A short note from the author, Bunny~
Wowza! There's been a lot of coconut stories falling on me lately! It's getting kind of dangerous... *warily puts up umbrella* To look at the bright side of things, I hope these extremely short one-shots are keeping you all happy while "that story" is still being written...and written...and written... *glances nervously* The word count...it's over 5 digits... D:
*Ahem* I dedicate this story to anyone who's ever sweated, toiled, and cried over the journey for a Shiny Pokémon...and then tasted sweet success... ^_^ Congratulations, guys. You earned it.
But with that, I give you my newest story, and the result of my frustrations and emotions for failed Shiny Hunting: I give you Loved for Something Else...
When she looked in my eyes, she told me she loved me. I knew. But I also knew her love for me was different, because I'm a Zorua.
Every day, since the day we met, she's told me she loves me. She says it as she pets my midnight fur, or plays with the ice-blue brush on my head. And she does mean it. She means every word.
You could say it was love at first sight, for both of us. I was born in the bushes on the small route, and watched trainers pass by all the time. But it was only her that I went to, when I saw her. When she saw me, her eyes went wide. I could hear her heartbeat racing. She threw a Quick Ball, and I never resisted.
We walked down the seaside streets of Slateport City, with the salty breeze and the sound of the shops around us. I was disguised as the boy trainer we'd fought earlier that day. We held hands, and it felt good. I never wanted to let go.
But this wasn't real. This was but an illusion, and the metaphor struck me painfully. I wanted to be with her. But I'm a Zorua. Being a human like this, walking together, holding hands…Everything I felt here was fake.
If I looked troubled, you'd ask me what's wrong. And you'd expect an answer. You always yearned for me to one day reply. I hated the silences between us after you ask me a question. And I hate it even more when you tell me you love me.
It hurts to hear something so true and caring, and be unable to respond. In theory, I could. My species can speak through telepathy a little. But I wouldn't be able to speak without saying "I love you, too." I could never do that.
What would you think if you heard that from me? Would you accept it as cute affection? Or if you realized what it really meant, would you push me away? I doubt it'd be the second. Every time you pet my fur, I watch you, and I've studied the glow of happiness in your eyes for so long. That glow is not the same when I'm in disguise. It's only there when you look at my fur, and see how different I am.
I struggle to ask myself: "Would you love me if I was red?" If the ice blue was dull crimson and my black fur faded to coal…if that happened one day, would you love me as much as you loved me before? Was your love caused by my color alone? I'm beginning to think so, in a way. At least, you never would have tried to love me, if I hadn't been what I am. And that love you feel isn't the same as mine.
Again, you ask me what's wrong, and you squeeze my hand this time. I say nothing. I would never have the courage to speak to you. Not when my heart pounds close to exploding and my pale blue paws feel clammy. Not when I know that your radiant smile and affectionate embrace are everything I could have ever asked for.
Not when I love you in a way you would never love me.
For the time being, I only squeeze your hand back, and smile. I have to pretend. That's all I have. But when I walk with you, pretending to be someone else...someone who can look right into your innocent eyes…I wish I could wear my disguise forever. I wish I was human.
Then you smile back, and pet my head. I don't know what to think. You'd never done this before while I was in disguise, and I don't know why you're doing it now. But then I saw the glow of happiness in your eyes. You tell me you love me, and you don't wait for a reply. I feel that warm embrace of yours. The arms of my illusion wrap around you.
The pain of the fakeness fades for a moment. This feeling is what I want. But even as you hug my human disguise, you still pet my head. You never really do forget what I am, do you?
I can't have what I want. I've known that since we met. I've known that it's wrong. But it will never change how I feel about you.
My illusion breaks, and you catch me in your arms. I huddle close to your warm heartbeat, looking up into your eyes. I say nothing, and I never will…but you know what it is I can't bear to say. You hold me closer.
Even though I am me, and you are you… Even though I am loved for something else…
I love you.
And cut!~ That probably wasn't what most of you were expecting, given the dedication and beginning note, but I still stand by my dedication because it's Shiny Hunting that inspired this story. It just goes to show that the journey is the most moving part. Getting there is just the reward.
I hope everyone enjoyed this story, and for those of you who did, please drop a review in the little box down there. For those of you who didn't like it, then review anyways, please! Reviews are my most treasured currency, and I consider every one of them to be precious. Whether it's a review, criticism, flames, or biscuits, I will be honored to accept it.
And speaking of biscuits... *sneaky grin* You all thought I forgot to feed my loyal readers, didn't you? ;) Well, I'm one step ahead of you! But for those of you sick of biscuits (and those of you just now reading my stories, who won't get the joke) I made a tray of soft, flakey croissants! Buttery as always, and steaming hot, right out of the virtual oven! ^_^
Thank you all for reading, and I hope I can continue to serve *bows briefly*
Peace out! Bunny~
