I don't see myself as selfish. Selfishness means you want everything you can take regardless of the actions, and regardless of who is affected and how the future is changed. Those people who come to see me…oh sorry…see us…that was one of my familiars correcting me there. Well anyway, those people who come to see us…well, they come here and usually don't understand or get frightened or scared. But I don't want them to be scared; I don't want these people to be scared of me. What did I ever do to them? These people can be happy here, and I really really want them to be; it hurts so much inside when I see people unhappy. Not like I'd ever resort to violence; I could never hurt a fly.
I recall one instance when a woman made her way into my lair. She was certainly pretty; long black hair and fine complexion. She was scared, and I just had so many emotions inside…pain, hurt, curiosity even…but I knew that I had to help her. My familiars wanted to help her as well. Calming her down by talking to her wouldn't do any good; it was like she couldn't understand the way I spoke. We did throw a party for her though and that calmed her down a lot. We provided her with music and dancers and as much delicious tea and cake she could ever want. It was just a case of her simply warming to us…yes that could have been it. And I can see her right now as I say this; she's drinking more tea and enjoying the company of some dancers of mine.
But I recall another time, but it still hurts me to say it. Someone came here to put an end to me. It was like I had no control. And I get did not want to not have control, if that makes sense. I never even laid a finger on her, and neither did my familiars. How she stopped hurting me I cannot actually remember, but she's over there in the corner munching happily on one of my macaroons.
Alright, so perhaps I am selfish after all. But all I've ever wanted in this life is happiness. Myself, my familiars, this beautiful lair, and the wonderful people who come and visit. And it really hurts me when they say they want to leave.
I don't like it when they say they want to go…
