether or not they should be seen with them at this point. Chile Dog and Nola were their friends. Why not? Matty and Charlie walked up to them and began to make chimp noises as well. Charlie didn't last too long though, she was blushing bright red, but laughing hard. "Okay! Guys! We have to get to class," Charlie managed to laugh out. The girls giggled as they pushed open the doors, the halls were vacant. "Hello," Nola yelled out. "Hello! You guys sure move quick!" they made their way to their individual lockers and started emptying their school bags. A swoosh came from the front doors, they all turned and looked. The two big doors were wide open, not held by anything. It was strange. "Is. . . is anyone there," Matty squeaked out. Only silence follwed. Matty closed her eyes tightly, and when she flung them open again, the doors were closed. "Whoa, that was pretty weird, right guys," Matty smiled as she turned back to her locker. "Hm," Charlie turned and faced Matty. "What are you talking about?" Matty looked at Charlie, her jaw dropping to the floor, "The doors! You know. . ." she stopped, this was obviously just her overactive imagination. Chile Dog had been fairly silent since they went in the school building. Matty looked over to her locker, she was gone. Chile Dog's locker was wide open, her buns-which served a double duty, they were also her back pack-were laid by her locker. Matty tensed up a little, "D-does anyone know where Chile went?" Nola turned, looked at Chile Dog's locker, and then at Matty, "She went to make a tinkle or something," Nola stated. Oh! Of course, Matty's stupid fear's were just getting the better of her. What? Chile Dog got carried off by some freaky child molester guy, then Nola, then Matty and Charlie would come up with a plan to get them back, and lose Charlie in the progress. No! Now that's just stupid! Matty hummed the tune to Get Out Alive. That tune was very appropriate. It got eerily silent. Matty turned around to see a tall gross looking bald man looming with his pointy nose over her. "Wooooooooooooooooooooow!" Nola trumpeted. "You have one big nose, mister!" The man smirked at Nola, "You four are going to ruin me, I obviously have to take care of you no-" Charlie stood in front of the man and kneed him in the. . . well you know. . . gonads, yelling "PEDOPHILE!" The man just laughed loudly, "Ha ha ha! You think you can hurt me? What a joke!" Nola grabbed onto his nose and pulled hard on it, Matty thought she might rip it off. He yanked his nose away, it was obvious he was going to start a speech, "I am Dick Penor! The greatest villian in the history of villians-"
"No, I think that's the Joker," Matty pointed out.
"What are you, stupid? The most evil villian is the Terminator!" Nola persisted.
"You two can be so stupid," Charlie shook her head. "The most evil villian is Satan, obviously."
"Enough!" Dick Penor silenced them. "You do not have the slightest dream of hurting me! You have no idea what my only weakness is, so therefore your atempts are futile! . . . " Dick pondered for a moment, "Hm, futile. . . fewtile! . . . .fu tile! . . . few tile! . . . footile. . . " Dick was trying to figure out the most evil way to pronounce this word, "Wow, what a tool" Matty muttered to Charlie, the two girls snickered.
"Anyway! You're atempts are futile, children! I'll give you time to unleash the prophecy and then your skin will make great car seat covers, I'm kinda wanting to start my own business. Y'know making kids into the softest seat covers."
"But I thought you were evil," Charlie cockedan eyebrow.
Dick played with his cufflink, "Yeah well, that's the family business and my dad kinda wants me to do that, so I don't wanna let him down. I love to sew and stuff, so I combined evil and sewing. We're both happy!"
Matty and Charlie looked at eachother with perplexed expressions.
"Have your fun now girls! But remember I'll come again, I will rise greater than your biggest imagination," his witty response was spine tingling.
"I will rise bigger than your imagination," Charlie repeated. "What do you think that meant?"
They looked at eachother for a moment, "He just thinks that he's high and mighty," Matty said brushing it off. "That's all."
Chile Dog came walking out of the bathroom, flapping her wet hands, "Hey guys, what'd I miss?"
"Dick Penor," came from the three girls mouths.
Chile Dog look shook her head, "Who's a what now?"
"Dick Penor, the greatest villian of all time," Nola said wide eyed.
"Guys stop waisting my time," by this time Chile Dog was rubbing her butt on the wall. "Sorry, I have an itch." Charlie stuck out her tongue and pointed her index finger in her mouth. "There was no papertowels, so my hands are wet," Chile Dog walked up to Nola and started rubbing her wet hands on Nola's face.
"Oh, that feels so good," Nola said, her voice wavering slightly
"I know! Your face feels so awesome on my hands," Chile Dog said in the same tone
"This is so delicious for my face,"
"Oooh, we should do this more often," the two girls kept making "ooooh" and "ahhhh" sounds as Chile Dog rubber her hands on Nola's face.
Charlie and Matty looked at eachother in disgust, "We need some new friends,"
Matty said disgust dripping from her voice.
"I conquer," Charlie looked at Matty and nodded.
The tension of their weird friends wore off for a second, at least they got rid of the creepy Mr. Penor. But like he said, he'd be back. For a second though they were happy enough, they bumped fists, and let their fingers flow out like tentacles. "Jellyfish!"
