Some days, Yuuri would look at his husband and wonder how on Earth he managed to trick this man into marrying him.

Where Yuuri was fumbling, awkward, chubby, and, frankly a wreck of a human being, Viktor was absolutely gorgeous, graceful both on and off the ice, could charm just about anyone with one of his smiles, and to all who observed him he seemed completely put together.

Well.

All Yuuri had to say to the latter was that some days he honestly had to sit down and weigh out the pros and cons of letting him live.

Viktor snored.

And it was definitely not graceful or charming.

It sounded like a dying buffalo.

Scratch that,Yuuri thought as Viktor let out yet another death-wail, it sounds like the screams of a thousand damned souls.

See, Yuuri liked his sleep. It was one of the things he lived for. And yet Viktor seemed to make it his sole-purpose in life to take that away from him.

Viktor grunted and rolled over in his sleep, kneeing Yuuri in the solar plexus.

Yuuri winced in pain and shoved his husband back to his own side of the bed. He grimaced at Viktor's face and whispered, "I'm going to murder you."

All Viktor did was let out another snore and start to drool on the pillow.

He sighed and grabbed his pillow and another blanket and went to sleep in the guest room.

Yuuri woke up to Viktor's frowning face standing over him.

"Morning," he murmured.

"Morning, solnyshko," Viktor said with a half-smile, "I made you coffee."

Yuuri groggily sat up and took the cup, gratefully taking a sip. "Thanks, Vitya."

Viktor nodded and sat on the edge of the bed, biting his lip.

Yuuri frowned, "Something wrong?"

The other man squirmed, "No…well,yes…"

"What is it?"

"Well…" Viktor looked at him. "Why're you in the guest room?"

"Ah…" It was Yuuri's turn to hesitate, "Oh, no reason…" he trailed off at seeing his husband's frown deepen and sighed. "I don't know how to say this delicately…Viktor, has anyone ever told you that you snore?"

Viktor's eyebrows shot up to his hairline. "I most certainly do not snore!" he huffed indignantly. "And even if I did, it definitely wouldn't warrant your moving to another room – I'd sound like and angel!"

Yuuri rolled his eyes at his husband, "Well, I hate to be the one to break this to you, but my parents can hear you snoring from all the way back in Japan."

Viktor let out a horrified shriek,"Yuuuuri, how could you say that?! Take it back!"

"Can't take back the truth, love."

"Well, I don't believe you," Viktor declared. He proceeded to march out of the room indignantly.

Yuuri chuckled and shook his head, going back to his coffee.

Sure enough, when Yuuri found Viktor on his phone later, Viktor was looking at search results for 'Cures for snoring'.

Yes, Yuuri definitely couldn't believe he had married this man.