Family Guy Presents:
'Oldest And Newest'
Well, here it is –Seth MacFarlane's cartoon shows retelling of the Return of the Jedi, Return of the King or the Bourne Ultimatum of the Toy Story trilogy: Toy Story 3.
Note: I own nothing. Family Guy, American Dad! and The Cleveland Show all belong to the cartoon god Seth MacFarlane and Toy Story belongs to the Gods of CGI movies: Pixar!
Cast List
Toys
Glenn Quagmire as Woody
Cleveland Brown as Buzz Lightyear
Donna Tubbs (from The Cleveland Show) as Jessie
Rallo Tubbs (from The Cleveland Show) as Bullseye
Carter Pewterschmidt as Lotso
Peter Griffin as Mr. Potato Head
Lois Griffin as Mrs. Potato Head
Chris Griffin as Rex
Brian Griffin as Slinky Dog
Carl as Hamm
Jeremy as Aliens
Stan Smith (from American Dad!) as Sarge
Steve Smith (from American Dad!) as Ken
Snot (from American Dad!) as Twitch
Barry (from American Dad!) as Chunk
Toshi (from American Dad!) as Sparks
Stewie Griffin as Big Baby
Roberta Tubbs (from The Cleveland Show) as Stretch
RJ - as the Chatter Telephone
Gus (from The Cleveland Show) as the Bookworm
The Evil Monkey as the Cymbal-banging monkey
Herbert the Pervert as Chuckles
Roger the Alien (from American Dad!) as Mr. Pricklepants
Dr. Hartman as Buttercup
Babs Pewterschmidt as Trixie
Angela as Dolly
Sanders, Jackson and Dick as the Peas-in-a-pod
Cleveland Brown Jr. as Totoro
Humans and Animals
Johnny Collins (from American Dad!) as Andy
Olivia as Molly
Lisa Collins (from American Dad!) as Andy's Mom
Jeff Fischer (from American Dad!) as Buster
Susie Swanson as Bonnie
Bonnie Swanson as Bonnie's mom
"My fellow citizens," greeted Mayor Adam West. He was in front of a lot of people at Quahog Docks. "Thank you all for coming to Quahog Docks. You're in luck. You are the very first passengers for the maiden voyage of my new cruise line, Adam West Cruises."
The people looked at the cruise behind him. They looked impressed.
"Wow, it's so massive!" cried Cleveland Brown Jr.
"And beautifully clean," added Lois Griffin.
"And it has West's head on it," moaned Brian Griffin. He was right. It did have West's head on the bow.
"Well, if you're all impressed with the look of the boat," said West, "then you'll all love the destinations we're going to."
"A Justin Bieber concert?" cried Roberta Tubbs excitedly.
"A Lindsay Lohan concert?" cried Steve Smith.
"A non-polluted place for endangered animals?" muttered Hayley Smith.
"A museum of beer!" yelled Peter Griffin, Cleveland Brown, Joe Swanson and Quagmire.
"A place where I can make some friends," said Meg.
Every passenger looked at her and laughed.
"Yes, well," West said. "Anyway, I'm sure we'll all have a good time. I know I will. I'm going to be in my captain's cabin the whole voyage. So, please, don't disturb me!"
And, with that, he boarded the cruise.
"It's been two hours have passed since we left the docks," moaned Lois, as she lied on a sun deck, "and I'm bored as hell. Seriously, I bet hell is more exciting than this.
"Yeah," agreed Bonnie, who was sitting on the sun deck next her. "I'm having more fun changing Suzie's diapers."
And I'm having more fun watching people going to the bathroom, thought Suzie. It's not as gross as I thought it was.
Meanwhile, CIA agent Stan Smith had his gun out and was pointing it around the place.
"Stan!" cried Francine, his wife. "Why are you waving your gun?"
"Because I'm so bored, Francine," replied Stan. "And this is the only thing I can think to keep me entertained."
At the bar, Peter, Quagmire, Cleveland and Joe were spitting out beer on the floor.
"Oh, God!" cried Quagmire. "This beer tastes more like sewage water!"
"And we tried every beer on the cruise," added Cleveland.
"What? No beer?" screamed Joe. "I can't stand it! I've got to get off this damn cruise!" He wheeled himself to the edge of the cruise and, hitting the railing, he fell out of his chair and into the sea.
"I'd like to see how this can get any worse," said Peter.
Then the cruise stopped and the power went off.
"Oh, well done, Peter," said Quagmire. "Now everything is much worse!"
Everyone was going even crazier and actually fighting each other. Stan, Stewie and everyone who had a gun were actaully firing them.
"Attention, everyone!"
Everyone turned to see Peter under the giant screen. He put his microphone away.
"I have a great story to tell until... something happens," he said.
"It's Toy Story 3, isn't it?" said Meg.
"Oh, no," cried Donna Tubbs. "Not the sad one."
"I couldn't be bear to watch it again," sobbed Steve. "I found Adam Sandler's Jack and Jill more relaxing."
"That movie put me in the psychiatric hospital," sobbed Holt.
"Thanks for giving the details away, Meg!" snapped Peter. "Now this is a story about loss, depression, moving on and near-death-experiences... Here is Toy Story 3."
