I don't own anything from Ben 10. They only like him because he's a wolf.

Doctor Animo, nefarious mad scientist and all-around persistent bad seed, that fun loving psycho, wandered the streets of Bellwood aimlessly while wondering why he was wandering the streets of Bellwood aimlessly. He came to the conclusion that he was put there by the author for no reason. This triviality angered him, so he decided to make one up to induce a better plot. He saw a ladybug in a bush as he passed by. He jumped at it.

"I shall catch you and make you into a giant mutant. Then I, DOCTOR ANIMO, shall lead you into battle against my enemies! Mostly Ben Tennyson. He's got some stupid annoying family members I hate as well, but not as much as him," Doctor Animo said.

He threw the captured ladybug into the air and aimed his Transmodulator at it. He fired. The ladybug, unfortunately, was incinerated by too much concentrated high energy levels.

"Whoops." Doctor Animo frowned. "Maybe I'll use something bigger and more durable."

He wandered to a tree. There, he located a cute little chipmunk. He turned down the power controls on his Transmodulator before preparing to fire. The scent of burnt squirrel was a lot nastier than burnt bug.

"You shall be my newest creation! Prepare to become as awesome as me, DOCTOR ANIMO!" he yelled.

He fired.

The chipmunk exploded.

"Damn it! I need to adjust this thing." He removed his helmet and inspected it.

Out of nowhere, Kai Green and Ben Tennyson appeared. How convenient for the plot.

"Turn into Benwolf," Kai begged.

"No, I don't wanna," said Ben.

"Please?"

"No! He's not even cool! Why does everyone like him so much?"

"Wolves are the best animals."

"No they're not. Tigers are."

"No, wolves!"

"Tigers."

"Wolves!"

"Tigers!"

"WOLVES!"

"TIGERS!"

"You're both idiots! FROGS are the best animal," interrupted Doctor ANIMO as he came bursting through the trees on his mutated frog, Old Reliable.

"Oh no, it's Doctor DORKamo again," Ben groaned. "Well, he's not much of a threat. More of a nuisance than anything. Let's ignore him and maybe he'll go away."

"You should turn into Benwolf and just get rid of him so we can continue our debate without more interruptions," said Kai impatiently.

"What debate?" Ben grunted. "All we're doing is yelling at each other like a damn married couple."

Kai threw her head back and laughed. "Ha ha, I know, how stupid, right?"

"I know, right?" Ben slapped his knee while joining her in loud ironic laughter. "That is such a dumb pairing the creators of the show would never want to force on us, right?"

"Right!" Kai agreed.

They both laughed loudly.

"Will you two shut the fuck up already?" Doctor Animo snarled. Once he had their full attention, he resumed announcing his evil scheme. "I put a shit load of deadly venom from all kinds of other venom wielding predators into my mutated frog's DNA this time. When it licks you or if you touch it, you'll die! Now hold still so I can kill you."

"Wait, how can you ride on it without dying yourself, Animo?" Ben asked, cocking his eyebrow. Hmmm, cocking.

Doctor Animo laughed. "I was prepared for that. You see, I've already given myself genetic immunity to every venom in existence. So I don't need to worry about the story making me get poisoned, fall off my frog, and shit my pants or something fucking dumb and humiliating like the what usually happens to me! So there. NYAH, NYAH!" He gave both kids the finger. One on each hand. The middle ones. And I mean the sign.

"You're still an idiot," Ben said while wearing a smug grin.

"I'm a GENIUS!" Doctor Animo screamed. "I'd prove it to you by showing you my Verities award...IF I HAD ONE!"

Ben transformed into the freakish yet popular Eye Guy. "EYE think you're going to get punched in the face a lot, by my FIST, Doc!"

"We'll see about that."He pointed. "Kill him a lot, my pet!"

His frog tried to punch Eye Guy with its slimy tongue. Eye Guy saw it coming. Get it?

"You suck," Ben taunted. "I can see everything. I don't have to watch where I'm going." But he didn't see a tree right in front of him and smashed right into it, proving the statement to be extremely false. "OW! MY EYE!"

"Which one?" Kai asked.

Eye Guy screamed in pain. "ALL OF THEM!"

"Why don't you turn into something that can actually fight," Kai said, looking very bored and irritated. She crossed her arms and sighed. She tapped her foot. "Oh, I know. Turn into Benwolf!"

"NO!" Eye Guy yelled, stumbling. He continued stumbling blindly and almost put his hands on Doctor Animo's frog. The frog tried to lick him in the eye, but he screamed and ran away at the last minute. "THAT'S DISGUSTING, man! Don't you DARE!"

"Turn into Benwolf," Kai coaxed, "and I'll show you my boooooobs."

The Omnitrix timed out. Ben avoided Doctor Animo's frog until it warmed up again, smiling stupidly the entire time. When it recharged, he dialed in Benwolf.

"Aaaaaw riiiight," Ben said, eagerly rubbing his hands together, shortly before realizing something. "Hey, wait...you don't HAVE any boobs!"

Kai jumped in and hugged Ben's cute and sexy wolf form. "Too late!"

"AWW, MAN," Ben-wolf growled. "I got played."

"Maybe I'll grow some one day in the future," Kai said, shrugging.

"Yeah, and maybe you'll wield Excalibur," Ben-wolf said before bursting into hysterical laughter. Kai frowned at him.

"You know, Tennyson," Doctor Animo said lustfully, wearing a disturbing look of desire on his face, "I never noticed how muscular that wolf form of yours was."

"Whoa! Hands off, weirdo!" Ben exclaimed. He made the cross with his alien wolf fingers. Kai tried hugging him again. He backed away. "You too! No one touches the merchandise!"

"Baby got back," Kai said as she slapped his rear.

Ben yelped. "Hey!"

"Baby got front, too," Doctor Animo noted. His goggles did a good job of covering up his lecherous stare, but it oozed through his expression and tone.

Ben did his best to cover up his crotch and chest with his hands. "Help! I'm being sexually harassed by FURRIES!"

"I just want to pet you a little," Doctor Animo yelled. He jumped on Ben's back.

"Me first! But I also want you to pet me," Kai said. She grabbed Benwolf's waist.

"IT'S CUDDLE TIME!" Doctor Animo yelled. He squeezed Benwolf with all his might. It wasn't much because he's weak as shit, but it was enough to be uncomfortable.

"AAAAAH! NO! STOP! HELP! ASSAULT!" Ben fell to the ground. He tried to do a fireman roll to get rid of the annoying clingers. "NO MEANS NO! NO MEANS NO!"

By some grace of good fortune, the Omnitrix timed out. Ben reverted back to his not as furry human form. Both Kai and Animo released him. They looked disgusted.

"EW!" they said in unison while backing away from Ben.

"Suddenly you're not hot," Kai said.

"Both of you are totally shallow jerks!" Ben shouted at them. "You don't like me for me. You only like what I can be turned into." He burst into hysterical sobs.

"I don't like you at all, Tennyson," said Doctor Animo. He coughed into his hand. He turned away, looking into the sky. "I just have a lot of fur fetishes."

Kai kicked him in the balls. He gasped and fell down. The mutant frog just stood there, watching for flies. It wasn't very intelligent. With Doctor Animo distracted, it started hopping around chasing after its tiny dinner.

"I saved you, Ben," Kai said. She leaned down and kissed his cheek. "I guess sometimes you're still cute when you're a human. But not much." She skipped away.

Ben panicked and wiped his cheek frantically. "Ew, gross! Girls are full of cooties and STDs and Satan's temptations!" he cried.

An inter-time-dimensional portal opened randomly and a big white gorilla came out. Doctor Animo's head in a big glass jar was screwed onto where the gorilla's head would have been. "You know you two fuck each other in the future?" he said while grinning.

Ben screamed.

"And your baby is really ugly. It looks like you!" Animo threw his head back and laughed loudly, sloshing the liquid in his glass jar.

Ben screamed again. "FUCK OFF WITH YOUR BULLSHIT, WEIRD FUTURE ANIMO!" He blinked for a moment. "Wait, is everyone in the future a head in glass jars like in Futurama?"

"No," said future Animo. "Just me. I'm super elite like that."

"What happened to you anyway?" asked Ben.

Future Animo developed a thousand yard stare until Ben snapped his fingers loudly. Future Animo shook his head. The liquid sloshed around again. "I don't wanna talk about it."

Ben looked annoyed. "It's probably a stupid story anyway."

"I blew up my body, okay!" He threw up his hands. Ben laughed. "It's not funny! I HAVE PTSD FROM THIS, OKAY?" Future Animo yelled while pointing to his decapitated glass jar head.

"It's funny to me. Because it proves you're a fucking idiot," Ben said.

Future Animo clenched his giant hairy monkey fists at Ben.

"Yikes. How unfortunate. But at least I don't have to worry about getting kicked in the nuts anymore," current Doctor Animo said and rubbed his aching crotch. "I don't know how comfortable I am with knowing I won't have a dick or a prostate to enjoy in the future. Is there anyway I could prevent that from happening to me? Or you...or me...who is you...who is also me."

"No," the future Doctor Animo said angrily. "You'll just have to enjoy my body while it's still intact. I mean your body. I mean our body...I mean. Ah, fuck this time travel bullshit! Nothing makes sense anyway. Also the world ends in 3045 thanks to unchecked global warming and rampant overpopulation depleting all resources, and a couple religious wars. Not even Ben, the fabled hero of earth, could fix that perpetually escalating hot mess. Enjoy your shitty future, assholes!"

He jumped back into the portal before it closed, leaving everyone in the present Ben 10 timeline confused and saddened.

TBC?

Who knows. Who cares.