Not the best choice
It was here. The day she was so afraid of. Not that she wouldn't miss him on set. Only god knows how much she missed him, but she was afraid. She always had problems to hide her feelings. She dated many guys and she always started it, but not always she was the one who end it. But this time it wasn't right and she knew it but she though these feelings will pass away but they only grew stronger. Each day which she spent with him, the emotion was bigger and bigger and she was afraid that it will be only more powerful when she is gonna see him again.
She filmed with him almost year ago and it was horrible. He as his character told her character that he loves her and in that moment she believed him. She knew he played it. He knew his character so well and he could play his emotions brilliantly.
People though about her, that even she is that great actress but it wasn't true because she didn't play her feelings. When she suppose to play she is jelaous she was, cuz he filmed more with another actress than with her. When she suppose play that she is in love with him she was cuz he was the most awesome guy she ever met. When she suppose to play she miss him she did because she really missed him. Without him she didn't had reason to look forword to filming.
She loved her job but with him, it was better. She was always so scared of ruining the shot or something so she tried as hard as she could do everything right but he was the opposite. He played marvelousy but when he felt like the others were bored he started dancing or just doing crazy things which made everyone laugh. Even her. That was also the point why she knew it could never work between them. Because she wasn't funny and he wanted someone funny or crazy and she was just her. Not enough good for him. She knew her character didn't feel like that but she couldn't help but she played her like that and she was afraid someone will notice that.
When he had the accident she almost died of fear of him. And it's hard to express how happy she was when she found out he is okay. It was one of the worst things that ever happened. Not only because of the pain but because he couldn't film as much as he though so she wasn't able to see him that much.
Every romantic scene she had to film with him was really painful but days she didn't film with him at all was worst.
And today he was suppose to come back for few days and film few scenes, some of them with her. And she was so afraid. They will kiss and she was worried that she is gonna put too much emotions into it. And someone will notice it.
He had girlfriend, although it wasn't the best between them lately and she didn't want to be that kind of girl, although she really wanted to be his girl.
So here was he. Standing here and hugging everyone and smiling and so handsomly. He looked better than ever. But he look little bit tired although he tried to hide it but she notice it.
And than he looked at her and she felt like she could black out every moment. He came to her and give her hug, only short one but he was smiling all the time. She asked him how he is and they had really short chat before they started filming. In that moment, although it hurts, she felt really happy.
She found out that they are gonna film more than a kiss today and she got so scared. How will she handle it? How will she play it well? How will she forget it?
Before the filming they didn't talk much. They never did. Well not as much as she wish they would. He was talking with other girls and boys and not with her. When they finally should start working together he didn't look bothered that he has to film with her. She expected him to look like that. There must be tons other people he would like to film more with than with her. But he actually looked happy but that maybe made only her mind, he might just look like that, cuz he was glad that he is back.
And they did it. The made it mostly on one shot and it was beautiful. For her of course. He touched her so beautifuly that, she had problem hide how wet she become. She tried to stay calm but it was hard. Luckily everyone though it was great. When they finished the scene, she needed more but he looked so normal. Like it didn't mean anything to him. Well it didn't. That's why it hurts so much.
They finish filming pretty quickly and she wanted to go home and just tried not to think about him. But he ruined her plans. He came to her, all smily face, and asked her if she wants to grab a coffee.
After that he was silence for a bit and than he explained that his girlfriend is not home and others doesn't have time and he doesn't feel like being alone today and also he would love to tell her more about filming one of his movie.
How could she say no? Well she coudln't and she didn't.
They went to one restaurant but when they got there it was almost night so instead of coffee they ordered wine. Which wasn't great choice for sure.
She was able to handle the alcohol well, that's what she though but this night, the wine brings her memories about other night she tried to forget.
They finished first glass of wine when the memory started appearing in her mind.
It was halloween few years ago. She went as her character but only because she forget to buy costume and he went as his charcter because he was amazing at playing it.
This time she wasn't in love with him yet but when she saw him with this dark clothes and make-up she got little wet without expecting it. He was so hot and he was wondering how it's possible she didn't notice that before.
Well if she though about it more, she did. She though he looked awesome when he played it but between scenes he made fun of it so it was hard for her to describe him as sexy. But this night he only played his role and he looked more sexy than everyone she ever saw.
And there it was, they finished first glass. Although she had a memory before her eyes, she was still able to focus on him. They were talking and it felt so right. He talked, she talked, no silence and if so it wasn't embrassing. They (not only her but it seems that also he) were enjoying it so he ordered another glass. Bad choice number two.
The memory continued. They danced. Not together but with other people and sometimes they touch but it was only by mistake. Mistake that she didn't regret. They got tired, sit down and they had few drinks and than they started dancing again but with less people.
She tried to push her memory away but it was hard cuz even tho this night was mistake, she never regret it but he was, she knew it cuz they never spoke about it.
They finished second glass of wine and she felt better. She was less worried what she is saying and she started feel more like herself. He was funny all the time but he didn't look bored and he actually liked like he is really enjoying spending time with her, which made her really happy. He ordered another glass but she couldn't say it was bad choice anymore.
The third glass of wine ended the memory but not the night. They were dancing together. Both quite drunk but both enjoying it. Most of others passed away or didn't know much about the world. They didn't care about the world either. They were touching a lot but they didn't care. His girlfriend wasn't there and neither was her boyfriend and they knew it was bad. Well she think they knew but they didn't care. And they slept together. For her it was start of her feelings, for him it was the end for everything that could be between them. They become friends after that again but it wasn't the same. Mainly because she secretely wanted to do it again and he wanted to forget it, not really secretely.
His eyes had sparks and he was smiling all the time. She didn't even think about sleeping with him cuz the thing they were having now meant more for her. They started another glass of wine and she felt so good. She felt free and herself with him and the wine was really good. They were talking about nothing and everything and they were smiling and it felt like they both feels the same. Something as strong connection.
Well in the end she lost the count of how many glass they drunk but it wasn't little. When they finally decided to leave they had problems go straight. He was trying to helping her with walking but he had problems by himself. They were still laughing, they couldn't stop. They went to her appartment cuz it was closer and he decided to stay here on couch. He said because he was lazy but he probably just couldn't remember where his flat was.
And than she rememembered again how hot he looks that Halloween night . How dark he acted and how bad he was when they slept together. How he didn't ask for permission and she remembered his fingers. His fucking fingers.
He looked like that now. In the dark appartment. She wanted to have him. She needed him.
And alcohol let her kiss him. She just couldn't help herself although she knew it was the right thing to try. Well she didn't. She just grab him and didn't hide she wanted to do that for so long time.
He might fight with her first but he couldn't resist. No matter what she though, he was acttracted to her a lot. So they ended in bed and she wished she could remember more of it but she remembered only flashes.
Him kissing her lips.
Him holding her hips really tightly and bitting the skin at her stomach.
Him holding her thights and licking her. She remembered that was the time she saw only stars. She always imagine his tongue doing the exact moves how she liked it but even tho he couldn't know how she likes it, he has done it way beyond her imagination.
Her sucking him. Little bit of bitting and trying the best she could. Well it worked for him.
Him being in her so hard and so long that it almost hurted. But only almost.
Her waking up in his arms.
When does this happen she was terrfied. She did horrible thing and the worst was she that it made her happy. She always wanted it and she loves him but he didn't loved her and he did it only because he was drunk.
He woke up too and he was just looking at her. She expected him to be terrified and run away but he looked at here differently, with wildness in his eyes.
Let me speak first please – he said and she nodded because honestly she didn't have words by herself.
You didn't cheated and nor I. I broke up with her but we didn't tell it in public yet. I know you did it because you were drunk but I wanted to say that it's not my case. I wanted it. For too long – he added. And she smiled and he looked suprise.
I wanted it too she said and than he kissed her. First on the lips and than everywhere else and than she remembered all that she forgot from last night.
