Addiction

Part 1 - Deidara

I'm a disease

The ticking of the clock and the sound of students scribbling on the paper filled the room as Deidara stared blankly at the white sheet before him. He had not written anything yet, even though the time was quickly running out and they had roughly ten minutes to finish.

Deidara would not make any use of that time. He just couldn't concentrate on the test, or anything for that matter. His mind was clouded with worries and doubts, a very bothersome combination that inevitably resulted in overwhelming anxiety, therefore robbing him of all his power to focus.

Deidara Iwaga was a sophomore in Akatsuki Academy - a high school for humans and vampires. In a world where humans and vampires had managed to coexist peacefully for the past two centuries, schools like this were only to promote the illusion of how close the two species had become after a millennium of wars.

It was all propaganda, of course, because the reality was that the wars had never really ended. They'd just moved underground, while the ones walking in sunlight were forced to believe the lie. By 'the ones walking in sunlight' we mean humans, specifically. The vamps were a bit more organized and appreciated truth among their own kind more than the humans seemed to. Additionally, they were rarely seen walking in sunlight for the effect it had on their albino skin and blood red eyes.

As we have ended up at the description of a stereotypical vampire, let it be so. We shall continue on the same path.

A vampire, born in moonlight, would always have pale skin. Due to their scarlet eyes, humans often drew parallels between them and albinos, although they hardly had anything in common. The colour of their skin was a trait passed on through generations, nothing to do with an illness. The redness of their eyes came from the blood they consumed - as vampires were committed to spending their life in the dark, a good fifth of the energy they got from the blood was spent on the eyes. One could tell a freshly fed vamp by the bright red irises.

The vampires' blood was thicker than humans', which resulted in a much slower blood flow in their system. This was why the redness was slow to disappear after feeding. It usually took the time until the next meal for it to completely fade and even then it would be instantly restored. The only way to see the real eye colour of a specific individual was to let them starve for a day or two - good luck finding someone willing to put up with that, though.

As previously mentioned, vampires and humans weren't necessarily on good terms behind the scenes and to prove that, there were the policies of Akatsuki Academy.

Number one, by 6.30 PM all human students were expected to have returned to the dormitory. The classes for vampires started at 7 PM, so naturally, the teens of the two species would not have a chance to meet. The vampires would be back in their dorm before sunrise, which was, of course, before the classes started for humans.

Number two, should any human be caught on the grounds of the vampire dormitory, they were, without any further investigation, expelled. And to make things seem fair, the same went for vampires. At least that was how it was supposed to work. Rumors were that some had been caught red-handed (literally), after giving in to temptation and feeding on some human students (which was strictly forbidden), but no vamp had been expelled yet.

To sum up, whilst there was no specific rule to forbid humans and vampires from socializing, everything was done to prevent it.

The only time they did ever meet was on the first day of school in the auditorium where the headmaster (a well respected human among vampires) gave her annual speech and new students were welcomed and introduced the school policy. Hence the rules were repeated every year, ensuring that all the students knew them by heart.

Since it was a once-a-year thing, the memory of the vampires was vague in the minds of the human students. The only thing any of them could actually recall was the inhumane beauty.

Deidara sighed and folded his arms on the desk, resting his head on them. Even though he never thought of it that way, he knew his life would have been a lot easier, were it like his classmates'. Not involving any vampires.

He pushed the sleeve on his left arm up a bit, revealing an almost healed wound. It was a half-circle, some parts of the line darker than the others. Like someone had sunk their teeth into the flesh. Someone with inhumanly sharp teeth.

That happened to be exactly the case.

Having seen hardly anything that would have thoroughly scared him, Deidara was curious by nature, lacking at times what they called self-preservation. Young and rebellious as he was, he had not cared about the rules or the chances of getting caught and being expelled. So, four months ago, he had done something many had been dared to do, many had sworn to do, but no-one had actually had the courage to do - snuck into the vampire dormitory.

Deidara had gone there at midnight when he knew all the vamps would be in class - his only goal had been to look around him anyway, see things others could not. Getting into the building had gone unexpectedly smoothly, even too smoothly - like an omen that something would definitely go wrong. Although he had not thought about it back then.

He had walked down a hallway that resembled much the ones in the human dormitory without worrying until he ended up in a communal living room. What had caught his eye first had been the aristocratic look all the sofas, tables and TVs had here - school had been more generous when decorating this room than it had been in the human dorm. A pang of jealousy had struck through him and he had caught himself wishing he could have transferred there, even if that meant letting himself be turned into a vampire. Because really, a room like that was to die for and Deidara hadn't been sure anymore whether he did want, after seeing that kind of luxury, to see the dorm bedrooms.

Unfortunately he had not got to dwell on that thought for long, for half a minute into his stay, he had noticed something he should have noticed the second he had entered the room. Or someone, to be more precise. Or that someone had noticed him, to be even more accurate.

Deidara had backed down a good deal of steps the second he noticed him, but hadn't been foolish enough to break into a run. That would not have solved anything. Or maybe it would have, but he would never know.

Lying on the leather sofa, one hand supporting his head and the other holding a book open for reading, had been a very pale, very attractive, very red-haired guy. Very non-human, very vampire. And by the look in his blood-red eyes, Deidara could guess that the guy had noticed him a lot sooner.

"What're you doing here?" the vampire had asked, his voice smooth as silk, charming Deidara from the first syllable. "You shouldn't be here."

Deidara had swallowed. "A tour?" he'd offered, his wittiness not abandoning him even at a time like that. "The do-it-yourself kind."

Deidara hadn't been sure whether it was just his imagination, or if he had actually seen the other's corner of mouth twitch upwards for a second.

Regardless, the redhead had put down the book and got up from the sofa, advancing with a slyly amused expression. "So you're a self-made tour guide?"

Deidara had taken a step back. "More or less," he had all but whispered, feeling his voice leaving him as the way-too-attractive-to-exist guy had been pacing towards him at a teasingly slow speed. "Still waiting for a diploma."

That had earned a chuckle from the vamp. "But to me you look more like a waiter," he'd mused out loud.

"And why is that?" Deidara had breathed, continuing to move backwards despite knowing he was running out of space - there had been less than a meter between him and the wall behind him.

"Because it seems like you have brought me my meal," the guy had purred deviously and placed his hands on either side of the blond as the latter had finally collided with the wall.

It had been quite quick for Deidara. He had frozen between the other's arms, incapable of defending himself in any way. He had listened to the guy's seductive chuckle as he had run his tongue up the blond's neck, before sinking his teeth into the sweet, sweet flesh.

Deidara had not screamed. A single high-pitched gasp had escaped his mouth as his entire body had been pressed against the attractive male's, but that had been only due to the surprise brought on by the foreign feeling. Not due fear. Deidara had not felt fear. After all, something new had been what he had come looking for and this certainly qualified.

He had grabbed the other by the black, button-up shirt (a part of the school uniform; humans wore white), the first few buttons popping open, once he had felt his legs starting to give away, but had not attempted to pull away.

Deidara's head had started to swim, but it had only been when a low moan had escaped from his mouth that he'd known he was actually enjoying that. It had been one of those forbidden kind of pleasures that tasted of self-destruction but were only made so much more tempting because of that.

His grip on the guy's shirt had tightened, his fingers sinking deep into the other's skin. They had stayed there while Deidara had felt his energy being drained away by the bitter pleasure, until he had not been able to hold on for any longer.

Everything had gone black in a flash and Deidara was oblivious of what exactly had happened afterwards. He may have come to at some point, but had surely gone back under in a matter of seconds.

The next time Deidara had opened his eyes, he'd found himself in a completely different environment than before. The room had been dim and he hadn't been able to make out much, but he'd been sure of three things at least: one, the walls were in rich dark colours; two, he was lying in bed and three, there was no ceiling lamp. What we had mentioned before became apparent here: vampires preferred dark.

"You're awake," the same silky voice had said and Deidara would have tensed all over his body, had he not been feeling so high, like on drugs, and so weak that he couldn't move a single limb.

So instead he had laughed. "Hell yes," he'd said, "although I feel more like in a dream. You must've drunk me half dry." He had chuckled again. "Bastard."

"It's your own fault for coming here to spy," the vampire had retorted, yet his voice had not been completely at ease. "Can you sit up?"

Deidara had tried, but to no avail. He had been completely drained. He had whispered, "No." He had heard the other cuss after that.

After a minute of silence, the weight on the bed had shifted and the guy had climbed over the blond. In the split-second he'd had, Deidara hadn't known what to expect - was he going to drink even more?

"Open your mouth," the vampire had said and Deidara had obeyed without any questions.

The guy had just smashed their lips together, instantly shoving his tongue into the blond's mouth. Taken by surprise, Deidara had not known how to respond and had even kept his eyes open. Only once he had begun to taste the salty taste of blood on the other's tongue, had he caught on and let his eyes fall closed.

The student textbooks referred to it as "blood exchange". Back in the war days, there had been groups of humans and vampires fighting on the same side. In the infirmaries human nurses had let the vamps feed on them to restore their strength, but to prevent any permanent injuries, the vampires had repaid in their own blood, letting the nurses drink it. As the vampires' blood was thicker than the humans', only half of what the vampire had consumed was required to be returned.

They had learnt about it in their first year already. What had not been taught to them, since feeding on humans was against the law and the information had been seen as unnecessary, yet what they had found out later, was that to avoid dizzy spells, a vampire could not feed so much without repaying some of it in between. But, as stated, that had only become clear later.

So even after the big kiss, which was actually just Deidara drinking the blood from the vampire's tongue and lip, which the latter had bitten to bleed, Deidara had still looked as pale as a ghost - or a vampire - and couldn't even walk without collapsing. Hence, the vampire had let him stay the night.

"What's your name?" Deidara had asked the other while lying in bed, the other sitting in the armchair by the bed, probably finding leaving the blond alone too risky. Because, after all, should anyone have found out about this, not only would he have been expelled, but, for drinking from a human, beheaded also.

"None of your business," the redhead had replied sharply.

Deidara had frowned into the darkness surrounding him. "Alright, Mr. None Of Your Business, why don't you want to tell me your name?"

"Why're you interested in knowing it?" the other had countered almost immediately.

Deidara had shrugged. "I usually like knowing the name of the person I make out with."

Even in the darkness Deidara could sense the mask of irritation that had covered the vampire's face at his words. "We were not making out."

Deidara had chuckled. "Well, I don't know about you, but that's what we, we as in humans, call locking lips and shoving our tongue into the other's mouth."

"It was merely a blood exchange," the vampire had pressed through gritted teeth.

"Have it your way," Deidara had replied. "Regardless of what you call it, I'd still be interested in your name."

"Why?" the redhead had asked. "To rat on me to the headmaster?" Disgust had reflected in his voice, to which Deidara had snorted as a reply.

"Yeah, that sounds like a flawless plan," Deidara had retorted sarcastically, then continued in a theatrical tone, "hey Ms. Tsunade, Mr. None Of Your Business fed on me and I want him expelled. Oh, you're curious of where that happened when humans and vampires aren't supposed to meet? Well, shit, Miss, I'd love to tell you, but that would get me expelled, too, you see?"

Deidara had turned his head to look at the redhead. As his eyes had begun to adapt to the darkness, he could make out the silhouette of the redhead sitting in the armchair. "You do realize that would not work, right?" the blond had said, "I could not sell you out without digging my own grave." He had let the other take his words in before asking again, "Will you tell me now?"

There had been a long silence, which had had Deidara thinking the redhead was much more stubborn than he'd initially taken him for.

He had turned out to be right

"No" had been the vampire's final answer and the word to finish the conversation. They had not talked more that night. Deidara had eventually fallen asleep and woken up in the infirmary next morning.

He had asked the nurse how he'd ended up there and the woman had replied, "A fellow student from the other dormitory brought you in. Said he'd found you collapsed outside. Do you remember fainting?"

"Uh, n-no," Deidara had replied and lain back down on the bed. That was where he had thought it would end.

-x-

Deidara smiled bitter-sweetly, his insides clenching at the memory. Oh, how wrong he had been... as that had only been the beginning. The beginning of a dream. A dream of dreams. Something surreal and forbidden. Love or lust. Perhaps both, he didn't know. Perhaps only one of them.

-x-

The stubborn vampire had shown up two days later in the blond's bedroom at midnight. Deidara had just come out of shower when, after stepping into the room, spotting the redhead on his bed had scared the living daylights out of him.

He had not bothered asking how he had got in there; if he had managed to break into a vamp dorm, he could only imagine how easy it could have been for that guy to get into his room.

Instead he had said, "Came back for more?" More as a joke than anything, really.

Unexpectedly, the vampire had seemed to take it seriously as he had replied, "Depends."

Deidara had arched an eyebrow as he'd gone to put away his towel and bottle of shampoo. "On what?" he'd inquired.

The redhead had had his elbows propped on the knees as he'd kept tangling and untangling his fingers. "On whether you want to."

Deidara had sat himself on the edge of his bed, crossing his legs. The puzzled look he had given the vamp had clearly demanded, Explain.

The vampire had understood that. "I won't do anything, if you don't want to. I can just leave," he had stated as the first thing. "But," he had gone on, "I just thought it'd be a sweet deal for both of us."

He had paused before continuing, his face thoughtful. "As a vampire, it is quite obvious why it would be a sweet deal. You're very tasty." He had chuckled. "Delicious."

Deidara had blushed and looked away. He hadn't really appreciated being talked of as mere food, let him be referred to as delicious or not.

"Although I can't say for sure as I'm not human, but I've read that for you - humans, I mean - the experience is quite - mm - pleasurable." He had given the blond a small smile, looking almost apologizing for being so blunt.

The things he'd said had been true. When textbooks told about vampires feeding on humans, they only talked of it as a destructive way for vampires to power themselves up. A way of wiping out mankind. No words about how humans felt about it, only that it could end in their death. Which was true, but only if done carelessly. Deidara had come to a conclusion of his own that it was only forbidden due to the same old war between the two species.

Because that night - the night when he had been drunk from for the first time - he had got to experience first-hand what it was like to have a vampire feed on him. He couldn't compare it to sex, since he'd still been a virgin back then, but it had been definitely the best sensation anyone had ever made him feel.

And that had been his motivation for walking over to the door, locking it and coming back to crawl onto the redhead's lap. He'd swiped the hair out of the way to reveal his neck and opened the first two buttons on his shirt to grant better access. He'd put his hands on the other's shoulders and cocked his head to one side.

The vampire's smile had bared his sharp fangs as he'd licked a spot on the bare neck just like the first time. "This will be our little secret," he'd whispered before sinking his teeth into the flesh.

-x-

Deidara felt the familiar, uncomfortable tightness in his pants when thinking about the memory. He bit the inside of his cheek. Oh Jesus...

-x-

The redhead hadn't drunk so much at once than he'd had before. Guess he had learnt his lesson. So even though Deidara had felt dizzy and high afterwards, he hadn't felt weak.

The vampire had bit his lip and tongue to bleed again and kissed the blond. Deidara's hands had crawled up to the red hair, burying themselves in it. He had felt the scrunchie being pulled out from his hair and hadn't understood the point of it until he had been lain down on the bed, the redhead climbing on top of him.

"Do you wish to go farther than this?" the latter had asked when breaking the kiss.

Deidara hadn't really given it much thought back then. He had known what he wanted and his wish had been right before him. So he'd just pressed his lips against the vampire's again and opened his mouth.

"Name's Sasori," the vampire had muttered as his fingers had worked on unbuttoning the blond's shirt and tearing it off.

"Why're you telling me this now?" Deidara had asked, feeling confused.

Sasori had smirked. "Just thought it'd be good for you to know."

He had let the blond dispose of his shirt as well before biting his neck again, forcing his fangs to go deep.

"Deidara," the blond had murmured a reply to the unvoiced question before emitting a loud moan as his nails had dug deeper into the redhead's back.

"You're greedy." He had chuckled as Sasori had pulled away again. The latter had instantly connected their lips. His mouth had still tasted of Deidara's own blood and that was when the blond had realized it wasn't a blood exchange anymore. It was something a lot more pleasure-oriented.

Sasori's hands had moved downwards to unbuckle the blond's pants; he had pulled away for that.

"Are you a virgin, Dei-da-ra?" Sasori had asked, smiling slyly at the scarlet blush that had tinted the blond's cheeks. Deidara hadn't even needed to answer the question.

Sasori had chuckled and purred in his ear, "I'll try to go easy."

'Easy' wasn't exactly the word Deidara would have used to describe his first time. It had been quite rough - all Sasori was, was rough, the only question lied in how rough - but Deidara wasn't complaining.

He had realized quite soon why Sasori had finally told him his name. He could tell the redhead had enjoyed hearing him scream the name in both pleasure and pain as he had been rocking on top of him.

"Let me hear you say it, babe," he had told the blond when ramming into him.

Deidara's back had arched as he had yelled out loud, "AHHH- SA-SO-RI- more-"

The redhead had quickened the pace even more, sweat dripping from his forehead. He hadn't been going easy at all.

"I- need- blood, Sasori," Deidara had whispered as he could feel the same weakness making its way to his limbs as it had before. "Gimme. Please."

Sasori had pressed his sharp nail into his own neck and lowered it to bring it to the blond's mouth. Deidara had bitten the flesh, even though his teeth were far from sharp enough to go deep, and started sucking the blood. It had tasted good. Even better because it had been Sasori's. It had tasted like heaven.

"I'm- gonna- come-" Deidara had gasped, his grip tightening on the redhead's shoulders. "Ahh- AHHH- SASORIIII!"

The warm, white liquid had spurted out onto their stomachs, not long before Deidara had felt the other fill him up on the inside as well.

Sasori had collapsed on top of him, exhausted. Their breathing had been uneven as they had panted, the red-haired head resting on Deidara's chest, listening to his racing heartbeat. Soon he had moved to the side, though, letting the blond rest on top of him. His hand had run through the messy long hair as their breathing had begun to slow down.

"Please, don't leave before I wake up," Deidara had begged him, "you can wake me up early, just don't leave while I'm asleep."

"Why?" Sasori had asked but Deidara had just shaken his head. He hadn't wanted to explain how he wanted to talk about what was going to happen next but he was too tired for it at that moment. Would they continue or had it been a two-time thing?

"I'll let you drink from me," he had murmured, before closing his eyes and snuggling closer.

He'd heard a sigh from the redhead. "You've got me sold, human." This had brought a smile to the blond's face.

"Thank you," he had murmured, before falling asleep.

-x-

"Ten minutes left to finish!" the teacher announced from his seat, but Deidara didn't even raise his head. The test held absolutely no interest for him.

-x-

That morning Deidara had really woken up in the arms of the redhead. At first he'd thought the other was still sleeping, but had soon realized he only had his eyes closed.

"You stayed," Deidara had muttered, surprise reflecting in his tone.

"I did promise, didn't I?" Sasori had responded without opening his eyes. He had looked so relaxed between the snow white sheets that Deidara had got the unbearable urge to stay with him there the whole day long.

"You didn't wake me," Deidara had murmured, hoping for an explanation. He had been sure the redhead would awaken him before dawn. The sun had already been up in the sky.

"It's Saturday. I figured you'd want to sleep in," Sasori had explained casually. "Besides, I'm in no hurry to leave."

Deidara's stomach had fluttered at that statement, although a small irking detail had also popped into his head at the other's words. "You mean I promised you could drink my blood in the morning, too, for nothing?"

Sasori had chuckled. "More or less. But it's great to know that you're so generous."

He had flipped them over and kissed the blond on the lips. "You're not gonna break your promise, are you?" he had purred, the sound sending a shiver to spread throughout Deidara's entire body.

The blond had forced their lips together for one more time, before Sasori had moved away to his neck.

-x-

"Five more minutes!" the teacher called out, Deidara ignoring him just like he had before. He didn't have time or energy for the test; he needed to figure out where he'd gone wrong.

-x-

Once dressed, the two had talked through their plans for the near future.

"I wouldn't mind dropping by more often," Sasori had said, filling Deidara's stomach with butterflies again. This was what had laid the foundation for their odd relationship.

Both of them had had their own conditions. Deidara's had been that Sasori would always inform him when he was not going to visit and that he would not be seeing anyone else (the last part had made the redhead smirk).

Sasori had only had one condition: that Deidara would never come to the vamp dormitory on his own again. When Deidara had asked, if it was because the other feared he could be expelled, Sasori had replied with, "A bit of that. Plus, I've no interest in sharing."

When he'd said 'sharing', Deidara had realized the redhead had meant him and that he did not want others drinking from him. A small part of the blond had dared to hope that it wasn't solely about his blood.

-x-

"Alright, time's up!" the teacher called out and started walking about to collect the papers. "Your paper is completely blank, Iwaga!" he all but snarled, giving his student a dirty look.

Deidars shrugged. "I'm not feeling too well."

"Well you should havegone to the nurse before the test. This excuse won't save you from an F." That teacher and Deidara had never really got along.

Deidara shrugged and started packing his stuff. "Like I give a fuck," he muttered under his breath as he zipped up the pencil case. He was out of the door earlier than the teacher got to announce that they were all dismissed.

Deidara sighed in frustration while stomping down the hallway, heading to his next class.

Sasori had been gone for a week now. It wouldn't have been that big of a deal, if it wasn't for the fact that he had just disappeared without telling the blond. During the four months they had been, uhm, for the lack of a better term - together, this was the first time he'd disappeared for so long without a warning.

Deidara was worried sick. Had he done something wrong? Was this like an unofficial break-up?

Sasori had come to his room nearly every night as he'd forbidden the blond from going to the vamp dorm alone. So even if he had disappeared for a day or two, Deidara had never gone searching for him - because the redhead would always be back with a valid excuse.

Even that one night when Deidara had been sick with a fever and Sasori had shown up, he hadn't left, even though he could not drink from the blond then - he had let the blond be in bed and had lain with him. He had only left at dawn when the nurse had come to check on the blond, but had returned during the day. That had been the first time Deidara had seen the redhead sleep (Sasori'd slept beside him, but Deidara had woken up from time to time).

But this time it was different. Sasori hadn't shown up for eight nights straight and Deidara had long ago decided he was going to get to the bottom of it. He would do it tonight, at midnight. Just like all those months ago.

He would find out what was up with Sasori.

-x-

Precisely at midnight, Deidara was at the emergency exit he had used four months ago to get into the building. It seemed like nothing had changed - it was still unlocked and there still weren't any security cameras in sight. Deidara just let himself in.

The harder part was finding Sasori's room, though. Deidara had only been inside it - he had been unconscious both when Sasori had carried him there and out of it.

Deidara decided to start out in the living room. A small part of him had been hoping that he'd find the redhead lying on the same sofa, reading again, and with a perfect excuse for having disappeared for so long. Deidara's dearest wish was that everything was alright and greatest fear that everything was but that.

Even though he had known how unlikely it was to find Sasori at his usual spot - if everything had been as usual, he would've had no reason to be there - but still he couldn't help hoping. He felt himself die a little bit on the inside when seeing the place completely empty.

Deidara sighed, feeling anxiety taking over him. He sat down on the sofa, burying his face in his hands. Oh how he wished Sasori would just appear out of thin air and sit beside him. But even when he uncovered his face in what seemed like forever, the room was just as empty as it had been when he had arrived.

Deidara clenched his fists. No, he would not fall to pieces like this, he told himself and forced himself to believe it. He stood up. I'm not giving up.

He left the room, choosing the closest door leading to a hallway. In the corridor the doors to the bedrooms were set quite far apart, showing just how big the rooms really were. Much bigger in size than the humans'.

Deidara built up his courage, letting himself have faith in everyone being in class. The thought awakened a new theory inside of him. Maybe Sasori had been busy in school and that was why he hadn't been able to visit?

No matter how much Deidara would have wanted to believe that, he couldn't not deny the unlikeliness of it. Sasori had never been one to show much interest in and care for education. Actually, the only thing Deidara had seen him show interest in was blood. And him. And reading alone.

Deidara sighed again. He decided to pick the door to open at random.

Eenie - meenie - miney - mo... Deidara muttered, his finger stopping at a door farther down the hallway. Deidara took in an encouraging breath and started pacing towards it.

Despite the corridor being quite wide, Deidara was walking right by the left wall without even noticing it. His heartbeat was accelerating and breathing uneven, in spite of his attempts at controlling it.

Precisely at the time Deidara stepped in front of another door, it cracked open, making the blond's heart skip a beat and legs freeze. For a split-second he could not move.

He witnessed a pale hand reach out and saw a flash of someone's face in the darkness of the room. Before he could contemplate, the hand grabbed him harshly and pulled him inside, the door slamming shut behind him.

"Ah!" he yelled in surprise as he was pushed against a wall, hitting his head hard. Someone was holding him firmly in place, but it was pitch-black and he couldn't even make out the face that was inches away from him.

He felt a hand grab a hold of his shirt and jerk open a few buttons. He could hear the person's shaky breathing right next to his ear and could feel the warmness of the breath against his neck. Deidara swallowed and let out a shallow breath.

There was silence.

"I'm sorry," the person whispered before running a tongue along the blond's neck.

"S-sasori?" Deidara gasped in both relief and surprise. He was aware of something being awfully wrong, he could feel the vampire shaking against him, but at the same time, he could not even begin to describe the happiness he felt at the other's presence. He wrapped his hands around him, wanting to take the most out of his closeness. "Sasori," he whispered happily, a single tear running down his cheek. "I'm so glad I found you."

Sasori pressed his fangs into him.

Deidara had never felt him go so deep into him, he always seemed to be keeping moderation in mind so he wouldn't hurt him. But it looked as though Sasori wasn't really thinking now.

Deidara pressed his teeth together to suppress a moan. His hands on Sasori's shirt clenched. Truth was, it hurt like hell. Like a very hellish hell. Sasori had never been this into it, Deidara suspected he hadn't fed in a while and wondered what the reason was. He knew that, since it was forbidden for vampires to drink from humans, they were given blood sent in from special blood banks.

The pleasure that usually came with being drunk from was incredibly small compared to the pain this time. Deidara forced his mouth to stay shut to keep himself from screaming in agony. He knew Sasori needed this and didn't want to make it hard for him.

He couldn't keep the slur, "Ahh-sassssrii" from escaping his mouth as something suddenly changed and it didn't hurt that much anymore. The pain started to fade away and Deidara could feel his muscles relax. His grip on Sasori loosened and he let out a low moan that was stretched very long as now it was all pleasure for him. His breathing and heartbeat slowed down as he couldn't keep his voice to himself anymore. His head started to swim and limbs felt overly weak again.

"Sa-so-riii," he breathed, not sure if the other could hear him, or whether he was too lost in the frenzy. "I feel dizzy again," he slurred, "I think I - I - 'm gonna faint-" His voice faded out at the end of the sentence.

Before it could come to that, Sasori abruptly pulled away and caught the blond in his arms as his legs gave away. Even in the pitch-black darkness, Deidara could easily make out the glowing, bright, scarlet red eyes before he went under.

-x-

The first thing to notify Deidara that he was not sleeping anymore were two words, "I'm sorry." Even when barely conscious, he knew exactly who had said them.

"Sasori?" he whispered as he opened his eyes. To his surprise, the room wasn't dark anymore - Sasori had switched on the floor lamp by the bed. The redhead was sitting on the bed beside him, his red eyes clouded with worry. Bright, scarlet red eyes. Deidara noticed that his skin appeared a lot whiter, emphasizing the dark circles below his eyes that seemed to have got a lot darker.

"Where have you been?" the blond asked, sensing a happy smile on his own face. How long had it been since he had last seen the redhead? He was so happy to see him now, so overjoyed, even though the odd weakness in his body prevented him from showing all that. Why was he feeling so weak? He thought he had got used to being fed on a long time ago.

The worry lines between Sasori's perfectly shaped eyebrows deepened. "Long story, Dei. I'm sorry. I didn't want to, but I - couldn't."

Deidara frowned. This wasn't the kind of explanation he had expected. The redhead wasn't making any sense at all. "Were you trying to break up with me?" Deidara whispered, hurt sounding in his voice so clearly it embarrassed him. It suddenly made a lot of sense, though. Sasori wanting to break up. Not showing up anymore, hoping Deidara would catch the hint. But he had been stupid enough to worry and believe that there was something keeping the redhead from him, that he wasn't staying away of his own accord.

The smile on Deidara's face died and he looked away, feeling his eyes tear up. This was so embarrassing.

To his surprise, he heard the redhead chuckle beside him. "I admit that would be so much better for you, but I'm not selfless enough. I'll need to explain later. You need to drink."

He started to take the blond's hand to help him up, but Deidara pushed his hand away.

"No," the blond said, "I want answers now."

Sasori frowned at his stubbornness. "Brat, I'm attempting to take care of you. I drank too much. I might have reached your life blood. You need to drink now!"

Deidara did not move an inch, still facing away. He did not care about this lifeblood - whatever that was. He had been abandoned for a week and it was going to take more than a "that's not it" to get him believe he was not being used.

He heard the other male sigh.

Before Deidara could move his head to glance at the redhead, strong hands wrapped around him and pulled him up, onto the vampire's lap. He would have struggled, he wanted to, but in addition to a freshly fed vampire's strength being much greater than a regular human's, Deidara couldn't have clenched his fist had he wanted to.

"Shh," Sasori whispered in a soothing tone, "drink and we'll talk then. I promise."

Deidara's face was pushed against the redhead's neck and with all his being he hated the position he was currently in. In his opinion it differed in no way from an infant being breastfed by his mother. It was humiliating and Deidara swore in his mind to prefer death to this.

However, it only took one drop of the vampire's blood on his lips to make him second guess himself. He was hungry. As in a five-meals-a-day type of guy that had not got any food for a week kind of hungry. As in a chain smoker without a cigarette for half a month. And he was thirsty. As in an alcoholic locked in a room with gallons of the finest wine on Earth kind of thirsty.

And he felt like an addict. A heroin, cocaine and meth combined druggie locked in rehab, presented with his favorite meal after a 24-hour confinement.

So when a drop of that sweet, sweet blood got on the taste buds of his tongue, it took no more than a second until Sasori could feel him sink his teeth into his flesh.

Deidara drank for long. While he only needed half the amount he'd been stolen of, he wasn't a fast drinker. Slowing down as the first frenzy of his began to fade, he liked to savour the taste and take his time sucking on the opening in Sasori's flesh. As he slowly came to his senses, he could also hear the vampire utter the quietest moans, but moans nevertheless.

When he finally pulled away, he felt a lot stronger than he had before. He opened his eyes and locked them with Sasori's, demonstratively running his tongue across the wound as it had already started to heal.

"Delicious as always, Danna," he said with a playful smirk.

"I'd like to return the same words to yourself."

Their previous agreement all but forgotten, their lips pressed together in a tender kiss, which deepened as Deidara was lowered back to the bed, Sasori hovering over him. Sasori's hand crawled up to push the blonde hair out of the way and tuck some of it behind his ear. Deidara felt the same familiar electric buzz beneath his skin at places the redhead touched him.

Deidara's white button-up school uniform shirt was slowly unbuttoned, Sasori's hand running over his chest and stomach before pulling the entire thing off. It was tossed on the floor, along with Sasori's own shirt that he went to remove instantly after.

Deidara's hands wrapped around the vampire's neck as their tongues mingled in their passionate kiss. He had to bite his lip when Sasori moved down to nip at his neck. The redhead didn't sink his teeth in anymore, but left small pink hickeys along the way.

"I missed you," Deidara whispered, causing Sasori to instantly stop and then look up. The redhead gave the other an unreadable look, looking him in the eye. Deidara's eyes were big and sincere as he stared back, a bit dismayed by his own bluntness. It wasn't his style to blurt out everything on his mind, but this had just slipped. And now he was waiting for a reply.

A loving smile crossed Sasori's lips as he connected them with the blond's again. "I missed you, too," he breathed. "More than you could possibly imagine."

He removed Deidara's pants. Then his own. Despite the brief, sincere exchange of feelings they'd had, Sasori was tired of waiting and it was time to get down to business.

His hands stopped momentarily at the hem of the blond's boxers. He glanced up, searching for unvoiced permission on the other's face. This might as well have been the only time he ever asked Deidara permission.

Deidara gave a slight, yet determined nod. He had yet to turn the redhead down and did not see a reason to just yet. His boxers were pulled down, revealing his semi-hard cock that the redhead took in his grip and squeezed. Deidara let out a gasp and arched his back. Sasori started sliding his hand up and down, while bringing his mouth up to the blond's again.

"Come for me, baby," he whispered, the red in his eyes glowing dangerously as he opened his eyes and watched his wish being granted. Deidara moaned loudly as he cummed, bringing a playful smile to the other's face.

Deidara's breathing was heavy already. He watched the redhead grab a bottle of lube from the upper drawer of his nightstand and pour a generous amount onto his palm.

"Ready?" he asked, spreading the cold liquid over his fingers.

"Was born ready, Danna," Deidara joked. The redhead gave him a wondering look at first, which then turned into a smile and pushed two fingers inside of him.

Deidara gasped, his back arching again as his eyes squeezed shut. It was an uncomfortable feeling, but he knew that if he was patient enough, it would turn better. Much better. His hands clawed at the sheets as Sasori continued stretching him, eventually adding a third finger. It was when all the fingers left that Deidara allowed himself to let out a shaky breath to calm his breathing, but it was cut short by the redhead entering him and pushing the entire length in.

Deidara cried out loud, looping his hands around Sasori's neck again, letting his fingers dig into the skin. It had been long since the last time they'd done this and Deidara had all but forgotten what a son of a bitch the beginning could be. He felt the redhead halt and wait, something he much appreciated, even though he didn't say anything. He focused on breathing in and out as his body got used to the feeling.

It took only the slightest of nods to get Sasori moving again, starting to slide out and then back in until he had built up a steady rhythm. Meanwhile Deidara was waiting for the right spot to be hit, cringing when it was missed again.

When it was hit, though, the pleasurable feeling made the blond moan so loud he would have been worried about someone else hearing him had he not been so lost in the frenzy. Sasori picked up the pace. The bull's eyes became more frequent and the shorter the interval was between them, the louder Deidara screamed.

At one point the redhead pressed their lips together to swallow the scream, the kiss turning out rash and messy. Deidara's legs wrapped around the vampire as the latter attempted to go even deeper.

Eventually he pulled the blond up onto his lap, Deidara emitting a new loud gasp at the feeling of sitting at the top of it. He buried his face in the crook of the redhead's neck, kissing and sucking on it softly as he was lifted and then lowered onto the cock repeatedly. Their sweaty bodies rubbed against each other, creating a sort of electric vibe that sent both of their bodies into frenzy.

When their mouths locked, Deidara surprised the redhead by biting down on his lower lip and asking for permission to enter, rather than granting it. He was allowed and his tongue went to explore the vampire's warm mouth, quickly finding the fangs.

The blond chuckled lowly.

Not giving the other any time to prevent it, he pressed his tongue hard against the fang, causing it to start to bleed. He felt Sasori's body tense against him and knew it to be because he had caught him off guard. He didn't let that dismay him, though, as he continued exploring the other's mouth with the bleeding tongue, waiting for the vampire to give in.

It didn't take long for Sasori to start sucking the blood.

Deidara wasn't sure why he had done it. Had he taken it rationally, he would have seen it as rather self-destructive and maybe even too far across the limit. But he couldn't help himself. It felt so good to have the other drinking his blood that he preferred launching into it without thinking about the possible consequences.

He only had one life and he was planning on living it to the fullest.

Only when he started sensing the lack of air in his lungs did he begin to second guess his choice to feed the other through his tongue. Maybe it hadn't been such a smart thing to do after all.

He felt the pressure building up on his body; the lack of air, the racing heart, all the blood gathering in his shaft, threatening to-

Sasori released him the same moment as the white liquid burst out onto his stomach. Deidara fell on his back on the bed with a thump, the bed creaking beneath him. He felt breathless and dizzy, and even more defenseless under the amused gaze of the vampire.

He was completely under his mercy.

"Look now what you did," Sasori leaned down to purr in his ear. "You got us both dirty." A tongue ran across Deidara's ear shell. He winced and heard the other's low snicker as he did so. "And I haven't even come yet."

Sasori thrust into the blond again, going at a fast speed from the start. With Deidara moaning under him, it didn't take long for him to finish, too. He collapsed beside the blond, wrapping an arm around him.

Deidara tried moving his worn out body and climbed on top of the redhead nuzzling against his neck with his nose at first, then his lips.

Sasori got the hint and pressed his sharp nail down into his skin, creating a small opening for the blond to drink from. Deidara savoured licking the red liquid, feeling how his body regained its strength step by step.

Once done, he gave it a final lick and rested his head against Sasori's chest, listening to the heartbeat, which was so slow, if he didn't know any better, he would have thought something was wrong. The truth, however, was that a vampire's blood flow was just much slower than a human's.

They lay there in silence as their breathings began to slow down and racing hearts (Deidara's, at least) calmed down enough to not feel like they would jump out of their chests any time soon.

After an unmeasured period of time, Deidara finally spoke up, "Where have you been?"

He didn't turn his head to look at the redhead; just lay still and waited for an answer.

"Here" came the curt reply.

"Why?" Deidara inquired, feeling cautious all of a sudden. Maybe he didn't want to know the answer after all? However, he decided, it wasn't a question of whether he wanted or not; he needed to know and would bear with it, even if the truth hurt. "Why didn't you visit me?"

The silence that followed was longer than the previous one and for some time Deidara wondered whether he was going to get a reply at all.

"It's... complicated," Sasori eventually offered.

"I'm sure I can keep up," Deidara pressed. He needed to know and Sasori was not going to hold this one a secret!

"I was... wasted."

Deidara stopped breathing for a second. "For seven days?! Drunk?"

Sasori chuckled below him, even though it somehow felt forced. "Not alcohol-drunk. That's the human term. Drunk as in -" he paused, searching for the right words "-I couldn't drink anymore. Like I'd drunk too much, but that wasn't it. I grew terribly weak.

"Last Monday I nearly got caught sneaking into your room. Sorry. I couldn't make it, but I thought it wouldn't be a big deal. You could survive a day without me. As it turned out I was very wrong about it not being a big deal. By evening I was awfully thirsty, but when I went to get breakfast, I nearly puked when trying to swallow it.

"You know we get our so-called food from blood banks, right? Well, that blood is alright. Nothing like warm, fresh blood from a human, but it serves its purpose. I've never had a problem with it. Until then. I could hardly tolerate it in my mouth, let alone swallow it. So I left the canteen and went back to my room. I didn't understand what was wrong and put it down to sleep deprivation.

"I slept through classes and tried to feed again at dinner, but it was the same. I couldn't. And even though I didn't even fully realize it then, I'd lost so much strength I could hardly walk straight and all I seemed to want to do was to lie in bed.

"When I finally realized that something was seriously off and I needed to see you - took me a few days - I couldn't anymore. I was too weak to even leave my room."

A silence fell once again.

Deidara took in what he'd heard and was trying to analyze it in his brain, which proved to be an unexpected challenge as he realized how little he actually knew about vampires. Being with Sasori was his first experience with them and he knew less about their eating habits than he knew about the headmaster's personal life. (The headmaster was a very secretive person.)

"Do you feel better now?" After taking all factors into consideration, Deidara came to the realization that this was what mattered to him the most in the end. This time, he made the effort to look up at the redhead's face. Somehow those glowing red eyes that should have caused trepidation were soothing him.

"I do," Sasori said, kissing the blond's forehead. Deidara let himself relax, even though he hadn't missed the worry clouding the scarlet eyes.

"What's wrong?" he inquired carefully. "Something's still bothering you."

Again there was long silence, but this time Deidara was sure it wasn't because Sasori was wondering whether to answer or not, but was just weighing his words to find the right ones.

"You're right," Sasori admitted. "It's this weird feeling. I've been wondering why I can't drink the blood from the blood bank anymore."

"What feeling?" Deidara frowned. Sasori didn't sound like his confident self anymore. He sounded concerned and it was strangely alerting. Deidara felt dread crawling upon him.

Sasori sighed heavily. "It's hard to explain. I can't feed on blood bank blood anymore, only humans. And something inside me tells me that I wouldn't be able to feed on anyone else other than you."

"So that makes me like an addiction?" Deidara asked, feeling uncomfortable at his words. He coughed back the lump in his throat. "I mean, my blood. Not me." The words upset him. He had always thought of them as more than friends with benefits. He thought they had grown close.

He could have been wrong. Because after all, what could he be to a vampire? Blood. Vampires saw humans as food.

Deidara brought his hand up to secretly wipe a tear from the corner of his eye.

"I don't think that's it," Sasori said, appearing oblivious of the chaos that was going on inside the blond on his chest. "An addiction, yes. But not just your blood. There's more."

Deidara snorted humorlessly. "Right. Sex, too."

Sasori's eyebrows furrowed and he looked down. "Deidara, what're you-?" He couldn't finish the question as Deidara had already sat up and got off the bed, looking around on the floor for his boxers and pants.

"If that's all I am to you, flesh and blood, then pardon me for taking offence," Deidara snapped, pulling on the checkered boxers he'd found lying close to the bed.

"I just said that wasn't it, didn't I?" Sasori growled, sitting up as well. "What're you getting angry about?"

Deidara was boiling with anger just staring at the redhead. How could he not understand? Was he stupid?! Or didn't he just want to understand? Didn't he care?

"You disappeared for a week and all I've been hearing about is how you can't live without my blood! Sorry if it makes me a bit self-conscious," he spat sarcastically.

"Well what do you want to hear then?!" Sasori demanded just as angrily.

"Nothing that's not true!" Deidara zipped up his jeans and put on the shirt that had a few red stains on it. "Just go see a doctor or something to get your appetite fixed. Then you can leave me alone and let me live my life."

"I told you it's not the blood! It's you!" Sasori blurted out.

Deidara halted as he was about to open the door and turned around. "What?" he asked in a much quieter tone of voice.

Sasori heaved a heavy sigh and ran a hand across his face. "It's not just the blood. It's you, the whole existence of you. Your whole being has become like a drug to me and I'm not sure a doctor could fix it."

Deidara felt like the words he'd just heard had grown hands and were reaching right into his chest to squeeze his heart. "Sasori..."

Sasori shook his head. "You're not obliged to stay. You can leave. I'll manage."

Deidara let go of the handle of the door and walked back to the redhead. He wrapped his hands around the vampire and buried his face in his neck. Somehow he felt guilty. Like it was his fault the other was now struggling with this.

"I'm sorry," the blond whispered.

Sasori caressed his head in a soft motion. "It's not your fault, don't feel guilty."

Deidara didn't say anything, only hugged the other tighter.

Sasori sighed again. "I'm serious."

"Sasori," Deidara whispered, his voice throaty with emotion.

"Hm?"

"I-I think I'm in love with you."

Sasori didn't say anything. Deidara was afraid of letting go of him and seeing his face, knowing he'd see an emotion he didn't want to see plastered on the vampire's face. He decided to get it all out before taking that crucial step.

"But - I'm afraid you're only with me because of the addiction. Like an illness."

"Don't think of it like that," Sasori whispered, "you're not an illness. And the addiction is a part of me. A part of who I am now. You're not at fault."

He pressed his lips against the blonde hair and rubbed the boy's back as Deidara was struggling with making the new lump in his throat disappear.

-x-

"Good evening," Deidara muttered to the librarian as he entered the library and walked past her, not once glancing at her skinny in the extreme body, those bony fingers on the keyboard, those wide-rimmed round black glasses that made her look like granny Harry Potter or the messy curls hanging loose like a bird's nest.

She looked up and barked after him, "Hey, you, make it quick! I'm locking up soon, whether you're still in here or not!"

Deidara ignored her out of habit and headed towards the computers. He plopped down behind one and opened up a web browser, typing into the search bar: Vampire addiction.

He did not know where he was going with Sasori. Much less did he know what was going on with Sasori and how he felt about it himself. Yes, he had said that he was in love with Sasori, which was disturbingly true. He had realized it weeks ago but hadn't dared to tell the other yet. Now that the redhead had made his ultimate confession, Deidara had seen it as a suitable time to confess as well.

Regardless, he was not sure what he expected from the future. Could he handle being someone's drug? Could he handle Sasori living solely on his blood like he was a refrigerator of endless supplies? Could he handle the responsibility that was having a person's life depending on him?

Did he want it to be like this? Was this the kind of relationship he wished for?

When being with Sasori, he had always thought of their relationship being the dangerous kind – they were breaking all school rules, social norms, official laws. Had anyone found out, Sasori could legally be beheaded for drinking from a human and Deidara could be arrested for keeping it a secret (every human was supposed to inform the police should something like this happen).

He had been okay with it so far, though. It got the adrenaline working its way through his veins and he liked the feeling of living on the edge while having Sasori to cling onto.

But the circumstances had changed drastically. And now he wasn't sure he could put up with it anymore.

He tapped his fingers impatiently against the desk as the website loaded.

Much to his irritation the results were mostly of some energy drink with a ridiculous-looking logo. He scrolled past them and went as far as three pages before deciding to change the key word.

Vampire addicted to individual

He needed to start finding answers, instead of just thinking up new questions. Answers, focusing on answers. As finding answers to his own feelings was more difficult, he had decided to start with the easier steps – find out what was going on with Sasori.

After four pages of fruitless search, he finally came upon a forum where an anonymous had posted the following:

Hello all

Before I write this, I'd like to ask you to spare me of comments like "it's your own fault", "you asked for it" etc. I'm aware of this and trying to cope.

Thing is, I started seeing a human. It was only a one-night thing at first, but she came around again and it happened again and honestly, I liked her company. Not just what vampires usually look for in humans, but I felt good just being with her. It felt nice. We had lots to talk about and she is a very intelligent and witty being.

One day she came up to me and told me she thought what we had had grown into something bigger. For her, at least. She said she was in love and wanted to know how I felt about it and about her.

I didn't know what to say. I don't want to lose her. It's only been three weeks, but I feel like I've grown attached to her. I don't know what I'd do without her.

Yet I'm not sure this is love. I've studied very little of vampirology, but can we even fall in love? I know of blood attachment between two vampires but with humans...? Their blood is different from ours.

I don't want to lie to her and she got very upset when I tried to explain it. She accused me of using her only for the blood, but I don't think that's it! I don't believe it! I liked her company, I liked just being with her and talking. Her touch. Sex and blood were more like a bonus to me. I mean, humans have sex when they're in love, right? (I did some research.) And vampires feed also while making love.

Can anyone explain this to me? I care about her and don't want her to suffer. Can I say I'm in love in human terms?

Deidara frowned. There was nothing about not being able to drink blood from blood banks here. However, as it was the closest he had come to finding what he was looking for so far, he decided to give it a try and look into the replies.

He scrolled past the short ones with no more than one sentence without even reading them. He knew that the reply he needed was at least a paragraph long with plenty of explanations.

He stopped at one promising in looks.

That is quite a mess you got yourself in.

Frankly, I know nothing of humans as I major in history. But I happen to have a piece of knowledge in that subject that may interest you and maybe even answer your question.

In 2500 BC one of the fastest growing trends was human slavery, which lasted till the Great War in 1900s (Deidara winced at this). Back then kings would pick out the finest of human species and bring them to live in their castles. They would have their own rooms and were treated well (as opposed to what you would think when hearing the word 'slave') mainly because they needed to be in a good condition for the king to enjoy their taste and more intimate contact.

Kings, greedy as they were, would always have more than 5 slaves at once.

Prince Kai of Alexandria, lived in 1500 BC, was given a single human boy for his 17th birthday. They say his father, King Rai, was too greedy to give his son any more than that. The human was given to the prince for him to do as he pleased with.

They say he got attached. Severely attached. Like an addiction. His maids were the first to notice that the two were always together no matter where the prince went and informed the king.

The king had his son put in prison for rehab. The human was to be executed. Hanged. The prince was taken to see it. Turned out the king was just as cruel as he was greedy. He was afraid this "addiction" could've damaged their reputation.

What he hadn't foreseen was that the prince would attempt to rescue his slave. He was dressed in convict clothes when he ran onto the platform to stop the hangman. The hangman did not recognize him and killed him without a second of thought. The human was hanged seconds later.

Doctors thought the problem to have been that there had been only one slave, resulting in the prince growing so addicted to that one individual that he gave up his life in an attempt to save him. That's why the royalty from then on were always advised to have a dozen of slaves, just to be on the safe side. Hence even nowadays, (even though drinking from humans is strictly forbidden, let's face it, vamps still do it) it is always wise to have more than one "source of blood".

I wish you good luck and hope that you are no son of a king.

Deidara continued staring blankly at the screen long after he'd finished reading it. Sasori had not been drinking on any other humans, he was sure of it. And this anonymous had said he had felt attached already on the third week.

Sasori had been coming to Deidara's room for over four months.

Only when the librarian's shrieking threatened to pierce his ear drums did Deidara stop staring to quickly close the tabs and leave the library.