A/N: Okay, call me insane for starting another story when I have one unfinished and another one in the planning stages, but writing fan fiction is addictive! While writing "Making Things Right" and brainstorming the sequel to "Finding Harm" the idea for this story came to mind. The setting is around the time of Lifeline and Adrift. Slightly AU, so some of the dates and events will differ from the show.
Disclaimer: Don't own them, just trying to make right a wrong (getting Harm and Mac together before the end of season 10).
The Water's Cold
Olivia and Juliet's Restaurant
May 25, 2001
2015 Local
Sounds of clinking glasses and words of congratulations filled the private dining room. Everyone was in high spirits following Lt. Roberts's toast. The junior attorney had shown up late to the rehearsal dinner looking like a drowned rat. Despite his appearance—Bud always had the misfortune of having some clothing mishap occur during these types of events—he'd spoken from the heart.
Admiral A. J. Chegwidden nodded. The former Navy SEAL wasn't a sentimental person, but Bud's words touched something within him. At least the part of how he met Harriet. Couldn't agree with the words on Mac's marriage to Mic being a matter of destiny. But he knew Bud was in the position of having to say something appropriate for the occasion.
These people had become like family to him—Lieutenants Roberts and Sims, Tiner, Gunny Galindez, Mac, and her little "sister" Chloe. To a certain degree, even Lt. Singer. He supposed he should include Mic Brumby and Renee Peterson in his feelings—after all one was marrying his chief of staff and the other was his senior attorney's "significant other" or whatever they called themselves these days.
If ever there were two mismatched couples…
But it was hard to think of either of them as being part of the JAG family. Renee was flighty and had no respect for the military. Brumby was—well downright smarmy. Somehow A. J. couldn't trust the former Australian officer.
"Chegwidden." When his cell phone rang, he turned away from the table to answer the call.
"Would the admiral like to add anything?" Bud asked as A. J. made his way back to the table. The lightning and thunder outside were no match for the internal storm he felt at this moment.
He cleared his throat. "I was just patched through to Captain Ingles, the skipper aboard the carrier Patrick Henry. Commander Rabb and his RIO, Lt. Hawkes, got into some trouble on a bingo to Andrews. They're believed to have gone down at sea."
Everyone spoke at the same time.
"Oh, my God."
"What?"
"No!"
Finally, Renee asked the question that was on everyone's mind. "Well, why would they be flying in this weather?"
"Harm was trying to get back in time for the ceremony."
To his dying day, A. J. knew he would never forget the look on Sarah Mackenzie's face when she heard those words.
Flashback
JAG Headquarters
May 7, 2001
0800 Local
"You want to do what?" A. J. hadn't intended to raise his voice to the commander, but the request came as a complete surprise.
Harm stood at attention as he spoke. "The JAG officer on board the Patrick Henry had a family emergency and is on leave for the next three weeks. I'm requesting the assignment, sir."
"Denied. I need you here, Commander. Do I have to remind you Col. Mackenzie will be taking leave in a few weeks? That already puts me down one senior attorney. Besides, a junior officer can handle whatever is needed on the Henry."
"Sir, first of all, the temporary assignment is only for three weeks. I'm also due for my six-month quals, and I'll be able to do them while I'm there. I'll be back after Memorial Day. The Colonel's leave isn't scheduled to begin before then. And right now, we don't have many pending cases. Mattoni, Imes, and Lt. Roberts can handle anything that comes up."
"Maybe so, but this would be a step backward for you. What is it about you doing things that are setbacks to your career? Two years ago, you left to fly, and now this."
"I admit I made a mistake when I left before, Sir. But this is only temporary. I'm not requesting to change my designator."
"It's still a step backward."
"Admiral, Sir, I need this assignment."
"Why?"
"It's personal, Sir."
A. J. relaxed his stance. "At ease, Harm. Have a seat."
The admiral waited until the tall commander sat in one of the leather chairs before taking his seat behind the mahogany desk. Instinct told him this had something to do with Col. Mackenzie. He wasn't blind. The two of them spent most of Friday evening together. Outside. Alone. Mac was with Harm more than her fiancé. And it was her engagement party.
He'd even had to send Tiner outside to bring them in. Although both of them put on brave faces and acted if nothing was wrong, A.J. sensed something had happened between the two of them.
"Want to talk about it, Son?"
Harm shifted in his chair. "Not really, Sir."
"Do I have to make it an order?"
"But, Sir—"
"Relax, Harm. Forget I'm your CO for a moment and talk to me as a friend."
The younger man hesitated and cast his eyes downward. "I don't think I can do this, Sir."
"Do what? Your job?"
"No, Admiral. I don't think I can sit back and watch Mac marry Brumby."
So, the truth comes out.
A. J. had known sparks ignited from the moment he introduced the two of them. It didn't take long to see the chemistry between them. Yes, they worked good together—there wasn't a better team in JAG. But there was a connection, a friendship, a—dare he say—soul mates? He recalled his first "order" to them.
Don't get too familiar. You're gonna work together.
And later, in Sydney when Mac had shown up wearing that damn Aussie's ring, he saw the look in Harm's eyes.
Commander. Never look back.
Maybe he had made a mistake. Well, two mistakes.
"Have you talked to her? Told her how you feel?"
"We, uh… we talked on Friday night."
"And what did she say?"
"She said we were getting too good at saying goodbye and went straight to Brumby. She's made her decision, Admiral. Who am I to interfere?"
Only the man she's in love with.
"Harm, when two people care for one another—"
"Sir, she chose Mic. I don't have to like it, and I don't have to be happy about it. But I'll be damned if I'm going to interfere."
"But you don't want to be here to witness this 'joyous union.'"
"No, sir. Not really."
"The assignment's yours, Commander. I hope you're not making a mistake. And I'm not talking about your career."
Somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean
May 26, 2001
0430 Local
Drifting. Alone. Dark. Cold. The sea was rough tonight, the wave relentless. Nothing about this flight had gone right. First, the low-level oxygen, then the storm that moved faster than anyone anticipated, and finally, the plane failed to respond. The late ejection, the shroud lines wrapped around his neck, the jammed release.
Water's cold out there
Commander Loftness's words replayed in his mind. Had it been an omen? Why hadn't he remained on board and waited for the morning COG? It wasn't like he wanted to watch Mac walk down the aisle to Bugme.
But, foolishly, he made her a promise.
Flashback
JAG Headquarters
May 7, 2001
0900 Local
"Harm, where are you going?" Mac caught him before he got on the elevator.
"TAD to the Patrick Henry. The JAG on board had to take emergency leave. I'll be away for a few weeks."
"A few weeks! How long is that?"
"I'll be back Memorial Day weekend."
"The weekend. Saturday? Sunday? Monday? Harm you know my wedding is that Saturday morning."
"Yes, I do."
"And?"
"Look, Mac. I was already scheduled to do my six-month quals. This way I'll kill two birds with one stone."
"I'm sure there's someone else who can handle the TAD. And can't you do your quals another time?"
"To answer your first question, the Admiral gave the assignment to me. The answer to your second question is not for another six months."
"Harm you fly maximum two, maybe three times a year. And for that, you risk missing my wedding?"
"I didn't consider it a risk."
"No, the truth is you didn't consider it important."
"Hey, Mac. Slow down. First of all, doing my quals was arranged before you set a date."
"Harm, I—"
Something about the look in her eyes touched him. She looked lost, lonely. Like she was searching for answers. "Look, I'll do my best to get back."
"I still don't know why you have to go."
"Duty, Mac."
"Yeah sure, it's those damn quals. Nothing comes between you and flying. Not even your best friend's wedding."
"Frankly, Mac if you need me at your wedding to make it work, maybe you should reconsider who it is your marrying."
He knew then he'd pushed the wrong button.
"Mac—"
"Have fun."
"Aren't you going to wish me luck?"
She turned and stormed away.
Present Day
He hadn't talked to her since then. But the look in her eyes haunted him the entire time on the carrier. She might be a brave Marine on the outside, but on the inside, she was vulnerable.
How had they gotten to this point? He'd asked her a similar question on the Watertown.
The three weeks on the Henry had given him a lot of time to think. He' had relived the mistakes he'd made with her over and over in his mind. The biggest one in Sydney. He hadn't intended to push her away, but he did. Straight into the arms of Brumby.
And then the night on the Admiral's porch…
Mac, you have someone who will always love you.
And you have someone who loves you.
Sure, she'd gone back inside to Mic. What else was she supposed to do? But they had stood side-by-side, the backs of their hands brushing.
He'd be dammed if he was going to lose her to that Aussie. So, instead of waiting, he'd climbed in the cockpit of an F-14.
Waters cold out there.
He was tired, cold, weary. Harm didn't have Mac's sense of timing, but he knew he'd been in the water for hours. How much longer could he hold on?
As long as it takes.
But hour after hour passed without any signs of someone coming to rescue him. He couldn't hold on much longer.
Harm!
Was it Mac's voice?
Where are you Harm?
Yes, she was here. Calling him.
No. Mac's not here. It's your imagination.
But after hearing her voice, he was no longer cold. He felt warm, drowsy.
What's that light? A rescue helo?
No there was no sound of rotor blades. Even the sounds of the waves had diminished. There was only light and warmth.
He was in a long tunnel. Heading for the source of light.
Peaceful. It's so peaceful.
Was this Heaven? He was drawn to the light. To the warmth. And somehow, he knew there was no turning back.
"I'm sorry, Mac."
He closed his eyes and allowed the waves to pull him under.
