Of Spiders, Flies, and Leaders of Men
"Why do you follow him?" Ishida Uuryu asked. The air was cool against his skin. Summer was fading to fall. Shadows lengthened as the sun dropped closer to touch the treetops. It wouldn't be light for much longer, and tomorrow would be even shorter. The world was falling into the darkness known as winter with each passing day.
Orihime Inoue shrugged and smiled at him from over her shoulder. She walked a few steps ahead, swinging her bag back and forth as she walked. "Because he would do the same for me."
But it wouldn't be the same, Ishida wanted to say. If there ever came a moment in time when Orihime needed help, she wouldn't be the one leading the campaign towards her own battle. Orihime would again be following, not leading. But he didn't say it. Orihime had too much faith in her words for Ishida to speak his thoughts. He didn't want to hurt this kind, beautiful girl that had willingly traveled through soul society on that faith alone. Her devotion left him speechless.
Ishida believed that, in life, you were either a predator or a predator's prey. It was a simple concept of hunting or being hunted. He often categorized people into groups of spiders and flies. Ishida was a spider, a predator waiting patiently for a fly to trap itself in his web. As a Quincy and a protector of the blind population, his flies were the hollows that consumed souls, and sometimes the hated shinigami. He didn't go out and look for them as another might. No, he was a spider that sat and waited and planned. He learned early on that being a spider was often lonely, but it was necessary for success, necessary for his focus.
A few months before, he had grouped Orihime in with the flies: a girl too sweet to be deadly. That was before her resolved had been tempered to steel, before her devotion had been reinforced.
"Oh."
Orihime's soft exclamation caught his attention. Looking up, he realized she had stopped a few steps back. Her gaze was to the river, lips slightly parted, brows drawn down in concern. The breeze pushed her hair from her face. The bag no longer swung merrily by her side, but hung from her hand, drooping toward the ground.
For a moment, he could only stare. She was beautiful.
"Kurosaki-kun," she whispered.
Ishida felt his heart deflate. That look would never be for him. He did not have people follow him into battle. No one was devoted to him. He was a spider, alone in his web.
Following Orihime's gaze, Ishida allowed his eyes to settle on the figure of Kurosaki Ichigo where he stood beside the river, bag thrown over his shoulder.
"What's he doing?" Ishida asked as he watched Kurosaki. The boy wasn't moving, just staring out at the river as if the water held the answer to life.
Orihime turned back to Ishida. "I don't know," she said with a fake smile. She was lying. Something was wrong, but she wasn't going to tell him what. "But I think maybe we should leave him alone." Ishida wondered how much that smile hurt her.
"Why should we leave him alone?" he questioned. He kicked himself at the stricken look on the girl's face.
"Um...he looks busy!" Orihime smiled again, and fidgeted. Her eyes went from his, to her toes, to Kurosaki's figure, and back to her toes.
Ishida sighed and gave a slight smile. He resisted the urge to pat her head in comfort. "You're right," he said and watched her face crumple in relief. "Why don't you head on without me. I just remembered that I forgot one of my books at school. I should go get it."
Orihime smiled again, but this time for real, her eyes lighting up. "Okay! I'll see you tomorrow then!"
Ishida watched the girl bounce away around the corner before turning back to the river. Kurosaki hadn't moved, hadn't acknowledged Ishida and Orihime if he had noticed them. Pushing his glasses up with one finger, Ishida began a slow walk to the river's edge.
Kurosaki Ichigo was a predator. Ishida had known that long before he had ever spoken to him. He could tell from the boy's reiatsu. But Kurosaki was different from himself. Kurosaki wasn't a spider who sat in wait. He was reckless, letting his emotions rule his decisions. He didn't take the time to think, but acted on instinct and somehow managed to win through pure force.
Kurosaki had proven that he had more raw power than Ishida. Ishida believed the should be alone by default because of that power. Yet people tended to gather to Kurosaki like flies to a fire. Ishida couldn't understand how Kurosaki was constantly surrounded by people purely devoted to him.
What bothered him even more was that Kurosaki seemed to be completely oblivious to them. He didn't notice the way Orihime smiled at him as if he were the world. He didn't notice how Chad's reiatsu would change when something was noticeably wrong with him. He didn't seem to notice that he had people who would give their lives for him. More often than not, he seemed to brush his friends off, create a barrier between them and him. It made Ishida want to smack him, shake him, show him what he had. But, Ishida deduced, Kurosaki lived as he fought: reckless and unthinking. No, Kurosaki Ichigo was not a spider waiting in his web. He was another form of predator, one that thought it was alone when it was really in a pack.
Ishida stopped beside Kurosaki and looked out at the water, glancing at the setting sun. He could hear the delighted shrieks from children playing in the nearby park and wondered if he had ever been that way. His entire life he had been focused on becoming a Quincy like his grandfather, serious to the point of being boring. And now he was a Quincy, a spider, who protected the happy children, the buzzing little flies from the hollows, the other spiders that would eat them.
And here he stood beside a new type of predator, not to annihilate him, but to find out what was wrong. Ishida was sure that his logic had become twisted somewhere along the line. He blamed Orihime for smiling at him so freely every day, making his stomach knot and tangle. He would help Kurosaki if it meant Orihime kept smiling.
"Are you looking for the meaning of life, Kurosaki?" Ishida asked, crossing his arms.
Kurosaki shrugged, the first sign that he knew Ishida was there. "No, just thinking," he said and turned to face Ishida.
Ishida thought his smile looked as fake as Orihime's had. "Right."
"So, what's up?" Kurosaki asked, scratching the back of his head. Ishida was sure that Kurosaki had once been one of those children who screamed in delight at the park. He had always been surrounded by people, had been given the chance to smile and laugh and cry freely. He hadn't always been a predator, he hadn't been born a shinigami as Ishida had been born a Quincy.
Ishida still hadn't decided if Kurosaki was just lucky or truly powerful. If it were luck, then it was only a matter of time before it ran out. Sooner or later, Kurosaki would lose a battle to someone with strength and cunning, and more than likely lose his life. And once Kurosaki was finished, the ones who followed him into battle would fall soon after. For there was no doubt that there would be someone who followed Kurosaki into battle, even if it were only Chad and Orihime. Ishida half wanted to be there to pick up the pieces to prove he was the better predator, prove himself better than a shinigami. The other half of Ishida didn't want to see Kurosaki lose, couldn't bear the thought of a defeated Chad or a broken Orihime.
"You're worrying Orihime," Ishida said, still facing the river.
Kurosaki looked around in surprise. "What? Why? Is she here?"
"No. She went home." Ishida shook his head. "She seemed worried when she saw you staring at the river."
"Tch, dummy." Kurosaki grunted, turning to face the water again.
He wanted Kurosaki to be truly that powerful. He wanted to believe that someone with so much power could have friends and be happy. He wanted to watch and learn what it took to gain Orihime's devotion as well as her smile. He wanted to know what it cost to gain the strong and silent Chad's ever-lasting loyalty. There had to be some secret to not being alone, some trick that Kurosaki had that Ishida was missing. It was a talent that a spider like Ishida didn't know how to gain, but maybe if he stayed near Kurosaki Ichigo then he would learn. And in the meantime, maybe he could be happy where he was while being surrounded by those who followed Kurosaki.
The sun sank below the tree tops on the other side of the glass-like river. A few mothers were calling in their children for dinner. The silence wrapped around them, both absorbing the peace of the end of the day.
Kurosaki squatted in the long grass, wrapping his arms around his knees. "Thanks, Ishida," Kurosaki said.
"What for?" Ishida asked. Looking down, he could only see Kurosaki's wild orange hair as the other boy continued to watch the water.
"For helping me save Rukia, for helping Inoue while in Soul Society," Kurosaki paused for a moment. "I felt better when I learned you were with her. I knew she'd be alright."
Ishida stared. That had sounded too close to a compliment. "And how did you know that?" He asked, letting his arms fall to his sides. His bag thumped against his leg.
Kurosaki stood with a stretch to face him. Brown eyes met blue. "Because I knew that if I couldn't protect her, you would."
"And what if I had failed?" Ishida asked.
"I knew you wouldn't." Kurosaki's gaze was steady, his faith in his words evident. It was the same unshakable faith that Orihime held in Kurosaki, the look Ishida had been sure he would never gain.
Ishida felt thrown off balance. "You do realize that we're still enemies, right? I'm still a Quincy."
"And I'm a shinigami," Kurosaki smiled. Turning away, he waved back to Ishida, "Well, see you tomorrow."
Ishida could do nothing more than watch Kurosaki's retreating back.
Orihime believed that Kurosaki would follow her, and so she followed him. It was a circle of trust and faith. Many people followed the orange haired boy. It bothered him sometimes.
Then again, even Ishida had followed him into Soul Society, and had lost his Quincy powers because of it. But, looking back, he would do it all over again if it meant getting to know the people in his life now. If it meant he could be in awe of Chad's silent strength, that he could listen to the bickering of the crowd around him. If it meant getting to know the beautiful Orihime and have her so casually smile at him from day to day, even if her devotion were to a different predator than himself. If it meant receiving that look of trust and faith from Kurosaki Ichigo, a predator who attracted flies like fire. Ishida was thinking that maybe he was a spider who was attracted to such a light.
