I don't know what to do. He looks at nothing with glowing, dead eyes. I
have to leave, I can't look at him or the doctors anymore. It makes me
nauseous to think they've been poking him with needles and having machines
take measurements of his heart rate and blood pressure. My stomach's in a
knot and I can't stand up straight. He's all alone in his fucked-up mind,
or even worse, with that ugly she-male bastard, Sephiroth. He doesn't know
we're here, doesn't know anyone cares about him, has no idea that a clean-
smelling nurse with a nice, firm rack has been trying to "keep him
comfortable" by pumping him full of painkillers. I swear under my breath
and go outside. The air in Mideel is hot and humid. It smells like sweet
rot. I suck in a cigarette as fast as I can, watch the column of ash grow,
glowing orange ember underneath. Glowing the same sick, unreal color as
that fucking Meteor hanging over our heads in the sky.
Fuck, we've come this far and Cloud's as good as dead. I don't care what Tifa says. Honestly, I don't care much about Tifa either. I like hearing her feelings about Cloud about as much as I like putting a cigarette out on my arm. Which brings me to... why the hell am I doing that? Shit, that hurt.
Tifa's not coming back. She's not coming with us. She wants to stay with Cloud. My Cloud, who doesn't even know I care about him. Two down. Three, actually. Fine. I can deal with that. We go back to the airship. Nobody knows what to do. For once, I think maybe we're not gonna win. Shinra's got a new plan. I'm pretending to be asleep. I don't want to hear about Shinra, I don't want to hear the details of how we're gonna have our goddamn asses handed to us. Barret doesn't want to be the leader. Why do we need a goddamn leader? Barret started goddamn AVALANCHE, he should be the leader. He wants me to be the leader. Why? 'Cause it's my airship.
I open my eyes. Yeah, it is my goddamn airship, and as I get a glimpse of that motherfucking rock, I realize I don't want to share the sky with that. I don't want Shinra to get the Huge Materia. I don't want it to end here. Maybe someday Cloud will realize what a stud I am, and we'll fly the clear blue skies. Besides, if I can't help Cloud, I can help save the world. We're off to Corel, I tell the new pilot whose goddamn name I'll never remember.
Fuck, we've come this far and Cloud's as good as dead. I don't care what Tifa says. Honestly, I don't care much about Tifa either. I like hearing her feelings about Cloud about as much as I like putting a cigarette out on my arm. Which brings me to... why the hell am I doing that? Shit, that hurt.
Tifa's not coming back. She's not coming with us. She wants to stay with Cloud. My Cloud, who doesn't even know I care about him. Two down. Three, actually. Fine. I can deal with that. We go back to the airship. Nobody knows what to do. For once, I think maybe we're not gonna win. Shinra's got a new plan. I'm pretending to be asleep. I don't want to hear about Shinra, I don't want to hear the details of how we're gonna have our goddamn asses handed to us. Barret doesn't want to be the leader. Why do we need a goddamn leader? Barret started goddamn AVALANCHE, he should be the leader. He wants me to be the leader. Why? 'Cause it's my airship.
I open my eyes. Yeah, it is my goddamn airship, and as I get a glimpse of that motherfucking rock, I realize I don't want to share the sky with that. I don't want Shinra to get the Huge Materia. I don't want it to end here. Maybe someday Cloud will realize what a stud I am, and we'll fly the clear blue skies. Besides, if I can't help Cloud, I can help save the world. We're off to Corel, I tell the new pilot whose goddamn name I'll never remember.
