I'm new at this
thing, so bear with me please! Thanks for reading
this. It's is just a short story that my other Invader Zim obsessed
friends and I came up with at lunch at school one day. It's
actually a part of another larger story, but you don't need to know
about those to understand this one.
Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim – this incredible show belongs to the ingenious Jhonen Vasquez.
"So…if I move this battle cruiser to the right, and the Voot to the left, I can successfully demolish the Exclunium race!" said a young Irken named Zim to his friend Snix while playing a game of Galactic Invasion ™ © ®.
"Hmm…and if I move this cruiser to the top right corner, I could set my bowl of Cheeto's directly in front of me!" said Snix happily.
Zim sighed deeply. "Your stomach controls your mind, Snix."
"And, isn't that awesome?" asked Snix, scarfing down a few handfuls of Cheeto's.
Zim grimaced, and turned back to his game board battle plans. "So…back to the game…"
"Ah, yes," Snix said. "Speaking of that, who are you taking to the Intergalactic Dance?"
"What does that have to do with…never mind. I'm not going to the dance. I can't dance. Plus, it would ruin my image, especially because I am ZIM, and I am going to be one of the elite Invaders. And…"
"Zim."
"What?"
"First, stop monologing. Second, you have to go. It's required."
"What! Why?" whined Zim.
"There's no reason, man," Snix said, scarfing down more Cheeto's.
Zim scowled. "That's disgusting. Fine. So I have to take a…girl…a very unworthy girl…to this…this…dance…?" The young Irken groaned, and then shuddered. "The whole romance and couples stuff is really horrendous to think about. Who's left to take, then?"
"I think there are two girls left," responded Snix. "Tenn and Tak."
Zim was shocked. "Tenn doesn't have a date already? She's the most popular girl in the Academy!"
"I know. But maybe she's simply waiting for…I dunno…something…that we wouldn't really understand anyway," replied Snix.
"Yes, I suppose. Well, I'm definitely taking Tenn."
"Ha! I was going to," Snix said with amusement.
"I think I should," said Zim with a smirk.
"How about we make a deal? Whoever loses has to take Tak," suggested Snix.
"I feel sorry for you, then," said Zim, grinning evilly. "It's agreed to. So, what's the deal?"
"I'll win it. You're taking Tak."
"What's the deal?" Zim frowned.
"Whoever eats the most Cheeto's gets to take Tenn to the dance," said Snix with a malicious grin.
Zim blinked. "But…Cheeto's make me sick."
"Exactly."
"That's not fair, Snix!"
"You already agreed! A deal's a deal, and you can't go back on your word. Your mistake. You should have asked me what the agreement was. So…ha, ha, ha. " Snix patted Zim on the back as Zim stared blankly at Snix. "Have fun with titanium mouth……er…I mean…Tak." And with that Snix left Zim to be alone with his game.
Zim miserably sat staring at the wall. His first thought was how this whole 'dance' issue was going to make his ego appear to be softened, and that in itself would not make him quality Invader material. And then there was the issue of Tak, who had a set of teeth-correctors so massive that one could probably land a battle cruiser on them. Zim shuddered at the thought, and then sighed.
"I suppose that I might as well get this over with," he said quietly, standing up slowly as though he was in pain, and then he too walked out of the room.
(Page break)
Tak was totally distraught. She couldn't find a date to the Intergalactic Dance. She would be the only girl without a date. All of the girls would ridicule her more than they already did. Although, she understood why she wasn't well sought after by the Irken boys. She had a huge set of braces that were not just on her mouth. The entire set went around the back and top of her head. It looked like a neck brace attached to her mouth.
It wasn't just the braces that caused her to be ridiculed. She was barely able to talk clearly through the contraption. The words that came out of her mouth were horribly lisped. She sounded very weird when she talked, and she knew it. But the good news was that the braces were scheduled to come off next week, unless something drastic happened to them. Tak laughed at that.
Suddenly, a very slow knock came at her front door. Tak assumed it was yet another dentist. She sighed and got up, casually walking over to the door. She opened it and jumped in surprise.
Standing in the doorway was one of her classmates, Zim. He looked really pained. He looked up at her nervously and said, "Hello Tak," after which he averted his gaze.
'Aw, he's shy,' thought Tak with a quick smile. She had to admit, she had always liked Zim. Not in that way, but as a pretty nice guy. Sure, he was a bit hot-headed, egotistical, and flamboyant, but she still liked him. Tak stared at Zim as though she was in a trance: all starry-eyed.
Zim wasn't on the same thought level as Tak. He coughed. "Um…why are you looking at me like that?" he asked hesitantly, snapping Tak out of her trance.
"Uh…um…no reashun," she stammered through her lisp.
"OK," he said with a quick shake of his head. "I lost a bet, so I have to take you to the Intergalactic Dance."
Tak stared at him in astonishment. "Hhyou…hhyou……want to…take…me!"
Zim was about to question what she meant by 'want to,' but instead he replied "Sure."
Tak was absolutely overjoyed. She clapped her hands together and squealed in delight. Before Zim could say a word, she threw herself into his arms and started to cry happily. Zim, on the other hand, staggered as he caught her, utterly confused at this girl's reaction. He had never been or had the desire to be in this position before. He looked around worriedly, to be sure no one was watching the situation.
"Shhank you, shhank you, shhank you!" said Tak, standing back up and looking him right in the eyes.
"Um…you're welcome…" said Zim uncertainly.
"Hhyou don't know how happy you'f made me!" she exclaimed, giving him yet another hug.
Zim tried, in as nice of a manner as he could, to unwrap himself from her embrace. After several seconds with no success, he panicked and pushed Tak away.
"Sorry," he mumbled as he hurriedly brushed himself off.
"It'th fine," she said with a huge grin on her face. "When are you going to pihhk me up for the danth?"
"Oh, I have to do that, too?" Zim asked, trying to conceal his disgust as he wiped lisped spit off his forehead. "How about at five o'clock?"
"I'm thoh exhhited!" she squealed. "OK, thhee you then! Thith ith going to be thoh muthh fun!" She giggled and blew Zim a kiss, and then shut her front door. Once it was shut, she leaned against it and allowed herself to slide down slowly. "I'm not as muthh of a pathetihhk thhlimplod ath I thought! I haff a date! And he ith thhomeone who liketh me, otherwithe he wouldn't haff athked me out!" She couldn't keep herself from crying again.
Meanwhile on the other side of the door, and the other side of the spectrum, Zim stood looking absolutely dumbfounded. He shook his head in disbelief and as he turned to go, he looked up at the evening Irk sky and said, "What went wrong?"
