Give me the strength to go

"So, that's it then, you're just going to leave me, like it'd never happened between us"

Emma was hysterical and she knows it. However, it is not easy for her to let go of her soul mate, the love of her life. She hears Regina sigh through the phone, and then says

"You know baby it's not working any more, we tried we've been married for a year, I's not healthy to continue living like this, Emma, please"

She knew this would happen; no one wanted her, ever since she was a baby, and her parents on the side of the road abandoned her. Why she even tried it and fell in love, she does not know

...

"So what do you say? You think you're up for a second date yet?"

Regina looked up and saw sheriff Swan standing at the door smiling goofily at her, she lifted her right eyebrow and said "and what made you believe in such thing Sheriff Swan?"

Emma, used to Regina being vague and mysterious, played along with it.

"oh, I don't know, maybe because of the kiss that we had in front of your door, or the flirtatious looks you kept sending me at Granny's this morning, but either way…" she took a couple of steps toward the Mayor and looked at Regina from beneath her lashes, and continued "I'm not taking no for an answer".

Letting out a huff of laughter, Regina stood and closed the remaining distance between them, grabbing Emma by the collar, she pulled her a little closer and whispered "and what are you going to do to convince me of accepting your offer, Sheriff"

Emma melted right into her; it was such a different sight to witness on Regina's face. Gone with the malevolence and viciousness that Regina has been preserving for her. The first two years she came to Storybrook were hard. They have never saw eye to eye with each other, always fighting over Henry and what had followed from the smallest things, like who would take him to school, and what he eats for breakfast, to the big things, like her knack for running and who she was dating and her job and endless things.

Now, looking at Regina's soft smile and mischievous eyes, she could not believe her luck.

"Well, if you want me to convince you of going on a second date with me, then I might as well kiss you know, cos it will take a long time to do that"

Regina narrowed her eyes at Emma. She knew she was being playful, but she hated being viewed as the aloof and hard-headed woman everyone thinks she is. Even if for some of them, she is reserved she did not like Emma thinking of her that way.

Emma was watching the wheels turning in Regina mind; she gripped her waist a little tighter, and said, "Hey, you know I was joking, right? You know I'd wait for you a thousand years if you ask me to, I told you I'm not letting you go, not after you agreed on the first date, which was the most amazing day in my life"

"Me too, I just, I don't want you to think that me being hard on you means I want you to work for it, I'd love to go on a second date with you. I had such a lovely time with you"

That was all the confirmation Emma needed to join their lips in a tender kiss.

...

"Emma, are you still there?"

She was jolted from her memories by Regina's voice. Is she ready to let go of all of their memories they have shared? Moreover, why? Because they were fighting on and off again, so? Every married couple fight.

It is not just a year or two, but seven that she is expected to forget and move on, how can anyone do that?

"Regina, it's late now. Please just… let's talk about it in the morning, okay? This is not a.. this is not a conversation to have on the phone, tomorrow"

There was another sigh and then "ok, goodnight Emma"

"Goodnight, I love you"

She waited for Regina to answer back, she was chanting in her head, 'please say back, please, say it', after a while she heard

"I love you too"

...

Her morning is turning out to be a shitty one. She woke up late because her alarm was off, and she met Regina at Granny's for her hot chocolate and bearclaw dose, and the burette had not acknowledged her beyond a friendly smile, and went to her business. She arrived at the station reliving last night phone call with Regina and didn't even notice that her father was watching her sulk at her desk.

"is everything ok?" David knew something was up with those two. Emma has been staying with them for a while now, and he hoped they would work it out.

Emma looked up surprised. God, she was really not in the mood for intorregation right now, but she mumbled "yeah, ah.. no actually, I'm… I don't know what to say dad"

Ok, this is serious. Emma never held anything from him. Well, there are somethings that he really doesn't have to know, but that's beside the point.

"what happened Emma? You know you can tell what is bothering you"

"I know Dad" Emma sighed. How is she going to tell him what happen without him reminding her of the fight? The one she had with her parents when they raised some issues about her relationship with Regina.

...

They were all sitting at a booth in Granny's and the air was so tense you can cut it with a knife. 'Jesus, what the hell is going on' Emma thought looking at Regina and Mary Margrate, - her mother- engaging in a staring contest. She really doesn't understand these two, and never will.

"So, Emma, how are you doing back at work?" her mother finally asked.

She knows it has been hard on her parents when she isolated herself after returning from Fairy-tale land, she still has many nightmares from her time there. She was grateful that she has Regina to get her through it, and that's what hurt her mother the most, her turning to Regina instead of her mom. She still feels guilty for not finding a connection with them even though Regina had told her it's not her fault. She grow up alone and always on the run and no one ever cared for her, and to just have parents at 28 whom actually cared about her, it's just a shock to her default setting of running away from any feelings, any caring, because it had always caused her so much pain to open herself up to anyone.

that's what made Regina so unique, she understand her in a way no one has, not even Neil, well, they were young and stupid but she never had that element she had in her relationship with Regina, they just…click, which is so cliché but it's true.

She looked at her mom, assessing her state of mind before saying "It's been great actually, not that many need my help anyway. Besides, David is doing a fine job keeping all the Lost Boy from the street"

She looks at Regina who has't said a single word, and when Regina looks back at her, she makes a little gesture with her head toward her parents. She watches Regna taking a deep breath and looking at Emma, then just blurted out "we're dating"

She watch in amazement as her mother's face gradually became so red that matches her red jacket, waiting for the lash out that was bound to happen.

"WHAT?" Snow alternate staring at her daughter and then at.. at , she can even…"Emma? What does she mean YOU ARE DATING?"

Emma for her part wishes that the ground would just swallow her right this moment. She turns to Regina who shrugs her shoulder as of saying 'not my fault' and then back at snow and says "snow look, I wanted to tell you this because you guys are very important to me and I hated lying to you, but this is my life…."

"She's the EVIL QUEEN for god sake Emma….."

"hey, don't bring my past to this, it's been over thirty years…."

"that you had us under a sleeping curse. Is that not evil enough for you Regina" David cuts her out, then says "you had me married to someone who is not my True Love, and kept Snow Away from me…."

"like that stopped you from cheating on your wife with Snow" Regina exclaimed, feeling her anger rising. How dare they do this now? How dare they bring her past after trying so hard to redeem herself. She saved Emma for god's sake; she absorbed a death curse for her.

"Guys please…" Emma tried but was cut off by Snow "no Emma, she hurt us, she's the reason we didn't get to raise…."

That's was the broken record they used every time, Regina thought "no, don't you DARE blame me for your mistakes Snow. I may have tried to kill you but it wasn't me who put Emma into that Wardrobe, which was all your doing"

"guys.."

"I Will not allow this.."
"see if I care Snow.."

"ENOUGH"

Every one stared at Emma wide-eyed after her enraged roar. She took a deep breath and said "Snow, please, I don't want us to fight. How I feel for Regina is beyond anything I have ever felt. She understand me she knows I'm not perfect…."

"honey you are perfect.."

Emma sighed; closing her eyes, she continued, "I hate to break it to you but…. God I've done a lot of shitty things in the past, I've lied, manipulated, stole from people, whether for fun or not and she gets it. I'm not perfect, will never be, I didn't ask to be the Saviour… I feel like I'm lying to people…I just, I love her mom…" she looked at her mom, her vision clouded with unshed tears, "isn't that enough?"

Snow's heart broke at the vulnerable look her daughter was giving her. She hated this; she wanted Emma with someone who deserve her, not the Evil Queen. She looked at Regina, seeing the lone tear that slid down her cheek while staring at Emma, It could still be a way to get her revenge on Snow by breaking her daughter's heart.

She shook her head, she turned to Emma she Said "she's gonna hurt you" she watched her daughter's face crumble. She ploughed through it, making her point across "She's gonna hurt you, and when that happens, I'll be her for you. I won't pretend to understand what you see in her, but you're my baby and I wil always support you"

She then looked at Regina and with a steely voice said "hurt her Regina and I'll swear to you, nothing will save you from me"

Having never seen this side of Snow, Regina nodded her head a little in understanding. She stood up, adjusting her pencil skirt, she looked at Emma, seeing her like this, she looked so little huddled in the corner of the booth, and she fell in love with her all over again.

This has been the second time Emma said she loves her, and she had yet to say it back. Scared of what that might mean. She had never been loved before, except for Daniel, but it was brief and, not at all like what she feel for Emma. Leopold doesn't count. She shuddered at the thought of him, the way he treated her like some kind of possession. She looked back at Emma, she slid back beside her whispering in her ear

"Emma, look at me"

That voice, Emma thought. She looked at Regina eyes, seeing the love shining bright in them. She understood why haven't she said those three words yet. It was an accident kind of, the way Emma just blurted the word after a night at Reina's, eating and talking. She just couldn't hold them anymore. And it hurt a little not hearing them being said back to her but she accepted the fact that Regina did things on her own terms.

Now, looking at her she was sure her forever is with this woman. Waking up every morning tangled in the bed sheets, relaxed and happy, she can get used to it.

"I love you too"

...

She lifted her head to look at her dad. He was instantly alarmed to see the tears rolling down her face, she said, "Regina wants to get divorced".